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Is male menopause a reality?As opposed to the sudden drop in ovulation and hormonal levels in women, menopause in men is a gradual process. The consequences in men aren't that clear. The health risks, though, are significant and it is important to recognize the symptoms of male menopause early on. Read along to know more. A testosterone level of 300-1200 ng/dL is considered normal in a healthy male. As one ages, the testosterone levels too drop gradually. After 30 years of age, the levels drop by 1% per year. By the time a man crosses 50 years of age, he is in menopause. Look out for the following signs to know if your testosterone levels are dropping : Low Libido : A low sex drive or decrease in inclination to have sex is the first sign of decreasing testosterone levels. Erectile Dysfunction : Testosterone is responsible for releasing nitric oxide that leads to erection. As the levels of testosterone decrease with age, getting an erection and maintaining it for longer periods of time may become difficult. Low Semen Level : The normal amount of semen ejaculated each time varies between 0.1 and 10 mL. This normal level is due to the efficient functioning of the testes, seminal vesicles, and prostate, all of which work under the influence of testosterone. As you age, the testosterone levels drop and the amount of semen ejaculated also drops. Orgasm Troubles : As you age, having an orgasm every time may be a bit difficult due to the dropping testosterone levels. Mood Swings : This happens in men as much as in women! The interesting thing here is that the man who suffers from it is the last one to note it and acknowledge. So, if you find yourself snapping and getting irritated at the smallest of things, get your testosterone levels checked. Depression : When you feel dull and demotivated at all times, and even doing the slightest of activity seems like a chore, it means that your testosterone levels have dropped to a significantly low level. Abdominal Fat : This is again an early sign of decreasing testosterone level. Belly fat is a sign of advancing age. Low testosterone levels are a sign of advancing age. Not all men who have low testosterone levels may show symptoms. In such cases, there is no need for any kind of treatment. Low testosterone may also be due to some other conditions like thyroid disease, excessive alcohol use, sleep apnea, etc. After 30 years of age, the levels of testosterone drop by 1% per year. By the time a man crosses 50 years of age he is in menopause. Identifying and eliminating these causes will restore the testosterone levels to normal. However, if no cause can be attributed to the low testosterone levels, it is a clear indication of normal aging and 'menopause.' As with women, men too have the option of hormone replacement therapy. However, this treatment is controversial. In some men, the testosterone replacement may relive several symptoms, but the risks far outweigh the benefits. An increased chance of heart attack, prostate cancer, and other health problems are associated with testosterone replacement therapy. Herbal supplements for problems associated with decreasing testosterone levels are generally considered safe, but they too have no proven health benefits and are known to increase the risks for prostate cancer. Male menopause isn't as dramatic and abrupt as the menopause in women, but it is a reality. It happens gradually over a period of several years.
Preparing for fatherhoodFrom the time you decide to go for a baby, all the attention is concentrated on the mother-to-be. And this is not without reason, since she is the one that's going to bear the child for the next nine months. But that doesn't mean that the man's role is any less important. It is important for the father-to-be to ready himself for the next phase of his life. Following a healthy lifestyle Fertility is a growing problem. As per statistics more than 45% of infertility issues are related to men. Therefore, eating healthy food, exercising and living the healthy way will boost your chances of getting over these problems. Nutrition has an impact on the sperm production. So scrap the junk food for a while and get on to a healthy lifestyle. Men need to get at least 12 to 15 mg of zinc each day. Even short-term zinc deficiencies can reduce semen volume and testosterone levels, much needed for healthy sperms. Good sources of zinc include baked beans (a one-cup serving has 3.55 mg), nuts, cereals, seafood, and chicken meat (2.38 mg per three ounces). Regular intake of vitamins and calcium is a must to improve male fertility and prevent sperm defects. Natural sources of calcium such as fat-free milk and curd can be consumed. Get atleast 90mg of vitamin C daily. This boosts immunity. More will be needed if you smoke. Folic acid is a fuel for healthy sperms. Dads need 400 micrograms of it and green leafy vegetables are good sources of this nutrient. Dads-to-be can take the liberty to grab the extra cup of mocha. Caffeine may help men by stimulating sperm motility. Quit smoking and drinking The party's over for your partner once you start trying for a baby, but what about you? Same goes