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Is male menopause a reality?As opposed to the sudden drop in ovulation and hormonal levels in women, menopause in men is a gradual process. The consequences in men aren't that clear. The health risks, though, are significant and it is important to recognize the symptoms of male menopause early on. Read along to know more. A testosterone level of 300-1200 ng/dL is considered normal in a healthy male. As one ages, the testosterone levels too drop gradually. After 30 years of age, the levels drop by 1% per year. By the time a man crosses 50 years of age, he is in menopause. Look out for the following signs to know if your testosterone levels are dropping : Low Libido : A low sex drive or decrease in inclination to have sex is the first sign of decreasing testosterone levels. Erectile Dysfunction : Testosterone is responsible for releasing nitric oxide that leads to erection. As the levels of testosterone decrease with age, getting an erection and maintaining it for longer periods of time may become difficult. Low Semen Level : The normal amount of semen ejaculated each time varies between 0.1 and 10 mL. This normal level is due to the efficient functioning of the testes, seminal vesicles, and prostate, all of which work under the influence of testosterone. As you age, the testosterone levels drop and the amount of semen ejaculated also drops. Orgasm Troubles : As you age, having an orgasm every time may be a bit difficult due to the dropping testosterone levels. Mood Swings : This happens in men as much as in women! The interesting thing here is that the man who suffers from it is the last one to note it and acknowledge. So, if you find yourself snapping and getting irritated at the smallest of things, get your testosterone levels checked. Depression : When you feel dull and demotivated at all times, and even doing the slightest of activity seems like a chore, it means that your testosterone levels have dropped to a significantly low level. Abdominal Fat : This is again an early sign of decreasing testosterone level. Belly fat is a sign of advancing age. Low testosterone levels are a sign of advancing age. Not all men who have low testosterone levels may show symptoms. In such cases, there is no need for any kind of treatment. Low testosterone may also be due to some other conditions like thyroid disease, excessive alcohol use, sleep apnea, etc. After 30 years of age, the levels of testosterone drop by 1% per year. By the time a man crosses 50 years of age he is in menopause. Identifying and eliminating these causes will restore the testosterone levels to normal. However, if no cause can be attributed to the low testosterone levels, it is a clear indication of normal aging and 'menopause.' As with women, men too have the option of hormone replacement therapy. However, this treatment is controversial. In some men, the testosterone replacement may relive several symptoms, but the risks far outweigh the benefits. An increased chance of heart attack, prostate cancer, and other health problems are associated with testosterone replacement therapy. Herbal supplements for problems associated with decreasing testosterone levels are generally considered safe, but they too have no proven health benefits and are known to increase the risks for prostate cancer. Male menopause isn't as dramatic and abrupt as the menopause in women, but it is a reality. It happens gradually over a period of several years.
Too much of these can be detrimental to healthModeration is the mantra for everything in life. There are a lot of things in our daily life that we do. Excess of these can be detrimental for your health. Let's see how: Television, Laptop, Mobile: That screen is torture for your eyes. Looking at the TV/ laptop/ mobile screen for too long can cause dryness of the eyes. It also makes the mind dull and inactive. Even though you have not done anything much, you feel tired. It is also unhealthy for your social and personal life. Gadgets are meant to add convenience to your life, and not alienate you from real people. These also lead to sedentary lifestyle which further triggers obesity, hypertension, diabetes and other chronic ailments. Travelling: Many of us travel for work, for education. Frequent meetings are a part of work life. Some like to holiday a lot. But too much traveling upsets routine for the body. It changes schedules too often, adds new stressors to an ordinary day. Food options also get limited and sleeping patterns are influenced. If your job demands excessive travel, make sure you consciously put an effort to choose a healthy lifestyle when away from home. Worrying: Worry is unavoidable. Think of a day you did not worry about anything, isn't it difficult? Normal stress is a part of life, but if you are worrying too much, you are weakening your immune system in more ways than one. It makes you weak, susceptible to infections, prone to lifestyle diseases, and also affects your social life and relationships. Vitamin supplements: Supplements are not your daily diet. Have them in moderation and with due consultation from a doctor. Some vitamins get stored in the body when taken in excess quantities. This can result in condition called as hypervitaminosis and various health problems. Exercise: Body is not a mechanical machine that can keep functioning at the click of a switch. Even a machine needs oiling and repairs. If you love to exercise, that's great. But don't do it all day. Too much physical exercise is strain on the body. It can lead to muscle exhaustion, weakness, breakdown and may even damage the kidneys. Sleeping: Sleeping is the rest the body needs but too much of rest means rusting. Oversleeping makes you dull and may even trigger your migraines. It annoys the body clock and may create metabolic disturbances Social Networking: This is not good for your mental health. Those two hundred friends who like and comment are not your world; the one whom you call when you want to cry is your friend. Posting images and sharing updates on social media is fine, but it is more important to talk to those who live with you, who are physically around. Many peer pressures and image issues also arise from excessive social networking and people may tend to live in a 'make believe' world.
