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Career advice for menGetting a job these days is extremely difficult. What is even more difficult is sticking around long enough at the job. No one is indispensable, and if you don't perform well, there are hundreds more waiting to get the job! Being the bread winner, men have to face this pressure more. Here are some tips that would do you good, if followed: Cracking The Interview: The golden rule here is to be honest. The interviewers do not want to hear what will please them; So, do not try to butter them up. They are also put off by boasting . Therefore, be honest about your views and opinions. Age:wise Attitude- When you are young, and have just entered the company, it is highly advisable to observe and learn as much as you can. Find yourself a professional mentor who can guide you. Try and build on your professional presence. Be active, spend more time with your boss, be helpful to your juniors. The golden advice for all, irrespective of seniority, is to stay clear of office gossip and politics. Keep a check on the attitude: There is no need to be arrogant, and a know-it-all. Be friendly, confident, and genuine. Learn to say no: You need to have a pleasing personality. But, avoid trying to please all. Try and learn the art of saying no firmly. Too much of 'yes' will make people take you for granted, and you will find yourself overloaded with a lot of work. Do not under price yourself: If you feel that you deserve a raise, go ahead and ask for it. Do not be afraid to ask for your worth. Often at interviews, employers cancel out candidates who under price themselves, as it shows that they will probably not perform to the expected levels. Blow your trumpet: With all humility make sure you take what is rightfully yours. If you don't take credit for the work, no one will give it to you. Worse, someone else may take it! Create boundaries: Keep your work at office. Do not bring work home. Often at the outset, to please bosses, one ends up working overtime or worse, working at home. It is important to keep both the parts of your lives separate. Keep fit too: Don't let your job take a toll on your health. Working late, sitting at the same place for hours, can be harmful for the heart. Learn to unwind periodically. Setting goals is easy. What is needed is the determination to follow the rules you have set for yourself. The way to success at work is taking the ladder, one step at a time. There is no elevator here.
Male infertility : An overview of the causesWhy men shy away from infertility tests? However, it is ideal for both the man and woman of a relationship to get infertility tests done. This would not only avoid unnecessary tests and expenditure later and could also result in prompt medical treatment of the problem. Following an appointment with a urologist/andrologist, the patient is instructed to provide a semen sample for analysis of the quantity and quality of the sperms in the semen. An additional semen test might be recommended for confirmation of the initial results. The semen analysis is an effective method of knowing what is going wrong in the reproductive system : No-sperm count (azoospermia) - Absence of production of sperms or the non-appearance of sperms in the semen. Sperm Morphology Issues - Issues related to the structure and form of the sperm. Low-Semen Production (oligospermia) - Production of low amount of sperms. Sperm Motility Problems - Abnormal movement of sperms resulting in incapacity to fertilize egg. Did you know that use of laptops placed on your thighs can result in increase of scrotal temperature? This could lead to abnormality with sperm production. Thus, using laptops is best when they are located on table or desks, away from constant contact with your genital region. There could also be a primary medical condition, the symptom of which could be manifested reproductively. The physician will suggest blood and urine tests, among others, for the same. There can be 10 major causes of male infertility : Semen : Semen refers to the ejaculated fluid containing sperms during sexual intercourse. There could be low or no count of sperm. It is also possible that the mobility of sperm is restricted. Sterilization : The cutting and sealing off the vas deferens (the tubes which carry the sperms from testicles to the semen) ensuring that your semen does not contain sperms is known as vasectomy. Though this process can be reversed, they are mostly not fruitful. Lack of sperms : Even though the testicles are producing quality sperms, it is possible that they do not reach the semen. The lack of sperms in the semen is medically known as obstructive azoospermia. Such a condition could be caused due to the blocking in one of the constitutive tubes of the reproductive system. This could be further resulting from an infection or a previous surgery. Ejaculation issues : Some men might find it challenging to ejaculate normally due to retrograde (ejaculation of semen into bladder) or premature (ejaculation in very short period of sexual activity) ejaculation. Medicine and drugs : Certain medications have been found to catalyze the onset of infertility. These include sulfasalazine, chemotherapy, anabolic steroids, and herbal remedies (for instance, the consumption of root derivates of Tripterygium wilfordii). The quality of semen can also be negatively affected by illegal drugs like cocaine and marijuana. Testicles : The function of production and storage of the semen lies with the testicles. In case of injury to them, the quality of the semen could be negatively affected. Causes of injury to testicles include a congenital defect, testicular infection, physical trauma, testicular surgery or cancer and undescended testicles (case where one or both of the testicles do not descend into the scrotum). Hypogonadism : This refers to the presence of a very low level of testosterone (male sexual hormone) which plays a major role in production of sperms. This could be due to tumors, Klinefelter's syndrome, or consumption of illegal drugs. Sexually transmitted diseases (STDs) : A series of sexually transmitted illnesses can result in male infertility, for example, chlamydia. Alcohol and weight : Consumption of over 3 to 4 units of alcohol per day can result in infertility in men. Both men and women are affected adversely due to obesity. Occupational factors and stress : Contact with certain types of pesticides, solvents, and metals can result in deterioration of sperm quality. Stress has also been associated with the loss of sexual drive resulting in lesser instances of sexual intercourse. Moreover, in case of severe stress, sperm production can be unfavorably affected.
