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  MEN`S HEALTH MORE
9 ways to become a better dad
Can a man be depressed?
Too much of these can be detrimental to healthModeration is the mantra for everything in life. There are a lot of things in our daily life that we do. Excess of these can be detrimental for your health. Let's see how: Television, Laptop, Mobile: That screen is torture for your eyes. Looking at the TV/ laptop/ mobile screen for too long can cause dryness of the eyes. It also makes the mind dull and inactive. Even though you have not done anything much, you feel tired. It is also unhealthy for your social and personal life. Gadgets are meant to add convenience to your life, and not alienate you from real people. These also lead to sedentary lifestyle which further triggers obesity, hypertension, diabetes and other chronic ailments. Travelling: Many of us travel for work, for education. Frequent meetings are a part of work life. Some like to holiday a lot. But too much traveling upsets routine for the body. It changes schedules too often, adds new stressors to an ordinary day. Food options also get limited and sleeping patterns are influenced. If your job demands excessive travel, make sure you consciously put an effort to choose a healthy lifestyle when away from home. Worrying: Worry is unavoidable. Think of a day you did not worry about anything, isn't it difficult? Normal stress is a part of life, but if you are worrying too much, you are weakening your immune system in more ways than one. It makes you weak, susceptible to infections, prone to lifestyle diseases, and also affects your social life and relationships. Vitamin supplements: Supplements are not your daily diet. Have them in moderation and with due consultation from a doctor. Some vitamins get stored in the body when taken in excess quantities. This can result in condition called as hypervitaminosis and various health problems. Exercise: Body is not a mechanical machine that can keep functioning at the click of a switch. Even a machine needs oiling and repairs. If you love to exercise, that's great. But don't do it all day. Too much physical exercise is strain on the body. It can lead to muscle exhaustion, weakness, breakdown and may even damage the kidneys. Sleeping: Sleeping is the rest the body needs but too much of rest means rusting. Oversleeping makes you dull and may even trigger your migraines. It annoys the body clock and may create metabolic disturbances Social Networking: This is not good for your mental health. Those two hundred friends who like and comment are not your world; the one whom you call when you want to cry is your friend. Posting images and sharing updates on social media is fine, but it is more important to talk to those who live with you, who are physically around. Many peer pressures and image issues also arise from excessive social networking and people may tend to live in a 'make believe' world.
Strict parenting: When enough is enoughThe strict or authoritative style of parenting is where the parents hold their children's lives over a tight leash. Strict parents are high in control and low in nurturing qualities. They set high standards for all activities and expect strict obedience to the rules set by them. However, these parents display little or no warmth and affection. They love and affection they offer is also conditional love based on obedience and performance. Children of authoritarian parents turn out to be obedient, but this obedience is based on fear. Such parents very often use shame and guilt to make their children change their behaviour. They don't encourage verbal give-and-take and expect their orders to be obeyed without question. The children brought up in such a way are initially very obedient and polite but later all the suppressed emotions find an outlet. More often than not, such children end up being aggressive and tend to be bullies at school. Research shows that fathers who are extremely strict with their sons end up making their sons violent and aggressive, or indulge in non-physical aggressiveness like name calling. Strictly raised children have difficulty relating to their peer group. They either end up being aggressive or completely timid and submissive. At school teachers rate them as less socially competent, average or poor at studies and extra-curricular activities. They are also less accepted by their friends. The school dropout rates in such children are very high. Studies conducted on such dropouts revealed that they suffered from a huge inferiority complex and low self-esteem. Strict parenting can cause several problems in adolescence too. Children who are dominated by their parents are often found breaking the law. Alcohol and drug abuse rates are high in such children. Psychologically, these children are usually poor decision makers. Having had their parents make decisions for them all their lives, they find it very difficult to take a stand. They end up being indecisive. At the workplace too, they lack the competency to take up initiatives or show the lead. They make better team members than team leaders. Even if presented with an opportunity, they are likely to shy away from responsibility as they feel inferior and lack the requisite courage. Strict parenting can have a negative impact on the child's weight too. Studies show that an overly strict upbringing has a negative impact on weight because the children often fail to learn to eat on the basis of hunger and satiety. In such families parents use food as a reward, insist that children clean their plates, or restrict the kind or amount of food a child can eat. The studies showed that the children of authoritarian mothers were nearly five times as likely to be overweight compared to their counterparts!
