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Absent father, violent kids!When children are growing up, they undergo a lot of hormonal changes and have varying emotional requirements. If these requirements are not fulfilled by the presence of both parents, they can develop into violent adults. Single parenting for a mother, is extremely difficult; it is simply impossible for her to fill the void left behind by an absent father. When a couple cannot live under the same roof due to major differences, they separate or get divorced. However, the requirements of the children remains the same; they still need the care and love of their mother and the support and guidance of their father, to grow up without any complications or insecurities. Children usually look up to their father as a symbol of strength and security and in his absence, they might not receive the same support and may feel inadequate and insecure. If during their childhood kids do not get the support and security that only a father can provide, they might bottle up the feelings inside; and these feelings usually explode when they grow into violent adults. A Father's Absence is Critical Due to whatever reasons, if the father is not present in the family during the most important growing periods of the kids, they have more chances of turning to crime and drugs, than the children who have a father by their side. According to a research conducted by the Research Institute of the McGill University Health Center located in Quebec, a father's absence, especially during the child's prime growing period, can lead to behavioral problems when they grow into adults. The research was carried out on mice raised only by their mothers and showed that the mice that were brought up in the absence of their fathers, were  abnormal and aggressive in their social interactions. Gabriella Gobbi, who is an author and a senior associate professor at the McGill University - Faculty of Medicine, says that even though the experiment was carried out on mice, the findings are highly relevant to the behavior of humans, under similar circumstances. Role of Fathers and Fatherhood Another research carried out by Dr. David Popenoe, a renowned sociologist, throws light on the role of fatherhood and fathers. According to Popenoe, fathers should not be treated as mere second adults in the family. Fathers, who are more involved in their family, have a certain positive impact on the children, which no other person is capable of. Fatherhood is an important responsibility and the presence of fathers in a family, directly influences the well-being of the growing children. In the absence of fathers, mothers may try their level best to provide their children with the right kind of upbringing and education. However, they might fail to give the kids the support and strength that only a father can provide. Due to this, children fail to face the challenges of life head on and are unable to handle their problems with an open mind. When a lot of emotions get bottled up inside, in most cases, they find their release in the form of violence. Sometimes, children also lack the right kind of guidance in their growing years and mothers fail to handle their changing emotional requirements, due to which these kids become increasingly frustrated and violent as they grow up.  
Broad chest, weak lungs - Are men more prone to respiratory diseases?The long-standing, chronic afflictionof the respiratory disease is called as COPD, i.e., Chronic Obstructive Pulmonary Disease. COPD is the obstruction within the lung tissue, causing improper circulation and entrapment of air. This limits the space for air to move in and out, directly affecting the quality of inhalation. A small reminder here may be necessary - breathing is synonymous with life, why? Because that's how we get oxygen, which is vital for the functioning of each and every cell within the body. With COPD, the ability to take in oxygen gets compromised increasingly. Continued cough, sputum, and shortness of breath are the main symptoms. COPD is more common in men. Does it have to do anything with being a male? Not necessarily. No specific link has been established to say that COPD risk is higher for you solely because you are a man. Then, what could it be? A study conducted in 2011 in USA showed that the number of men who smoke is 5% more than the women who do. To understand the reason behind this, let us see the primary causes of this disease. Air pollution, some genetic predispositions, frequent acute infections, exposure to harmful chemicals for a long time (usually occupational) - are some of the main causes, and the number one cause is smoking, owing to almost 80-90% of the cases. Park this thought. Next piece of information is simply revisiting some facts you may already know: #The gender classification ofsmokers - Men are known to smoke more than women all over the world, not only in numbers, but also in quantity. Whether it is a developing country or a developed one, 2011 studies say there are more male smokers everywhere than female smokers. Not only there are more men who smoke, they smoke for longer periods and more number of cigarettes than female smokers. This may vary from country to country, like India has much less women smokers than USA does, but the difference between the two genders holds true everywhere, only the ratios differ. #Occupational exposure to harmful chemicals and gases - These are industries of mining, textile, chemical engineering, welding, etc. The number of men working in such industries is way higher than women. #Air pollution - Men are more exposed to air pollution since they are outdoors more than women. This may not apply to all countries and societies, but is generally true. Now, we can put the pieces together and understand why COPD is more common in men? Yes, they are at a higher risk because of higher exposure to smoking, pollutants and irritants. Cigarette smoking is the leading cause of lung diseases and male smokers outnumber women across the world. You can figure out the math here!