Leg toning exercises for womenFor those women who will leave 'no stone unturned', here are a few great exercises which work superbly on the legs and whole body. For those who have always wanted a great pair of legs, don't change your jeans brand. Just change your brand of exercise. Here are great leg toning exercises that can make your legs attention grabbers. Well-shaped legs are what every woman desires especially as it signifies 'movement', 'mobility' and 'strength'. When we say legs we mainly mean the thighs, the calves and the feet. To get more precise the quadriceps of the thighs the hamstrings and the hip adductors are the prime targets of most exercises. A complete leg work out would also include the 'Tibialis Anteriors' or the shin muscles. Exercising the legs can be quite a frustrating thing especially if the leg muscles don't show any cosmetic improvement. Here is an exercise regimen which will ensure that you will get those attention-grabbing legs along with the strength, flexibility and tone which you have always desired. The stand This is probably the most undermined exercise of them all since it doesn't involve lugging heavy weights around or running for miles or squatting! It is a foundation exercise for the legs.  Choose your favorite spot on the floor and just stand erect with both feet together and toes pointing forward. Hold the hands straight at the elbows and keep the shoulders square. Tuck the chin in and do not bend your knees. Feel the ground under the feet. Now flex your thigh muscles and keep your feet firmly on the ground. Direct your attention towards the back of your thighs and keep your knees taut. Stand firm for about 3-5 minutes initially and gradually extend to five minutes or more. This exercise is simpler than it actually is as it keeps the thighs taut and firm. The entire leg gets a marvelous stretch and any faulty standing or postural habits create unnecessary tension and uneven hip alignment. The standing pose will be your first step towards trim and well-sculpted legs. The One Leg Extension After you perfect the stand, here is another great leg exerciser - The one leg extension Perform a stand as in the previous exercise for about 30 seconds. Once you get your grounding and feel your foundations beneath the feet, take a deep breath. Now flex your thigh muscles and keep the kneecaps taut without feeling any strain. Bend the left leg at the knee and raise it without bending at the right leg. Now catch hold of the big toe with the left hand and hold the pose for a few breaths. You will initially struggle for balance as you have to keep the other leg straight. Now that you have caught the big toe of the flexed leg gradually straighten the leg out without letting go of your grip. This is a challenging pose especially for the hamstrings, the hip flexors and the calves since the leg muscles are going to be a little tight especially around the hips and the hamstrings. With regular practice, the pain will ease and then you can even try and take the toe towards as high as you can with the aid of your left hand. Repeat with other leg following the same sequence. One Legged Squat The one legged squat is a superior exercise to the two legged variety is that it doesn't require many repetitions as it is quite a strenuous exercise even for advanced exercisers. Stand with the back of a chair within easy reach initially. Extend the right leg out first and squat down to your heel with your left. Once you have reached the end of the squat try not to touch extended leg as there comes the difficult part - getting up to standing position without touching the floor with your hands for support. Raise yourself to standing position and repeat with other leg. You can do about 3-4 sets with the same leg or alternate legs using the back of a chair for hand support as you squat deeply. The single legged squat exercises the gluteus, the knees and the entire hip joint and also gives lower back strength. Initially your knees might hurt so don't try this without support of a chair or a partner. Stop in case of intense pain. Step Training If plain jogging doesn't do the trick for shapely legs for you, try using stadium stairs or any gradient which is at 30 degrees and comprises even steps. Your regular apartment stairwell or even a pedestrian over bridge can do the trick. First set only walk up one step at a time. Second set do alternate stairs. For the third set you can sprint up as fast as you can the entire flight of stairs or halt for exactly ten seconds when tired and start again. You have the option of stopping as many times you wish as long as you start again after ten seconds. This can work up quite a sweat and regular step training works out and touches muscle groups that even normal running or squats cannot reach.
