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Absent father, violent kids!When children are growing up, they undergo a lot of hormonal changes and have varying emotional requirements. If these requirements are not fulfilled by the presence of both parents, they can develop into violent adults. Single parenting for a mother, is extremely difficult; it is simply impossible for her to fill the void left behind by an absent father. When a couple cannot live under the same roof due to major differences, they separate or get divorced. However, the requirements of the children remains the same; they still need the care and love of their mother and the support and guidance of their father, to grow up without any complications or insecurities. Children usually look up to their father as a symbol of strength and security and in his absence, they might not receive the same support and may feel inadequate and insecure. If during their childhood kids do not get the support and security that only a father can provide, they might bottle up the feelings inside; and these feelings usually explode when they grow into violent adults. A Father's Absence is Critical Due to whatever reasons, if the father is not present in the family during the most important growing periods of the kids, they have more chances of turning to crime and drugs, than the children who have a father by their side. According to a research conducted by the Research Institute of the McGill University Health Center located in Quebec, a father's absence, especially during the child's prime growing period, can lead to behavioral problems when they grow into adults. The research was carried out on mice raised only by their mothers and showed that the mice that were brought up in the absence of their fathers, were  abnormal and aggressive in their social interactions. Gabriella Gobbi, who is an author and a senior associate professor at the McGill University - Faculty of Medicine, says that even though the experiment was carried out on mice, the findings are highly relevant to the behavior of humans, under similar circumstances. Role of Fathers and Fatherhood Another research carried out by Dr. David Popenoe, a renowned sociologist, throws light on the role of fatherhood and fathers. According to Popenoe, fathers should not be treated as mere second adults in the family. Fathers, who are more involved in their family, have a certain positive impact on the children, which no other person is capable of. Fatherhood is an important responsibility and the presence of fathers in a family, directly influences the well-being of the growing children. In the absence of fathers, mothers may try their level best to provide their children with the right kind of upbringing and education. However, they might fail to give the kids the support and strength that only a father can provide. Due to this, children fail to face the challenges of life head on and are unable to handle their problems with an open mind. When a lot of emotions get bottled up inside, in most cases, they find their release in the form of violence. Sometimes, children also lack the right kind of guidance in their growing years and mothers fail to handle their changing emotional requirements, due to which these kids become increasingly frustrated and violent as they grow up.  
Sunshine for busy executivesMost people working in corporate offices, spend long hours within the confines of concrete buildings. Some business sectors like IT and manufacturing even have their employees working in night shifts. What we don't realize is that, in such a setup, our bodies do not get adequate dosage of sunlight. Lack of exposure to sunlight is responsible for a range of diseases and health conditions. The body requires sunlight just as much it requires food for its nourishment. Long hours of work in glazed business buildings under artificial lighting, deprive the body of this most basic need, thereby creating a deficiency of the vitamin D group. This deficiency then goes on to create several imbalances in the body, and contributes to diseases. Besides these, Vitamin D deficiency can also cause general muscle weakness, muscle and bone aches and pains and osteoporosis, due to the inability to utilize calcium. The best source of Vitamin D is natural sunshine, and that's why it is called the sunshine vitamin. Vitamin D can be had in the supplement form too, but it is still no match for natural sunlight. In a paper titled 'Vitamin D Deficiency' published in The New England Journal, M F Holick writes that, arms and legs should get exposure to sun for 10-15 minutes every day. "The amount of vitamin D produced depends on the intensity of the UVB in the sun and many other factors. Darker-skinned individuals may need 5-10 times more exposure than a fair-skinned person, in order to make the same amount of vitamin D." Tap that sunlight Early morning is the best time to get out in the sun. There's no better time to get that walk, than in the morning. Park your car a little away from the office building if possible, and walk to your office in the sun. When you take a tea break in the evening, head outside, instead of going to the in-house cafeteria.