for men. Now is the time to stop smoking, and to stop any excessive consumption of alcohol. A man who smokes has a lower sperm count and a misshapen sperm, incapable of creating a child. Heavy or binge drinking can seriously affect ability to produce quality sperm. Exercise Add exercise session to your daily routine if you aren't doing them already. Exercise improves general health, stamina, and sperm quality. Start with walking for 15 minutes and increase it gradually if you have never exercised before. If you are trying for a baby, avoid exercising in tight-fitting briefs. It causes damage to sperms. Frequent sessions in a sauna or hot tub, long bicycle rides, or any such activity that could cause the testicles to become overheated can compromise the health of sperm and should be avoided. Medical examinations It is a good idea for the father-to-be to have a complete check-up to assess if there are any issues that need to be addressed before trying for a baby. Some conditions to watch out for include: Varicocele, a condition of varicose veins on the scrotum, the sac of skin that contains the testicles. It can lead to infertility. The condition is entirely treatable, so talk to your doctor about the options. Conditions like erectile dysfunction, diabetes, and prostatitis can cause infertility. Sexually transmitted infections, which may cause male infertility. Your doctor can help you get tested and treated. Your doctor can refer you to urologist or a male fertility specialist if you need additional testing or treatments. Remember to discuss possible hereditary birth defects with your doctor. Share with her the medical history of yours and your wife's family. Get finances organized Plan a baby budget. You surely want to give the best to your child. Start planning now. Consider expenses like baby food, diapers, toys, doctor visits, clothes, and day care. This will help you in the future. And this is the perfect time as you are just in the planning phase of baby making. Take advantage of this time before the baby arrives to get things in order concerning your job, insurance and budget plan. If you and your spouse discuss and agree on expectations, goals and strategies now, you can avoid arguments on money later. After all, you don't want baby to pick up on any tension. Dump your stress Chilling out can increase your potency. So the 'go for a holiday' advice actually works. Practise regular meditation or any exercise that will help bring down your stress levels. Try reading books on fatherhood or parenting and learn tips and advices well in advance. So gear up and start preparing for the change from being the coolest dude to the coolest dad.It is your responsibility to help your partner in all possible ways and make her feel that you are equally excited and keen for having a baby.
The post-delivery bluesA baby being born is cause for celebration. Especially in a country like India, where the family ties tend to be close, there is a festive atmosphere at home. However, sometimes the mothers may not share the same enthusiasm. This wave of negative emotions in the middle of what is clearly a happy occasion can be confusing for the new mother. Interestingly these feelings are not abnormal, as many new moms face postpartum depression, which is also called baby blues. It is an emotional reaction that begins a few days after delivery and lasts not more than 2 weeks. What are the symptoms of postpartum depression? Feelings of anger or irritability. Lack of interest in the baby. Lack of appetite and sleep disturbance. Crying and sadness. Irritability or hypersensitivity. Feelings of guilt, shame or hopelessness. Loss of interest, joy or pleasure in the things you used to enjoy. Possible thoughts of harming the baby or yourself. What are the causes of postpartum depression? Postpartum depression can occur due to a combination of factors. Hormonal changes: Changes in the level of hormones can leave you feeling tired, sluggish and depressed. Changes in your blood volume, blood pressure, immune system and metabolism can contribute to fatigue and mood swings. Emotional factors: Feeling overwhelmed with the new arrival in the family, and taking care of the baby day and night, may leave you sleep deprived, overexerted, and anxious. New mothers also feel that they look less attractive after pregnancy. You may feel that people around you are concerned with the baby more than you, and that you are being neglected. All these emotional factors may lead to postpartum depression. Other factors: Issues like breast feeding, financial strain, and relationship troubles can also contribute to postpartum depression. How does one deal with postpartum depression? Take complete rest and sleep for sufficient hours Spend quality time with your husband Go for healthy diet Take morning or evening walk for fresh air Try to follow yoga or other exercises Share your feelings with your husband or friends Do not overexert Join some groups for new moms Go for individual therapy or counsellors Remember, postpartum depression is not an incurable problem. It is just a temporary state of mind, which can be overcome if you are sufficiently aware of the problem.                