LBW - Babies that don't throw too much weight around!You'll hear this term if your baby weighs less than 2.5 kg (5.5 lb) when born. About six in 100 babies who are born in the UK have a low birth weight. There are a number of reasons for LBW in babies, with premature birth topping the list as far as reasons go. Babies born prematurely could have extremely low birth weight as compared to babies that are born between the natural term of pregnancy, i.e., between 36-40 weeks. So what are the other reasons behind LBW babies? Descent is an important factor that could also determine birth weight. A survey conducted in the UK showed that children born to people from the Indian sub-continent (Indian, Pakistani, or Bangladeshi) or African parents are more likely to be born with LBW as compared to babies born of white Caucasians. In case of twins or triplets, there are chances that one or all offspring might have LBW due to lack of space in the womb. The mother's health would largely determine the healthy weight of the child as well. Emotional problems faced by the mother during pregnancy could have a link with LBW. Same goes for addictions like smoking, alcohol abuse, designer drugs, and at times, health conditions like high blood pressure which cuts off healthy blood supply to the fetus. Even damage to the placenta can cause LBW, as the fetus does not receive vital nutrients, blood, and oxygen which can cause stunted growth or low weight at birth. Any congenital or hereditary conditions can also affect the baby's weight. There is much uncertainty with regard to the future of a baby with low birth weight. There have been instances where LBW babies have developed conditions like obesity, diabetes, or heart disease in later years. It is a common fear that LBW babies develop behavioral or emotional problems in schooling years and they are likely to have low intelligence. Of course, there isn't any concrete evidence. The pivotal factors here would be to find the cause for LBW and what trimester of pregnancy was it detected. Providing a stable family environment and taking special care of a LBW baby can also go a long way in keeping it healthy in subsequent years. Not to forget that the parents' size and genetic predisposition would have a lot to do with the baby's health and even weight. If the parents are small in size or underweight, then the chances are that the baby will be born small or with LBW. Breastfeeding the baby is the best strategy that a mother can adopt to ensure that the baby grows up well. While growing up, the parents will have to ensure that the baby receives a balanced nutritious diet to ensure healthy weight.
Your bundle of joy comes with bundles of fascinating facts Blue-eyed wonder: Most babies are born blue-eyed. The melanin pigment that decides the color of the eyes is not developed at the time of birth. So the babies are born with blue/light eyes irrespective of the genetic makeup. By the time the baby is 6-7 months old, the pigments start developing and the baby's eye colour changes as per the genetic makeup of the parents. Marked for life: One in every three infant is born with a birthmark! No tears: That is true! New born babies do not shed any tears. The lacrimal duct and the tear glands are well developed but they produce just enough tears for lubrication. Actual tears start appearing after one month of age. Crawling wonders: New research has found that babies can crawl almost as soon as they are born. When left to themselves, they are quite capable of using their limbs and find their way to food i.e. the mother's breast.And we thought that they are tiny helpless creatures! Temperature sensitivity: Babies are much more sensitive to temperature changes and body heat.Though the baby can't throw off the clothes to cool down, it is smart enough to do other things. When the baby is cold, it will move around more and if it is too hot it may just lie still as if sunbathing. Touch therapy: Touch is the most highly developed sensation in babies, even in premature ones. The touch sensation develops from head to toe with the mouth being the most sensitive. No wonder they tend to put everything in their mouths. Short-sighted: Babies are short sighted at birth. Their vision is set to a limit of 8-to-12 inches. They can see people and objects clearly only if they are within this range. Brain size: The brain grows at such a rate in newborns that by the end of the first year,the brain is double the birth size and half its final size! Palmar Grasp: New born babies have a strong grip, as strong as a monkey's. The grip is so strong that if you dangle them on one hand, they can support their own weight. This probably originated from the primitive survival instinct. This strong grasp reduces after a couple of months. Taste buds: Babies have more than 10,000 taste buds situated all over the tongue and even at the roof and sides. As they grow, these extra taste buds disappear.
