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Aging milestonesChanges in old age depends on attitude as much as person to person. In young old age some changes begin to take place in a person’s appearance. Wrinkles, warts, age spots begin to form on the body. Hair begins to thin or becomes grey and even height lessens because the bone density decreases. While in ‘old‘ old age these changes are already permanent. Men might look distinguished if in good health, but women all look grandmotherly. In ‘young’ old age, cells begin to decay and muscle mass declines and immunity is no longer as strong as it used to be. People lose energy as the age progresses.  ‘Old’ old age brings in a lot of physical decline, profound changes in appearance and motor abilities, as also in sensation. Skin gets less elastic and becomes thin and blood vessels can break under the skin. The senses also begin to become dull. Eye lenses get affected and color perception and reading ability becomes very low. Hearing loss may lead to paranoia and ‘old’ old age people begin to think everyone is plotting against them because they can’t hear properly about what others are saying. Sense of smell also declines, but the taste remains almost intact. In ‘young’ old age, reflexes also slow down and so do the motor abilities. By the time they reach ‘old‘ old age most adults find that their response time has become quite reduced. This can be seen most in driving situations where it is difficult for ‘old‘ old aged adults to operate their vehicles as they have poor spontaneous responses. The ‘young’ old adults do not lose as much of their motor abilities as the ‘old‘ old adults, especially when holding small things like needles and pins. Of course, there are changes in sexuality and there may be a decline in the ability to have sex as men may not have an erection and women become dry due to lack of female hormones. Cognitive decline in 40% to 60% of older adults can be arrested with remedial training. Despite all the changes, most people even in their 70s remain comparatively active if they do not suffer any illness. Mental, physical, and social activity is necessary to maintain the quality of life. Old people begin to withdraw from work and other important roles and allow the younger people to take over. They are a lot happier as is also advised in Vedic literature as vridhashram. While activities are important, disengagement is equally important. Memory loss becomes aggravated and other cognitive abilities begin to decline and there are many ‘old‘ old adults who get Alzheimer’s and lose the ability to look after themselves. Old people also dwell on questions of death and sometimes go through a phase of denial and then anger that they have so little time left. Acceptance of death comes, but after a struggle and the idea of losing the family saddens them. Old people require support in their declining years as they begin to lose their faculties.
Perfect partners in crime - Midlife crisis and dementiaThe responses we have to common stressful events in our daily lives have a lasting impact on our brain structure. The effects of a stressful event last a very long time, though apparently we seem to have recovered from it. Researchers say that the stress hormones keep circulating in our body long after the stress has passed. According to a recent Swedish research study, our response to common life events may trigger long-lasting physiological changes in the brain. These interestingly shocking findings come from the Prospective Population Study of Women in Gothenburg, a long term study on 800 women that lasted for almost forty years. The women who were a part of this study were all born before 1930, and underwent regular neuropsychiatric tests. The study started in 1968 assessed women for any baseline stressors like workplace problems, widowhood, alcoholism and illness in the family. Women who had serious issues at the start of the study had a 21% higher risk of developing Alzheimer's Disease and 15% higher risk of developing dementia later on in life. Interestingly, having to take care of a mentally ill family member like a sibling or mother, was found to be a major cause for development of dementia later on in life. The findings of this study show that accumulated stress from common life events has severe physiological and psychological consequences. These physiological consequences include adverse effects on the central nervous, cardiovascular and endocrine and immune systems. There have been several studies that state that the effects of stressful events like earthquakes, cyclones and floods can have a lasting impact on life and often shape the person's personality. What makes this study interesting is its finding that daily stressors accumulated over a period of time and often left unresolved, have a lasting impact that shows up in later stages of life!
Your child is ready for school... but are you?It was still okay. Just 2-3 hours which you could utilize for other things while your child was away briefly. Now you will have to compete along with teachers, textbooks and homework for your child's attention. Well Mother, we know this is going to be difficult for you, but let's see if we can try and make it any easier. Think of school as an extension of the tender loving care that you provided. The only difference is that the TLC will go towards nurturing and developing his/her brain and help it learn important skills which will help gain a balanced development. At this point your child feels bad and completely unsafe in this new hostile world of teachers and uniforms and what not! If you weaken at this point your child will cop on and then will come the emotional blackmail. So explain the importance of school to your child as it will make the transition easier. It is always good for mothers to accompany their children to school but imagine watching mother walk away and all hell can break loose. So if your child's school has a school bus facility you can walk him to the bus stop and then say your goodbyes there. A lump in the throat at the bus stop is preferable any day than a scene at school with a child holding on to mother for dear life. Do not criticize your child's school or assignments given by them as children can catch on quite quickly and that can be reason enough for them not to concentrate on school activities. Always encourage your child to talk about what he did at school and ask him questions about his friends and teachers. This gives the impression that school is as important as home and gradually even you will reconcile yourself to the fact that school is here to stay.
