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  MEN`S HEALTH MORE
Tips for a smooth shave
Tips for men wanting flat abs
Sunshine for busy executivesMost people working in corporate offices, spend long hours within the confines of concrete buildings. Some business sectors like IT and manufacturing even have their employees working in night shifts. What we don't realize is that, in such a setup, our bodies do not get adequate dosage of sunlight. Lack of exposure to sunlight is responsible for a range of diseases and health conditions. The body requires sunlight just as much it requires food for its nourishment. Long hours of work in glazed business buildings under artificial lighting, deprive the body of this most basic need, thereby creating a deficiency of the vitamin D group. This deficiency then goes on to create several imbalances in the body, and contributes to diseases. Besides these, Vitamin D deficiency can also cause general muscle weakness, muscle and bone aches and pains and osteoporosis, due to the inability to utilize calcium. The best source of Vitamin D is natural sunshine, and that's why it is called the sunshine vitamin. Vitamin D can be had in the supplement form too, but it is still no match for natural sunlight. In a paper titled 'Vitamin D Deficiency' published in The New England Journal, M F Holick writes that, arms and legs should get exposure to sun for 10-15 minutes every day. "The amount of vitamin D produced depends on the intensity of the UVB in the sun and many other factors. Darker-skinned individuals may need 5-10 times more exposure than a fair-skinned person, in order to make the same amount of vitamin D." Tap that sunlight Early morning is the best time to get out in the sun. There's no better time to get that walk, than in the morning. Park your car a little away from the office building if possible, and walk to your office in the sun. When you take a tea break in the evening, head outside, instead of going to the in-house cafeteria.
Strict parenting: When enough is enoughThe strict or authoritative style of parenting is where the parents hold their children's lives over a tight leash. Strict parents are high in control and low in nurturing qualities. They set high standards for all activities and expect strict obedience to the rules set by them. However, these parents display little or no warmth and affection. They love and affection they offer is also conditional love based on obedience and performance. Children of authoritarian parents turn out to be obedient, but this obedience is based on fear. Such parents very often use shame and guilt to make their children change their behaviour. They don't encourage verbal give-and-take and expect their orders to be obeyed without question. The children brought up in such a way are initially very obedient and polite but later all the suppressed emotions find an outlet. More often than not, such children end up being aggressive and tend to be bullies at school. Research shows that fathers who are extremely strict with their sons end up making their sons violent and aggressive, or indulge in non-physical aggressiveness like name calling. Strictly raised children have difficulty relating to their peer group. They either end up being aggressive or completely timid and submissive. At school teachers rate them as less socially competent, average or poor at studies and extra-curricular activities. They are also less accepted by their friends. The school dropout rates in such children are very high. Studies conducted on such dropouts revealed that they suffered from a huge inferiority complex and low self-esteem. Strict parenting can cause several problems in adolescence too. Children who are dominated by their parents are often found breaking the law. Alcohol and drug abuse rates are high in such children. Psychologically, these children are usually poor decision makers. Having had their parents make decisions for them all their lives, they find it very difficult to take a stand. They end up being indecisive. At the workplace too, they lack the competency to take up initiatives or show the lead. They make better team members than team leaders. Even if presented with an opportunity, they are likely to shy away from responsibility as they feel inferior and lack the requisite courage. Strict parenting can have a negative impact on the child's weight too. Studies show that an overly strict upbringing has a negative impact on weight because the children often fail to learn to eat on the basis of hunger and satiety. In such families parents use food as a reward, insist that children clean their plates, or restrict the kind or amount of food a child can eat. The studies showed that the children of authoritarian mothers were nearly five times as likely to be overweight compared to their counterparts!