Not very chummy! Menophobia - The fear of periodsMenstruation or periods begin as female reaches puberty. This is the time when there are hormonal changes which occur in the body as nature takes the girl and makes her ready for womanhood. The onset of periods can be distressful with lots of mood swings accompanied by abdominal cramps, bloated feet as the menstrual blood flows. This is also a time when the girl needs to be comforted and educated the most, as it can be truly a terrifying experience. Normally mothers or elder women in the family ensure that they take complete care of the girl in this transition phase. For some women, their initial experience with periods may not have been particularly pleasant, causing them to actually dread those 4 days and this fear can then take the shape of a full blown phobia -Menophobia! The reason could vary. For some the pain factor could be the reason for menophobia, while for others, it could be the memory of embarrassing red stains on the clothes which could set it off. In menophobia, just before the onset of the periods, the person starts getting anticipatory anxiety and the pain which could be normal period pain, is then imagined to be ten times worse. This brings on panic attacks and feeling of utter dread which while is entirely psychological can be utterly distressful and downright crippling. Counseling can help greatly along with pain medication to manage the pain and the fear of this natural phenomenon called periods. In therapy, this is what is iterated. That menstruation is a completely natural process and if there is a fear of menstrual blood then gradually, the woman is encouraged to accept it as a natural body function which plays a major part of her being a woman.
Beating the weight loss plateauThere comes a stage when you stop losing any weight in spite of strict exercise and diet regimen. This is called as weight loss plateau. When calorie intake is reduced along with exercise, the energy required is obtained from stored fat which eventually leads to weight loss. This rate of weight loss slows down and eventually stops once body reaches its set point of metabolism. This set point varies from person to person. So what can you do next? Here are some easy ways to get the weighing scale budging: Modify diet pattern: Metabolism slows down with lowering calorie intake. To reset metabolism, you need to have an adequate amount of calories. This can be done by including fruits and vegetables, whole grains, and proteins in diet. More energy is needed to burn proteins than carbohydrates or fats. Eat within half an hour or hour after exercising. Add proteins and carbohydrates to diet. Sip water: Increase total water intake in a day. Drink water before, during and after exercise and throughout the day. Change the workout: Change the exercises you do daily. Muscles get accustomed to a routine workout. Switching exercises and continually challenging helps burn more fat and build lean tissue. Change the type and time or duration of exercise. Try cycling instead of running if you have been doing it for long. Running, swimming, dancing, and Pilates too are good options. Skipping and brisk walking help in burning calories too and break the plateau. In the gym, change the exercise or number of repetitions. If you have been working on machines for long, try weight training or floor exercises. Take rest: Adequate rest is essential for the body to rejuvenate. Muscles, tendons, and ligaments get slight internal and external injuries which can be healed by rest. Proper rest helps repair and regenerate the tissue and makes them strong. Make these changes and get the needle on that weighing scale to budge.