Hair straightening do's and don'tsWhat's in a hair? Well when someone thought of this quote, he or she certainly did not foresee the future because in today's world hair is everything. For a woman and a caterpillar at least! Let's just talk about women! Hair not only covers your scalp, but also protects it.  Hair is known to be something that enhances the beauty of a woman, as there is nothing like the feel of smooth and silky hair caressing the shoulders. Women all over the world dream to have beautiful, strong, silky, and preferably, long straight hair. Why straight hair? Let's find out, women are born with all kinds of hair, curly, wavy, long, and short but according to some women there is nothing that beats having a straight hair and there are women in this world who could go to any length achieving that straight hair they always desired. One of those ways is straightening, a styling technique used since the 1980's, which involves the flattening as well as straightening of hair, to give it a smooth, streamlined, and a sleek look. Straightening can be of two types, temporary or permanent. Temporary straightening can be achieved by a straightening iron or relaxers and generally lasts up to the first wash. Permanent hair straightening generally requires the use of Lye and other chemicals (more commonly known as creamy crack) with the help of a hot comb, hot iron, and relaxers. Permanent straightening, with proper care, can easily last up to a year. According to documentary "Good Hair" by actor Chris Brown, African American women are known for their profound use of "creamy crack" to get that perfect straight hair they long for. They are also the women who make the cosmetic companies rich, thanks to their profound use of hair straightening and hair care related products. African American women also account for the highest amount of money spent on hair care and hair care related products. Coming in a close second are the women from Central and South East Asia. These women are also known to go to extremes to get that perfect straight hair look, which is generally shown in TV Commercials endorsed by celebrities. Now that we are aware of the statistics, it is time that we look into the do's and don'ts of hair straightening. Straightening your hair once in a while may sound like a good idea, but it is extremely essential that we understand that extreme care is required here. Hence it is always better to know the do's and don'ts before we decide to break the bank (straightening ain't cheap) for straightening treatments. Do's : Make sure your diets consist of plenty of healthy foods, water. Also doing regular exercise is advised. Always use a shampoo and conditioner that best suits you. Remember to ask your stylist about the kind of products that suit you. Always go for hair spa treatment once a month since your hair needs that extra nourishing. Don'ts : Do not wet your hair at least for three days after the treatment. Do not tuck your hair behind your ear. Avoid twisting your wet hair with a towel. Avoid extreme scrubbing of your hair while shampooing. Straightening even once can cause excessive damage, hence do not do it repeatedly. Straightening your hair once in a while is okay, but doing it continually is ill advised as it can have a lot of negative consequences. Straightening also comes with certain side effects such as heavy chemical reaction, dizziness, permanent hair damage, dryness, skin irritation, itchiness, and severe chemical burns. Hence, it's always better to have a professional do it at a salon rather than doing it yourself. Hair straightening, though done by the same method all around the world, requires different types of hair care products as the hair type is mostly related to your race and ethnicity and your geographical location.
Perfect partners in crime - Midlife crisis and dementiaThe responses we have to common stressful events in our daily lives have a lasting impact on our brain structure. The effects of a stressful event last a very long time, though apparently we seem to have recovered from it. Researchers say that the stress hormones keep circulating in our body long after the stress has passed. According to a recent Swedish research study, our response to common life events may trigger long-lasting physiological changes in the brain. These interestingly shocking findings come from the Prospective Population Study of Women in Gothenburg, a long term study on 800 women that lasted for almost forty years. The women who were a part of this study were all born before 1930, and underwent regular neuropsychiatric tests. The study started in 1968 assessed women for any baseline stressors like workplace problems, widowhood, alcoholism and illness in the family. Women who had serious issues at the start of the study had a 21% higher risk of developing Alzheimer's Disease and 15% higher risk of developing dementia later on in life. Interestingly, having to take care of a mentally ill family member like a sibling or mother, was found to be a major cause for development of dementia later on in life. The findings of this study show that accumulated stress from common life events has severe physiological and psychological consequences. These physiological consequences include adverse effects on the central nervous, cardiovascular and endocrine and immune systems. There have been several studies that state that the effects of stressful events like earthquakes, cyclones and floods can have a lasting impact on life and often shape the person's personality. What makes this study interesting is its finding that daily stressors accumulated over a period of time and often left unresolved, have a lasting impact that shows up in later stages of life!
