Home
Is male menopause a reality?As opposed to the sudden drop in ovulation and hormonal levels in women, menopause in men is a gradual process. The consequences in men aren't that clear. The health risks, though, are significant and it is important to recognize the symptoms of male menopause early on. Read along to know more. A testosterone level of 300-1200 ng/dL is considered normal in a healthy male. As one ages, the testosterone levels too drop gradually. After 30 years of age, the levels drop by 1% per year. By the time a man crosses 50 years of age, he is in menopause. Look out for the following signs to know if your testosterone levels are dropping : Low Libido : A low sex drive or decrease in inclination to have sex is the first sign of decreasing testosterone levels. Erectile Dysfunction : Testosterone is responsible for releasing nitric oxide that leads to erection. As the levels of testosterone decrease with age, getting an erection and maintaining it for longer periods of time may become difficult. Low Semen Level : The normal amount of semen ejaculated each time varies between 0.1 and 10 mL. This normal level is due to the efficient functioning of the testes, seminal vesicles, and prostate, all of which work under the influence of testosterone. As you age, the testosterone levels drop and the amount of semen ejaculated also drops. Orgasm Troubles : As you age, having an orgasm every time may be a bit difficult due to the dropping testosterone levels. Mood Swings : This happens in men as much as in women! The interesting thing here is that the man who suffers from it is the last one to note it and acknowledge. So, if you find yourself snapping and getting irritated at the smallest of things, get your testosterone levels checked. Depression : When you feel dull and demotivated at all times, and even doing the slightest of activity seems like a chore, it means that your testosterone levels have dropped to a significantly low level. Abdominal Fat : This is again an early sign of decreasing testosterone level. Belly fat is a sign of advancing age. Low testosterone levels are a sign of advancing age. Not all men who have low testosterone levels may show symptoms. In such cases, there is no need for any kind of treatment. Low testosterone may also be due to some other conditions like thyroid disease, excessive alcohol use, sleep apnea, etc. After 30 years of age, the levels of testosterone drop by 1% per year. By the time a man crosses 50 years of age he is in menopause. Identifying and eliminating these causes will restore the testosterone levels to normal. However, if no cause can be attributed to the low testosterone levels, it is a clear indication of normal aging and 'menopause.' As with women, men too have the option of hormone replacement therapy. However, this treatment is controversial. In some men, the testosterone replacement may relive several symptoms, but the risks far outweigh the benefits. An increased chance of heart attack, prostate cancer, and other health problems are associated with testosterone replacement therapy. Herbal supplements for problems associated with decreasing testosterone levels are generally considered safe, but they too have no proven health benefits and are known to increase the risks for prostate cancer. Male menopause isn't as dramatic and abrupt as the menopause in women, but it is a reality. It happens gradually over a period of several years.
Are you the proud owner of this beer belly?While you must have earned a lot of 'brownie pints', a beer gut is not quite something one can be awfully proud of, as it is positively dangerous for your health. Well for one this condition seems to be a common affliction amongst men more than women (though it isn't entirely unknown for women to guzzle beer). A beer gut is normally found in middle aged men as a token for services rendered to a sedentary lifestyle and hours spent accumulating empty calories. How is a beer belly formed? A protruding mid-section in men is generally formed when they consume more than they burn off. So given a busy lifestyle with very little exercise and discretion one generally can end up consuming lot many calories than one is willing to toss out. According to Dr Michael Jensen MD, endocrine and obesity expert at the Mayo clinic, the liver burns calories earned from alcohol instead of the existing fat. So say, if an average beer is around 150 calories plus all the tiny appetizers one has along with the beer (Pizzas, cuts, chips etc.) one can easily understand how these go about accumulating around the belly area in to a paunch. And because the liver was all too busy burning the calories guzzled from the beer, the rest finds a cozy place to settle around the tummy. This is exactly what gives majority of men and some women the infamous paunch or beer gut! GIVE YOUR PAUNCH A PUNCH IN THE FACE Well for starters be a giver and not a taker. Which means give more time to exercise like running, cycling, swimming, skipping, dancing or aerobics which should take care of visceral fat (which is easiest to shake off, by the way). As one ages their calorie needs go down, but then so do their physical activity levels and this is where the fat creeps in. Stick to light beer if you must but do not miss your exercise regimen for anything in the world.  