Perfect partners in crime - Midlife crisis and dementiaThe responses we have to common stressful events in our daily lives have a lasting impact on our brain structure. The effects of a stressful event last a very long time, though apparently we seem to have recovered from it. Researchers say that the stress hormones keep circulating in our body long after the stress has passed. According to a recent Swedish research study, our response to common life events may trigger long-lasting physiological changes in the brain. These interestingly shocking findings come from the Prospective Population Study of Women in Gothenburg, a long term study on 800 women that lasted for almost forty years. The women who were a part of this study were all born before 1930, and underwent regular neuropsychiatric tests. The study started in 1968 assessed women for any baseline stressors like workplace problems, widowhood, alcoholism and illness in the family. Women who had serious issues at the start of the study had a 21% higher risk of developing Alzheimer's Disease and 15% higher risk of developing dementia later on in life. Interestingly, having to take care of a mentally ill family member like a sibling or mother, was found to be a major cause for development of dementia later on in life. The findings of this study show that accumulated stress from common life events has severe physiological and psychological consequences. These physiological consequences include adverse effects on the central nervous, cardiovascular and endocrine and immune systems. There have been several studies that state that the effects of stressful events like earthquakes, cyclones and floods can have a lasting impact on life and often shape the person's personality. What makes this study interesting is its finding that daily stressors accumulated over a period of time and often left unresolved, have a lasting impact that shows up in later stages of life!
Just how sporty is your sports bra?Very few women in the world really know the right size of their bra and end up using wrong size bra all their life. A study shows that all over the world only 2 women out of 10 wear the right sized bra due to which they can never get the look they want. Since there is lot of difference in sports bra of different brands, you need time and patience to find out the most suitable one for you. You should keep on measuring yourself every year, and especially if you have added weight or lost weight. It is also necessary to check your bra-size after pregnancy.  On an average, the size of sports bra range from A to H and most women find a comfortable fit among either of this size. A good sports bra should always offer three things- support, comfort and breathability to the breasts. Choosing a Bra with a Good Fit Most of the elite bra shops offer good range of different sports bra. But it is important to know which one suits you or is of your size. A well fitting bra gives you the liberty to exercise or move with confidence and comfort. One thing you should keep in mind while purchasing a sports bra is your life style and preferences. Some like it padded, some like it embroidered, while some may like it simple. So apart from correct measurements, your style should be given preference while buying a sports bra. Moreover, you also should take into consideration the dress you are wearing on this bra. Here are some tips that can help you in selecting the right bra when you will go to the lingerie shop. Support   A good bra should offer your breast complete support, irrespective of whether they are small, medium or even big. If you have breasts ranging in between A to C cup, you should choose a compression bra that offers more comfort and support. If you are looking for a bra that also encapsulates and gives proper shape to your breasts then you should choose a bra accordingly. These bras offer more support than the compression bra. For getting both comfort and support, you can choose a compression bra that also encapsulates your breasts properly. Comfort You should feel comfortable when you wear a bra. It should stay in place and should not chafe. If possible, try one of the samples in the changing room and check whether the straps dig into your shoulders or whether the bands provide comfortable support to the breasts. The bra should hold the breasts comfortably without being restrictive. A good bra is one that holds your breasts in place even when you are performing all the jumping, running and swinging acts. Breathability The fabric of the sports bra should be good enough to wick away the sweat from the skin so that it dries quickly and allows the skin to breathe properly. The bra should allow excess heat and perspiration to pass through the fabric keeping you dry and cool during summer &  warm and dry during winter.  