  WOMEN`S HEALTH MORE
Women and gynecology issues: Know the facts
10 Hair secrets
The post-delivery bluesA baby being born is cause for celebration. Especially in a country like India, where the family ties tend to be close, there is a festive atmosphere at home. However, sometimes the mothers may not share the same enthusiasm. This wave of negative emotions in the middle of what is clearly a happy occasion can be confusing for the new mother. Interestingly these feelings are not abnormal, as many new moms face postpartum depression, which is also called baby blues. It is an emotional reaction that begins a few days after delivery and lasts not more than 2 weeks. What are the symptoms of postpartum depression? Feelings of anger or irritability. Lack of interest in the baby. Lack of appetite and sleep disturbance. Crying and sadness. Irritability or hypersensitivity. Feelings of guilt, shame or hopelessness. Loss of interest, joy or pleasure in the things you used to enjoy. Possible thoughts of harming the baby or yourself. What are the causes of postpartum depression? Postpartum depression can occur due to a combination of factors. Hormonal changes: Changes in the level of hormones can leave you feeling tired, sluggish and depressed. Changes in your blood volume, blood pressure, immune system and metabolism can contribute to fatigue and mood swings. Emotional factors: Feeling overwhelmed with the new arrival in the family, and taking care of the baby day and night, may leave you sleep deprived, overexerted, and anxious. New mothers also feel that they look less attractive after pregnancy. You may feel that people around you are concerned with the baby more than you, and that you are being neglected. All these emotional factors may lead to postpartum depression. Other factors: Issues like breast feeding, financial strain, and relationship troubles can also contribute to postpartum depression. How does one deal with postpartum depression? Take complete rest and sleep for sufficient hours Spend quality time with your husband Go for healthy diet Take morning or evening walk for fresh air Try to follow yoga or other exercises Share your feelings with your husband or friends Do not overexert Join some groups for new moms Go for individual therapy or counsellors Remember, postpartum depression is not an incurable problem. It is just a temporary state of mind, which can be overcome if you are sufficiently aware of the problem.                
Honeymoon cystitisHoneymoon cystitis is a term for urinary tract infections that occur commonly during early marriage. Sexual intercourse is the primary reason for developing this infection. The infection occurs when the E. coli bacteria that are normally present in the bowel are introduced into the urethra. This may happen through sexual intercourse, inserting unclean fingers or objects into the vagina. Women who wash their private parts from the back to front also have an increased chance of developing infection. Symptoms of honeymoon cystitis may include a burning or painful sensation during urination, the urge to urinate frequently, cloudy urine, blood-tinged urine, and/or pain above the pubic bone. Any of these is enough o play a spoilsport and dampen your honeymoon mood! Symptoms of honeymoon cystitis generally emerge within a day or two after bacteria are introduced into the urethra. A physician can confirm the diagnosis of infection through a simple urine test. The treatment usually involves antibiotics and pain-killers. What care should you take to avoid honeymoon cystitis from recurring? Use water based lubricant during sexual intercourse Urinate before and immediately after intercourse to flush out the bacteria from the urethra. Drink plenty of water to keep the urine normal Avoid coffee, tea and aerated drinks See a gynaecologist or a urologist if the problem recurs.  Urinary tract infections are extremely common in women and are the leading cause for visits to the doctor.
  KIDS CARE MORE
Help your teenage boy make a smooth change
5 Ideas to make reading fun for your kids
LBW - Babies that don't throw too much weight around!You'll hear this term if your baby weighs less than 2.5 kg (5.5 lb) when born. About six in 100 babies who are born in the UK have a low birth weight. There are a number of reasons for LBW in babies, with premature birth topping the list as far as reasons go. Babies born prematurely could have extremely low birth weight as compared to babies that are born between the natural term of pregnancy, i.e., between 36-40 weeks. So what are the other reasons behind LBW babies? Descent is an important factor that could also determine birth weight. A survey conducted in the UK showed that children born to people from the Indian sub-continent (Indian, Pakistani, or Bangladeshi) or African parents are more likely to be born with LBW as compared to babies born of white Caucasians. In case of twins or triplets, there are chances that one or all offspring might have LBW due to lack of space in the womb. The mother's health would largely determine the healthy weight of the child as well. Emotional problems faced by the mother during pregnancy could have a link with LBW. Same goes for addictions like smoking, alcohol abuse, designer drugs, and at times, health conditions like high blood pressure which cuts off healthy blood supply to the fetus. Even damage to the placenta can cause LBW, as the fetus does not receive vital nutrients, blood, and oxygen which can cause stunted growth or low weight at birth. Any congenital or hereditary conditions can also affect the baby's weight. There is much uncertainty with regard to the future of a baby with low birth weight. There have been instances where LBW babies have developed conditions like obesity, diabetes, or heart disease in later years. It is a common fear that LBW babies develop behavioral or emotional problems in schooling years and they are likely to have low intelligence. Of course, there isn't any concrete evidence. The pivotal factors here would be to find the cause for LBW and what trimester of pregnancy was it detected. Providing a stable family environment and taking special care of a LBW baby can also go a long way in keeping it healthy in subsequent years. Not to forget that the parents' size and genetic predisposition would have a lot to do with the baby's health and even weight. If the parents are small in size or underweight, then the chances are that the baby will be born small or with LBW. Breastfeeding the baby is the best strategy that a mother can adopt to ensure that the baby grows up well. While growing up, the parents will have to ensure that the baby receives a balanced nutritious diet to ensure healthy weight.