Infertility at workplaceSince infertility among the younger age is increasing, it is important that a couple decides an early suitable date to attempt conception. Time and again it has been found that infrequency of intercourse is the cause of delayed pregnancy. It is advisable that the woman has a thorough examination by the gynecologists to identify the ovulation dates and for the man to have a thorough spermatic fluid check.  If both are normal then they could wait for a suitable date later. Should there be a problem the quicker it is attended to better. Also, early in the marriage they should start a fund which could be utilized for matters related to conception. For the male, the main treatment covers his personal sex life and a detailed examination of his spermatic fluid. It is the female who has to undergo many detailed tests and possibly surgeries which are expensive. It is often seen that not only the procedures for both take a toll on their personal and intimate relationship but also severely affect their finances which may come to a point that it does not allow them to complete the treatment as for e.g. the woman undergoing IVF may costs several lakhs of rupees. The treatment of infertility has improved greatly, but interferes severely with the work schedule. Working couples particularly women may have a hard time keeping to their schedules. Depending on their infertility diagnosis, many workplace challenges exist including the need to take time off to undergo tests and other appointments. It is difficult to balance the medical and surgical procedures with daily life and work. This is a difficult issue for many people as they fear their employer may discriminate against them for taking time off from work. Sadly in India there are very few employers who include medical benefits and cost of treatment for infertility. Suggestions have been given on stress dealing with infertility treatment and work. Here are few pitfalls to avoid: Do Your Homework: Review your organization's HR policies so you understand the amount of leave you have and other policies that pertain to your situation. You may be able to arrange for flex time or work from home on the days of your appointments, so that you do not actually miss any work. Be Honest:  Go to supervisor and let her or him know that you will be using your leave time and will give as much notice as possible. Honesty is the best policy. Remember people are inherently curious about the disease of infertility. If you feel the questions are invasive and make you feel uncomfortable, remember you do not have to answer the questions. You can respond nicely and let them know that you appreciate their concern but you are not ready to answer any questions. Your co-workers are asking question because it is human nature to be curious. In conclusion, not everyone needs to know what is happening with your reproductive health. At work place should medical help be available do take advantage of it.  This treatment has nothing to do with your performance at work. Go to work feeling confident that you will be able to perform your job and handle your workload during this time.
Smell like roses, without the thornsYou bathe regularly and use the best possible deodorants, underarm anti-perspirants, panty perfume but the bad odour just doesn't go away. Pat yourself dry Very often you have a leisurely bath with scented bubbles and what not but when it comes to drying your body thoroughly, well you just pat yourself quickly, for you are in a hurry. The moisture on your body then attracts bacteria with fungi and they cause that embarrassing mouldy kind of stench on your body. So make sure you dab yourself thoroughly dry all over your body. Especially in places like the lower back where it is difficult to reach without some really flexible shoulder joints. Use the archer's swipe (The towel extended between the right hand over the head with  the left hand extended back to form the bottom grip, which looks like an archer reaching for a bow from the quiver). In case you are endowed with love handles and folds of fat then be generous with the patting, as those are the parts most susceptible to host bacteria. Change clothes often If you wear the same set of clothes and lingerie then you are surely going to have an odour which is lingering. So for those ladies who occasionly wear the same set of clothes without washing, the sweat is going to accumulate in there and raise a stink. Remember the Celine Dion song? It's a new day, a new start! Menstruation + Stress = Bad smell There is nothing that you can really do about your periods. Instead, try and be a little more extra careful during those 4 days. You can have an extra jab at the deo bottle or perfume lotion. However stress, nervousness and fear also leave chemical traces which come out along with the sweat. This adds to the bad odour. Humble pie for dessert? What you eat also affects the way you smell. Go easy on the garlic, onion rings and fish for they can make you smell slightly worse than an open sewer. Always rinse your mouth after eating and use a good minty mouthwash if at all you choose to pepper your meal with onion and garlic to ward offthe evil eye. You can add conditions like diabetes to cause a fruity kind of odour. Well in that case make sure you exercise regularly so that the skin sweats out the toxins. In case you are the extra-sweaty types then use medicated soaps or ensure you use steam baths regularly to keep your skin pores open.
