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The moody man - Mood swings in menMen, such jokes on a woman's monthly mood swings are passe. Recent research proves that men are equally prone to have mood swings. Have you experienced a myriad of emotions? Angry, irritated, feeling helpless, self-pity, an irrational urge to throw things and cry and be depressed all at the same time? These are signs of mood swings. And the point of interest here is that you don't have to be a woman to experience mood swings. Men face their share of mood swings too! Men undergo hormonal influence too. And like women this causes them too to be irritable and cranky. The difference here is that the hormonal fluctuations are not as severe in men as in women. So the mood change lasts for a lesser time compared to a woman. Men's moods are also affected by psychological and physiological stressors. So a man who has to work against time to meet a deadline will be very irritable. A man who is deprived of sleep will end up snapping at you for no apparent reason. The myth that men don't cry, is something that men take to heart. Men are emotional beings and it is okay to show some of the emotions. The male stereotypical image is such that if a man is expressive of his emotional side, he isn't considered macho enough. Hence men tend to internalize their emotions and feelings. Often this leads to chronic depression. Taming the mood swings. Any form of physical exercise helps keep the mood in balance. This helps in keeping the aggressiveness under check. Sex is also a great way to release the stress and feel better, rather than snapping and using profanities. Another helpful way is to ask yourself 'why'. Whenever you feel that you are doing something irrational or out of character, ask yourself why. The answer you get from yourself will help clear the situation and you will end up handling it in a mature fashion. The irritable male syndrome. This is the male equivalent of the female menopause - The Andropause. It covers the symptoms seen in middle-aged men that occur due to the drop in testosterone levels. Like women, men show mood changes, bouts of irritability, grumpiness, hypersensitivity, anxiety and frustration. The recent research on men having mood swings and the society's acceptance of these findings is very encouraging. It helps stress in the fact that men are emotional too. There is nothing anti-macho about a man crying his heart out at times. It only shows he is human, after all.
Fashion tips for tall menRead on for the few tips which shall help you strike that perfect look always! No more tears for the "trousers" Trousers for tall men that you get in the market are too ill-fitting. They end up making you look "Too big for your pants", or "Too thin for your pants". The easy solution would be to choose a brand for your trousers, after proper research, and stick to it. Your quick checkpoints in this case can be: Your large thigh areas always make you look humongous. Hence, try to get a good and appropriate fit for your thighs. A small amount of flare in your lower legs can give you a good look, but that should go well with the texture and look of the trouser. Last but not the least, avoid loose fitting, or baggy pants. They will just make you look too thin, and tall always. Scare away the " shirt" hassles Have you picked up a T-shirt which lets your waistline be visible, the moment you move your hand a bit? That's a usual problem every tall guy faces. Try a few of these solutions, and see the results: If you are a tall and bulky person, then pick up a long double XL T-shirt, fitting you well. If you are a thin and tall person, then pick up a T-shirt which is long enough for your height, and then get it tailored for the perfect fit. Polo neck T-shirts can make you look too skinny. Try to get a formal shirt which fits you well, and is long enough to be worn tucked in. For tall people, tucking in the shirt helps them flaunt their height pretty well. You can also try and get the formal shirt fitted by a tailor, if you find it too big for your size. Forget the "Jacket" jeopardy Jackets and waist coats are the biggest gifts for all the tall guys out there. But how, and what to wear is the major turning point here as well. Complete your formal look with a waist coat. This shall make you look well built, and compliment your height as well. Blazers can be an option, for both the formal and informal look. Pick up a blazer which fits your broad shoulders well. A jeans, a t-shirt, and a jacket can be a killer combination. Go for earthy colors, as they give you a more masculine look compared to other colors. Tipping the "Tie"& Bolting the "Belts" Try to match the right clothes with the right accessories. Let's start off with the tie. Now, for tall men, getting a tie will be a pain. Always try the tie you are buying, and see if it comes till your waistline. You should also try to pick up a bit broader ties, as they make your chest look broader. When it comes to belts, try to pick up the big, horizontal buckles. Choose simple, horizontal buckles for the formal wear. For the informal look, however, you can experiment with other big buckles available. Watches Tall men with long hands and fingers should try to wear a big dial watch. This gives your fingers and arms a bulky look. Choose colors like gray, and black most of the time, as it makes you look more masculine. So, a few simple steps can make you flaunt your height. As the saying goes: "Wear your style; do not search for it in the stores. Your attitude is what matters the most to complete your look."