Teenage troubles for autistic kidsTeenage brings along with it a lot of physical and psychological problems. Your body undergoes a lot of changes, the way the world looks at you is changing and you are not in the position to accept all this. Teenage is one of the most painful periods in one's life.  For an autistic child teenage can be compared to living a nightmare day in and day out. Here is a look at the problems of teenage from an autistic kid's point of view: Social Interaction The ability to interact socially is absent in autistic kids. They are loners who prefer to be left alone and undisturbed in their own worlds. Such a child is a natural target for bullying and ragging by other kids of his age group. At times even if the autistic child wants to come out and make friends, he is not able to do so due to lack of the required skills. Teenage is a period where you need at least one friend to confide in. It can be an extremely difficult phase when you are all alone. Puberty This is the dramatic time in life dilled with hormones and emotions. Your body undergoes lots of changes and you are confused about so many things. You don't know whom to ask or whom to turn to for guidance. Autistic children do not have the maturity to understand this phase. Special issues for autistic teens and sexuality include: Knowledge of physical changes in body. Knowledge of 'good' and 'bad' touch. Ability to communicate about a 'bad' touch or action. Keeping 'safe' distance from others. Handling menstrual cycles. Avoiding 'self-touch' in public. It can be a phase of emotional turmoil for the parents. They need to work closely with their child's special teachers to chalk out a plan that will be best suited to the child in handling puberty successfully. Self-help skills Simple self-help skills like hygiene can be a challenge for teenagers with autism. Improper motor skills, compliance, and sensory problems may interfere with a teen's progress. The proper training of hygiene and grooming can help to add these elements into the daily routine. The right approach is to simplify each task into simple small steps. The positive reward system is a great source of encouragement, as positive motivation always help the teenagers. Higher Functions Autistic teenagers are socially awkward. They lack the power to comprehend and process complex social cues which includes sarcasm, body language, humor, emotional responses and facial expressions. What complicates the problem is that the autistic child lacks empathy and hence may appear rude. Such kids are likely to be teased a lot in school settings.
Your child is ready for school... but are you?It was still okay. Just 2-3 hours which you could utilize for other things while your child was away briefly. Now you will have to compete along with teachers, textbooks and homework for your child's attention. Well Mother, we know this is going to be difficult for you, but let's see if we can try and make it any easier. Think of school as an extension of the tender loving care that you provided. The only difference is that the TLC will go towards nurturing and developing his/her brain and help it learn important skills which will help gain a balanced development. At this point your child feels bad and completely unsafe in this new hostile world of teachers and uniforms and what not! If you weaken at this point your child will cop on and then will come the emotional blackmail. So explain the importance of school to your child as it will make the transition easier. It is always good for mothers to accompany their children to school but imagine watching mother walk away and all hell can break loose. So if your child's school has a school bus facility you can walk him to the bus stop and then say your goodbyes there. A lump in the throat at the bus stop is preferable any day than a scene at school with a child holding on to mother for dear life. Do not criticize your child's school or assignments given by them as children can catch on quite quickly and that can be reason enough for them not to concentrate on school activities. Always encourage your child to talk about what he did at school and ask him questions about his friends and teachers. This gives the impression that school is as important as home and gradually even you will reconcile yourself to the fact that school is here to stay.