A correctable disfigurement of face: Cleft lip and palateThe Times of India reports that "With an incidence of 7 per 1000 children, cleft lip and palate deformity is one of the most common deformities among Indian children." The number of infants born every year with cleft lip and cleft palate in India is 28,600. This means 78 affected infants are born every day or 3 infants with clefts are born every hour. Cleft lip and palate develop early in pregnancy where lack of adequate amounts of tissues lead to two parts of the face failing to join adequately at the middle. A cleft lip or hare lip (as it is commonly called) refers to separation of the two sides of the upper lip. There appears a narrow opening or gap over the skin of the upper lip. This separation may sometimes extend beyond the base of the nose and may involve the upper gum and/or the bones of the upper jaw. A cleft palate refers to the gap between the two edges of the roof of the mouth, causing it to remain open at birth. The bony front portion of the roof of the mouth or the hard palate may be involved alone, or along with the soft palate or the soft back portion of the roof of the mouth. Since lip and the palate develop separately, it is possible to have a cleft lip without a cleft palate or vice versa. Causes of developing cleft lip and cleft palate: The exact cause of cleft lip and palate is unknown. Some research, however, suggests that these clefts are caused by a combination of genetic and environmental factors. The risk of such clefts thus can be reduced by adopting a healthy lifestyle during pregnancy. This includes avoidance of smoking, alcohol and having a healthy diet to avoid excessive weight gain during pregnancy. Cleft lip and palate can occur alone with no other problems or defects. This is called non-syndromic clefts. They may also occur as part of other birth defects and then may be called part of a syndrome. Cleft lip and palate may occur on one side (unilateral) or may occur on both sides (bilateral). Unilateral cleft lip and palate is more common than bilateral cleft lip and palate. Left-sided cleft lip and palate is twice as common as right-sided cleft lip and palate. The reason for this is unclear. A cleft lip or combined cleft lip and palate are seen more commonly in male babies. Cleft palate alone is more common in female babies. The face of the baby usually develops around 5th and 9th weeks of pregnancy thus this defect may arise early in pregnancy. Treatment of cleft lip and palate: Cleft lip and palate is usually corrected using cosmetic or plastic surgery. Results are usually very good. After treatment, most children have a normal appearance. To prevent and correct associated speech problems and dental problems, treatment is also sought from speech and language therapists, as well as dental surgeons (orthodontic specialists). Excellent results may be seen if the specialists work in tandem.
Your child is ready for school... but are you?It was still okay. Just 2-3 hours which you could utilize for other things while your child was away briefly. Now you will have to compete along with teachers, textbooks and homework for your child's attention. Well Mother, we know this is going to be difficult for you, but let's see if we can try and make it any easier. Think of school as an extension of the tender loving care that you provided. The only difference is that the TLC will go towards nurturing and developing his/her brain and help it learn important skills which will help gain a balanced development. At this point your child feels bad and completely unsafe in this new hostile world of teachers and uniforms and what not! If you weaken at this point your child will cop on and then will come the emotional blackmail. So explain the importance of school to your child as it will make the transition easier. It is always good for mothers to accompany their children to school but imagine watching mother walk away and all hell can break loose. So if your child's school has a school bus facility you can walk him to the bus stop and then say your goodbyes there. A lump in the throat at the bus stop is preferable any day than a scene at school with a child holding on to mother for dear life. Do not criticize your child's school or assignments given by them as children can catch on quite quickly and that can be reason enough for them not to concentrate on school activities. Always encourage your child to talk about what he did at school and ask him questions about his friends and teachers. This gives the impression that school is as important as home and gradually even you will reconcile yourself to the fact that school is here to stay.
Not very chummy! Menophobia - The fear of periodsMenstruation or periods begin as female reaches puberty. This is the time when there are hormonal changes which occur in the body as nature takes the girl and makes her ready for womanhood. The onset of periods can be distressful with lots of mood swings accompanied by abdominal cramps, bloated feet as the menstrual blood flows. This is also a time when the girl needs to be comforted and educated the most, as it can be truly a terrifying experience. Normally mothers or elder women in the family ensure that they take complete care of the girl in this transition phase. For some women, their initial experience with periods may not have been particularly pleasant, causing them to actually dread those 4 days and this fear can then take the shape of a full blown phobia -Menophobia! The reason could vary. For some the pain factor could be the reason for menophobia, while for others, it could be the memory of embarrassing red stains on the clothes which could set it off. In menophobia, just before the onset of the periods, the person starts getting anticipatory anxiety and the pain which could be normal period pain, is then imagined to be ten times worse. This brings on panic attacks and feeling of utter dread which while is entirely psychological can be utterly distressful and downright crippling. Counseling can help greatly along with pain medication to manage the pain and the fear of this natural phenomenon called periods. In therapy, this is what is iterated. That menstruation is a completely natural process and if there is a fear of menstrual blood then gradually, the woman is encouraged to accept it as a natural body function which plays a major part of her being a woman.