Yoga to strengthen women's lifeEveryone expects from a women for all their necessities. The husband needs to go to office and she has to prepare for this, the son or daughter needs to go to school, tiffin needs to be packed, and the in-laws need her attention for the morning tea and breakfast. Along with this she has to rush to office on time. Then while returning, she has buy vegetables and other things for household, then go home and cook, and sleep late after all the chores are done. For such a multi-tasking working-women, the time available is very less to replenish the energy she uses to do such work. Multitasking leads to stress and tension and causes headaches, stiff neck, tight shoulders, poor posture, shortness of breath, clenched teeth and fatigue. What is the solution for this? The only solution is YOGA.  We all know that yoga has many positive effects on ones well-being; it brings about both physiological and psychological benefits. It is beneficial for body, mind, and spirit. It needs only 10 minutes. Yoga helps to relieve your stress and tension. Yoga in Sanskrit means 'YOG' that is to join or unite. It is the union of mind, body, spirit, and breath with our surroundings and our universe. One should start yoga gradually with a comfortable speed and limits. Breathing exercises are excellent way to reduce stress and tension. It can be done along with asanas. For this you have to sit comfortably with relaxed shoulders and with your chin level at the floor. Inhale through the nose expanding your abdomen, rib cage, then expand your chest, then begin to exhale by contracting your abdomen, ribs and then lastly relax your chest. Now continue to breath in this fashion, this improves the quality and quantity of oxygen that enters our body and helps to relieve the shortness of breath and relieves the tension. The yoga mudra is helpful to relieve the stress, for this sit down crossed legged on the mat and keep the back straight, then take the arms behind your back and hold the left wrist with the right hand. Then by exhaling, bend forward to touch your left knee, while doing this focus on the feeling of surrendering to God, which protects you all the time, then while inhaling come back to the normal position and repeat this on the right side. Then finally, complete this pose by touching the forehead to the ground in front in the centre, while doing this exhale, then when you feel like inhaling come back to the normal position. This posture increases the energy and stimulates your respiration, improves your digestion calms your nerves. But this should be avoided by pregnant women, hernia patients, and patients with retinal disorder. The shavasana also helps you to relax your body before you get to work. In this you have to lie down on your back on the mat. Keep your arms a foot away from your body and your feet separated two feet apart.  Then close your eyes and focus on your breathing and feel free of thoughts and tension. Breathe normally and focus on your body parts, toes, legs, abdomen, head and finally the scalp and try to relax each muscle group. It improves your breathing, concentration, gives inner peace. You should avoid this if you are suffering from low blood pressure.  
Perfect partners in crime - Midlife crisis and dementiaThe responses we have to common stressful events in our daily lives have a lasting impact on our brain structure. The effects of a stressful event last a very long time, though apparently we seem to have recovered from it. Researchers say that the stress hormones keep circulating in our body long after the stress has passed. According to a recent Swedish research study, our response to common life events may trigger long-lasting physiological changes in the brain. These interestingly shocking findings come from the Prospective Population Study of Women in Gothenburg, a long term study on 800 women that lasted for almost forty years. The women who were a part of this study were all born before 1930, and underwent regular neuropsychiatric tests. The study started in 1968 assessed women for any baseline stressors like workplace problems, widowhood, alcoholism and illness in the family. Women who had serious issues at the start of the study had a 21% higher risk of developing Alzheimer's Disease and 15% higher risk of developing dementia later on in life. Interestingly, having to take care of a mentally ill family member like a sibling or mother, was found to be a major cause for development of dementia later on in life. The findings of this study show that accumulated stress from common life events has severe physiological and psychological consequences. These physiological consequences include adverse effects on the central nervous, cardiovascular and endocrine and immune systems. There have been several studies that state that the effects of stressful events like earthquakes, cyclones and floods can have a lasting impact on life and often shape the person's personality. What makes this study interesting is its finding that daily stressors accumulated over a period of time and often left unresolved, have a lasting impact that shows up in later stages of life!