Menopause and mental health!Menopause is the period in a woman's life when her man claims she is going crazy. It is also the time when her period is on the decline and hormones are in complete disarray. Depression, insomnia, irritability, mood swings and lack of concentration are few symptoms that the lady has to battle with. These symptoms may begin as early as 4 years before the actual menopause and may continue for several years after that! For women, menopause is a significant turning point in their lives. The dropping levels of oestrogen and the resultant physical and mental symptoms can be like a cycle of events, only adding to their woes! Depression: Depression affects every middle-aged woman. An estimated 20% of women have depression at some point during menopause. The peak period for depression is during the perimenopausal years, when the woman is approaching menopause. The reason for this, say experts, is the fact that most women dread menopause. Even though for some it means an end to years of menstrual cramps, for most others it signifies an end to their womanhood. The very idea is sufficient enough to bring on lots of negative thoughts and depression. Not only this, the reason for depression during perimenopausal and menopausal age is the fluctuating hormones. Research shows that the levels of reproductive hormones, specifically oestrogen are responsible for the mental changes. Changes in the sleep pattern: Insomnia is seen in 40 to 50% of women in the menopausal transition phase. Women who spend sleepless nights are more likely than others to show irritability, crankiness, stress and depressive symptoms. Sleep disturbances during menopause have been linked to the decreasing oestrogen levels. Indeed this claim can be held true as several women respond positively to exogenous hormone therapy. One study claims that sleep changes are linked to the Luteinizing Hormone levels, which also results in increased body temperature. Sleep apnea too occurs in the menopausal transition age. This is due to decreased progesterone level, as progesterone plays an important role in respiration. The weight gain that happens during menopause has also been shown to cause sleep apnea. Panic disorder: Panic disorder is commonly seen during the perimenopause stage. Existing disorder may worsen or new disorder may arise. Panic disorder is usually manifested in women who show several physical symptoms of menopause. The panic attacks are usually associated with negative life events, pre-existing medical diseases and decreased daily functionality. Obsessive compulsive disorder: New onset of OCD, worsening of the existing condition or change in the pattern of symptoms is seen during menopause. OCD changes are also observed during pregnancy and during the menstrual changes, suggesting the impact of hormones on symptoms of OCD. Bipolar disorder: Women with bipolar disorder experience an exacerbation of symptoms during the perimenopausal stage. These women are also the ones that are highly likely to experience severe depression in the menopausal phase. Schizophrenia: Schizophrenia usually manifests itself in young adulthood. The rate of new cases decreases gradually thereafter, in both men and women. In women, however, there is a second peak in the 45-50 years age group. This peak is not observed in men. This suggests that oestrogen may play a significant role in triggering schizophrenia or worsening the pre-existing condition.
Your child is ready for school... but are you?It was still okay. Just 2-3 hours which you could utilize for other things while your child was away briefly. Now you will have to compete along with teachers, textbooks and homework for your child's attention. Well Mother, we know this is going to be difficult for you, but let's see if we can try and make it any easier. Think of school as an extension of the tender loving care that you provided. The only difference is that the TLC will go towards nurturing and developing his/her brain and help it learn important skills which will help gain a balanced development. At this point your child feels bad and completely unsafe in this new hostile world of teachers and uniforms and what not! If you weaken at this point your child will cop on and then will come the emotional blackmail. So explain the importance of school to your child as it will make the transition easier. It is always good for mothers to accompany their children to school but imagine watching mother walk away and all hell can break loose. So if your child's school has a school bus facility you can walk him to the bus stop and then say your goodbyes there. A lump in the throat at the bus stop is preferable any day than a scene at school with a child holding on to mother for dear life. Do not criticize your child's school or assignments given by them as children can catch on quite quickly and that can be reason enough for them not to concentrate on school activities. Always encourage your child to talk about what he did at school and ask him questions about his friends and teachers. This gives the impression that school is as important as home and gradually even you will reconcile yourself to the fact that school is here to stay.