Bedwetting in children: Causes and treatmentBed wetting or nocturnal enuresis is very common in childhood. Bladder control is achieved in children by the age of 4 years. Night-time bladder control takes longer in some children and is achieved between 5 to7 years of age. Delayed bladder maturation in some kids, history of nocturnal enuresis in children, hormonal problems (reduced vasopressin), deep sleep and emotional problems in kids are some of the problems. Constipation and irregular bowel movements can also be the cause in some kids and it should be reported to the physician immediately. Bed wetting should be dealt with using motivational therapy, bladder training, fluid management, behavioural alarms and sometimes medications. Child's willingnessand ability to participate in the treatment and counselling is important. Motivating kid and parents in important. Treatment can be lengthy. Here are a few simple tips to get rid of bedwetting: Cut down a kid's water intake or other liquids few hours before going to bed. Inculcate habit of going to the loo to pee before he/she goes to sleep. Wake the child up from sleep once during night-time, if required, to empty bladder. Ensure to keep the child warm. Use warm clothing. Cold temperature increases urge and frequency of urination. Try using diapers to reduce the kid's embarrassment.
  MENTAL HEALTH MORE
Nutrients for mind and body
Meditation - A perfect way for mental hygiene
Algophobia: The fear of painAlgophobia is the fear of pain:  an abnormal and consistent feeling that is far beyond what would be considered normal. The term is derived from the Greek words, Algos meaning pain and Phobos meaning fear. Our bodies are designed in a way that when there is a painful stimulus it reacts. How the body reacts to the pain is an individualistic phenomenon. Some people have a very low threshold for pain, and even the slightest pain evokes a huge response in them. Where as others can withstand a good amount of physical pain before their bodies give in. Some people dread even the tiniest amount of pain. They foresee situations that will cause pain in them. The way they react to even the smallest amount of pain is far more than the normal level of acceptance. Such people are said to be suffering from Algophobia. Algophobia is a learned behaviour, say behavioral psychologists. For example you may have heard from several people how hitting your shin on the furniture in the dark is the worst possible pain ever. So you tend to keep a watch and if it is dark, you move around extra-carefully to avoid bumping into the furniture and getting hurt. This would be considered normal, cautious behaviour. But if the same thought keeps buzzing in your head continuously and you go to extreme lengths to avoid that pain, you could be algophobic. Old people are the ones who have excessive fear. The age factor along with fear of death plays a vital role in old people developing this fear. For example an old lady may hear about all the ailments and pains that afflict old age people and may become apprehensive about it. She may develop irrational fears that more often than not, are also imaginary. She may start experiencing the pains even before anything actually happens to her. It may seem unrealistic to a normal person, but for algophobics pain can be a severely dreaded thing. Therefore they will go to great lengths to avoid pain at all levels, including day-to-day activities. They will not go into the dark, handle tools, avoid lifting heavy objects or even avoid playing any type of contact sports. If a task has a scope for injury and pain, they will avoid it! Frequently a pathological complaint of Hyperalgesia occurs along with algophobia. Hyperalgesia is a condition of increased sensitivity to pain due to damage to the peripheral nerves and pain receptors. Pain in such cases may be directly in the damaged tissues or in the surrounding areas. An interesting fact is that hyperalgesia can occur due to long term use of painkillers especially strong ones like opium and its derivatives. Algophobia is treated with behavioural therapy, psychotherapy and anti-anxiety medications. Hypnotherapy also has shown beneficial effects.  