  WOMEN`S HEALTH MORE
10 Early signs of pregnancy
5 health hazards in women
Importance of breastfeedingBreastfeeding is a natural act and that is why it is also one of the most beneficial acts for a baby. Breastfeeding provides essential nourishment and is the best food for the baby's stomach to digest. No matter how many infant formulas enriched with vitamins and minerals you provide to your baby, it can never replicate mother's milk. As for the mother, there is nothing more joyous than providing your baby with the best start that it can get in the long journey of life. The bond that the mother and the baby share through breastfeeding is one of the most special bonds. For the first six months, breastfeeding your baby is recommended for all mothers whether they are working or at home. Most working mothers are given leave, whether paid or unpaid, so they must ensure they provide their babies with regular breast milk. Breast milk protects the child against diarrhea, respiratory infections, pneumonia, ear infections, and helps to reduce chronic constipation and colic that the babies are prone to. Research also points to the fact that breastfed babies are immunized and protected against allergies, asthma, sudden death, diabetes, and obesity. They remain much healthier than those babies who are formula fed. In India, only 41% mothers begin early breastfeeding even though it has so many benefits. Mothers who exclusively breastfeed their babies help them to survive better. They also gift them with better brain development and these babies are likely to perform well intellectually. No matter which economic section of society the mother comes from, she can provide her baby with the best start in life by breastfeeding it and make sure that the child develops to its full potential. Breastfeeding is natural, simple, and cost-effective way to ensure your baby is healthy and continues to develop healthily. Since the breastfeeding campaign began on a large scale, child mortality has decreased. Immediate breastfeeding within one hour of birth has helped to significantly reduce sudden baby deaths. The colostrum, the first thick yellow breast milk is what protects babies from many diseases as it is filled with goodness. Lack of nutrition or malnutrition is another aspect that leads to infant deaths. Breastfeeding can significantly lower infant deaths from malnutrition as the mother's milk is one of the most nutritious foods provided by nature for the baby's healthy growth. A mother has the full ability to provide adequate nutrition for the baby, therefore breastfeeding needs to be encouraged fully. Employers need to create an appropriate space within their premises and should encourage new mothers to breastfeed their child. Breastfeeding also has a number of benefits for the mother. It helps to burn calories and the mother can return to her former pre-pregnancy state. Breastfeeding helps mothers to reduce their risk of breast, uterine, and ovarian cancer;high blood pressure;diabetes; and heart diseases. So for the first six months, mothers must make sure to breastfeed their baby and do not substitute it with baby food products.
Marrying late in lifeConventionally, the marriage age is determined according to the linear formula of happiness that we have constructed and believe to be true. The formula being: getting married by 24 --> having children by 27 --> working (optional) --> becoming a grandparent (that too, real soon!). However, time and again, men and women wandering in their 40s-50s have woken up from the deep disturbed slumber to realize that maybe- just maybe, they had walked into things too fast. They had been unable to know who they are and to become a self-conscious human being before being ready to fuse their lives with another. The prime point of being single and marrying later in life is not to go on some form of egoistic joy-trip but to be able to know oneself and become ready to be the right person for the other. By marrying late, you give yourself time to experience freely what you like and dislike. You get to explore the world at your own terms- travel whenever you want and involve yourself in festivals and activities that manifest who you are. Marrying early doesn't allow for time to explore one's being, as marriage generally immediately follows the time you finish your studies or begin working. One of the most important aspects of adulthood today is travelling. However, every individual has unique wants of travelling and being a single adult will allow you to experience the world fully. You will also get in touch with yourself, exploring how you would like to live. The decision will arise from a ground of experiences which would clearly tell you what repels and what appeals to you. Such experiences are rarely findable once you begin living with another, as you would have to schedule your days and basically, your routine around the other's life as well. Financially, you have reached a point where you know how to take care and manage finances, allowing you to plan your wedding pragmatically. Marrying at a later point in your life allows you to be clear about when you would like to be a parent. Your experiences also ready you to be a considerate and understanding parent who can guide a child. As you grow older, you tend to become more tolerant and the propensity towards differences turning into unnecessary fights is lowered. As our ways of looking at the world change, every person as an individual has the need to learn to see the world as a home. This feeling of being at home is created only through series of experiences one has to go through as a responsible adult. In the face of inexperience, two individuals coming together often find themselves incapable of being happy with one another. Marrying later allows you to have grown into a wiser person yourself before sharing your life with another.