High blood pressure in the little onesIf you are asked to paint a picture of a patient of hypertension, how would it look? Leave the details aside, would you paint an old person, a young person or a child? Most likely, you will paint an old person or may be a middle-aged person. But a child, who would think of a child to have high blood pressure! It may be difficult to believe for most but not only is it possible, its incidence is also increasing gradually. In fact, hypertension in kids is becoming quite common. Studies in USA show that up to 5% children and adolescents have hypertension. What is it? High blood pressure in children and adolescents is also called as pediatric hypertension. Pediatric hypertension is defined by the blood pressure recorded on the mercury, in comparison to the given standard range. As a child grows, there is rapid development in all the milestones. For children, there are percentiles defined for all parameters for various age groups. In children, when the blood pressure is above the 90th percentile but below the 95th, it is called prehypertension. When it is above 95th percentile, it is diagnosed as hypertension. There are no distinguishing symptoms of pediatric hypertension, so it may easily be missed. Please make it a practice to get your child's blood pressure checked on routine visits for medical examination. Why does it happen? High blood pressure in children under ten years of age is usually secondary to some other health condition. It could be due to an underlying heart disease, kidney disease, hormonal disorders or genetic abnormalities. This demands treatment of the main problem. Primary hypertension is noted in older children, over 6-10 years of age and adolescents. There is no specific cause identified for this, other than lifestyle, obesity, rich foods and family history. How bad could it get? Children may show a disordered sleep pattern when they have hypertension. They may suffer from sleep apnea, reflected by snoring or abnormal breathing. Besides sleep, the other effects of hypertension are the known ones. In the long run, it could lead to heart disease, stroke or kidney disease. What to do? It is very important to control the blood pressure from a young age. Regular check-ups and monitoring of the BP is needed. Thorough examination is a must to identify whether the hypertension is primary or secondary. Treatment by medicines is recommended in secondary hypertension, where the underlying condition is to be tackled along with the management of blood pressure. In cases of primary hypertension, medication is suggested only in extreme cases. Otherwise, lifestyle management is the key. It is not a healthy option to start anti-hypertensives this early in life. Give your child healthy food, help him/her maintain the ideal body weight and make sure he/she gets enough exercise physically. The sooner we identify the problem, the better are the results with a disciplined lifestyle. The unhealthy lifestyle is creating chaos in all our lives. How long the kids would have escaped? Our lifestyle reflects on our kids. Follow a healthy routine and keep the family healthy!
Sweetie, I am addicted to you!Research shows sugar can be more addictive than heroin. What was the last thing you ate or drank before reading this? Bread? Banana? Chocolate? Cake? Fries? Wafers? Doughnut? Biscuits? Soda? Juice? Wine? Vodka? Coffee? Tea? They are all sugars ultimately. Some taste sweet, some don't. The first thing we taste as babies is milk. It is naturally sweet. From that young age, we learn that sugar is what we like and what we want. You may be a sugar addict, if: You need 'something sweet' after every meal. You cannot have tea or coffee without that second pinch of sugar. Dessert is a must every time you eat out. You go hunting to the refrigerator looking for cake leftovers. A little bite of that chocolate bar is all you need to be happy. You are the one who finishes off the last piece of laddu in the house. You want ketchup with everything - fries, noodles, pizza, burger, samosa, kachori. You want all the above listed items because you just read their names. When out in the hot sun, water is not sufficient for you, you want flavored sweetened chilled drinks. A mocktail or a soda drink makes your dinner complete. And many more such things. So, you see, almost all of us are sugar addicts. Studies show every person in countries like, USA, UK and Australia, may be a sugar addict. The reasons behind the sugar addiction are manifold. First, beyond doubt sugar tastes awesome. Taste factor cannot be debated with. But do you know, the taste is conditioned? Cravings are not always and entirely natural. They are a result of what you give the body and teach your taste buds. Second, businesses heavily exploit this weakness for sugar. Wherever you go there is unimaginable variety of sugar products. A café, a restaurant, a general store, a superstore, a street cart - they all have several options for you to indulge in. How much can one resist and how much can on filter the menu! Third, sugar creates instant gratification. That does work for it and that does add to our trouble. A sad day at work and some chocolate perks you up. Feeling dull and bored, let's go out for an ice cream. This happens too often. Why sugar isn't that sweet? We feel what harm can little sweet do, being happy is more important. However, sugar is worse than many other food vices. As an