5 Muscle building smoothiesProtein is highly important for muscle building as it repairs the muscles and help in their rapid recovery after a workout. That is why most of the trainers recommend taking protein smoothies after workouts. Generally, banana and peanut butter alternatively, are used to add the protein content to the smoothies. Apart from these, Chocolate is a hot favourite as well. But if these do get boring, here are some smoothie ideas, only for you. Hot Cocoa (bed-time and post workout) Ingredients: 1-cup milk (fat-free), 1 scoop whey protein chocolate, 1 packet Swiss Miss Diet hot Cocoa and ½-cup cottage cheese (low fat). Recipe Heat the milk and just when it gets to the boiling point, blend it in the blender with the protein, cottage cheese and cocoa until smooth. Ensure that the mixture has mixed well. This protein smoothie can be taken just before bedtime as well, because the cottage cheese contains slow digesting proteins that are great for overnight muscle repairing. Each glass of the Hot Cocoa smoothie contains: Calories-275 Protein-44 gms Carbs-20 gms Fat-1 gm Fiber-0gm Root Beer Float (post-workout) Ingredients: 1 scoop vanilla flavored whey protein, ½ cup vanilla yoghurt (fat free(, 1 scoop vanilla casein protein and 1 ½ cup root beer Recipe In a bowl mix all the protein powders into the yogurt slowly and stir well to avoid clumps. Now, pour the root beer in a large beer glass and add this mixture of yoghurt carefully, without stirring. Since the root beer starts carbonation process, the shake becomes quite frothy without having to use a blender for mixing. Each large glass of the Root Beer Float smoothie contains: Calories-443 Protein-48gms Carbs-61 gms Fat-1 gm Fiber-1 gm Post workout or pre-workout smoothies provide the necessary protein to the body that contributes in rapid muscle recovery and growth. Peach Cobbler (pre-workout) Ingredients: 1-cup water, ½ can of sliced peaches with juice, 1 scoop vanilla whey and 1 packet Quakers Instant Oatmeal (lower sugar maple and brown sugar) Recipe Mix all the ingredients in a blender and serve. Use an immersion blender for this one, to get a finely mixed smoothie. Each glass of the Peach Cobbler smoothie contains: Calories-305 Protein-24 gms Carbs-49 gms Fat- 2 gms Fiber-3 gms Orange Creamsicle (pre-workout) Ingredients: 1-cup orange juice, ½ cup fat-free yoghurt (vanilla flavor) and 1 scoop vanilla whey protein Recipe Mix all the ingredients in the blender and enjoy your smoothie. Ensure that you use real orange juice and not the flavored orange drinks for this one to get the desired result. One glass of the Orange Creamsicle smoothie contains: Calories-280 Protein-27gms Carbs-43 gms Fat-1 gm Fiber-2 gms Chocolate Almond Brownie (pre workout or early morning) Ingredients: 1 cup milk (fat-free), ¼ cup almonds (chopped), ½ Clif brownie bar (chocolate flavor-chopped finely) and 1 scoop of chocolate flavored whey protein Recipe Mix the milk and the flavored protein in the blender and serve with almonds and Clif bar topping. Use a spoon as you will be eating as well as drinking the shake, because the almonds and the bar chips can settle to the bottom. One glass of this Chocolate Almond Brownie smoothie contains: Calories -457 Protein-39 gms Carbs-41 gms Fat-17 gms Fiber-8 gms
Stinky feet? Learn why!Most of us have experienced a bad smelly foot at least once in our lives. We all have that one friend or relative who has such smelly feet that he can clear off a room as soon as he kicks off his shoes! With more than 250,000 sweat glands in each foot, the feet are the most highly sweating parts of the body. What causes this bad smell? The feet contain thousands of sweat glands. During warm days or when you wear socks and tight shoes, the sweating increases in due proportion. The resulting sweat does not find an outlet and starts accumulating in the spaces available and this warm and moist area breeds bacteria. The bacteria start feasting on your sweat and dead skin. They digest their food and release the waste products. These waste products are toxic organic acids that cause the feet to smell so bad. About 10 to 15% of people suffer from this horribly bad smell. Why? This is because their feet are extra sweaty and become a home ground for certain bacteria called as Micrococcus sedantarius. Along with stinky organic acids, the bacteria produce volatile sulphur compounds. Sulphur compounds are powerful and extremely awful smelling almost like a dirty rotten egg. Teenage years also see extra amounts of sweating on the feet. Medical conditions like Hyperhidrosis can also make your feet sweat more. If you are suffering from a fungal infection of the foot, then rest assured that your feet will smell horrible. Smelly feet can be an embarrassing problem. It puts everyone in a spot. Hence, foot hygiene is important to avoid smelly feet. Always wash and dry your feet well every morning. Dab some antiperspirant powder on your feet and between the toes to soak the perspiration. Never wear the same shoes for more than 2 days in a row. Wear a fresh pair of socks daily. Keep your feet exposed to fresh air. Avoid tight-fitting shoes. Use an antibacterial soap to wash your feet if you have smelly feet. Visit your doctor if simple home measures do not prove very effective. Excessive sweating is often considered the cause for foot odor. This is not true. Sweating in itself is harmless; it is the bacteria that grow there that are responsible for the awful odor.