  KIDS CARE MORE
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10 tricks to motivate kids
Is circumcision a healthy ritual?Religious rituals and practices have been carried out since ancient times. Circumcision is a religious ritual that involves surgical removal of the prepuce of the human penis. Prepuce is the foreskin of the penis and during the procedure; the person performing the ritual opens, inspects and separates it from the glans. The process is painful and hence local or topical anesthesia is used to reduce physiological stress and pain. Circumcision is performed for religious as well as personal reasons and many times recommended medically for prophylactic or therapeutic reasons as well. Today's medical science makes use of this treatment for treating chronic urinary tract infections, refractory balanoposthitis and pathological phimosis. Circumcision is performed as ritual in many parts of the world. However, it is also recommended medically as protection against HIV infection. Circumcision-Is it Legal and Ethical? In the world over, the ritual or practice of circumcision is carried out on all types of people from neonatal stage to adulthood. While no significant risks have been noticed due to the practice of this ritual, rather some modest health benefits have come to the fore. The World Health Organization has recommended circumcision for male infants in parts of Africa where the children are more vulnerable to urinary tract infections. However, no other medical organization in the world has supported or banned the procedure. Over past few years, legal and ethical questions have been making rounds and many believe that consent should be taken before carrying out neonatal circumcision. HIV and Circumcision Benefits A Cochrane meta-analysis conducted in 2009 on sexually active African men have revealed that the ritual of circumcision reduces the risk rate of HIV infection by 38 to 66 percent among heterosexual men in a period of 24 months. That is why WHO has recommended circumcision in sub-Saharan African areas having high rates of HIV infection as a part of the comprehensive HIV program. Moreover, this process is more cost-effective as compared to other treatments and preventive measures recommended for HIV. Circumcision reduces the risk rate of HSV-2 infections and oncogenic HPV prevalence along with the risk of penile cancer and UTIs. Until now, there have been no concluding reports on the protective effects circumcision offers against other types of sexually transmitted infections. Circumcision is also recommended medically to children suffering from pathological phimosis and refractory balanoposthitis. Contraindications The literature worldwide review conducted in 2010 reveals that around 1.5 percent of the newborns face median complication when the process of circumcision is performed by trained medical providers. Only 6 percent children face severe complications with the common complications being infection, bleeding or removal of too little or too much of foreskin. However, the process does not cause any negative impact on the sexual functioning of an individual. Contraindications due to circumcision are also cited in infants having genital structure abnormalities right from the birth such as misplaced urethral opening, ambiguous genitalia or chordae. In such cases, the foreskin may require reconstruction through surgery.  It is contraindicated in premature babies and clinically unstable infants and it should also be avoided in children with family history of hemophilia (bleeding disorders). In such patients, it is important that the blood should be checked for its coagulation properties before attempting the procedure.
Bedwetting in children: Causes and treatmentBed wetting or nocturnal enuresis is very common in childhood. Bladder control is achieved in children by the age of 4 years. Night-time bladder control takes longer in some children and is achieved between 5 to7 years of age. Delayed bladder maturation in some kids, history of nocturnal enuresis in children, hormonal problems (reduced vasopressin), deep sleep and emotional problems in kids are some of the problems. Constipation and irregular bowel movements can also be the cause in some kids and it should be reported to the physician immediately. Bed wetting should be dealt with using motivational therapy, bladder training, fluid management, behavioural alarms and sometimes medications. Child's willingnessand ability to participate in the treatment and counselling is important. Motivating kid and parents in important. Treatment can be lengthy. Here are a few simple tips to get rid of bedwetting: Cut down a kid's water intake or other liquids few hours before going to bed. Inculcate habit of going to the loo to pee before he/she goes to sleep. Wake the child up from sleep once during night-time, if required, to empty bladder. Ensure to keep the child warm. Use warm clothing. Cold temperature increases urge and frequency of urination. Try using diapers to reduce the kid's embarrassment.