The male ego: Fragile male self-esteemIn a world where men are constantly competing with one another, adding a woman to this dynamic changes the perception for majority of men. The fact that a woman is doing better than a man can largely affect relationships at a personal and professional level. Simple things like opening a door for men or even pulling a chair for him can make him feel self-insufficient. The whole concept of a woman doing something/anything better than him brings down his self-esteem. In a relationship the roots go deeper and men who are making less money or not doing as well as their partners have a more fragile self-esteem. The mental insecurity that a woman may be a better provider for the family and has more potential than he does, changes the dynamic of his relationship, while for women this does not seem to be the case. Fragile self-esteem alters your everyday determination and persistence. Without being determined, the only way to go is downwards. When self-esteem is affected by women doing things that he can do, men seem to take it in a negative manner and lower their self-esteem. Small examples of this in our day to day life are - driving your own car as compared to having a driver, being physically weaker than a woman, etc. Men are creating rules to ensure that women who are considered lower than them cannot perform or do better than them. Systems and frameworks are made which ensure that situations never come up where a "lower person" does better than a man can, all out of the fear that they can't perform! From the day we are born to the rest of our lives, we are drilled with the fact that men are better, stronger, and smarter than women. So when situations arise where she is doing or has done better than you, the male self-esteem is questioned and, most of the time, drops. Being the person you are meant to be, you would automatically create a system by your choice and influence it to reduce the possibility of any other to be able to achieve what you have, in turn increasing your self-esteem. However, when the other overcomes or surpasses this obstacle, your self-esteem will be hit hard causing a drop in your self-esteem like the stock exchange does on its bad days. Self-esteem is a very personal topic and completely dependent on the situations you have encountered across your life. However, when majority of these are leaning in one direction then there is no question of failure. Consider a world dominated by women, What would happen to your self-esteem? Do you think you would survive in this kind of world, a world in which all your thoughts are limited by restrictions and rules you have to adhere too, to ensure things like your family name is kept out of shame. So let us all do as the women have been doing for centuries, embrace it, and learn to maintain our self-preservation and esteem irrespective of our surroundings. This may sound hard but let us work towards a world where women and men are equal. Don't let your self-esteem be affected by your surroundings, if you know your surroundings are not the best for the future.
Accepting your flawsThere are basically two kinds of 'flaws,' one that is physical and the other that is in your personality. A physical 'flaw' like being too short, fat, or darkis never a person's fault. Thus accepting what you are can only boost your self-esteem and confidence. Despite these 'shortcomings,' it is your character and your achievements that stand out in the long run and not the way you look. The first step in creating a better life is accepting if you are wrong! Personality traits and habits are mostly visible to others but not to you. These are those faults that can cause bitterness in relationships or cause problems at work or in our social interactions. Some people lose their temper easily, some are lazy, and some are rude, while some are either introverts or extroverts. If you have flaws that can cause problems for others then the best thing you can do is to change those negative traits in yourself. Character flaws might be natural, but they can affect others negatively. The first thing in making improvements is to analyze yourself. What are you so angry about ? Is it really some other person's fault or that you have had a bad day at the office? Give it a thought and once you find the answers, you will feel relieved. Accept your physical flaws and love yourself for what you are, as this is the key to lasting happiness. Major flaws like alcoholism, splurging money, borrowing money, or addictions are what one should be willing to overcome. If you accept you have any of these major flaws and need help to overcome them, then you need to seek help. There are professionals who can help out, provided you are a willing party to the process. Improvement will come only if you are willing to change. Remember that flaws are easy to acknowledge and to change;the only thing required is the desire within you to do so.
Sleep tight at every good night!A good night's sleep! Oh, what would some of us give for that luxury! Sure, you can blame it on the fast paced world and the things you have to do to keep the competition off your turf, and millions of other reasons to be sleep deprived. Yes, sleeping soundly and regularly is well within our control. Maybe it has eluded you so far and you are caught in a vicious circle of staring at the ceiling for hours on end; so read on to see what simple things you can do to gently drift off in to the arms of nature's greatest restorative- beauty sleep. Do's and don'ts for beauty sleep Fix a regular bed time, so that your brain will adjust to this by sending sleep signals to the body. If your bedtime is completely at the mercy of your activities then even as fatigue sets in the body will refuse to obey. So, even as your body is screaming for rest, the mind does otherwise. This is where good old discipline comes in to play. Take in to consideration the activities which are absolutely necessary to do and note the frequency with which they are likely to interfere with your bedtime before setting a realistic bed time. Initially the mind will refuse to obey, and you