LBW - Babies that don't throw too much weight around!You'll hear this term if your baby weighs less than 2.5 kg (5.5 lb) when born. About six in 100 babies who are born in the UK have a low birth weight. There are a number of reasons for LBW in babies, with premature birth topping the list as far as reasons go. Babies born prematurely could have extremely low birth weight as compared to babies that are born between the natural term of pregnancy, i.e., between 36-40 weeks. So what are the other reasons behind LBW babies? Descent is an important factor that could also determine birth weight. A survey conducted in the UK showed that children born to people from the Indian sub-continent (Indian, Pakistani, or Bangladeshi) or African parents are more likely to be born with LBW as compared to babies born of white Caucasians. In case of twins or triplets, there are chances that one or all offspring might have LBW due to lack of space in the womb. The mother's health would largely determine the healthy weight of the child as well. Emotional problems faced by the mother during pregnancy could have a link with LBW. Same goes for addictions like smoking, alcohol abuse, designer drugs, and at times, health conditions like high blood pressure which cuts off healthy blood supply to the fetus. Even damage to the placenta can cause LBW, as the fetus does not receive vital nutrients, blood, and oxygen which can cause stunted growth or low weight at birth. Any congenital or hereditary conditions can also affect the baby's weight. There is much uncertainty with regard to the future of a baby with low birth weight. There have been instances where LBW babies have developed conditions like obesity, diabetes, or heart disease in later years. It is a common fear that LBW babies develop behavioral or emotional problems in schooling years and they are likely to have low intelligence. Of course, there isn't any concrete evidence. The pivotal factors here would be to find the cause for LBW and what trimester of pregnancy was it detected. Providing a stable family environment and taking special care of a LBW baby can also go a long way in keeping it healthy in subsequent years. Not to forget that the parents' size and genetic predisposition would have a lot to do with the baby's health and even weight. If the parents are small in size or underweight, then the chances are that the baby will be born small or with LBW. Breastfeeding the baby is the best strategy that a mother can adopt to ensure that the baby grows up well. While growing up, the parents will have to ensure that the baby receives a balanced nutritious diet to ensure healthy weight.
Balancing marriage and work: The top 5 tricksFor women juggling between home and work is very difficult. Yet, the number of women choosing to go out and work, while managing their homes, has increased over the years. This is because a successful career helps a woman establish her identity in society, gain respect and do justice to her inherent qualities, passions and dreams. So, a successful working woman, is a happy woman and statistics show that such women also keep their kids and spouses happy. More stable marriages During the seventies, when women started entering the workforce in large numbers, there was an instant rise in the divorce rates. However, over the past decade, the divorce rates among working couples have actually declined. Today, men have extensively adjusted to the idea of having a working woman, as a partner. In many countries, men actually share the domestic chores and devote time to childcare, so that their women can successfully handle both, work and home. However, the main responsibility of the home and the kids is still primarily, in the hands of the women. Here are the six keys to manage your work and marriage successfully: Find the right job You can ease out the stress of managing the work and home front, if you make the right decisions. Studies indicate that couples having access to less demanding work, have better sex and better relationships and hence, are less likely to be stressed out. However, in case the working hours are long, the situation can become the opposite. Hence, it is important to find an exciting job, over which you can still have control, especially when you have small kids at home. Adjust the working hours Most women have to leave their careers halfway because their husbands work for long hours and there is no one available to care for the kids. If the wife too is good at work then, the couple should take up jobs that provide an opportunity for both of them to work, since doing this will keep both of them satisfied. There is a possibility that the husband, or the wife, may lose a bit on the income in this adjustment, but ultimately it increases the chances of having a happier marriage. The negative impact of leaving work If a career-oriented woman leaves her job due to family demands, it can shake the very base of the marriage, while also leaving her, depressed. Also taking a break, means you have to catch up very fast when you want to restart your career, which in reality, is quite difficult. In these situations, there is also a huge wage gap, between what you used to get before your break, and what you are getting after, that can lead to depression. Working moms help fortify the relationships between kids and their fathers When the father spends time babysitting the children, a closer bond develops between the kids and the father, which is usually not possible in families where the dad goes to work, full time. Studies show that children raised with equal devotion from both father and mother, have higher goals and aspirations and are even more empathetic. Feel less guilty A working woman usually feels guilty because she cannot spend as much time with her children, compared to the dedicated housewives. However, if the husband shares the duties related to bringing up the children both parents can be happy while playing their parts well for their kids. A woman with a successful career is positive and confident about everything she does, which ultimately makes her family happier.