A correctable disfigurement of face: Cleft lip and palateThe Times of India reports that "With an incidence of 7 per 1000 children, cleft lip and palate deformity is one of the most common deformities among Indian children." The number of infants born every year with cleft lip and cleft palate in India is 28,600. This means 78 affected infants are born every day or 3 infants with clefts are born every hour. Cleft lip and palate develop early in pregnancy where lack of adequate amounts of tissues lead to two parts of the face failing to join adequately at the middle. A cleft lip or hare lip (as it is commonly called) refers to separation of the two sides of the upper lip. There appears a narrow opening or gap over the skin of the upper lip. This separation may sometimes extend beyond the base of the nose and may involve the upper gum and/or the bones of the upper jaw. A cleft palate refers to the gap between the two edges of the roof of the mouth, causing it to remain open at birth. The bony front portion of the roof of the mouth or the hard palate may be involved alone, or along with the soft palate or the soft back portion of the roof of the mouth. Since lip and the palate develop separately, it is possible to have a cleft lip without a cleft palate or vice versa. Causes of developing cleft lip and cleft palate: The exact cause of cleft lip and palate is unknown. Some research, however, suggests that these clefts are caused by a combination of genetic and environmental factors. The risk of such clefts thus can be reduced by adopting a healthy lifestyle during pregnancy. This includes avoidance of smoking, alcohol and having a healthy diet to avoid excessive weight gain during pregnancy. Cleft lip and palate can occur alone with no other problems or defects. This is called non-syndromic clefts. They may also occur as part of other birth defects and then may be called part of a syndrome. Cleft lip and palate may occur on one side (unilateral) or may occur on both sides (bilateral). Unilateral cleft lip and palate is more common than bilateral cleft lip and palate. Left-sided cleft lip and palate is twice as common as right-sided cleft lip and palate. The reason for this is unclear. A cleft lip or combined cleft lip and palate are seen more commonly in male babies. Cleft palate alone is more common in female babies. The face of the baby usually develops around 5th and 9th weeks of pregnancy thus this defect may arise early in pregnancy. Treatment of cleft lip and palate: Cleft lip and palate is usually corrected using cosmetic or plastic surgery. Results are usually very good. After treatment, most children have a normal appearance. To prevent and correct associated speech problems and dental problems, treatment is also sought from speech and language therapists, as well as dental surgeons (orthodontic specialists). Excellent results may be seen if the specialists work in tandem.
Exercise to fight off depression in school kidsBefore concluding on the effects of different forms of exercise on children, it is important to note the distinction between fitness and exercise. Fitness encompasses most importantly a healthy lifestyle of which exercise forms a part. For this reason, when researchers examined the impact of fitness on emotional being of a child, most of them covered three main determining factors, namely the body mass index, the child's feeling about fitness, and a shuttle-run test. Depression is characterized by recurrent feelings of despair and hopelessness. The main symptoms of depression include sensations of unworthiness, dysfunctional thinking, lack of concentration, low level of sleep, anger, social isolation, crying, physical grievances like headaches which do not react to treatments, reduced interest in social activities, and thoughts on suicide. It is not necessary that every child will undergo all the symptoms. If most of the symptoms recur continuously, then it is a warning sign. The propensity towards chronic depression is higher in those who suffer from depression during childhood. A healthy lifestyle is accompanied by a range of psychological benefits. When you exercise, your body produces endorphins which stimulate positive sensations about the self. Produced by the brain, they also reduce the sensation of pain. A healthy lifestyle boosts the sleep cycle and helps in coping better with tough situations. A medical study conducted by University of Texas revealed the positive effects of physical activity on middle-school graders. It was found that there is a robust link between depression and fitness in girls. Even though boys show association, it is not explicit.  Conclusively, it was pronounced that exercise helps in reducing the chances of depression in school-going children. The best way to help your child is by introducing activities that she or he finds interesting. Initially, you might face resistance. The most important task is to communicate with your child. In the face of such resistance, you can attempt to find a hybrid therapy to reach out to your child. Apart from scheduling appointment with a child psychologist, you can also meet up with a physical health advisor. Emphasize on activities which will also help your child to meet new people. According to the Center for Disease Control and Prevention, one of the main benefits of physical activity is betterment of academic achievement and conduct in children.