  MENTAL HEALTH MORE
Tips for a good sleep
Delusional disorder
Sweetie, I am addicted to you!Research shows sugar can be more addictive than heroin. What was the last thing you ate or drank before reading this? Bread? Banana? Chocolate? Cake? Fries? Wafers? Doughnut? Biscuits? Soda? Juice? Wine? Vodka? Coffee? Tea? They are all sugars ultimately. Some taste sweet, some don't. The first thing we taste as babies is milk. It is naturally sweet. From that young age, we learn that sugar is what we like and what we want. You may be a sugar addict, if: You need 'something sweet' after every meal. You cannot have tea or coffee without that second pinch of sugar. Dessert is a must every time you eat out. You go hunting to the refrigerator looking for cake leftovers. A little bite of that chocolate bar is all you need to be happy. You are the one who finishes off the last piece of laddu in the house. You want ketchup with everything - fries, noodles, pizza, burger, samosa, kachori. You want all the above listed items because you just read their names. When out in the hot sun, water is not sufficient for you, you want flavored sweetened chilled drinks. A mocktail or a soda drink makes your dinner complete. And many more such things. So, you see, almost all of us are sugar addicts. Studies show every person in countries like, USA, UK and Australia, may be a sugar addict. The reasons behind the sugar addiction are manifold. First, beyond doubt sugar tastes awesome. Taste factor cannot be debated with. But do you know, the taste is conditioned? Cravings are not always and entirely natural. They are a result of what you give the body and teach your taste buds. Second, businesses heavily exploit this weakness for sugar. Wherever you go there is unimaginable variety of sugar products. A café, a restaurant, a general store, a superstore, a street cart - they all have several options for you to indulge in. How much can one resist and how much can on filter the menu! Third, sugar creates instant gratification. That does work for it and that does add to our trouble. A sad day at work and some chocolate perks you up. Feeling dull and bored, let's go out for an ice cream. This happens too often. Why sugar isn't that sweet? We feel what harm can little sweet do, being happy is more important. However, sugar is worse than many other food vices. As an experiment, check the contents of everything in your kitchen and count how many of them have sugar, in any amounts. Try skipping everything that has sugar in it for the next three days. You will be shocked. The options to eat cut down to several degrees if you skip sugar. The problem with sugar is it makes you want more. A bit does not satisfy you. Sugar increases the desire for sugar - immediate and long term, likewise. The moment you have a bite of something sweet, you cannot stop there, you need to eat another bite, and another, and another. In the long run, your taste buds are getting deeply conditioned for sugar cravings. Your body learns that every time the mind is feeling low, it should ask for sugar. That is how it has been taught to feel better. You are entering a vicious cycle when you entertain these cravings. Sugar is often defamed as a white poison. It is not an exaggeration. Sugar has no nutritive value, apart from generating energy in the body. It simply increases the risk of numerous health complications. Sugar is a known culprit for diabetes mellitus, obesity, heart disease, hormonal imbalance, sexual dysfunctions, and others. Sugar addiction is the most common addiction of all. It is difficult to leave sugar completely out, but one can always cut the portions. How to beat that addiction? Time for some action? All this information must be making you want to cut down on your sugar intake. Hold on. Alcohol, smoking, drugs - they are understood and accepted as addictions. So, there are support groups, people around us will motivate and help us to de-addict. Getting rid of our sugar addiction is even tougher. It will require tremendous amount of will power and determination. Are you ready for the challenge? Let us see some simple ways to de-addict from sugars: Drink less Cut down on all the artificially sweetened drinks - colas, orange, iced teas, flavored canned drinks, sodas. They have zero health benefit. The only reason why you have them is because of the taste factor. Remember the taste is momentary. Once inside the body, these drinks are creating havoc for your system. One spoon less - Tea or coffee? What do you need to start your day? Whatever it is, try reducing the sugar portions. If you take two spoons, try one. If you take one spoon, try half. It will be difficult in the beginning but eventually you will get used to it and you will even like it. Have whole fruits instead of juices. Anything drinkable in the cans contains sugar. Say no to cans. Eat less Give the ketchup bottles some rest. Decide your weekly chocolate quota. Don't let the moods overpower your decision. Bakery items are loaded with sugar, forget they exist. Turn a blind eye to that shelf when you go grocery shopping. A fan of breakfast cereal? Check the packets for sugar content. The ones that are flavoured have more sugar. Pick the plain ones. You can add your own choice of fruit and dry fruits for nutrition. Desserts should be a onetime thing, only when the occasion calls for it. You don't need them daily. Let the sweetness be in your words, not on your plate.