Dealing with obsessive thinking and worriesAn old adage goes - 'Worry is like a rocking chair. It gives you something to do but it doesn't get you anywhere'. This is absolutely true for many of us who have developed the habit of worrying unnecessarily over outcomes and circumstances. Thinking about things and over our course of action is a good thing because you should always think twice before acting. What about obsessive thinking? Is it good for you? Anything in extremity is a bad thing, whether it is your favorite food or your thoughts. Worrying incessantly is a part of obsessive thinking where you cannot let go of negative thoughts and they circulate in your mind continuously. Obsessive thinking is a negative infinite loop, a broken record that is stuck without having anyone to click the stop button. So how should you deal with this obsessive thinking that is sure to spell your doom in the long run? Though psychologists have devised various scientific methods of overcoming obsessive thoughts and worries, here we have listed down some easy to follow rituals that will help you deal with such worries and thoughts. Meditation - Yoga swears by the art of meditation as it is thought to release all negative energy from the mind and soul. Concentrating on your breathing and also absorbing a positive source of energy is the essence of meditation. So whenever you are obsessed about something, sit down, calm your nerves and meditate. Physical activity - Exercising always helps. Engage in physical activity which increases the body's metabolism and requires effort. Indulge in those dance lessons or swimming or maybe cycling and you will divert your mind from those negative thoughts. Indulge in your hobbies - So you thought you don't have time for your hobbies, but your hobbies relax your mind and body. Moreover, a hobby also takes out the creative side in you. So, whether you like to collect coins or stamps, or lean towards arts and crafts, a hobby is sure to occupy your mind and take you away from worries. Socialize - Friends and relatives are your lifeline as they help you in those tough situations. Even if you are mentally not at peace, making social calls on your friends and relatives will take the edge off.  Try to meet people who can empathize with you and help you move out of it. Socializing will give you that much needed break from the vicious cycle of your thoughts. Though a short-term relief, going out for movies or taking a weekend getaway with your near and dear ones or even indulging your wife in shopping, can be helpful. Confide - Talking to someone close who understands you helps you in expressing your troubles. Thinking obsessively, you usually tend to ignore your feelings and emotions. Your mind remains trapped in the net of those obsessive thoughts and your emotional well-being takes a backseat. When you talk to another person, he or she will hear you out and help you relieve the stress that is on your mind. They would understand your state of well-being and support you emotionally. Be mindful - You may find it easy to go back into the same negative thought process. Don't let your mind chatter. Stop your mind by standing up for yourself. Stand in front of the mirror and say, "I am not a victim. I have the power and strength to move ahead" Do this whenever you become aware that you are going back into the same thought process.  This will give you the mental strength needed to come out of it.  Be mindful and aware but don't be too harsh on yourself. Be responsible -Your mind can make you or break you. If you understand this truth you will find it easier to manage your thoughts. Take responsibility of your thoughts good or bad.  The mind can create thoughts to project blame or judgments about others.  When you own your thoughts, you will find it easier to shape them the way you want. Create a higher vision of your life - When you keep a higher vision in your life, you can move ahead easily.  By developing a higher vision, you are asking yourself, who am I?and finally working towards it. You take positive actions and thus there would be more gratitude for what you have and less resentment for things that do not work.   This stops your mind from working unnecessarily. Obsessive worrying is a psychological disorder which in extreme cases has to be dealt with pathologically. Do not let your condition to reach the extreme end of the spectrum. Follow the above mentioned suggestions and try to deal with those thoughts yourself. It may take some time but rest assure, it will be effective in the long run.