Mood disordersMood disorder is a category of mental health problems, and it includes all types of depression and bipolar disorder. The cause of mood disorder is not well known. Endorphins in brain are responsible for positive moods. The neurotransmitters regulate endorphins. Depression and other mood disorders are caused by a chemical imbalance in the brain. Life events such as unwanted changes in life may also contribute to a depressed mood. Mood disorders are inherited. Children, adolescents, or adults who have a parent with a mood disorder have a greater chance of also having a mood disorder. Symptoms: Prolonged feeling of sadness Helpless feeling Low self-esteem Intense guilt Suicidal thoughts Loss of interest in daily activities Difficulty with relationships Disturbed sleep Change in appetite or weight Low energy Inability in concentrating Inability to make decisions Frequent physical complaints (i.e., headache, stomach ache, fatigue) Threats of running away from home Hypersensitivity to failure or rejection Irritability Aggressive behaviour Hostility In mood disorders, these feelings appear more intense than what a person may normally feel from time to time. Treatment Psychotherapy: It is focused on changing the individual's distorted views of themselves and the environment around them, working through difficult relationships, and identifying stress triggers in their environment and how to avoid them. Family therapy: Families play a vital supportive role in any treatment process. Antidepressant medications: Medications in combination with psychotherapy has shown to be very effective in the treatment of depression.
Building self confidence by improving body languageSo what have they told you? That only physically attractive people have the right to self-confidence? That you either have it in you or you don't? Let's face it, confidence is the key to anything and everything. Right from driving a car to handling work to dating, confidence is what separates the proverbial wheat from the chaff. What you need to remember is that the mind speaks the body language. Conversely if you change your body language, then it has an impact on the mind as well. Mr.Hunched Over This guy is the classic example of a person who just doesn't like himself. The world is a mighty dangerous place for him. Just look at the way he walks. Shoulders all hunched over, head down as he shuffles rather than walk. Mr. Hunched Over generally finds it difficult to look people in the eye as he speaks and he last is handshake is as limp as his mind. He crosses his arms tightly, touches his nose all the time to see if it has grown since he lied through it. Mr. Walk the Walk and Talk the Talk This chap is diametrically the opposite of the first kind. He exudes an air of confidence in his walk, manner and speech. He has a confident stride which is helped by the fact that he stands to his height with his head held high, chin tucked in and shoulders squared back. This is what gives him the confidence as this posture is designed for efficiency. Mind you, he isn't ram rod straight, just straight enough so that his ears are in line with his shoulders and hips. The chest is also out since the shoulders are drawn back towards the hip. This facilitates deep, even and diaphragmatic breathing which prevents anxiety. His hand shake is firm. As he offers his hand, he exerts just the right pressure on the other person's hand to indicate a strong grip. This is no wrestling bout, so the confident man always exerts just the right kind of pressure in a hand shake.  He maintains eye contact with the person he is talking to; not a staring about, but normal eye contact, one which won't make the other person conscious of being stared at. He looks away from time to time to give his eyeballs a rest. This is why he comes across as genuine and not shift eyed and restless. To be Mr.-Or- Ms. Walk the Walk Always square your shoulders and keep your head held high when you walk. You might seem imperious or high handed at first, but then it will work wonders on your self-esteem and you will begin to feel differently about yourself. You needn't even be a tall person to come across as cool and confident-just stand up to your own height and see the miracle. Breathe slowly steadily and deeply. Use your abdominal muscles to draw in your breath rather than engaging your neck muscles which end up making you a shallow breather and plus you also tend to hunch easily if you don't feel your rib cage and stomach expand as you breathe in. Practice standing and speaking in front of the mirror. It will show you exactly how you appear to others. Practice your walk in front of a video camera and keep a record of your metamorphosis.