are most likely to get up, after tossing and turning in bed, to switch on the computer or whatever it is that you do when you cheat your bedtime. Rest assured, in a couple of days the brain will get used to this sleep routine and prepare you for shut down. Sleeping well also largely depends on how stress free you are. If the mind is in a state of constant excitement or anxiety, sleep will elude you. So when you lie down to sleep you need to fade out and blank everything out- joy and sorrow; expectations and ambitions, all of these out for later access! Tell yourself that tomorrow is another day and what you need today, is a state of neutrality! That's what most Indian philosophers would want you to do anyway. A good eight hours of sleep may depend largely on our minds but external factors can matter too. Sleep comes easily when your mattress is comfortable and not too soft or too hard. Use a pillow that won't give you neck pain, as any discomfort in the neck is likely to throw sleep off gear. Wearing clean night clothes can give you better quality of sleep. That goes for the bed spread as well.  Try this for yourself. Tight and uncomfortable night clothing is not recommended as this will only make you wriggle about for comfort. A cozy blanket and some clean nightclothes make great bedtime mates. Some people have a nightcap to help them sleep better while others still, drink themselves to sleep. Alcohol in large doses can only numb but does not help you sleep and you will only find yourself waking up frequently. Sleeping pills can be habit forming and might have serious side effects in the long run. So try simple remedies like a glass of warm milk or hot chocolate before bedtime to help you sleep better. Avoid stimulants like coffee, tea or nicotine before bedtime as that can keep your nerves all hyper thus making sleep quite difficult to come by. Computers and television are also largely responsible for us staying up late and disrupting our sleep patterns. We often find ourselves mechanically flipping channels or browsing without any real need for it. Try and go offline before bedtime, especially if you want to be able to schedule your sleep time. Television or movies can excite the brain and then you will find it difficult to fall asleep. So about an hour before bedtime switch off the telly or computer and just sit quietly and do some deep breathing exercises. Just sit cross legged for about ten minutes and relax your body. You are now ready for a deep slumber.
5 cardinal sins for the skinWhile cigarettes may not constitute food in the strictest sense, it does have a profound effect on skin complexion, health, color and tone. We eat that we may live, but sometimes we eat way too much and consume stuff that may be extremely hazardous to our health. Since we are talking about skin, here are 5 most hazardous foods for your skin: Grease adds to the crease Since healthy skin is all about healthy blood circulation, any food which is likely to clog up the blood vessels internally is deemed bad for skin tone. Packaged snacks like potato chips may have edible oil written in bold but this contributes significantly to the slowing down of 'collagen and elastin syntheses' which in turn causes the skin to appear aged and all wrinkly. The french fries that we consume as a TV snack can also cause an acne outbreak on the skin and face. Gluten Glutton Gluten is a substance found in wheat and other food grains. We may not even be aware that some of the food grains have gluten as a main constituent. Gluten intolerance can also cause inflammations on the skin in the form of rashes or acne. Bad news is that the pizzas, pastas, cakes and bread that we get off the rack may be heavy in gluten (Surprised that they don't say that on the pack) and that may be the reason for you to lose precious skin tone. So seek gluten free foods, though that might not be the easiest of tasks, but for your skin, it certainly will be worth it. Caffeine - the skin coffin If you are one of those coffee addicts then you may as well write an obituary column lamenting the loss of your skin tone and complexion. It's not without reason that health freaks love bashing coffee beans and caffeine rich beverages, as they are truly hazardous. How? Studies have proven that just 2-3 cups stimulate pituitary-adrenocortical response. Yes, but what does that have to do with your skin? Well this leads to the hormone cortisol to increase in our bodies. Cortisol is known as the stress hormone! So now here's what it does to your skin -it accelerates the ageing process which means wrinkled skin and causes dehydration causing the skin to show an unusual pallor. So before you turn the coffee faucet on think twice. Fad to Black How fad diets are not skin friendly? Some people go on a high protein, low-carb diet which could sound the death knell as far as complexion goes. Dieting depletes calcium levels, which means your bones are going to suffer and what's the point of having skin on bad bone density? Besides low-carb diets can utterly wreck the complexion as the delicate PH balance in the skin is ruined. Some of the meat, poultry and dairy products too can have artificial chemicals injected in them which cause a hormonal imbalance in our bodies leading to skin disasters. Fruits and vegetables have chemicals injected too sometimes! Beware! Cereal Killers Cereal killers are those people who ignore the need of a proper diet for skin health. So anybody who indulges in too much sugar, caffeine and greasy food stuffs is a 'Cereal Killer' A lack of cereals in the diet can literally kill your skin. Cereal foods have high fiber and antioxidants for moisturizing the skin and protecting it from skin damage. For great skin other than cereals which are simply fabulous for keeping skin hydrated and breathing easily, one can eat fruits, olive oil, healthy fats, almonds, tofu, grains, nuts and the good old vitamin B rich products. Ceramides in raw food diets, organic foods, wheat germ and brown rice protect the epidermis of the skin and make it impervious to external attacks and pollutants while maintaining their tone and beauty.