experiment, check the contents of everything in your kitchen and count how many of them have sugar, in any amounts. Try skipping everything that has sugar in it for the next three days. You will be shocked. The options to eat cut down to several degrees if you skip sugar. The problem with sugar is it makes you want more. A bit does not satisfy you. Sugar increases the desire for sugar - immediate and long term, likewise. The moment you have a bite of something sweet, you cannot stop there, you need to eat another bite, and another, and another. In the long run, your taste buds are getting deeply conditioned for sugar cravings. Your body learns that every time the mind is feeling low, it should ask for sugar. That is how it has been taught to feel better. You are entering a vicious cycle when you entertain these cravings. Sugar is often defamed as a white poison. It is not an exaggeration. Sugar has no nutritive value, apart from generating energy in the body. It simply increases the risk of numerous health complications. Sugar is a known culprit for diabetes mellitus, obesity, heart disease, hormonal imbalance, sexual dysfunctions, and others. Sugar addiction is the most common addiction of all. It is difficult to leave sugar completely out, but one can always cut the portions. How to beat that addiction? Time for some action? All this information must be making you want to cut down on your sugar intake. Hold on. Alcohol, smoking, drugs - they are understood and accepted as addictions. So, there are support groups, people around us will motivate and help us to de-addict. Getting rid of our sugar addiction is even tougher. It will require tremendous amount of will power and determination. Are you ready for the challenge? Let us see some simple ways to de-addict from sugars: Drink less Cut down on all the artificially sweetened drinks - colas, orange, iced teas, flavored canned drinks, sodas. They have zero health benefit. The only reason why you have them is because of the taste factor. Remember the taste is momentary. Once inside the body, these drinks are creating havoc for your system. One spoon less - Tea or coffee? What do you need to start your day? Whatever it is, try reducing the sugar portions. If you take two spoons, try one. If you take one spoon, try half. It will be difficult in the beginning but eventually you will get used to it and you will even like it. Have whole fruits instead of juices. Anything drinkable in the cans contains sugar. Say no to cans. Eat less Give the ketchup bottles some rest. Decide your weekly chocolate quota. Don't let the moods overpower your decision. Bakery items are loaded with sugar, forget they exist. Turn a blind eye to that shelf when you go grocery shopping. A fan of breakfast cereal? Check the packets for sugar content. The ones that are flavoured have more sugar. Pick the plain ones. You can add your own choice of fruit and dry fruits for nutrition. Desserts should be a onetime thing, only when the occasion calls for it. You don't need them daily. Let the sweetness be in your words, not on your plate.
Crave for non-food substances to put in your mouth? Go ahead take your pica!We all have strong cravings in some form or the other, especially for food. Just thinking of a chocolate cake or ice cream can set the mouth watering and the hand creeping to open the refrigerator. However, some people have an unusual craving and it is to consume non-food items. Everyone knows that children are known to eat chalk, dirt or lick walls but at times, even adults have this unusual craving for non-food items. This condition is termed as 'Pica'. One can understand a child popping something into its mouth as it's discriminatory skills are not developed, but what about fully grown adults who have this habit? Is it a mental ailment? One can't really call it a full blown mental condition as it occurs commonly in pregnant women. The cravings are as strong as any other food craving and sometimes these people go out of the way to satiate their cravings. So, right from paint thinner, to chalk to ink, ice, plaster, paint, linoleum to plastic bits can form the obsession or craving. Pica is a combination of psychological and biochemical processes and is generally a deficiency which sets about these intense cravings.  When pica strikes pregnant women, then it could be a cause for much concern and the doctor should be kept informed. While it is easier to indulge a pregnant woman's ice cream cravings if she also develops a thing for iron fillings on top of her ice cream, then obviously it can be a rather dangerous thing to do. Ice and chalk are comparatively harmless and other than affecting the teeth and the taste, do nothing much else, but what about turpentine and toxic materials? They can definitely interfere with the body's digestive processes and can even spread harmful toxins in the body to cause blood poisoning, intestinal infections, bowel blockages and lead poisoning or arsenic poisoning.  If you have such strong non-food cravings then before you give in to them talk about it to a medical practitioner. It could well be an iron deficiency or perhaps even anemia which is attracting you to chew pencils up or making you pop dirt in your mouth. If you are pregnant then certainly the doctor will need to address the underlying issue and ensure that the pica goes away before you deliver. Wouldn't want you chewing up the baby's soother now would we?