Cleanliness - A clean body, clean mindPhysical Benefits: Killing of Germs: Disinfecting your living area allows negligible scope for breeding and spreading of germs and bacteria. Though not visible to your eyes, many of these can cause severe illnesses. Prevention of Food Contamination: Clean cooking utensils and counter tops allow for low risk for contamination of food. The parts of the utensils which have come in contact with fish, raw meat, or eggs are recommended to be washed with hot water and soap. Make sure you wash your hands to avoid spreading of any bacteria in your house.  Keeps Illnesses and Allergies at Bay: Many allergies could be caused due to dirty mattresses, carpets, sheets, walls, and furniture. In order to keep away mold, dust mites, cobwebs, and mildew, make sure you dust, mop, and vacuum the house on a regular basis. The sheets should be washed at least once a week with hot water and detergent. Floors and walls, wardrobes, and refrigerator should be cleaned using disinfectant sprays up to 2 to 3 times per month. Thoroughly clean your carpet and upholstery at regular intervals. Psychological Benefits: Association of Non-Cleanliness with Moral Lapse: In a review by Current Directions in Psychological Science, it has been found that physical cleanliness does not only physically benefit a being, it also results in weighing the person on a moral radar. When we perceive a physical contamination, we respond in the same way as we would in case of an act of moral disobedience. This response includes repulsion and disgust accompanied by their behavioural components like scowling and frowning. Sense of Accomplishment: Those who clean their house and living space have been found to have a consequent sense of accomplishment that adds to the way one feels about oneself. Clarity and Organization of Thoughts: It has been discovered that those living in a clean and neat environment tend to have a greater capacity to think than those who live in a messy and unclean atmosphere. Proactive Sanitation Teaching for Children: Start with your own home. A child emulates its parents, and if the parents practice cleanliness as part of their lives, children would notice and follow suit. Children tend to connect who they are with their home environment and as they grow up they ensure that such a cleanliness of their world around is maintained.  towards their immediate surroundings, thus ensuring that they do not contribute towards pollution and environmental degradation, at least on an individual level.
  BEAUTY AND FITNESS MORE
Causes and modes of transmission of AIDS
Complete acne care guide - Why, what, and how?
5 cardinal sins for the skinWhile cigarettes may not constitute food in the strictest sense, it does have a profound effect on skin complexion, health, color and tone. We eat that we may live, but sometimes we eat way too much and consume stuff that may be extremely hazardous to our health. Since we are talking about skin, here are 5 most hazardous foods for your skin: Grease adds to the crease Since healthy skin is all about healthy blood circulation, any food which is likely to clog up the blood vessels internally is deemed bad for skin tone. Packaged snacks like potato chips may have edible oil written in bold but this contributes significantly to the slowing down of 'collagen and elastin syntheses' which in turn causes the skin to appear aged and all wrinkly. The french fries that we consume as a TV snack can also cause an acne outbreak on the skin and face. Gluten Glutton Gluten is a substance found in wheat and other food grains. We may not even be aware that some of the food grains have gluten as a main constituent. Gluten intolerance can also cause inflammations on the skin in the form of rashes or acne. Bad news is that the pizzas, pastas, cakes and bread that we get off the rack may be heavy in gluten (Surprised that they don't say that on the pack) and that may be the reason for you to lose precious skin tone. So seek gluten free foods, though that might not be the easiest of tasks, but for your skin, it certainly will be worth it. Caffeine - the skin coffin If you are one of those coffee addicts then you may as well write an obituary column lamenting the loss of your skin tone and complexion. It's not without reason that health freaks love bashing coffee beans and caffeine rich beverages, as they are truly hazardous. How? Studies have proven that just 2-3 cups stimulate pituitary-adrenocortical response. Yes, but what does that have to do with your skin? Well this leads to the hormone cortisol to increase in our bodies. Cortisol is known as the stress hormone! So now here's what it does to your skin -it accelerates the ageing process which means wrinkled skin and causes dehydration causing the skin to show an unusual pallor. So before you turn the coffee faucet on think twice. Fad to Black How fad diets are not skin friendly? Some people go on a high protein, low-carb diet which could sound the death knell as far as complexion goes. Dieting depletes calcium levels, which means your bones are going to suffer and what's the point of having skin on bad bone density? Besides low-carb diets can utterly wreck the complexion as the delicate PH balance in the skin is ruined. Some of the meat, poultry and dairy products too can have artificial chemicals injected in them which cause a hormonal imbalance in our bodies leading to skin disasters. Fruits and vegetables have chemicals injected too sometimes! Beware! Cereal Killers Cereal killers are those people who ignore the need of a proper diet for skin health. So anybody who indulges in too much sugar, caffeine and greasy food stuffs is a 'Cereal Killer' A lack of cereals in the diet can literally kill your skin. Cereal foods have high fiber and antioxidants for moisturizing the skin and protecting it from skin damage. For great skin other than cereals which are simply fabulous for keeping skin hydrated and breathing easily, one can eat fruits, olive oil, healthy fats, almonds, tofu, grains, nuts and the good old vitamin B rich products. Ceramides in raw food diets, organic foods, wheat germ and brown rice protect the epidermis of the skin and make it impervious to external attacks and pollutants while maintaining their tone and beauty.