Not very chummy! Menophobia - The fear of periodsMenstruation or periods begin as female reaches puberty. This is the time when there are hormonal changes which occur in the body as nature takes the girl and makes her ready for womanhood. The onset of periods can be distressful with lots of mood swings accompanied by abdominal cramps, bloated feet as the menstrual blood flows. This is also a time when the girl needs to be comforted and educated the most, as it can be truly a terrifying experience. Normally mothers or elder women in the family ensure that they take complete care of the girl in this transition phase. For some women, their initial experience with periods may not have been particularly pleasant, causing them to actually dread those 4 days and this fear can then take the shape of a full blown phobia -Menophobia! The reason could vary. For some the pain factor could be the reason for menophobia, while for others, it could be the memory of embarrassing red stains on the clothes which could set it off. In menophobia, just before the onset of the periods, the person starts getting anticipatory anxiety and the pain which could be normal period pain, is then imagined to be ten times worse. This brings on panic attacks and feeling of utter dread which while is entirely psychological can be utterly distressful and downright crippling. Counseling can help greatly along with pain medication to manage the pain and the fear of this natural phenomenon called periods. In therapy, this is what is iterated. That menstruation is a completely natural process and if there is a fear of menstrual blood then gradually, the woman is encouraged to accept it as a natural body function which plays a major part of her being a woman.
  BEAUTY AND FITNESS MORE
A yoga exercise every day keeps the troubles away
Complete acne care guide - Why, what, and how?
Have that chocolate without any guiltYou may find this hard to believe, but chocolate is actually good for your health. Hold on, before you faint. Let's first get to the crux of the matter. Chocolate can actually be good for you if you eat it in moderate quantities. So what about all the bad effects of chocolate that people always talk about? Let's fume them all one by one:  Chocolate causes dental caries: Dear mummy, dental caries (cavities) are caused due to poor oral hygiene and consumption of foods rich in fermentable carbohydrates. When these carbohydrates are left in the tooth for a long time, they release an acid. This may damage the tooth enamel and cause tooth decay. In fact, chocolate contains tannin which actually prevents cavities from forming. So next time, dear mommies, let your child enjoy a small piece of chocolate. You can also join them in the treat.  Chocolate is loaded with fats and sugar:Yes, chocolate comprises of both saturated and unsaturated fats, but a majority of themare in the form of oleic acid and stearic acid. Now, oleic acid (present in olives) and stearic acid are good to lower the blood cholesterol levels. Also, the fat that is found in chocolate is added later, after the chocolate has been processed. So the higher content of cocoa in any bar ensures that there is less fat in the chocolate. So, what about the sugar?Sugar is bad, but the darker variety of chocolate has less sugar compared to the regular sweet chocolate. Dark means higher cocoa content and hence no room for other fillers likes cocoa butter, sugar, nuts, etc.  Chocolate contains no nutrients: On the contrary, it is rich in antioxidants.What is the work of an antioxidant? They scavenge the body of free radicals, which roam in body and cause ageing and diseases. Antioxidant flushes these free radicals out of your body. So, if you want to stay young, bite on a piece of chocolate once a week. Secondly, diets rich in antioxidants have been proven to lower the incidences of heart attacks, strokes, cardiovascular diseases, hyperlipidemia, and arthritis. Hence, I stand by the bar full of antioxidants;it's actually good for you.  Chocolate contains caffeine: Caffeine content in chocolatesis low as compared to your tea, coffee, or cola drinks. Now, having counted the amazing health benefits of chocolate, it is important to tell you which chocolate is healthy for you. The one which is in its purest form - thebittersweet one, which is high in cocoa content, is the clue to your healthy bar. So next time you crave a dessert, indulge in a small piece of chocolate to satisfy your sweet tooth and forget that guilt.  