Accepting your flawsThere are basically two kinds of 'flaws,' one that is physical and the other that is in your personality. A physical 'flaw' like being too short, fat, or darkis never a person's fault. Thus accepting what you are can only boost your self-esteem and confidence. Despite these 'shortcomings,' it is your character and your achievements that stand out in the long run and not the way you look. The first step in creating a better life is accepting if you are wrong! Personality traits and habits are mostly visible to others but not to you. These are those faults that can cause bitterness in relationships or cause problems at work or in our social interactions. Some people lose their temper easily, some are lazy, and some are rude, while some are either introverts or extroverts. If you have flaws that can cause problems for others then the best thing you can do is to change those negative traits in yourself. Character flaws might be natural, but they can affect others negatively. The first thing in making improvements is to analyze yourself. What are you so angry about ? Is it really some other person's fault or that you have had a bad day at the office? Give it a thought and once you find the answers, you will feel relieved. Accept your physical flaws and love yourself for what you are, as this is the key to lasting happiness. Major flaws like alcoholism, splurging money, borrowing money, or addictions are what one should be willing to overcome. If you accept you have any of these major flaws and need help to overcome them, then you need to seek help. There are professionals who can help out, provided you are a willing party to the process. Improvement will come only if you are willing to change. Remember that flaws are easy to acknowledge and to change;the only thing required is the desire within you to do so.
How to remember everyone you meet?Now that would be quite a feat, would it not? To be able to recall the name and occupation of every person we ever encountered right down to the minutiae of how, where, and why we were introduced to them to begin with! Sometimes we raise the bar of forgetfulness to the extent of forgetting just who it was who introduced us to "Mr. what's-his-face!" If only there were ways to remember the modest and average people who leave virtually no impression on us, wouldn't that save us great embarrassment? Plus it will help us do away with those sheepish looks when it dawns upon the other person that you haven't the foggiest of notions as to who he is. Stranger: Hi! You remember me? How are you doing, Frankie? Frank: Umm! I am well (this guy's face looks mighty familiar, but for the life of me, I cannot recall ever having cast my eyes on him). Stranger: So, how was your annual bridge completion? Manage to beat the Swiss pairs this time? Frank: Atta boy! Got it! This guy happened to be kibitzing at the weekend bridge club at Aldermere. Whew! Stranger: You gave me quite a start there. You looked right through me and I was quite not pleased at the fact that just last week I happened to congratulate you. Frank: Well Martin, be tough to not remember you, of course I do! Just didn't think of bumping into you here. Martin: Well, I am Walther and I can now see that you don't remember me at all! How many times has the above scenario happened to us? While it is well-nigh impossible to remember every name or face that we come across, it would be  a good habit to at least attempt our 'mental name book' to avoid an occasion for future embarrassment! Now, how in the world does one do that? Simplest way would be to carry a small notebook with a pen to make note of someone that you have just been introduced to, at a meeting or a social do. Our friends often introduce us to people and chances are that if there is no occasion to remember that person, then the brain fades it out of its memory list, as it will only use up space on the brain's 'hard disk.' Human memory might be jogged to remember trivia from 25 years ago in great detail, but ask a simple question - remember what you had for lunch last Tuesday?  - and that would be very difficult to answer, especially if last Tuesday was just an ordinary day with no special reference points around lunchtime to help you remember. Maybe if something momentous had occurred on Tuesday last, like pretty Meg from next door, sharing lunch with you rather unexpectedly, then you can bet your bottom dollar you will remember what you had on the day in question. So create reference points! When you are introduced to someone, first and foremost, reference it with who introduced you and then try and make a reference of at least one unique distinguishing feature in that person. Now you don't really require the eye of a physiognomist, and it would be mighty impolite to stare hard for the "distinguishing feature" coin to drop. So a quick look and you got 'long nose Mary Gomez' all referenced and ready for recall at the next chance meeting. Make the reference phrases funny so that you won't have any problem whatsoever in recalling the name behind the funny phrase when you most require it. Alternatively, try associating a picture with the name if you aren't very good with phrase reminders. These techniques are called mnemonics, which is pronounced ni-mon-nics, and funnily enough the very curious spelling - Mnemonics makes you want to have a picture card memory association for the right pronunciation. A mnemonic for this could be 'knee-moan- knicks". Easy enough, i.e., if you remember the sequence right. You could also try memory exercises with names picked off from the telephone directory at random. Pick an A-lister say - 'Anderson' and then flick through to D and pick 'Dougherty' and so on until you have picked at least 10 names of a different alphabet. Now, try and write down the numbers that you must have undoubtedly memorized until now. You can consider yourself blessed even if you are able to memorize the number of the third person by the time you reach person number 10. This will give you a memory for names and numbers at least. Or, go through any university web sites and look at the photo galleries of past alumni. Give yourself 1 minute to quickly glance at all the names on the page. Then try and recall the name by applying the memory picture association or develop your own technique. With regular practice, you could well be in the employ of the local police to help identify criminals off a line up. If that's too dangerous for you, then at least that will  keep your brain alert and active with this brain gym and help avoid any boo-boos in the future.