Sunburn: Overview and treatmentSunburns could also be accompanied by allergic responses to medicines, exposure to sun and sunscreen products, sight-related issues like reduced or complete loss of vision, as well as heatstroke. Over a long period of time, frequent cases of sunburn can result in cold sores, cataracts, skin cancer, and lupus.  The factors which will decide the vulnerability to sunburns are: Type of skin - The type of skin determines the vulnerability and intensity of the sunburn. The most vulnerable groups are those with freckled and fair skin as well with blonde or red hair. Regardless of the color of the skin, all skin types are vulnerable to skin cancer and proper sun protection must be used during times of sun exposure. Season - Summer days carry with them a higher probability of burning the skin. UV Index - This refers to the forecast of the strength of UV light on a particular day. This will let you know the cautionary measures you need to take in order to avoid skin damage. This is put forward on a scale of 0 to 11+ with 0 being the lowest exposure. Latitude - As you move to locations closer to the equator, the sunlight directly passes through the atmosphere to a greater extent. Age - Those who are younger than 6 years of age and those over 60 years are at a greater risk of getting sunburns. Altitude - As you climb higher and higher, the chances of sunburn are also greater since the amount of Earth's atmosphere to keep away the sunlight reduces. Every elevation of approximately 1000 feet, the UV exposure is amplified by about 4%. Location - If you are close to reflective surfaces like snow, water, ice, concrete and white sand, rays of the sun which get reflected off these might harm you. Time of the day - The rays of the sun are strongest between 10 in the morning and 4 in the evening. Though, the probability of getting sunburn are lower on cloudy days, it is possible for the UV rays of the sun to pass through the clouds and negatively affect your skin health. Here are the precautionary steps you can take to avoid getting sunburn: Avoid staying in the sun for a long period of time. Make use of sunscreen and choose clothing which cover your skin. In case you are suffering from sunburn, here are ways to treat it: An over-the-counter pain reliever: In order to lower the inflammation and relieve pain, use ibuprofen or aspirin. Anti-inflammatory condiment: Cortisone cream and aloe vera are two primary ways of reducing the inflammation. Cool bath: Take bath for about 10-20 minutes in water of cool temperature (make sure the water is not too cold). This will cut back the pain and irritation in affected area.  Do not use any bath oil, soap or detergent as this might increase the chances of allergic reactions and irritation to the injury. When drying yourself after the bath, do not rub with towel. Cold compressions: Try application of cold and wet compressions on the concerned region for about 20-30 minutes. Adequate hydration: Make sure you drink at least 8-12 glasses of water to help your skin to recover from the sun damage. Moisturizer: Once your skin begins to heal, use a gentle moisturizer without any scent. Blister treatment: In case you have blisters, do not try to pop them. This will lead to infection and marks.However, if you have large blisters which require to be drained, then pop them using a sterilized needle. Follow this by cleaning the area dry with gauze. After applying ointment to the area (Aloe vera or antibiotic ones like bacitracin and polymyxin B), wrap the area loosely using a gauze bandage. Make sure you do not tie it tightly and change the gauze daily to avoid infection. Medical attention: In case you feel nauseous along with fever, rashes and chills, then make a visit to the doctor. The following symptoms also require you to seek medical attention immediately: Pain in eyes with sensitivity to light, dizziness, high thirst without proper urination, painful blisters, and pale/cool skin.