5 cardinal sins for the skinWhile cigarettes may not constitute food in the strictest sense, it does have a profound effect on skin complexion, health, color and tone. We eat that we may live, but sometimes we eat way too much and consume stuff that may be extremely hazardous to our health. Since we are talking about skin, here are 5 most hazardous foods for your skin: Grease adds to the crease Since healthy skin is all about healthy blood circulation, any food which is likely to clog up the blood vessels internally is deemed bad for skin tone. Packaged snacks like potato chips may have edible oil written in bold but this contributes significantly to the slowing down of 'collagen and elastin syntheses' which in turn causes the skin to appear aged and all wrinkly. The french fries that we consume as a TV snack can also cause an acne outbreak on the skin and face. Gluten Glutton Gluten is a substance found in wheat and other food grains. We may not even be aware that some of the food grains have gluten as a main constituent. Gluten intolerance can also cause inflammations on the skin in the form of rashes or acne. Bad news is that the pizzas, pastas, cakes and bread that we get off the rack may be heavy in gluten (Surprised that they don't say that on the pack) and that may be the reason for you to lose precious skin tone. So seek gluten free foods, though that might not be the easiest of tasks, but for your skin, it certainly will be worth it. Caffeine - the skin coffin If you are one of those coffee addicts then you may as well write an obituary column lamenting the loss of your skin tone and complexion. It's not without reason that health freaks love bashing coffee beans and caffeine rich beverages, as they are truly hazardous. How? Studies have proven that just 2-3 cups stimulate pituitary-adrenocortical response. Yes, but what does that have to do with your skin? Well this leads to the hormone cortisol to increase in our bodies. Cortisol is known as the stress hormone! So now here's what it does to your skin -it accelerates the ageing process which means wrinkled skin and causes dehydration causing the skin to show an unusual pallor. So before you turn the coffee faucet on think twice. Fad to Black How fad diets are not skin friendly? Some people go on a high protein, low-carb diet which could sound the death knell as far as complexion goes. Dieting depletes calcium levels, which means your bones are going to suffer and what's the point of having skin on bad bone density? Besides low-carb diets can utterly wreck the complexion as the delicate PH balance in the skin is ruined. Some of the meat, poultry and dairy products too can have artificial chemicals injected in them which cause a hormonal imbalance in our bodies leading to skin disasters. Fruits and vegetables have chemicals injected too sometimes! Beware! Cereal Killers Cereal killers are those people who ignore the need of a proper diet for skin health. So anybody who indulges in too much sugar, caffeine and greasy food stuffs is a 'Cereal Killer' A lack of cereals in the diet can literally kill your skin. Cereal foods have high fiber and antioxidants for moisturizing the skin and protecting it from skin damage. For great skin other than cereals which are simply fabulous for keeping skin hydrated and breathing easily, one can eat fruits, olive oil, healthy fats, almonds, tofu, grains, nuts and the good old vitamin B rich products. Ceramides in raw food diets, organic foods, wheat germ and brown rice protect the epidermis of the skin and make it impervious to external attacks and pollutants while maintaining their tone and beauty.
Have that chocolate without any guiltYou may find this hard to believe, but chocolate is actually good for your health. Hold on, before you faint. Let's first get to the crux of the matter. Chocolate can actually be good for you if you eat it in moderate quantities. So what about all the bad effects of chocolate that people always talk about? Let's fume them all one by one:  Chocolate causes dental caries: Dear mummy, dental caries (cavities) are caused due to poor oral hygiene and consumption of foods rich in fermentable carbohydrates. When these carbohydrates are left in the tooth for a long time, they release an acid. This may damage the tooth enamel and cause tooth decay. In fact, chocolate contains tannin which actually prevents cavities from forming. So next time, dear mommies, let your child enjoy a small piece of chocolate. You can also join them in the treat.  Chocolate is loaded with fats and sugar:Yes, chocolate comprises of both saturated and unsaturated fats, but a majority of themare in the form of oleic acid and stearic acid. Now, oleic acid (present in olives) and stearic acid are good to lower the blood cholesterol levels. Also, the fat that is found in chocolate is added later, after the chocolate has been processed. So the higher content of cocoa in any bar ensures that there is less fat in the chocolate. So, what about the sugar?Sugar is bad, but the darker variety of chocolate has less sugar compared to the regular sweet chocolate. Dark means higher cocoa content and hence no room for other fillers likes cocoa butter, sugar, nuts, etc.  Chocolate contains no nutrients: On the contrary, it is rich in antioxidants.What is the work of an antioxidant? They scavenge the body of free radicals, which roam in body and cause ageing and diseases. Antioxidant flushes these free radicals out of your body. So, if you want to stay young, bite on a piece of chocolate once a week. Secondly, diets rich in antioxidants have been proven to lower the incidences of heart attacks, strokes, cardiovascular diseases, hyperlipidemia, and arthritis. Hence, I stand by the bar full of antioxidants;it's actually good for you.  Chocolate contains caffeine: Caffeine content in chocolatesis low as compared to your tea, coffee, or cola drinks. Now, having counted the amazing health benefits of chocolate, it is important to tell you which chocolate is healthy for you. The one which is in its purest form - thebittersweet one, which is high in cocoa content, is the clue to your healthy bar. So next time you crave a dessert, indulge in a small piece of chocolate to satisfy your sweet tooth and forget that guilt.  