Winter - When your heart feels the cold too!As per a study in America, 193.6 people of every 10000 people die of a heart disease every year. 53% of the heart attacks occur in the winter months. Heart diseases have a seasonal trend as found by medical research recently. A team of medical researchers recently conducted a survey which saw 10,000 participants between the ages 35 to 80 from around seven European countries. The study was conducted to see if there is any seasonal variation in the presentation of heart diseases. The participants were measured on the parameters of blood pressure, waist circumference, body mass index, blood glucose levels and blood lipid levels. The parameters were later adjusted for sex, age and smoking. The results revealed that the incidence of heart disease shows an upward trend in the winter month [Jan to Feb] as compared to the summer months [June-Aug]. The researchers accept that there is no logical explanation to these findings. A plausible cause being the fact that the eating habits change in winter. One tends to eat more which in turn increases the cholesterol levels leading to heart diseases. Several other theories are being put forth. According to one, during the winter months the body undergoes hormonal imbalance. The day and night variation in the hormone levels, especially that of cortisol varies. This results in a lower threshold for heart attacks. Yet another theory says that the cold temperature tends to constrict the arteries narrowing the blood flow to the heart tissue and this result in a heart attack. On the basis of this study, scientists advise that more attention is to be paid to heart health during the winters.
Reasons for skipping sexThe most important satisfaction brick in a marriage's foundation, sex is where we show the greatest trust, most openly express intimacy and make ourselves most vulnerable. It is the most personal and private area of our relationship. It is the one area that separates this relationship from all others. Yet, there are times for both husbands and wives when sex becomes a burden and not a blessing, an inconvenience instead of intimacy, and a job instead of jubilee. Curious as to why people might be skipping sex? This is only a partial list and far from exhaustive. Reasons related to your body: I have a migraine. I have a stomachache. My body is too tired. My breasts are too sore. I am too sleepy. I can't keep my eyes open. I just need to take a little nap first. Okay, but I have a rash. Okay, but I have several weird looking cold sores. Reasons related to your emotions: I am depressed. I am worried. I am sad. Cry Reasons related to your kids: The kids are still up. We might wake up the kids. I just had a baby. This baby is wearing me out. Reasons related to your experts: My therapist said I need to give myself some time. My counselor said I should create some boundaries. I have to see my Gynecologist tomorrow. The Doctor gave me these sleeping pills for stress and I just took one. Reasons related to your spouse: Who was that girl / guy you were talking to on the phone? Sex, Sex, Sex All you ever want is sex! Why can't you just hold me? You should have asked in a more romantic way! Why do you have to use such crude language? Reasons related to your weather: It's just too hot. It's just too cold. It's too humid. Reasons related to your economy: When the economy improves. When the interest rates go down. When inflation goes down Reasons related to your special circumstances: We just got back from vacation! When I lose 20 kgs. Reasons related to your friends: I need to make a call first. My friend said they only do it once a month. Reasons related to your pets: The dog can see us. The cat is on the bed. Reasons related to your finances: Okay, but first we need to talk about the bills. Why did you charge this hotel room on our credit card? Reasons related to your job or boss: I have to get up early tomorrow. I was up all night last night. I had a long day at work today. The boss just gave me a new project and I have a lot of work to do Reasons related to your religion: Doesn't the Bible warn against having too much sex. I am sorry, but I just took a vow. I am giving up sex for Lent. Reasons related to your in-laws: We are in your parent's house. I have not been able to concentrate since your mother Your parents will hear us. Offer an alternative: Can I just take care of you in the shower? Okay, but you have to drive the kids to school in the morning. Use evasive tactics: Sneak in and go to sleep early. Okay, but let's watch this movie first. It's just too late. I'll be there in a minute. (Take an hour) Can we just cuddle? I just need you to hold me. Ask a sensitive question: Did you go to the bank and make our deposit today? Have you seen the kid's report cards? Wait for your spouse to tease you and then say coldly, well, you just lost whatever you were going to get tonight.