How to say 'Bye' to split ends? Check out these 10 tips!One of the main reasons for split ends is the use of curling irons and other heat-induced styling treatments. When you go for hair products like hair colors or perms, the shield over your hair's shaft that protects it can get stripped off, thus making your hair liable to split ends. You could also be mechanically stressing your hair by pulling them too much while combing or combing repeatedly. Remember that rubbing your hair up towards the direction of the scalp does not lead to split ends. While there is no remedy to treat split ends, there are ways in which you can keep them away. Did you know that a medical research showed that the only way to keep split ends away is to put a stop on the excessive use of chemical on it? Hairdresser, Holly Kensen, says that split ends are the results of pushing out the natural process and pulling in too many chemicals. It is best to stay away from the styling products and embrace your natural hair! TIP 1 : Get hold of a piece of rosemary (fresh ones are the best!) and immerse them in a cup of hot water for 30 minutes. Once the temperature of the water is back to normal, whisk an egg into it. Mix this blend onto your hair. Rinse after 15 minutes using a light shampoo. TIP 2 : Bring home a ripe papaya and cut it into halves. Choose the part which you believe will be sufficient for your hair. Take off the skin and seeds. Mash it until it becomes a paste. Then, drop a cup of yogurt and stir them into a smooth paste. Apply it on your hair and let it hold for about 30 minutes. Use cold water to rinse it off. TIP 3 : Condition your hair with castor oil. Mix equal amounts of castor, almond, and olive oil and apply it on your hair generously. Wrap your hair in a towel and let it stay for 30 minutes. Then, shampoo your hair. TIP 4 : After you have shampooed your hair, apply a mix of cream and milk on them for about 20 minutes. Focus especially on the ends. Rinse your hair with cold water. TIP 5 :If you decide to trim your hair on your own, then don't use the paper scissors! They are called 'paper' scissors for a reason. Get hold of hair shears which will not leave your ends damaged. TIP 6 : Trim your hair every six to eight weeks at least up to ¼ to 1 inch. Due to our environment, it is natural for the hair to get damaged in a few weeks. It is important to remove the split ends and let them grow healthy. TIP 7 : Do not trust products which say that they can 'cure' your split ends. Split ends are not curable. They are preventable. The only thing that these products do is to seal up the splits which only makes your hair unhealthy. TIP 8 : Try to stay away from chemicals as much as you can. Chemicals only tamper with your natural hair and ruin their texture. If you really have to use it then make sure you condition them regularly. TIP 9 : Use coconut oil to fix your split ends. Buy an extra-virgin and organic coconut oil. Before washing your hair, apply about 2 spoons of the oil on your dry hair. Emphasize on the hair ends. If you want, you can steam your hair for some time (about 20 minutes). Then, wash your hair with a light shampoo and condition them. TIP 10 :This is one of the best ways to help your split ends stay away: Get hold of chamomile tea and brew it on a pot. Then pre-rinse your hair with it. After you have rinsed them, wash and condition your hair normally.
Flash the pearliesRemember the lines from the song, Words? Smile an everlasting smile, a smile can bring you near to me.  Well, ideally, you wouldn't want your teeth to be yellow when you flash that smile. So for those who have shades of yellow on their teeth, here's how you can go back to white. It's first important to understand what causes yellowing of the teeth. Eating habits: Carbonated drinks dissolve teeth enamel. Tea, coffee and other caffeinated drink stain the teeth yellow.In addition, alcohol and cigarette smoking too can stain teeth. Tobacco chewing especially produces stains that are difficult to remove.Food rich in artificial sweeteners are harmful for teeth. They not only make the teeth yellow but also produce cavities. Chocolates, pastries, ice-creams and all such sugar-rich foods are sticky. They stick to teeth and have corroding effect on tooth enamel and dentin and cause yellow teeth, decay and toothache. Oral hygiene: Poor hygiene of oral cavity leads to stains and caries. Take good care of your teeth. Brush teeth twice. Floss them and use a mouthwash. Ageing: Gradual loss of enamel and wear and tear lead to yellow teeth. Medicines: Medicines like iron tablets, tetracycline too can lead to yellow teeth. Injury: Trauma to teeth can sometimes lead to yellowing. This is common amongst kids. Preventing yellowing of teeth Maintain a good dental hygiene. Brush twice for atleast 3-4 minutes. But be gentle while brushing teeth. Gargle every time after you eat.This removes the leftover food particles and keeps the teeth clean. Avoid use of local powders or corrosive substances. They damage enamel. Fruits like apple, cucumber, and carrot act like cleansing agents and keep teeth clean. Fruits like sweet lime are rich in vitamin C and help to keep gums and teeth healthy.