How to say 'Bye' to split ends? Check out these 10 tips!One of the main reasons for split ends is the use of curling irons and other heat-induced styling treatments. When you go for hair products like hair colors or perms, the shield over your hair's shaft that protects it can get stripped off, thus making your hair liable to split ends. You could also be mechanically stressing your hair by pulling them too much while combing or combing repeatedly. Remember that rubbing your hair up towards the direction of the scalp does not lead to split ends. While there is no remedy to treat split ends, there are ways in which you can keep them away. Did you know that a medical research showed that the only way to keep split ends away is to put a stop on the excessive use of chemical on it? Hairdresser, Holly Kensen, says that split ends are the results of pushing out the natural process and pulling in too many chemicals. It is best to stay away from the styling products and embrace your natural hair! TIP 1 : Get hold of a piece of rosemary (fresh ones are the best!) and immerse them in a cup of hot water for 30 minutes. Once the temperature of the water is back to normal, whisk an egg into it. Mix this blend onto your hair. Rinse after 15 minutes using a light shampoo. TIP 2 : Bring home a ripe papaya and cut it into halves. Choose the part which you believe will be sufficient for your hair. Take off the skin and seeds. Mash it until it becomes a paste. Then, drop a cup of yogurt and stir them into a smooth paste. Apply it on your hair and let it hold for about 30 minutes. Use cold water to rinse it off. TIP 3 : Condition your hair with castor oil. Mix equal amounts of castor, almond, and olive oil and apply it on your hair generously. Wrap your hair in a towel and let it stay for 30 minutes. Then, shampoo your hair. TIP 4 : After you have shampooed your hair, apply a mix of cream and milk on them for about 20 minutes. Focus especially on the ends. Rinse your hair with cold water. TIP 5 :If you decide to trim your hair on your own, then don't use the paper scissors! They are called 'paper' scissors for a reason. Get hold of hair shears which will not leave your ends damaged. TIP 6 : Trim your hair every six to eight weeks at least up to ¼ to 1 inch. Due to our environment, it is natural for the hair to get damaged in a few weeks. It is important to remove the split ends and let them grow healthy. TIP 7 : Do not trust products which say that they can 'cure' your split ends. Split ends are not curable. They are preventable. The only thing that these products do is to seal up the splits which only makes your hair unhealthy. TIP 8 : Try to stay away from chemicals as much as you can. Chemicals only tamper with your natural hair and ruin their texture. If you really have to use it then make sure you condition them regularly. TIP 9 : Use coconut oil to fix your split ends. Buy an extra-virgin and organic coconut oil. Before washing your hair, apply about 2 spoons of the oil on your dry hair. Emphasize on the hair ends. If you want, you can steam your hair for some time (about 20 minutes). Then, wash your hair with a light shampoo and condition them. TIP 10 :This is one of the best ways to help your split ends stay away: Get hold of chamomile tea and brew it on a pot. Then pre-rinse your hair with it. After you have rinsed them, wash and condition your hair normally.