Benefits of meditation: How daily meditation helps you lead a wholesome life Sharper memory: One of the most important cognitive capacities we use daily is our memory. With higher amount of stress on your brain and body due to demands at workplace and home, there is high probability of negative effect on your memory. This can be countered by mindfulness meditation where the focus of attention is a particular physical sensation. This lets you quiet your mind and learn to be attentive solely to the matter at hand, thus allowing your brain to be able to remember more sharply and quickly. Dealing with stress: Stress is the buzzword for anyone who is leading their life in busy cities. Starting from the hurried walk into the office to the pressure of meeting deadlines and reaching home exhausted only to find oneself engrossed in another set of tedious jobs is the condition of daily life for most people. Meditation will allow you to cope with stress in a stronger way by bringing the energies of your body under your control, thus giving you the power to channelize them effectively. Giving up painkillers: Recent medical studies, especially ones conducted in Montreal in 2010, showed how the practice of Zen meditation structures the brain in such a manner that its capacity to sense and deal with pain increases. Primarily practiced by Buddhist monks, Zen is the form of meditation where you focus on your breathing and posture while watching and letting your mind gradually turn quiet. In this way, you can put those pain killers away and increase your innate capacity to deal with pain. Happiness quotient: Prefrontal cortex is the part of brain concerned with positive emotions and feelings. Those who meditate have been seen to have greater activity in this area. Major journals and research institutions focusing on depression and role of meditation in reducing it have found that meditation helps the person to feel in control of their life by subtly changing the working of their brains and thus, resulting in greater capacity to cope with depression and negative feelings. Good for your heart: Two kinds of meditation which are greatly beneficial for smooth working of your heart are Zen and Transcendental meditation. Transcendental meditation, taking after its name, helps you to transcend your worries through attention on chanting. It has been found that meditating daily helps to reduce the chances of stroke and heart attacks by over 40%.
  LIFESTYLE PROBLEMS MORE
All about cholesterol
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A primer on heart attacksIndians around the world have one of the highest rates of heart diseases. Heart attack, also called as myocardial infarction, is mainly caused by a blockage that prevents oxygen-rich blood supply to your heart muscle. In other words, it is the death of the heart muscle. What causes a heart attack? When cholesterol deposition, plaques of calcium and proteins on the walls of your coronary artery cause blockage of the artery, your heart fails to receive sufficient nutrient-rich blood. This leads to the permanent death of heart muscle, and it is unable to pump the blood to your vital organs. Symptoms that signal a heart attack   Chest pain is a symptom of a heart attack.  This pain can feel like tight ache, pressure on the heart as if an elephant is sitting across the chest. However, you may get confused with the symptom chest pain - whether it is a heart attack or an angina pain. Chest pain lasts for a longer time in heart attack whereas the chest pain in angina lasts for few seconds and goes away after rest. The pain experienced during a heart attack sometimes feels like indigestion or heart burn. Other warning signs of heart attack are: Shortness of breath. Lightheadedness or fainting. Upper body discomfort in arm, the back, neck, and jaw. Nausea, vomiting, dizziness. Sleep problems or fatigue. Not every person will have the same symptoms of the heart attack. But if you have any of these warning signs, you have to act fast and get the right treatment.
Don't turn away from stiff neckAny pain in the neck is really just that: a real pain in the neck! And it can be really scary. Persistent neck pains should not be ignored and shown to a doctor as soon as possible. If the doctor rules out any serious condition, then the pain invariably can be attributed to faulty posture and sitting habits. Some of the common postures that lead to neck pain are: If the head is held forward of shoulders, it causes undue strain on the vertebrae of the neck and this could easily turn into 'degenerative disc disease', if gone unchecked. Sitting in front of the computer for long hours causes the neck to crouch forward and can lead to soreness and chronic neck pain. What causes neck pain? Abnormalities in the bone or joints Trauma Poor posture Degenerative diseases Tumours Muscle strain Sometimes the cause of the neck pain could be something more serious like Cervical foraminal stenosis.  