Common causes of allergic reactionsAllergic reactions, most of the times, do not warrant immediate medical attention. But never ignore or take any allergic reaction lightly! Allergic reactions include itching or a puffy face or swollen red blotches all over your body or a fit of sneezing.  If we know what allergies have, we can avoid the triggers. So, here is a list Soaps and detergents: Are your palms are all rough and peeling off in patches and it doesn't seem to go away? Time to do a check on the dish-washing soaps and the detergents you may be using. Most of the brands contain harsh chemicals that burn while you use them. Medically known as Contact Allergic Dermatitis, this is one of the most common allergic reactions. Artificial Jewellery: Even the best looking jewellery can, at times, trigger allergic reactions. Another common type of Contact Allergic Dermatitis, this happens when you wear artificial jewellery. Most of the jewellery of this variety contains Nickel which is the main cause for this type of allergic reaction. Clothes: Clothes can be a cause for allergic reaction. While synthetic fibres like nylon and polyester are common factors, at times, the chemicals used in the dyeing can also be a reason for allergy. Add to it the perspiration and the constant friction between the skin and the clothes, and you have a severe allergic reaction guaranteed! Latex: Latex is also a very common cause for allergy. Commonly found in condoms, gloves and certain medical devices, allergy to latex can range from minor itching and redness, to a serious life-threatening anaphylactic reaction. Milk and milk products: The symptoms for this source of allergy include loose motions and stomach, among other things. Medically called as Lactose intolerance, it occurs in people who do not have the necessary enzymes in their bodies to digest milk and milk products. Food allergies: Peanuts, brinjal, fish etc can also trigger allergic reactions. Food reactions are specific to individuals. One may suffer from an allergic reaction to almost any kind of foodstuff. Beauty products: From shampoos and creams to nail paints and lipsticks, every cosmetic you use is a potential allergic trigger. Molds: These are microscopic fungi found in damp and moist places.. Allergic reactions to molds are pretty common and seasonal. Cockroach: The proteins secreted by the glands and the saliva of the cockroach can be allergic to humans. Sneezing, itchy and watery eyes are common symptoms. Insects: Insect stings can lead to burning and stinging pain with redness and a slight swelling around the bite/sting area. In some people though, insect bite/sting proves to be life threatening. Symptoms as severe as difficult breathing, rapid pulse, severe drop in blood pressure and swelling of face and throat may occur!
What Is slowing down your sex driveBeing sleep deprived can lower the levels of sex hormones in your body. Are you feeling dull lately and wondering what happened to your sex drive? May be, the stressors in your life are also creeping on to your bed. Find out some of causes that could be the reason behind this. Lack of sleep: Hectic work and busy life takes a toll on everybody. The first hit is your sleep - the hours go down, the quality reduces and the effects are insufficient. Sleeping six hours or less can push down the levels of testosterone in the body. Testosterone is the hormone that influences sex drive for both men and women. Though it is primarily a male hormone, it is also present in small quantities in all women and drives their sexual desires. Emotional problems: Stress, tensions, depressions, irritability, anger are negative emotions that lower the sex drive. Try not to bring the work pressures home. Marital problems or relationship issues may be hampering your bond with the spouse. Weight gain: Being overweight makes you lazy, tires you easy and decreases your self-confidence, especially in bed. When someone is not comfortable with his/her body image, it affects their sex drive. The pill: If the wife is on the contraceptive pills. The period of ovulation is the time in a menstrual cycle when there is a surge of testosterone in a woman's body. During this period, she experiences a strong sexual desire. The pills regulate the hormonal activity and reduce the sex drive to some extent. Alcohol: If you are feeling a little tipsy, be prepared to pass out and fall in deep sleep as you hit the bed. No scope for sex drive here. In the long run, increased consumption of alcohol can affect erections and make you generally dull. Diabetes Mellitus: Uncontrolled high blood sugar levels lead to impotence in men and dryness of the vagina in women. It also increases the risk for urinary infections. This results in lowered sex drive. Medicines: Some medicines like the anti-allergic ones and the antidepressants reduce the sex drive. Don't let complications of life affect the intimacy in your relationship.