Mood disordersMood disorder is a category of mental health problems, and it includes all types of depression and bipolar disorder. The cause of mood disorder is not well known. Endorphins in brain are responsible for positive moods. The neurotransmitters regulate endorphins. Depression and other mood disorders are caused by a chemical imbalance in the brain. Life events such as unwanted changes in life may also contribute to a depressed mood. Mood disorders are inherited. Children, adolescents, or adults who have a parent with a mood disorder have a greater chance of also having a mood disorder. Symptoms: Prolonged feeling of sadness Helpless feeling Low self-esteem Intense guilt Suicidal thoughts Loss of interest in daily activities Difficulty with relationships Disturbed sleep Change in appetite or weight Low energy Inability in concentrating Inability to make decisions Frequent physical complaints (i.e., headache, stomach ache, fatigue) Threats of running away from home Hypersensitivity to failure or rejection Irritability Aggressive behaviour Hostility In mood disorders, these feelings appear more intense than what a person may normally feel from time to time. Treatment Psychotherapy: It is focused on changing the individual's distorted views of themselves and the environment around them, working through difficult relationships, and identifying stress triggers in their environment and how to avoid them. Family therapy: Families play a vital supportive role in any treatment process. Antidepressant medications: Medications in combination with psychotherapy has shown to be very effective in the treatment of depression.
Muscle build up dietYou may think that you need fatty foods to bulk up, but this is not true. Fatty foods will do just that make you fat. Lean meats, fruits and vegetables will actually build muscle. Take a balanced diet of vegetables and lean meats to achieve your muscle building goals. Changing your diet to build muscle will help with your overall health. Eating food that helps build muscle will ensure that you are not wasting all that hard work you are doing in the gym. Workout utilizes considerable energy. Food is the only way to replace this energy. So what happens if you fail to eat the right type of food to build muscle mass? It will take longer to build muscle, and it may even prevent muscle building altogether once you reach a certain point. Is protein important or not? You bet it is. Protein provides the building blocks to build that muscle. What types of protein are best? Chicken, eggs, steak (with the fat cut off), fish, cheese (especially cottage cheese), and nuts are all great sources of protein. Finding out how much protein to eat when you are interested in building muscle fast is actually not difficult. First, you will need to find out your lean body mass weight in kilos, and then you simply multiply that figure by 2.75 to determine your daily protein requirement. Calculating your lean body mass uses some complex formulae, so ask a professional at the gym if you do not already have this figure. Carbohydrates, in moderation, are also essential when finding foods that build muscle. Do not eat too much, though, unless you choose high fibre carbohydrates, and then you can indulge in much larger amounts. High fibre carbs include rice, potatoes, oatmeal and bananas. Reducing fat in your diet is of course necessary to build bigger muscle on a body that appears lean and has a low body fat ratio. If you are focusing on what foods build muscle mass, you also need to bear in mind that it pays to reduce fat as well. Although proteins are essential, it is really important to select proteins that are low in fat, or that you can cut the fat off. So eat your chicken without the skin, and go for lean steaks rather than more fatty cuts of meat. Opting for cottage cheese or other reduced fat cheeses, and low fat milk also helps reduce your fat intake. You may argue that drinking has no effect on what to eat to build muscle. But you would be wrong. Hydration is critical to general health and wellbeing. Two litres of water a day is what most experts recommend for maintaining optimal health. To drink that amount, you need to drink up to 12 glasses of water a day, which is quite a lot. So start early in the day, and space your water consumption out throughout the day. Foods that build muscle are great and an essential component of your bodybuilding program. But do not be lulled into a false sense of security and think you can slow down on your workouts. Both bodybuilding exercises and bodybuilding diets are required to get a body to die for as quickly as you possibly can. Even if you are working on improving your physique slowly, you should combine a bodybuilding diet with bodybuilding workouts for best results. Sample Diet: 7:00am: Breakfast: 4 eggs + toast or oatmeal + milk with protein powder mixed in (a lot). 9:30am: Snack: 1 Meal replacement supplement + milk. 12:00: Lunch: Tuna sandwich (1 whole can) + green apple. 3:00pm: Snack:  2 Meal replacement supplement + milk. 5:30pm: Workout: Have water (or carb drink if you want), within 30 mins of end of workout (on workout days only) Meal replacement supplement + milk. (If you are going to have Creatine - put it in this Meal replacement supplement at the end of your workout). 8:30pm: Dinner: A chicken breast (aprox 8 oz + some rice or other starch carb + if you want also eat some veggies) Before Bed:  Meal replacement supplement + milk.