Sunburn: Overview and treatmentSunburns could also be accompanied by allergic responses to medicines, exposure to sun and sunscreen products, sight-related issues like reduced or complete loss of vision, as well as heatstroke. Over a long period of time, frequent cases of sunburn can result in cold sores, cataracts, skin cancer, and lupus.  The factors which will decide the vulnerability to sunburns are: Type of skin - The type of skin determines the vulnerability and intensity of the sunburn. The most vulnerable groups are those with freckled and fair skin as well with blonde or red hair. Regardless of the color of the skin, all skin types are vulnerable to skin cancer and proper sun protection must be used during times of sun exposure. Season - Summer days carry with them a higher probability of burning the skin. UV Index - This refers to the forecast of the strength of UV light on a particular day. This will let you know the cautionary measures you need to take in order to avoid skin damage. This is put forward on a scale of 0 to 11+ with 0 being the lowest exposure. Latitude - As you move to locations closer to the equator, the sunlight directly passes through the atmosphere to a greater extent. Age - Those who are younger than 6 years of age and those over 60 years are at a greater risk of getting sunburns. Altitude - As you climb higher and higher, the chances of sunburn are also greater since the amount of Earth's atmosphere to keep away the sunlight reduces. Every elevation of approximately 1000 feet, the UV exposure is amplified by about 4%. Location - If you are close to reflective surfaces like snow, water, ice, concrete and white sand, rays of the sun which get reflected off these might harm you. Time of the day - The rays of the sun are strongest between 10 in the morning and 4 in the evening. Though, the probability of getting sunburn are lower on cloudy days, it is possible for the UV rays of the sun to pass through the clouds and negatively affect your skin health. Here are the precautionary steps you can take to avoid getting sunburn: Avoid staying in the sun for a long period of time. Make use of sunscreen and choose clothing which cover your skin. In case you are suffering from sunburn, here are ways to treat it: An over-the-counter pain reliever: In order to lower the inflammation and relieve pain, use ibuprofen or aspirin. Anti-inflammatory condiment: Cortisone cream and aloe vera are two primary ways of reducing the inflammation. Cool bath: Take bath for about 10-20 minutes in water of cool temperature (make sure the water is not too cold). This will cut back the pain and irritation in affected area.  Do not use any bath oil, soap or detergent as this might increase the chances of allergic reactions and irritation to the injury. When drying yourself after the bath, do not rub with towel. Cold compressions: Try application of cold and wet compressions on the concerned region for about 20-30 minutes. Adequate hydration: Make sure you drink at least 8-12 glasses of water to help your skin to recover from the sun damage. Moisturizer: Once your skin begins to heal, use a gentle moisturizer without any scent. Blister treatment: In case you have blisters, do not try to pop them. This will lead to infection and marks.However, if you have large blisters which require to be drained, then pop them using a sterilized needle. Follow this by cleaning the area dry with gauze. After applying ointment to the area (Aloe vera or antibiotic ones like bacitracin and polymyxin B), wrap the area loosely using a gauze bandage. Make sure you do not tie it tightly and change the gauze daily to avoid infection. Medical attention: In case you feel nauseous along with fever, rashes and chills, then make a visit to the doctor. The following symptoms also require you to seek medical attention immediately: Pain in eyes with sensitivity to light, dizziness, high thirst without proper urination, painful blisters, and pale/cool skin.