A quick guide to high blood pressureWhat is blood pressure? Blood pressure is the force or pressure exerted by blood on the walls of arteries while flowing through it. What is normal? A blood pressure value of 120/80 mm Hg is ideally said to be the normal. The upper value (systolic) reads the pressure when the heart beats (squeezes to pump the blood). The lower value (diastolic) computes pressure at rest in between the heartbeats when the heart refills with blood. What is hypertension or high blood pressure? The condition in which the pressure of blood in the arteries is persistently high.More the pressure, harder the heart has to work to pump the blood. The prolonged and too high blood pressure (BP) raises the heart's work persistently and can lead to grave damage to the arteries. This eventually leads to uncontrolled high blood pressure raising the risk of heart disease, stroke, and kidney disease in the long run.A blood pressure above 130/90 mm Hg is said to be high. What are the symptoms of hypertension? Hypertension can go unnoticed without any symptoms and thus remain untreated for years altogether. Thus, it is also called as silent killer sometimes. What causes hypertension? The cause of hypertension is unknown in most of the cases. Sometimes, hypertension occurs secondary to kidney disease or adrenal gland disease. Who are at risk of getting high BP? The risk of developing high blood pressure is more in people above the age of 45, those who have close relatives already suffering from hypertension, and who have history of diabetes, Many people consistently have blood pressure above normal, yet not so high to be called as hypertension (130-140 /80-90). These people are at more risk of developing hypertension. Is salt and blood pressure are related? Sodium content of salt causes water retention thus putting more burden on heart and raising blood pressure. So watch the foods you eat for sodium content and stick to a low-sodium diet. Stress and high blood pressure Stress can increase the blood pressure, but no scientific facts to suggest that it causes hypertension. Stress can lead to addictions, poor diet, lack of sleep which can indirectly contribute to high blood pressure and heart disease. Obesity and hypertension Obesity strains heart and raises the risk. Losing every kilo makes a huge difference. Alcohol  Alcohol can surely raise blood pressure and limiting it mandatory. Pregnancy and hypertension High blood pressure during pregnancy is called as gestational hypertension. It can cause serious complications like preeclampsia. It can harm both the mother and baby. It can compromise oxygen flow to the baby. The blood pressure normalizes after child's birth. Medicines and hypertension Some medicines, like pain killers, birth control pills, steroids, flu medicines etc. can cause the blood pressure to rise. Be careful with the medications. Avoid over-the-counter medications and take doctor's advice before consuming any medicine. "White coat" phenomenon Some people show high blood pressure in doctor's clinic due to nervousness. This is called as white coat phenomenon. These people are at risk of developing high blood pressure. Kids and hypertension Kids who are obese and have a family history are more at risk. How to control high blood pressure? Eat healthy: Eat more fresh fruits, vegetables, whole-grain foods, low-fat dairy products, and nuts. Say no to sweets, saturated fats, and excess salt. Exercise: Regular physical activity lowers blood pressure. Atleast 150 minutes of exercise per week is essential. Activities like brisk walking, swimming, cycling or gardening, all count. Reduce stress: Add yoga, meditation, deep breathing. All have proven to lower the blood pressure and keep it normal. Hypertension is usually a chronic life-long condition. It's very essential to take medications, make lifestyle changes and regularly monitor blood pressure. Keeping it under checkwillreducethe potential riskof heart disease, kidney diseases, and stroke.