Aerobics: dancing your way to healthAerobic exercise is any comprehensive activity that makes you breathe hard while exercising your large muscle groups at a standard, even pace. The body uses stored carbohydrates and fats for energy. What is aerobics? Aerobic literally means having or providing oxygen or an activity that takes place only in the presence of oxygen. What is aerobic exercise? Aerobic exercise is any comprehensive activity that makes you breathe hard while exercising your large muscle groups at a standard, even pace. The body burns stored carbohydrates and fats for energy. Thus aerobic exercises help the body to utilize oxygen efficiently with increase in respiration and heart rate. What are the best ways to do aerobic exercises? There are number of ways by which you can exercise aerobically. Some easy and best ways are: walking, running, biking, using stationary bike, using stair stepper, elliptical machines or rowing machines, or joining an aerobic exercise class Benefits of aerobic exercises Fat reduction: Aerobics burns calories and body fats directly while using oxygen to produce energy. So this is the healthiest way to get rid of extra fat.  Strong heart: Aerobic exercises not only use your larger muscle groups like hamstrings, but also strengthen the heart muscles. This improves heart function resulting in improvement of blood and oxygen supply to all body parts, which provides healthy nourishment to body cell and removes toxins. Improves breathing: Exercises improve your lung capacity and function,which improves oxygenation, or competence of respiratory system to deliver oxygen to all body parts. It also improves overall health of the respiratory system. Cholesterol control: LDL cholesterol is bad cholesterol mostly responsible for clogging of arteries and HDL is good cholesterol. Aerobic exercises invariable increase the amount of HDL and lower LDL cholesterol thus preventing fat deposition and plaque formation and maintaining optimal blood supply to heart. Other benefits: Aerobics is the best exercise when it comes to prevention of various diseases like hypertension, diabetes, stroke and arthritis and osteoporosis. It helps to keep mood elevated and cures depression and boosts immunity. Make sure to incorporate some form of aerobic exercise in your daily routine.  
Fruit diet can be dangerousFruits are healthy and provide lots of nutrition, vitamins, antioxidants, carbohydrates, fibre and bioflavanoids to the body.These things together protect your body from different health conditions and heart disease. However if you only eat fruit, you miss many other essential nutrients such as fats and protein. This can upset your stomach and lead to indigestion. Hence it is very important to take a well-balanced diet to remain healthy. Check out why you should not rely solely on fruits for living. Fruits do not provide protein Protein is highly important for your growth and development. By eating only fruits, you are restricting your intake of proteins that can stop your overall development process. Your body requires calories and energy on a regular basis. Each cell of your body contains protein. To keep your body cells in top working condition it is important that you include protein-rich foods such as lentils, soy products,  nuts and beans in your regular diet. You can also consume low-fat dairy, lean meat, fish and skinless poultry to provide required amount of protein to your body. Fruits do not provide fat Although excess of fat is not good for health, it is essential that your body requires on daily basis to ensure smooth functioning of your immune system and also to help your body absorb various minerals and vitamins provided by other foods like fruit. If you continue being a fruitarian for long duration, the chances of stroke due to brain haemorrhage increases. According to health experts, you should get around 20 to 35 percent of your daily calories from fat. To provide your body with good fats you should include soybean, sunflower, olive or canola oil in your diet. Fish and poultry also provide good amount of healthy fats to the body. Too much of fruits can lead to digestive problems Fruits provide fibres to the body in large amounts. Although your body needs fibre as it is one of the essential nutrients, getting too much of fibre can lead to side effects. Fibre works as broom to clear of your abdomen and aid in the digestion process. However, too much of fibre leads to stomach problems and cause symptoms such as gas, cramps and bloating. Sometimes it may also lead to chronic diarrhoea, dehydration and loose stools. On a regular basis, a woman requires only 22 to 28 gm of fiber per day and a man needs 34 to 38 gm. Apart from fruits, seeds, vegetables and whole grains also provide fibre to the body. Other considerations If you limit your intake to fruits, you may not get enough calories required for producing the required amount of energy. Consuming calories less than 1100 per day can lead to lot of side-effects such as intolerance to cold, gallstones, hair loss and fatigue. So although fruits taste wonderful and are very tempting, being a fruitarian is not the best thing for your health. Your body needs all the nutrients for carrying out its different activities and hence you should include variety of foods in your diet.  