5 cardinal sins for the skinWhile cigarettes may not constitute food in the strictest sense, it does have a profound effect on skin complexion, health, color and tone. We eat that we may live, but sometimes we eat way too much and consume stuff that may be extremely hazardous to our health. Since we are talking about skin, here are 5 most hazardous foods for your skin: Grease adds to the crease Since healthy skin is all about healthy blood circulation, any food which is likely to clog up the blood vessels internally is deemed bad for skin tone. Packaged snacks like potato chips may have edible oil written in bold but this contributes significantly to the slowing down of 'collagen and elastin syntheses' which in turn causes the skin to appear aged and all wrinkly. The french fries that we consume as a TV snack can also cause an acne outbreak on the skin and face. Gluten Glutton Gluten is a substance found in wheat and other food grains. We may not even be aware that some of the food grains have gluten as a main constituent. Gluten intolerance can also cause inflammations on the skin in the form of rashes or acne. Bad news is that the pizzas, pastas, cakes and bread that we get off the rack may be heavy in gluten (Surprised that they don't say that on the pack) and that may be the reason for you to lose precious skin tone. So seek gluten free foods, though that might not be the easiest of tasks, but for your skin, it certainly will be worth it. Caffeine - the skin coffin If you are one of those coffee addicts then you may as well write an obituary column lamenting the loss of your skin tone and complexion. It's not without reason that health freaks love bashing coffee beans and caffeine rich beverages, as they are truly hazardous. How? Studies have proven that just 2-3 cups stimulate pituitary-adrenocortical response. Yes, but what does that have to do with your skin? Well this leads to the hormone cortisol to increase in our bodies. Cortisol is known as the stress hormone! So now here's what it does to your skin -it accelerates the ageing process which means wrinkled skin and causes dehydration causing the skin to show an unusual pallor. So before you turn the coffee faucet on think twice. Fad to Black How fad diets are not skin friendly? Some people go on a high protein, low-carb diet which could sound the death knell as far as complexion goes. Dieting depletes calcium levels, which means your bones are going to suffer and what's the point of having skin on bad bone density? Besides low-carb diets can utterly wreck the complexion as the delicate PH balance in the skin is ruined. Some of the meat, poultry and dairy products too can have artificial chemicals injected in them which cause a hormonal imbalance in our bodies leading to skin disasters. Fruits and vegetables have chemicals injected too sometimes! Beware! Cereal Killers Cereal killers are those people who ignore the need of a proper diet for skin health. So anybody who indulges in too much sugar, caffeine and greasy food stuffs is a 'Cereal Killer' A lack of cereals in the diet can literally kill your skin. Cereal foods have high fiber and antioxidants for moisturizing the skin and protecting it from skin damage. For great skin other than cereals which are simply fabulous for keeping skin hydrated and breathing easily, one can eat fruits, olive oil, healthy fats, almonds, tofu, grains, nuts and the good old vitamin B rich products. Ceramides in raw food diets, organic foods, wheat germ and brown rice protect the epidermis of the skin and make it impervious to external attacks and pollutants while maintaining their tone and beauty.