High fiber foods and their benefitsFiber has many health benefits and that is why it is important to include fiber in your diet. However, if you are not used to fiber in your diet then introduce it slowly or it could cause indigestion and gas. Fibers are good for overall health and help to boost the immune system and help prevent a number of diseases. The digestive health benefits of fiber : If bowel movements are regular, then fibers will prevent both constipation and diarrhea. Regular movements flush out excessive cholesterol as well as harmful toxins from the intestines which could also be carcinogenic. Fiber helps to reduce inflammation of the intestines, could bring relief from irritable bowel syndrome and prevent piles, ulcers, and acidity. The benefits to the heart Soluble fiber is good for the heart. Fiber reduces the bad cholesterol levels (LDL). It helps to lower blood pressure, improves the levels of good cholesterol (HDL). Fibers reduce the risk of stroke also. These factors are good for heart heath. Weight Loss Fiber can help you to lose weight as it makes you feel fuller for longer which means you will eat less. High-fiber fruits and vegetables have lower calories, so by adding these to your diet cuts calories which could aid in weight loss. Eat 21 to 38 grams of fiber per day depending on your age and gender. Diabetes If you already suffer from type II diabetes then you should have soluble fiber as it slows down the absorption of sugar and can help to maintain blood sugar levels. Regulating blood sugar can also reduce the risk of kidney and gallbladder stones. Cancer prevention Though research is still ongoing, but the general conclusion is that eating fiber foods keeps the colon in a better condition and this could prevent colon cancer. However, it does prevent digestive tract cancer. The more fiber you eat the more fluids you should drink as that helps to absorb fiber better. Good for the skin Eating fiber is good for the skin as they help to flush out toxins from your body which otherwise cause acne. Besides eating a lot of fruits and vegetables produce antioxidants that are good for your skin. Some tips Start your day with fiber as it keeps you full and sugar levels just right to keep you energetic. Try to replace white rice, bread, and pasta with brown rice and whole grain products. Eat seeds, nuts, and flaxseeds either whole or ground and sprinkle some on fruit, yoghurt, or cereal. Add beans and legumes to your diet as often as possible. Eat whole fruits instead of juice. Insoluble fiber can be found in foods like whole grains, wheat, cereals, and vegetables such as carrots, celery, and tomatoes. Whereas soluble fibers are found in barley, oatmeal, beans, nuts, and fruits such as apples, berries, citrus fruits, and pears. Foods like meat, dairy, and sugar have no fiber and some foods like white rice, white bread, and pastries have no fiber either because it has got removed because of refining.
MigraineA Severely painful persistent headache can put anyone in distress. Migraine symptoms vary from person to person. Some people get intimation before the pain begins. It can be sparkling flashes of light, blind spots, or distortions. Some others experience tingling or "pins-and-needles" sensation in hands or face. This is called an aura. The headache begins within 30 minutes of seeing an aura and may last for 4 to 72 hours. Extreme sensitivity to light, noise, smells, nausea and vomiting, loss of appetite and fatigue, numbness, tingling, or weakness are all-common in migraine. There is no permanent solution to migraines. People suffer for years together and keep on taking painkillers for a long time. Pain killer helps only if taken right at the beginning of the headache. Keep a watch on things that trigger the migraine and try to avoid them. Make some lifestyle changes that can help prevent migraines to some extent. Taking good sleep. Lack of sleep can cause migraine. Appropriate hours of sleep as a routine will help to prevent the attacks. Regular meals at fixed time help to prevent migraines in people who get headaches due to hunger or not eating on time. Regular exercises help to rejuvenate the body and prevent migraines along with many other diseases. Stress is another important cause for migraines. Avoid stress. Learning to manage it will keep migraine at bay. Caffeine triggers migraine in many. Avoid caffeine. Reduce it if quitting is not possible. Limiting alcohol will again be very beneficial as alcohol and hangovers can be the cause. Meditation and relaxation therapies may also help prevent migraine headaches.  
Are long hours of work bad for your sex life?As researchers in 'Occupational Health' indicate that working more than 8 hours a day could seriously shorten your life span by inviting all sorts of ailments like heart disease, sleep deprivation, chronic fatigue syndrome among others, it could very well mean sounding the death knell on your love life! So how does work affect play? The stress that goes with long work hours could certainly lower sex drive leading to feelings of frustration and inadequacy amongst partners. 'Erectile dysfunction' and lack of sexual desire are now on the increase amongst men with high pressure jobs and fancy designations. This in turn adds more strain on the relationship as partners naturally feel spurned due to the general lack of intimacy and sex. There is also the added danger of extra marital affairs as hours away from home can increase the chances of one night stands or casual sex thereby increasing the risk of STDs and sexual guilt which can only spell doom on the home front. So if you are a busy person this is what you can do to keep your bed from crumbling: Take a break now and again from work to call your spouse or partner. This can indicate that though you are busy he/she is foremost on your mind. Do not sacrifice your weekly offs as this is the time that your body, mind and spirit need all the healing that they could possibly get at the hands of your mate. Try and involve your mate as much as possible on what is happening at the work place. This way your contribution at your work place can be appreciated and can lessen the grouse, somewhat, like you are never available and similar other complaints. Preferably keep time for making love. These moments of intimacy are really what makes life worth living and should be given as much prominence as your promotions and annual appraisal. Do not miss out on your meals and exercise routine that ensure that despite hectic work pressures, you can still summon up enough energy to make love. Try a relationship counsellor to help you fine tune your work schedule to your home life.  