All you need to know about angioplasty!Why would you need coronary angioplasty? The walls of the arteries are being constantly lined with a fatty material called plaque. This plaque increases in certain conditions like atherosclerosis. When the build-up is too high, the artery gets blocked and the subsequent tissue receives very less or no blood, causing it to die. The plaque at times may be dissolved by medicines but if it is too big, medicines prove ineffective. This is manifested outwardly as a heart attack. This is the time when the doctor would recommend the coronary angioplasty as a treatment for you. How is it done? A thin catheter with a deflated tiny balloon at one end is inserted into the affected artery. Once the exact location of plaque build-up is reached, the balloon is inflated causing the plaque to get pushed against the artery wall and creating free space for the blood to flow. A small mesh called a stent may be placed to hold the artery in place. Some stents are coated with medicines that prevent the scar tissue formation following the angioplasty procedure. The procedure may be done as an emergency or it may be planned. If it is a planned procedure: You will have to get hospitalized and stop eating or drinking 6 to 8 hrs before the procedure. Once the procedure is done, the doctor would prefer you staying in the hospital overnight to watch for any adverse events that may happen. What happens after the surgery? The surgery lasts for 1 to 2 hours and you would be allowed to go home the next day. You will be advised not to undergo vigorous and strenuous exercises and to rest adequately. Most people are fit to return to work a week after the surgery.
Advantage of the average - Automated continuous blood pressure monitoring technologyAlthough mercury sphygmomanometers (though a deadline is set for them to be phased out due to environmental concerns) are still considered the gold standards, the Aneroid and Digital counterparts represent the future of blood pressure monitoring. The need of long-term blood pressure monitoring arises with disorders and health conditions that demand more attention from the medical teams. Experts say that the fluctuations in BP in conditions like cardiovascular diseases, pregnancy, etc., if tracked at regular intervals, can reduce 22% of risks due to delay and no treatment. This necessity pushed the invention of invasive arterial blood pressure to be used during surgical procedures and further a continuous noninvasive arterial pressure measurement (CNAP) system. There have been multiple researches to overcome some of the roadblocks in measuring the arterial blood pressure in the noninvasive and external approach. Among these developments, the need for measurement of mean blood pressure was felt and the 24-hour BP variation in the patient was taken into account. The 24-hour model eliminates the errors in readings taken during clinic visits due to factors such as fluctuations as a result of white coat fear or after-effects of some stress or exertion. Trendsetting New-age Technology : In 2004, the medical world received the BpTRU non-invasive automatic blood pressure monitoring device. BpTRU devices proved to be a superior and more precise alternative when compared to other manual BP assessment techniques and even other 24-hour ABPM alternatives. The automated oscillometric devices precision and accuracy of assessed BP and heart rate is earmarked with a unique automatic technique - the device records 6 consecutive BP readings of the patient, discards the earliest, and the rest of the five values are put to average function and instantly the resultant mean BP reading flashes on the screen. Compatible with guidelines of American National Standard/Association for the Advancement of Medical Instrumentation (ANSI/AAMI EC13:2002) this is a time-saving, portable, and user-friendly device. A compact and automatic wrist cuff BP monitor, the smart blood pressure monitor that can be synchronized with with Apple’s iOS devices and a Bluetooth connectable and Android compatible blood pressure monitor marks the revolution of CNAP in modern times.
Internet and sex : Decoding virtual pornographyPornography is broadly categorized as softcore or hardcore. While hardcore contains intensive and highly graphic forms of sexual content, softcore constitutes less intensive form of sexual content. Genres of pornography are determined on the basis of the type of content and the status of the participants. The common sub-genres are ethnic, fetish, reality, group, and amateur. There are also sexual content specially created for different sexual orientations: heterosexual, homosexual, and bisexual. While sexual needs are natural and part of our biological set-up, the use of pornography is widely criticized for putting forward a partial portrayal of who a human being is. Majority of the pornographic material express a human only in sexual terms- as being someone looking for sexual endeavors- without paying attention to and inclusion of the person's emotional and mental state. The explication of human beings as purely sexual beings closes the eyes of the viewers many a times to the emotional and mental aspect of sexual intercourse, thus perverting the way they look at sexual intercourse in their relationships. Since sex is not holistically discussed on public platform as part of a healthy relationship and one only has access to understanding sexual practice through pornography which portrays a certain mechanistic and physically-induced aspect of sexual acts, viewing of pornography comes with the risk of sex addiction. Moreover, since pornography generally engages participants whose possess bodies which are conventionally considered sexually appealing, the viewers could implicitly get dissatisfied with their sex lives due to non-duplication of the same form of bodies in real life. Medical researches have also found that apart from having unreal expectations