  LIFESTYLE PROBLEMS MORE
7 tips for a healthy heart
Dizziness
7 Pains you should not ignoreWhen the body cries out in pain, most of the times, you know what is bringing that pain, and you do what will help relieve the pain. For example, a serious workout may cause sore aching muscles, for which you will rest a day or two, or take a painkiller. What does one do to know why a body part is paining? One needs to sit up and take notice! The pain could be anything, from a heart attack, to an aneurysm, and could cost you your life! Pain in the head: Headaches are the most frequent pains that we suffer from. Headache could be due to a migraine, due to staying too long in the sun, due to a cold, or simply due to working too long without a break. However, in case you have a headache, and are not able to pinpoint to an obvious cause, rush to the emergency room. Headaches with no apparent cause may be due to a brain hemorrhage, a tumor in the brain, or an aneurysm in the brain arteries! Get yourself checked as soon as possible, if you keep getting headaches for no apparent reason. Pain in the jaw: This could be due to a caries ridden tooth. But most often it is due to an impending heart attack. The classical left sided chest pain radiating to the left little finger is not always seen in all cases of heart attacks. Pains to the jaw and the back are reported very frequently. Often, people tend to take the pain in the jaw lightly, and brush it off to a tooth problem. This may be potentially life threatening, as you never know the severity of the attack! Tingling, numbness and burning of the feet: Diabetes mellitus is a silent killer. Peripheral neuropathy is often the first complication of diabetes. Tingling numbness, and burning in the feet may be attributed to wearing tight shoes and to keeping your feet suffocated in socks all day long. Dipping your feet in a tub of cold water will give you a good night's sleep. But do not let it go at that. Get your blood sugar levels checked before it is too late! Pain in the calves: Do you get nightly pain in your calves that get better with putting your feet up? This is due to long standing hours at workplace, you may say. True, it is due to that. But, it is not something to be left unattended. Calf pains are due to deep vein thrombosis that occurs when the stagnated blood in the veins starts to form clots. The danger here is that the clot could break off and travel to your lungs causing pulmonary thromboembolism that is fatal! Take a break regularly and put up your feet frequently. Let the blood flow and not stagnate! Pain in the back: Most commonly, back pain is caused due to arthritis, and improper sitting postures. But if you suffer from high blood pressure, and are an alcoholic and smoker too, do not take your back pain lightly. It could be due to a heart attack or an aortic dissection! Pain in the abdomen: You may attribute this pain to gases, over eating or indigestion. While these may be occasional causes, persistent pains need to be checked. It could be anything from a gall stone, to gastric ulcers, to a swollen liver, or maybe even pancreatic cancer! Vague, medically inexplicable pains: When you have a recurrent headache or a stomach ache or a backache and you come out with a 'perfectly healthy' report after visiting all the specialists, it is perhaps time to seek the help of a psychiatrist or a counsellor. Your pains could actually be a symptom of depression. Psychosomatic pains are on the rise. The stresses we face in our lives everyday get pushed to our subconscious, and eventually are pushed up bodily in the form of unexplained aches and pains!
A ready reckoner on obesityObesity is a condition of excessive accumulation of body fat to the point that it has adverse effects on health. People with body mass index (BMI) more than  30% are considered as obese. Indians are turning obese at an alarming rate and obesity has spiked epidemic levels in India. The causes of obesity are: Lack of exercise and low level of physical activity. Irregular and improper eating habits.  Eating a lot of junk food, high calorie food, that too, at wrong timings. Emotional factors like stress and depression. Hormonal imbalances and disorders like polycystic ovarian disease. Genetic disorders. The symptoms of obesity are: Low energy levels Shortness of  breath Disinterest in physical activities Pain in the back and joints. Obesity can lead to: Gout Hypertension Diabetes Heart diseases Sleep apnea - Breathing problems while sleeping Arthritis High cholesterol levels Obesity can be dealt with by taking following steps: Eat less and exercise more Adapt to healthy food and eating habits Avoid sedentary life; incorporate some physical activity in the daily routine Treatment of medical conditions responsible for obesity like hormonal imbalances, polycystic ovarian disease, and depression Surgeries like liposuction So ascertain your ideal weight as per Body Mass Index, and start working towards achieving it.