The earlier yearsSexual concerns experienced during the drastic body changes and feelings of adolescence are often carried into adulthood. Sexual desires are powerful and frequently go beyond the earlier popular forms of sexual expression - kissing, hugging and petting without being aware of the consequences. Anxiety the commonest case of erectile dysfunction is compounded by the present life style - get-togethers, parties, with alcohol and drugs, visits to sex workers or massage parlours which offer other sexual services leading to unplanned, unprotected sex. Consequently seen are unwanted pregnancy, abortions, drug addiction, sexually transmitted diseases, anxiety and depression leading sometimes to suicide. Males seem to have more concerns then females. A common concern is nocturnal emission (night fall, Swapana Dosh) of semen and length of penis. Nocturnal emission of spermatic fluid is falsely believed to weaken a person. Really all that's happening is that excess of sperms is being thrown out to make place for the new ones. The length of the penis troubles many. Young people fall prey to advertisements that claim to lengthen it. The fact of the matter is that a penis an erection of 2.5 wide (10cms) is enough for a sexual intercourse for a person who knows the art to satisfy a partner. Ignorance about masturbation is widely prevalent among males of all ages leading to guilt, anxiety, depression and at times to suicide. Older men erroneously think their cause of erectile dysfunction or premature ejaculation is masturbation. Masturbation is a highly pleasurable act in males. It does not harm the body or exhaust the sperms. In fact it is a safe way to satisfy. Females also masturbate but the percentage to men is much less. They also seem more comfortable with the activity. Masturbation has gone through years of superstition fear of ill effects, considered as a unhealthy practice and considered sin by some religions. Fifty or more years ago doctors and activities thought it caused harm to the body. It is said that corn flakes, the popular breakfast cereal was specifically formulated by Mr. Keleog to help a person not to masturbate. Today thinking has changed. It is now thought that it is an activity that does not cause any harm to the body. It does not finish all the vital sperms over the years so that it will not hinder having children in future. Its wide misuse is common. Persons use it indiscriminatingly when they cannot sleep, when they are tense for e.g. before an examination, some do it more than four to six times a day, which only indicates their immaturity. When done to satisfy a natural sexual urge it is a healthy activity. It keeps the person safe from infection and is said to teach the person skill for sexual intercourse. Technology has helped in many ways but sometimes it creates problems. A person hooked on to porno sites to arouse his desire is found to cause a loss of self confidence conflict with the partner sexual intimacy and intercourse. Before marriage or a partnership both male and female have concerns. Females if they have a previous partner but are getting married to another worry about the husband finding out of their loss of virginity, others worry about the size of their breasts, excessive hair on body or excessive fear of pain at intercourse. Men worry about whether their penis is long enough whether their long standing masturbation will hinder intercourse or prevent them of being a father. The absent hymen a false notion for virginity can be congenitally absent, split by exercise like swimming, cycling etc. or most commonly by masturbation. The hymen therefore is no proof of virginity. Learning to do with what they have making full use of their points and feeling comfortable and proud of their bodies help a lot to overcome the concern. Adopting a safe sex policy is best achieved by masturbation; avoiding sex with an unknown person and multiple partners; during intercourse with sex workers not using condoms every time and being careful of oral sex. Satisfying each other by caressing, hugging, kissing etc. with clothes on is safe; without clothes extra vaginal sex by mutual masturbation is safe with a trusted partner and finally not so safe is vaginal intercourse unless done with a condom correctly worn.
Importance of sex educationOur society is beset with a lot of myths about Human Sexuality and hence the family relationships are affected adversely. A man is considered (mistakenly) as a man only when he performs effectively in bed. In other words a man hangs his self-esteem on his male organ. Hence whenever there is a problem in performing sex, he becomes frustrated and depressed. In order to cover up his inadequacy he may blame his wife for his problems. This attitude will adversely affect the martial relationship, leading to unhappiness in nonsexual aspects of marriage. He may become violent when the wife retaliates. Marital break down, even if not ending in legal separation will be a very messy affair. Sexual behavior is determined by information or knowledge one has on hand and the parameters of comfort zone. Unfortunately we are dealing with a behavior that is besmirched with myths and misconceptions, and a breeding ground for stigmas and taboos, which leads to unhealthy sex life. These barriers have to be broken; otherwise healthy sexual and family life cannot be achieved. It is guesstimated that one in every three couples have some sexual problem or other and they do not know how and where to seek help. The media gives them anonymity and guides them in proper direction. The three main enemies of sexual satisfaction are guilt, anxiety and fear. All these stem from ignorance. Due to the stigmatization sex education is not available. Hence the streets have become not only the libraries for knowledge on sex but also the laboratories. When one of the dimensions (recreation) becomes problematic it impacts the health of the other two dimensions (procreation and relation). Magazine columns endeavor to dispel sexual ignorance and empower people with scientific knowledge. The aim is twofold: First, to inform in simple language, the scientific aspects of sexual problems and clarify myths surrounding sexuality; Second, to help people become comfortable with their own sexual life and elaborate on various treatment options available. People will thus be empowered to take responsibility for their own health and happiness. Have an open mind. All dimensions of human life are important. To consider one as unimportant and attach a stigma will hamper the development of the full potential of an individual. Understanding sexuality will enrich our lives and relationships.
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