  Sexual Health MORE
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Dealing with senior sex problems
Is sex linked to self esteem?Man is a curious creature, full of quirks and contradictions. Sexual intercourse, something that most people consider an intimate and private experience, is spoken about in hushed tones and often, with some discomfort. We don't reveal or talk about our sexual desires, as readily we discuss our salary packages or food habits. This is quite ironic seeing how sex is an important gauge for a person's self esteem and also an indicator of his/her social desirability. The very thing that we do under covers, we somehow choose to "keep under cover". The Link between Sex and Self Esteem: Self esteem is an important factor that determines the mental & physical well-being of an individual. All of us have a craving to be understood, liked and appreciated; and these form the equivalent of our basic needs on the inverted pyramid- Food, clothing and shelter. For a human being to flourish and prosper, consumable food, without the mental food of appreciation, is not enough; and sexual intercourse or an intimacy with the opposite sex, is one way of validating that need. Sex therefore, ceases to be just a physical need instilled by nature for the perpetuation of the species, but goes into the larger emotional cum psychological dimension of self actualization and realization. Though some of us might be embarrassed to broach the topic of 'whether or not we are getting enough', the truth is that every human seeks to achieve his sexual potential, even while he or she might, not be aware of it. Most of us have the ability to get the foods matching our taste preferences onto our plates, but with sex, this could be a little difficult, since sex, is a complex subject with a lot of social, moral and religious links. The truth is evident in the number of marriages (the very cornerstones of civil society) that fail on the basis of sexual compatibility, either by setting unrealistic sexual expectations or by not owning up to, or even identifying, one's sexual needs. This has repercussions on the psyche and self-esteem of a person, and this is especially true in the case of men in particular, as they may feel completely inferior for not being able to attract a sexual partner matching his desires. In some people, this also leads to a case of self-loathing, for having sexual needs which a partner doesn't understand, or much worse, needs which are considered taboo and sinful (Homosexuality, Anal Sex, Group Sex, Fetishes, etc.) These complex emotions can wreak  havoc on a person's self-esteem, by creating severe internal conflicts and serious self-doubts. Now socially, sex can either liberate a person, or hold him prisoner. At times, the unfulfilled needs may get repressed and banished to the shadows, only to be played out later, in the form of sexual adventurism and crime. Just one look at the sexual crimes in our society today, and we can clearly understand just how healthy our collective self esteem is! The very society that frowns upon prostitution, is actually responsible for creating it, though everybody would like to pretend otherwise. The crux of the matter is that "sex" and "self esteem" are closely related; and one should not shy away from addressing any issues one might face regarding one's sexuality. Physical love is necessary for the survival of a relationship and one needs to make time and efforts to successfully create one's own sexual space. The positive effects of a good sex life can be seen in an increased work productivity, fewer illnesses and an increase in one's overall efficiency. Some people are haunted by sexual guilt and confusion and when they keep it all locked up, they suffer from unexplained physical pains and feel 'down in the dumps' mentally. Another problem with appreciation from the opposite sex, is the addiction to  external validation. Some people feel utterly worthless until they receive positive feedback about their looks or abilities on a regular basis. This can be downright devastating, as in these cases, there is a great dependence on external factors for one to feel good. While no one denies the "feel good factor" of sexual appreciation, it is up to each one of us, to decide just how much of control one must be giving to external factors, to determine our personal self-esteem. The appreciation may be theirs, but the esteem is entirely of the self and only the self can decide how much of appreciation and sex is enough.