The earlier yearsSexual concerns experienced during the drastic body changes and feelings of adolescence are often carried into adulthood. Sexual desires are powerful and frequently go beyond the earlier popular forms of sexual expression - kissing, hugging and petting without being aware of the consequences. Anxiety the commonest case of erectile dysfunction is compounded by the present life style - get-togethers, parties, with alcohol and drugs, visits to sex workers or massage parlours which offer other sexual services leading to unplanned, unprotected sex. Consequently seen are unwanted pregnancy, abortions, drug addiction, sexually transmitted diseases, anxiety and depression leading sometimes to suicide. Males seem to have more concerns then females. A common concern is nocturnal emission (night fall, Swapana Dosh) of semen and length of penis. Nocturnal emission of spermatic fluid is falsely believed to weaken a person. Really all that's happening is that excess of sperms is being thrown out to make place for the new ones. The length of the penis troubles many. Young people fall prey to advertisements that claim to lengthen it. The fact of the matter is that a penis an erection of 2.5 wide (10cms) is enough for a sexual intercourse for a person who knows the art to satisfy a partner. Ignorance about masturbation is widely prevalent among males of all ages leading to guilt, anxiety, depression and at times to suicide. Older men erroneously think their cause of erectile dysfunction or premature ejaculation is masturbation. Masturbation is a highly pleasurable act in males. It does not harm the body or exhaust the sperms. In fact it is a safe way to satisfy. Females also masturbate but the percentage to men is much less. They also seem more comfortable with the activity. Masturbation has gone through years of superstition fear of ill effects, considered as a unhealthy practice and considered sin by some religions. Fifty or more years ago doctors and activities thought it caused harm to the body. It is said that corn flakes, the popular breakfast cereal was specifically formulated by Mr. Keleog to help a person not to masturbate. Today thinking has changed. It is now thought that it is an activity that does not cause any harm to the body. It does not finish all the vital sperms over the years so that it will not hinder having children in future. Its wide misuse is common. Persons use it indiscriminatingly when they cannot sleep, when they are tense for e.g. before an examination, some do it more than four to six times a day, which only indicates their immaturity. When done to satisfy a natural sexual urge it is a healthy activity. It keeps the person safe from infection and is said to teach the person skill for sexual intercourse. Technology has helped in many ways but sometimes it creates problems. A person hooked on to porno sites to arouse his desire is found to cause a loss of self confidence conflict with the partner sexual intimacy and intercourse. Before marriage or a partnership both male and female have concerns. Females if they have a previous partner but are getting married to another worry about the husband finding out of their loss of virginity, others worry about the size of their breasts, excessive hair on body or excessive fear of pain at intercourse. Men worry about whether their penis is long enough whether their long standing masturbation will hinder intercourse or prevent them of being a father. The absent hymen a false notion for virginity can be congenitally absent, split by exercise like swimming, cycling etc. or most commonly by masturbation. The hymen therefore is no proof of virginity. Learning to do with what they have making full use of their points and feeling comfortable and proud of their bodies help a lot to overcome the concern. Adopting a safe sex policy is best achieved by masturbation; avoiding sex with an unknown person and multiple partners; during intercourse with sex workers not using condoms every time and being careful of oral sex. Satisfying each other by caressing, hugging, kissing etc. with clothes on is safe; without clothes extra vaginal sex by mutual masturbation is safe with a trusted partner and finally not so safe is vaginal intercourse unless done with a condom correctly worn.
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