A quick guide to high blood pressureWhat is blood pressure? Blood pressure is the force or pressure exerted by blood on the walls of arteries while flowing through it. What is normal? A blood pressure value of 120/80 mm Hg is ideally said to be the normal. The upper value (systolic) reads the pressure when the heart beats (squeezes to pump the blood). The lower value (diastolic) computes pressure at rest in between the heartbeats when the heart refills with blood. What is hypertension or high blood pressure? The condition in which the pressure of blood in the arteries is persistently high.More the pressure, harder the heart has to work to pump the blood. The prolonged and too high blood pressure (BP) raises the heart's work persistently and can lead to grave damage to the arteries. This eventually leads to uncontrolled high blood pressure raising the risk of heart disease, stroke, and kidney disease in the long run.A blood pressure above 130/90 mm Hg is said to be high. What are the symptoms of hypertension? Hypertension can go unnoticed without any symptoms and thus remain untreated for years altogether. Thus, it is also called as silent killer sometimes. What causes hypertension? The cause of hypertension is unknown in most of the cases. Sometimes, hypertension occurs secondary to kidney disease or adrenal gland disease. Who are at risk of getting high BP? The risk of developing high blood pressure is more in people above the age of 45, those who have close relatives already suffering from hypertension, and who have history of diabetes, Many people consistently have blood pressure above normal, yet not so high to be called as hypertension (130-140 /80-90). These people are at more risk of developing hypertension. Is salt and blood pressure are related? Sodium content of salt causes water retention thus putting more burden on heart and raising blood pressure. So watch the foods you eat for sodium content and stick to a low-sodium diet. Stress and high blood pressure Stress can increase the blood pressure, but no scientific facts to suggest that it causes hypertension. Stress can lead to addictions, poor diet, lack of sleep which can indirectly contribute to high blood pressure and heart disease. Obesity and hypertension Obesity strains heart and raises the risk. Losing every kilo makes a huge difference. Alcohol  Alcohol can surely raise blood pressure and limiting it mandatory. Pregnancy and hypertension High blood pressure during pregnancy is called as gestational hypertension. It can cause serious complications like preeclampsia. It can harm both the mother and baby. It can compromise oxygen flow to the baby. The blood pressure normalizes after child's birth. Medicines and hypertension Some medicines, like pain killers, birth control pills, steroids, flu medicines etc. can cause the blood pressure to rise. Be careful with the medications. Avoid over-the-counter medications and take doctor's advice before consuming any medicine. "White coat" phenomenon Some people show high blood pressure in doctor's clinic due to nervousness. This is called as white coat phenomenon. These people are at risk of developing high blood pressure. Kids and hypertension Kids who are obese and have a family history are more at risk. How to control high blood pressure? Eat healthy: Eat more fresh fruits, vegetables, whole-grain foods, low-fat dairy products, and nuts. Say no to sweets, saturated fats, and excess salt. Exercise: Regular physical activity lowers blood pressure. Atleast 150 minutes of exercise per week is essential. Activities like brisk walking, swimming, cycling or gardening, all count. Reduce stress: Add yoga, meditation, deep breathing. All have proven to lower the blood pressure and keep it normal. Hypertension is usually a chronic life-long condition. It's very essential to take medications, make lifestyle changes and regularly monitor blood pressure. Keeping it under checkwillreducethe potential riskof heart disease, kidney diseases, and stroke.
Is sex linked to self esteem?Man is a curious creature, full of quirks and contradictions. Sexual intercourse, something that most people consider an intimate and private experience, is spoken about in hushed tones and often, with some discomfort. We don't reveal or talk about our sexual desires, as readily we discuss our salary packages or food habits. This is quite ironic seeing how sex is an important gauge for a person's self esteem and also an indicator of his/her social desirability. The very thing that we do under covers, we somehow choose to "keep under cover". The Link between Sex and Self Esteem: Self esteem is an important factor that determines the mental & physical well-being of an individual. All of us have a craving to be understood, liked and appreciated; and these form the equivalent of our basic needs on the inverted pyramid- Food, clothing and shelter. For a human being to flourish and prosper, consumable food, without the mental food of appreciation, is not enough; and sexual intercourse or an intimacy with the opposite sex, is one way of validating that need. Sex therefore, ceases to be just a physical need instilled by nature for the perpetuation of the species, but goes into the larger emotional cum psychological dimension of self actualization and realization. Though some of us might be embarrassed to broach the topic of 'whether or not we are getting enough', the truth is that every human seeks to achieve his sexual potential, even while he or she might, not be aware of it. Most of us have the ability to get the foods matching our taste preferences onto our plates, but with sex, this could be a little difficult, since sex, is a complex subject with a lot of social, moral and religious links. The truth is evident in the number of marriages (the very cornerstones of civil society) that fail on the basis of sexual compatibility, either by setting unrealistic sexual expectations or by not owning up to, or even identifying, one's sexual needs. This has repercussions on the psyche and self-esteem of a person, and this is especially true in the case of men in particular, as they may feel