Is sex linked to self esteem?Man is a curious creature, full of quirks and contradictions. Sexual intercourse, something that most people consider an intimate and private experience, is spoken about in hushed tones and often, with some discomfort. We don't reveal or talk about our sexual desires, as readily we discuss our salary packages or food habits. This is quite ironic seeing how sex is an important gauge for a person's self esteem and also an indicator of his/her social desirability. The very thing that we do under covers, we somehow choose to "keep under cover". The Link between Sex and Self Esteem: Self esteem is an important factor that determines the mental & physical well-being of an individual. All of us have a craving to be understood, liked and appreciated; and these form the equivalent of our basic needs on the inverted pyramid- Food, clothing and shelter. For a human being to flourish and prosper, consumable food, without the mental food of appreciation, is not enough; and sexual intercourse or an intimacy with the opposite sex, is one way of validating that need. Sex therefore, ceases to be just a physical need instilled by nature for the perpetuation of the species, but goes into the larger emotional cum psychological dimension of self actualization and realization. Though some of us might be embarrassed to broach the topic of 'whether or not we are getting enough', the truth is that every human seeks to achieve his sexual potential, even while he or she might, not be aware of it. Most of us have the ability to get the foods matching our taste preferences onto our plates, but with sex, this could be a little difficult, since sex, is a complex subject with a lot of social, moral and religious links. The truth is evident in the number of marriages (the very cornerstones of civil society) that fail on the basis of sexual compatibility, either by setting unrealistic sexual expectations or by not owning up to, or even identifying, one's sexual needs. This has repercussions on the psyche and self-esteem of a person, and this is especially true in the case of men in particular, as they may feel completely inferior for not being able to attract a sexual partner matching his desires. In some people, this also leads to a case of self-loathing, for having sexual needs which a partner doesn't understand, or much worse, needs which are considered taboo and sinful (Homosexuality, Anal Sex, Group Sex, Fetishes, etc.) These complex emotions can wreak  havoc on a person's self-esteem, by creating severe internal conflicts and serious self-doubts. Now socially, sex can either liberate a person, or hold him prisoner. At times, the unfulfilled needs may get repressed and banished to the shadows, only to be played out later, in the form of sexual adventurism and crime. Just one look at the sexual crimes in our society today, and we can clearly understand just how healthy our collective self esteem is! The very society that frowns upon prostitution, is actually responsible for creating it, though everybody would like to pretend otherwise. The crux of the matter is that "sex" and "self esteem" are closely related; and one should not shy away from addressing any issues one might face regarding one's sexuality. Physical love is necessary for the survival of a relationship and one needs to make time and efforts to successfully create one's own sexual space. The positive effects of a good sex life can be seen in an increased work productivity, fewer illnesses and an increase in one's overall efficiency. Some people are haunted by sexual guilt and confusion and when they keep it all locked up, they suffer from unexplained physical pains and feel 'down in the dumps' mentally. Another problem with appreciation from the opposite sex, is the addiction to  external validation. Some people feel utterly worthless until they receive positive feedback about their looks or abilities on a regular basis. This can be downright devastating, as in these cases, there is a great dependence on external factors for one to feel good. While no one denies the "feel good factor" of sexual appreciation, it is up to each one of us, to decide just how much of control one must be giving to external factors, to determine our personal self-esteem. The appreciation may be theirs, but the esteem is entirely of the self and only the self can decide how much of appreciation and sex is enough.
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