from one's partners, the viewer might find themselves lowly in sexual matters due to the sexual practices performed on the pornographic content that can be difficult to duplicate or are disliked. The portrayal of women in pornography is generally of persons who have no issues with being dominated over and who find such domination also sexually arousing. However, such a view is overwhelmingly false and a viewer on a regular fodder of such pornography could end up with deeply flawed perspective on women. Lastly, pornography also expresses various types of perverse forms of sex which are harmful to society, especially vulnerable groups. These include child sex, office-related sexual content, rough and rape sex, and public sexual acts. While pornography is a sure avenue to possibility of sexual perversion, healthy ways of satisfying one's sexual needs must be acknowledged and taken up. Moreover, it is integral that socially, sexual intercourse is recognized as a healthy part of emotional relationship. It needs not only absorbed as a purely physical act which is morally judged and shunned- the latter approach only increases the probability of pornography being seen as a last resort to learn about sex. In talking about sex as a natural process between mutually approving adults and as part of emotional relationship, we reduce the chances of sex being seen as a non-emotional activity and allow for there to be holistic understanding of sexual intercourse. For adolescents who are entering the age of sexual maturation, it is integral to introduce the physical relation between persons as being a result of emotional relationships, with understanding of the body holistically - as a harmony between physical and mental states. In the case of non-presence of holistic guidance, the chances of teenagers falling prey to pornography to understand sexual intercourse is high and as has been earlier explored, such an understanding of sex as activity between solely sexually-charged beings could result in perverted view of emotional relationships as well.
How to talk about STDsThese are dangerous times that we live in. Just the sheer number of people affected by sex related problems, diseases and conditions all over the world is simply terrifying. AIDS, venereal infections like syphilis and gonorrhea, herpes, HPV etc. are rampant and it calls for some responsible sexual behavior. However, that's a utopian world where humans will be monogamous and will behave responsibly. Even single people might get exposed to these diseases through indulging in risky sexual contact. Imagine doling out $750,000, as a woman in the US got from her husband because he gave her herpes. Even if you are not held legally accountable, what about moral responsibility to own up and discuss a possible STD infection with your partner! Take the case of Jack a happily married man for ten years who had casual sex when out of town on an official trip. He showed no obvious symptoms of any infection but in a month, his wife showed signs of herpes and his marriage crumbled as his wife struggled to come to terms with her husband's obvious infidelity and his callous manner in exposing her to a serious sexual infection. Call it ignorance but sometimes a person might engage in sexual intercourse and contract a disease which he might even not be aware of until the symptoms start appearing. (Refer article on Syphilis on www.topdoctorsonline.com) By then, he might have, in all probability, passed it on to his regular sexual partner or spouse. Or perhaps, there is another possibility that the person knows that he has contracted a sexual infection but doesn't know how to break the news to his partner.  If a person is aware of his infection, yet exposes another person knowingly, it is akin to premeditated murder. Yes, it is going to be a difficult thing to tell your partner which might even signal the end of the relationship or cause severe strain on it. So, if you are caught in a situation like this, what would you do? The option would be to visit a sex therapist and confide in him and then take an appointment for both and let the professional break it to the partner. That is of course if you are in a stable relationship. For those who both party to casual sex, the infected person generally won't be that open about his infection and may even choose not to care particularly if the other person is a complete stranger. A report in MedlinePlus news reveals some more shocking statistics: Many people said they occasionally, rarely or never got tested before having sex with casual partners (50 percent) or long-term partners (39 percent). Of the people who did discuss STD testing, very few discussed concurrent sexual partners or when partners' testing occurred in relation to their last sex act. Only half explained what types of STDs their partner had been tested for. These issues are important components of assessing STD risk, the researchers said. About one-third of participants reported telling a partner they didn't have an STD even though they hadn't been tested since their last sexual partner. One U.S. woman was awarded $750,000 in court from her ex-husband because he gave her herpes, and the legal trend is to make people accountable. (http://www.dummies.com/how-to/content/how-to-talk-to-a-partner-about-stds.html) Remember even wearing a condom is not a 100% guarantee that the infection won't pass on to the other person but that's the least that you can do if you don't have the courage to spill the beans about your condition. If you feel that your partner may be indulging in sexual activity with multiple partners and if you feel he might be infected, then you are well within your rights to decline to have sex with him until he/she gets tested. If you notice sores around the genitals do not indulge in oral or anal sex or any kind of sex and insist on a condom always; it could save your life.
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