Is sex linked to self esteem?Man is a curious creature, full of quirks and contradictions. Sexual intercourse, something that most people consider an intimate and private experience, is spoken about in hushed tones and often, with some discomfort. We don't reveal or talk about our sexual desires, as readily we discuss our salary packages or food habits. This is quite ironic seeing how sex is an important gauge for a person's self esteem and also an indicator of his/her social desirability. The very thing that we do under covers, we somehow choose to "keep under cover". The Link between Sex and Self Esteem: Self esteem is an important factor that determines the mental & physical well-being of an individual. All of us have a craving to be understood, liked and appreciated; and these form the equivalent of our basic needs on the inverted pyramid- Food, clothing and shelter. For a human being to flourish and prosper, consumable food, without the mental food of appreciation, is not enough; and sexual intercourse or an intimacy with the opposite sex, is one way of validating that need. Sex therefore, ceases to be just a physical need instilled by nature for the perpetuation of the species, but goes into the larger emotional cum psychological dimension of self actualization and realization. Though some of us might be embarrassed to broach the topic of 'whether or not we are getting enough', the truth is that every human seeks to achieve his sexual potential, even while he or she might, not be aware of it. Most of us have the ability to get the foods matching our taste preferences onto our plates, but with sex, this could be a little difficult, since sex, is a complex subject with a lot of social, moral and religious links. The truth is evident in the number of marriages (the very cornerstones of civil society) that fail on the basis of sexual compatibility, either by setting unrealistic sexual expectations or by not owning up to, or even identifying, one's sexual needs. This has repercussions on the psyche and self-esteem of a person, and this is especially true in the case of men in particular, as they may feel completely inferior for not being able to attract a sexual partner matching his desires. In some people, this also leads to a case of self-loathing, for having sexual needs which a partner doesn't understand, or much worse, needs which are considered taboo and sinful (Homosexuality, Anal Sex, Group Sex, Fetishes, etc.) These complex emotions can wreak  havoc on a person's self-esteem, by creating severe internal conflicts and serious self-doubts. Now socially, sex can either liberate a person, or hold him prisoner. At times, the unfulfilled needs may get repressed and banished to the shadows, only to be played out later, in the form of sexual adventurism and crime. Just one look at the sexual crimes in our society today, and we can clearly understand just how healthy our collective self esteem is! The very society that frowns upon prostitution, is actually responsible for creating it, though everybody would like to pretend otherwise. The crux of the matter is that "sex" and "self esteem" are closely related; and one should not shy away from addressing any issues one might face regarding one's sexuality. Physical love is necessary for the survival of a relationship and one needs to make time and efforts to successfully create one's own sexual space. The positive effects of a good sex life can be seen in an increased work productivity, fewer illnesses and an increase in one's overall efficiency. Some people are haunted by sexual guilt and confusion and when they keep it all locked up, they suffer from unexplained physical pains and feel 'down in the dumps' mentally. Another problem with appreciation from the opposite sex, is the addiction to  external validation. Some people feel utterly worthless until they receive positive feedback about their looks or abilities on a regular basis. This can be downright devastating, as in these cases, there is a great dependence on external factors for one to feel good. While no one denies the "feel good factor" of sexual appreciation, it is up to each one of us, to decide just how much of control one must be giving to external factors, to determine our personal self-esteem. The appreciation may be theirs, but the esteem is entirely of the self and only the self can decide how much of appreciation and sex is enough.
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