  Sexual Health MORE
Dealing with senior sex problems
15 Fun facts about sex you surely don\'t know!
Is sex linked to self esteem?Man is a curious creature, full of quirks and contradictions. Sexual intercourse, something that most people consider an intimate and private experience, is spoken about in hushed tones and often, with some discomfort. We don't reveal or talk about our sexual desires, as readily we discuss our salary packages or food habits. This is quite ironic seeing how sex is an important gauge for a person's self esteem and also an indicator of his/her social desirability. The very thing that we do under covers, we somehow choose to "keep under cover". The Link between Sex and Self Esteem: Self esteem is an important factor that determines the mental & physical well-being of an individual. All of us have a craving to be understood, liked and appreciated; and these form the equivalent of our basic needs on the inverted pyramid- Food, clothing and shelter. For a human being to flourish and prosper, consumable food, without the mental food of appreciation, is not enough; and sexual intercourse or an intimacy with the opposite sex, is one way of validating that need. Sex therefore, ceases to be just a physical need instilled by nature for the perpetuation of the species, but goes into the larger emotional cum psychological dimension of self actualization and realization. Though some of us might be embarrassed to broach the topic of 'whether or not we are getting enough', the truth is that every human seeks to achieve his sexual potential, even while he or she might, not be aware of it. Most of us have the ability to get the foods matching our taste preferences onto our plates, but with sex, this could be a little difficult, since sex, is a complex subject with a lot of social, moral and religious links. The truth is evident in the number of marriages (the very cornerstones of civil society) that fail on the basis of sexual compatibility, either by setting unrealistic sexual expectations or by not owning up to, or even identifying, one's sexual needs. This has repercussions on the psyche and self-esteem of a person, and this is especially true in the case of men in particular, as they may feel completely inferior for not being able to attract a sexual partner matching his desires. In some people, this also leads to a case of self-loathing, for having sexual needs which a partner doesn't understand, or much worse, needs which are considered taboo and sinful (Homosexuality, Anal Sex, Group Sex, Fetishes, etc.) These complex emotions can wreak  havoc on a person's self-esteem, by creating severe internal conflicts and serious self-doubts. Now socially, sex can either liberate a person, or hold him prisoner. At times, the unfulfilled needs may get repressed and banished to the shadows, only to be played out later, in the form of sexual adventurism and crime. Just one look at the sexual crimes in our society today, and we can clearly understand just how healthy our collective self esteem is! The very society that frowns upon prostitution, is actually responsible for creating it, though everybody would like to pretend otherwise. The crux of the matter is that "sex" and "self esteem" are closely related; and one should not shy away from addressing any issues one might face regarding one's sexuality. Physical love is necessary for the survival of a relationship and one needs to make time and efforts to successfully create one's own sexual space. The positive effects of a good sex life can be seen in an increased work productivity, fewer illnesses and an increase in one's overall efficiency. Some people are haunted by sexual guilt and confusion and when they keep it all locked up, they suffer from unexplained physical pains and feel 'down in the dumps' mentally. Another problem with appreciation from the opposite sex, is the addiction to  external validation. Some people feel utterly worthless until they receive positive feedback about their looks or abilities on a regular basis. This can be downright devastating, as in these cases, there is a great dependence on external factors for one to feel good. While no one denies the "feel good factor" of sexual appreciation, it is up to each one of us, to decide just how much of control one must be giving to external factors, to determine our personal self-esteem. The appreciation may be theirs, but the esteem is entirely of the self and only the self can decide how much of appreciation and sex is enough.