completely inferior for not being able to attract a sexual partner matching his desires. In some people, this also leads to a case of self-loathing, for having sexual needs which a partner doesn't understand, or much worse, needs which are considered taboo and sinful (Homosexuality, Anal Sex, Group Sex, Fetishes, etc.) These complex emotions can wreak  havoc on a person's self-esteem, by creating severe internal conflicts and serious self-doubts. Now socially, sex can either liberate a person, or hold him prisoner. At times, the unfulfilled needs may get repressed and banished to the shadows, only to be played out later, in the form of sexual adventurism and crime. Just one look at the sexual crimes in our society today, and we can clearly understand just how healthy our collective self esteem is! The very society that frowns upon prostitution, is actually responsible for creating it, though everybody would like to pretend otherwise. The crux of the matter is that "sex" and "self esteem" are closely related; and one should not shy away from addressing any issues one might face regarding one's sexuality. Physical love is necessary for the survival of a relationship and one needs to make time and efforts to successfully create one's own sexual space. The positive effects of a good sex life can be seen in an increased work productivity, fewer illnesses and an increase in one's overall efficiency. Some people are haunted by sexual guilt and confusion and when they keep it all locked up, they suffer from unexplained physical pains and feel 'down in the dumps' mentally. Another problem with appreciation from the opposite sex, is the addiction to  external validation. Some people feel utterly worthless until they receive positive feedback about their looks or abilities on a regular basis. This can be downright devastating, as in these cases, there is a great dependence on external factors for one to feel good. While no one denies the "feel good factor" of sexual appreciation, it is up to each one of us, to decide just how much of control one must be giving to external factors, to determine our personal self-esteem. The appreciation may be theirs, but the esteem is entirely of the self and only the self can decide how much of appreciation and sex is enough.
How to talk about STDsThese are dangerous times that we live in. Just the sheer number of people affected by sex related problems, diseases and conditions all over the world is simply terrifying. AIDS, venereal infections like syphilis and gonorrhea, herpes, HPV etc. are rampant and it calls for some responsible sexual behavior. However, that's a utopian world where humans will be monogamous and will behave responsibly. Even single people might get exposed to these diseases through indulging in risky sexual contact. Imagine doling out $750,000, as a woman in the US got from her husband because he gave her herpes. Even if you are not held legally accountable, what about moral responsibility to own up and discuss a possible STD infection with your partner! Take the case of Jack a happily married man for ten years who had casual sex when out of town on an official trip. He showed no obvious symptoms of any infection but in a month, his wife showed signs of herpes and his marriage crumbled as his wife struggled to come to terms with her husband's obvious infidelity and his callous manner in exposing her to a serious sexual infection. Call it ignorance but sometimes a person might engage in sexual intercourse and contract a disease which he might even not be aware of until the symptoms start appearing. (Refer article on Syphilis on www.topdoctorsonline.com) By then, he might have, in all probability, passed it on to his regular sexual partner or spouse. Or perhaps, there is another possibility that the person knows that he has contracted a sexual infection but doesn't know how to break the news to his partner.  If a person is aware of his infection, yet exposes another person knowingly, it is akin to premeditated murder. Yes, it is going to be a difficult thing to tell your partner which might even signal the end of the relationship or cause severe strain on it. So, if you are caught in a situation like this, what would you do? The option would be to visit a sex therapist and confide in him and then take an appointment for both and let the professional break it to the partner. That is of course if you are in a stable relationship. For those who both party to casual sex, the infected person generally won't be that open about his infection and may even choose not to care particularly if the other person is a complete stranger. A report in MedlinePlus news reveals some more shocking statistics: Many people said they occasionally, rarely or never got tested before having sex with casual partners (50 percent) or long-term partners (39 percent). Of the people who did discuss STD testing, very few discussed concurrent sexual partners or when partners' testing occurred in relation to their last sex act. Only half explained what types of STDs their partner had been tested for. These issues are important components of assessing STD risk, the researchers said. About one-third of participants reported telling a partner they didn't have an STD even though they hadn't been tested since their last sexual partner. One U.S. woman was awarded $750,000 in court from her ex-husband because he gave her herpes, and the legal trend is to make people accountable. (http://www.dummies.com/how-to/content/how-to-talk-to-a-partner-about-stds.html) Remember even wearing a condom is not a 100% guarantee that the infection won't pass on to the other person but that's the least that you can do if you don't have the courage to spill the beans about your condition. If you feel that your partner may be indulging in sexual activity with multiple partners and if you feel he might be infected, then you are well within your rights to decline to have sex with him until he/she gets tested. If you notice sores around the genitals do not indulge in oral or anal sex or any kind of sex and insist on a condom always; it could save your life.
FAQS
T&C FAQS