Work woes - The sexual problems of busy peopleThat one day Mr. X took half a day off and sneaked into his house to surprise his wife, he found her not tending to the garden, but attending to Mr.XXX, the neighbor! Long after the echoes of the shotgun had died down and way after Mr. XXX hopped off, holding on to dear life with trousers around his ankles, Mr. X was found asking himself loudly - why me? Though this story does bring about some amusement, it really isn't amusing to know a whole lot of relationships just going bust all because of the sex word and deed. Couples today are busier than ever, and after the initial euphoria of the relationship wears off; work, career advancements, salary packages get more precedence. Relationships start going off into the realm of a comfort zone where physical touch, intimacy, and sex take a back seat as most people think - "there will be a lot of time for that later." However, time and tide wait for no one- not even bright career enthusiasts, who put their careers over their relationships, only to wake up one day to see their love gone wrong! This is not to say that careers and hefty pay packages and promotions are not important. After all, we can rightly hear one say, "One cannot survive by love and fresh air alone." However, just as it is compulsory to swipe your card at the office door, couples have to ensure that they save some swiping for the bedroom as well. Easier said than done? Perhaps! Here are some of the typical problems that plague the love life of busy people : We have a relationship, why do we need sex? That may be just one partner's opinion! A man who thinks for two and loves for two is going to be in for a nasty surprise at some point. Sure, work pressure will always be there and so will conference calls and decision making. So, if you think your partner is going to live by the memories of your last intimate encounter, you need to get a reality check. Sure, your partner will probably understand that you are busy and maybe the fault is not entirely yours- maybe she is busy too! Sooner or later, you will have to figure out whether you are just flat mates or a real couple. And a real couple does things together- laughs, meets, makes love, fights, makes up, and all that! A good sex life only reinforces the emotional bond between couples and takes the relationship to another level. Going purely by sexual intercourse, then yes, sexual intercourse is, of course, healthy and has a lot of physiological benefits to offer like reduction of pain and feel-good endorphins. Some of us might just take only that bit and have sex with the first available person in sight! The point is sex within the framework of a relationship, can give better results and can foster strong ties, but the guilt from cheating on your partner can also add another reason for stress, which considering your already busy life, could well be the final straw that broke the camel's back. We do have an annual vacation, don't we? Sure! Timeshare holidays and stock options can make the best of vacation places easily accessible. So, the deal is - take your annual vacation abroad and stop groaning! What if you were paid just once a year or were allowed to eat just once a week? Would make you feel really great, right? Relationships need more than your annual vacation. Even a regular walk in the morning together is a better idea than a vacation on a cruise liner. In our material aspirations, we forget that good things in life are completely free. If only you weren't so brand conscious, you would've seen them right away. So, don't save all that sex up for the annual vacation; a weekend getaway will, in fact, add more spunk to your life. Thinking of you! Even the thought that one is in someone's thoughts can be so warm and bring out the best in a person. People who have a partner waving them off when they set off to work are generally happy and more productive at the workplace and have fewer disagreements or upsets. So, imagine the good luck charm being quadrupled by lovemaking! Call it stolen moments of passion. Take a chance... you might just be a little late for work, but then this is important business too! Be spontaneous and watch your partner respond to your sense of urgency. If that's not possible, then at least send a "thinking of you" message, or if you are more creative, you can personalize it with your brand of naughtiness and raunchiness. Rest assured, this will help you actually find the time to make love on a regular basis and your girl might even find a new you and actually miss you when you are gone. Shift workers: Don't shift the blame...shift the time to make love. The tragedy of these times is when both people are out working and both are extremely ambitious and both work different shifts. He is dead tired when she is all up and chirpy. It is night for one, daytime for the other! Wow, what a predicament to be in! One weary soul bone tired and hardly in the mood for love making! Who says you have to go all the way every day. Even touch therapy can be extremely enchanting, healing, invigorating, and can eventually lead to sex. Imagine a hand that caresses your brow as you crib about your boss's bitchiness or the conference that you have been given single handedly to handle? A kiss exchanged at the right time can sometimes do way with the sex part if you are too tired for it. Important thing is to wake up in your lover's arms rather than wake up too late to the fact that you have no love life. This can be a beautiful experience and you can exchange places, giving your partner a sensual body massage when she comes back from her shift. Making love, for sure, is important, but what is more important is keeping the love alive for the making of it!
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