Is sex linked to self esteem?Man is a curious creature, full of quirks and contradictions. Sexual intercourse, something that most people consider an intimate and private experience, is spoken about in hushed tones and often, with some discomfort. We don't reveal or talk about our sexual desires, as readily we discuss our salary packages or food habits. This is quite ironic seeing how sex is an important gauge for a person's self esteem and also an indicator of his/her social desirability. The very thing that we do under covers, we somehow choose to "keep under cover". The Link between Sex and Self Esteem: Self esteem is an important factor that determines the mental & physical well-being of an individual. All of us have a craving to be understood, liked and appreciated; and these form the equivalent of our basic needs on the inverted pyramid- Food, clothing and shelter. For a human being to flourish and prosper, consumable food, without the mental food of appreciation, is not enough; and sexual intercourse or an intimacy with the opposite sex, is one way of validating that need. Sex therefore, ceases to be just a physical need instilled by nature for the perpetuation of the species, but goes into the larger emotional cum psychological dimension of self actualization and realization. Though some of us might be embarrassed to broach the topic of 'whether or not we are getting enough', the truth is that every human seeks to achieve his sexual potential, even while he or she might, not be aware of it. Most of us have the ability to get the foods matching our taste preferences onto our plates, but with sex, this could be a little difficult, since sex, is a complex subject with a lot of social, moral and religious links. The truth is evident in the number of marriages (the very cornerstones of civil society) that fail on the basis of sexual compatibility, either by setting unrealistic sexual expectations or by not owning up to, or even identifying, one's sexual needs. This has repercussions on the psyche and self-esteem of a person, and this is especially true in the case of men in particular, as they may feel completely inferior for not being able to attract a sexual partner matching his desires. In some people, this also leads to a case of self-loathing, for having sexual needs which a partner doesn't understand, or much worse, needs which are considered taboo and sinful (Homosexuality, Anal Sex, Group Sex, Fetishes, etc.) These complex emotions can wreak  havoc on a person's self-esteem, by creating severe internal conflicts and serious self-doubts. Now socially, sex can either liberate a person, or hold him prisoner. At times, the unfulfilled needs may get repressed and banished to the shadows, only to be played out later, in the form of sexual adventurism and crime. Just one look at the sexual crimes in our society today, and we can clearly understand just how healthy our collective self esteem is! The very society that frowns upon prostitution, is actually responsible for creating it, though everybody would like to pretend otherwise. The crux of the matter is that "sex" and "self esteem" are closely related; and one should not shy away from addressing any issues one might face regarding one's sexuality. Physical love is necessary for the survival of a relationship and one needs to make time and efforts to successfully create one's own sexual space. The positive effects of a good sex life can be seen in an increased work productivity, fewer illnesses and an increase in one's overall efficiency. Some people are haunted by sexual guilt and confusion and when they keep it all locked up, they suffer from unexplained physical pains and feel 'down in the dumps' mentally. Another problem with appreciation from the opposite sex, is the addiction to  external validation. Some people feel utterly worthless until they receive positive feedback about their looks or abilities on a regular basis. This can be downright devastating, as in these cases, there is a great dependence on external factors for one to feel good. While no one denies the "feel good factor" of sexual appreciation, it is up to each one of us, to decide just how much of control one must be giving to external factors, to determine our personal self-esteem. The appreciation may be theirs, but the esteem is entirely of the self and only the self can decide how much of appreciation and sex is enough.
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