Work woes - The sexual problems of busy peopleThat one day Mr. X took half a day off and sneaked into his house to surprise his wife, he found her not tending to the garden, but attending to Mr.XXX, the neighbor! Long after the echoes of the shotgun had died down and way after Mr. XXX hopped off, holding on to dear life with trousers around his ankles, Mr. X was found asking himself loudly - why me? Though this story does bring about some amusement, it really isn't amusing to know a whole lot of relationships just going bust all because of the sex word and deed. Couples today are busier than ever, and after the initial euphoria of the relationship wears off; work, career advancements, salary packages get more precedence. Relationships start going off into the realm of a comfort zone where physical touch, intimacy, and sex take a back seat as most people think - "there will be a lot of time for that later." However, time and tide wait for no one- not even bright career enthusiasts, who put their careers over their relationships, only to wake up one day to see their love gone wrong! This is not to say that careers and hefty pay packages and promotions are not important. After all, we can rightly hear one say, "One cannot survive by love and fresh air alone." However, just as it is compulsory to swipe your card at the office door, couples have to ensure that they save some swiping for the bedroom as well. Easier said than done? Perhaps! Here are some of the typical problems that plague the love life of busy people : We have a relationship, why do we need sex? That may be just one partner's opinion! A man who thinks for two and loves for two is going to be in for a nasty surprise at some point. Sure, work pressure will always be there and so will conference calls and decision making. So, if you think your partner is going to live by the memories of your last intimate encounter, you need to get a reality check. Sure, your partner will probably understand that you are busy and maybe the fault is not entirely yours- maybe she is busy too! Sooner or later, you will have to figure out whether you are just flat mates or a real couple. And a real couple does things together- laughs, meets, makes love, fights, makes up, and all that! A good sex life only reinforces the emotional bond between couples and takes the relationship to another level. Going purely by sexual intercourse, then yes, sexual intercourse is, of course, healthy and has a lot of physiological benefits to offer like reduction of pain and feel-good endorphins. Some of us might just take only that bit and have sex with the first available person in sight! The point is sex within the framework of a relationship, can give better results and can foster strong ties, but the guilt from cheating on your partner can also add another reason for stress, which considering your already busy life, could well be the final straw that broke the camel's back. We do have an annual vacation, don't we? Sure! Timeshare holidays and stock options can make the best of vacation places easily accessible. So, the deal is - take your annual vacation abroad and stop groaning! What if you were paid just once a year or were allowed to eat just once a week? Would make you feel really great, right? Relationships need more than your annual vacation. Even a regular walk in the morning together is a better idea than a vacation on a cruise liner. In our material aspirations, we forget that good things in life are completely free. If only you weren't so brand conscious, you would've seen them right away. So, don't save all that sex up for the annual vacation; a weekend getaway will, in fact, add more spunk to your life. Thinking of you! Even the thought that one is in someone's thoughts can be so warm and bring out the best in a person. People who have a partner waving them off when they set off to work are generally happy and more productive at the workplace and have fewer disagreements or upsets. So, imagine the good luck charm being quadrupled by lovemaking! Call it stolen moments of passion. Take a chance... you might just be a little late for work, but then this is important business too! Be spontaneous and watch your partner respond to your sense of urgency. If that's not possible, then at least send a "thinking of you" message, or if you are more creative, you can personalize it with your brand of naughtiness and raunchiness. Rest assured, this will help you actually find the time to make love on a regular basis and your girl might even find a new you and actually miss you when you are gone. Shift workers: Don't shift the blame...shift the time to make love. The tragedy of these times is when both people are out working and both are extremely ambitious and both work different shifts. He is dead tired when she is all up and chirpy. It is night for one, daytime for the other! Wow, what a predicament to be in! One weary soul bone tired and hardly in the mood for love making! Who says you have to go all the way every day. Even touch therapy can be extremely enchanting, healing, invigorating, and can eventually lead to sex. Imagine a hand that caresses your brow as you crib about your boss's bitchiness or the conference that you have been given single handedly to handle? A kiss exchanged at the right time can sometimes do way with the sex part if you are too tired for it. Important thing is to wake up in your lover's arms rather than wake up too late to the fact that you have no love life. This can be a beautiful experience and you can exchange places, giving your partner a sensual body massage when she comes back from her shift. Making love, for sure, is important, but what is more important is keeping the love alive for the making of it!
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