Dilemma of a working woman - How to stay healthy!Women want to be healthy and beautiful. But most of us are not able to find the time to exercise or plan our meals. We pay more attention and money on therapies to look good externally. But good looks come from good health, and good health is an outcome of a healthy lifestyle. Healthy lifestyle helps in preventing illnesses and makes us more efficient. Improper and irregular diet, lack of physical activity, and stress are the chief causes of poor physical and mental health. Most working women today are occupied with their desk jobs, and as a result have a sedentary lifestyle. Eating junk food most of the times makes the matter worse. So if you want to stay healthy, here are some changes you can make. Add movement to life. Activities like walking, gardening, swimming or aerobics help build endurance and relieve stress. Choose something which you think you can consistently - Yoga, aerobics, cycling or even dancing. Balanced diet plays a pivotal role in fitness. Fruits, vegetables, and whole grains are a must in your diet. Antioxidants in fruits have an anti-ageing effect. Choose to eat in order to satisfy hunger and build healthy body, and not to feed your emotions. Avoid junk and processed food. They are empty calories. Drink water. Dehydration affects metabolism. Drink 8-10 glasses a day to flush out the toxins. Add liquids like milk, fruit juices to your diet. Positive thoughts help build a healthy mind and a healthy mind ensures healthy body. Do not smoke cigarettes or drink alcohol to deal with stress. Try yoga, meditation, listen to music, or take a nice shower to relax. Rest and relaxation helps to cope with daily stress. Making these lifestyle changes as a regimen will surely help working women to live a life of health, wellness and fitness.  
Smell like roses, without the thornsYou bathe regularly and use the best possible deodorants, underarm anti-perspirants, panty perfume but the bad odour just doesn't go away. Pat yourself dry Very often you have a leisurely bath with scented bubbles and what not but when it comes to drying your body thoroughly, well you just pat yourself quickly, for you are in a hurry. The moisture on your body then attracts bacteria with fungi and they cause that embarrassing mouldy kind of stench on your body. So make sure you dab yourself thoroughly dry all over your body. Especially in places like the lower back where it is difficult to reach without some really flexible shoulder joints. Use the archer's swipe (The towel extended between the right hand over the head with  the left hand extended back to form the bottom grip, which looks like an archer reaching for a bow from the quiver). In case you are endowed with love handles and folds of fat then be generous with the patting, as those are the parts most susceptible to host bacteria. Change clothes often If you wear the same set of clothes and lingerie then you are surely going to have an odour which is lingering. So for those ladies who occasionly wear the same set of clothes without washing, the sweat is going to accumulate in there and raise a stink. Remember the Celine Dion song? It's a new day, a new start! Menstruation + Stress = Bad smell There is nothing that you can really do about your periods. Instead, try and be a little more extra careful during those 4 days. You can have an extra jab at the deo bottle or perfume lotion. However stress, nervousness and fear also leave chemical traces which come out along with the sweat. This adds to the bad odour. Humble pie for dessert? What you eat also affects the way you smell. Go easy on the garlic, onion rings and fish for they can make you smell slightly worse than an open sewer. Always rinse your mouth after eating and use a good minty mouthwash if at all you choose to pepper your meal with onion and garlic to ward offthe evil eye. You can add conditions like diabetes to cause a fruity kind of odour. Well in that case make sure you exercise regularly so that the skin sweats out the toxins. In case you are the extra-sweaty types then use medicated soaps or ensure you use steam baths regularly to keep your skin pores open.
Stress - Even kids cannot escape!Often when we feel overwhelmed with stress, we go back in the past and reflect. We miss our golden days of childhood.We think of those days with fondness, miss the free and carefree times. We feel like becoming kids again. But the truth is that at no age are we free of stress and worries. It is just that with time, we move on to newer situations and every new stressor seems worse than the previous one. Children stress out too, some more than the others. Stressors Simple things like a test in school, a Physical Training class or poem recital could mean a lot of stress for the little ones. The desire to meet the expectations of parents or teachers also creates tremendous pressure on the children. They are eager to do well at all the times and the smallest failures can upset these kids immensely. Peer groups are difficult to manage. In childhood, the social maturity is not sufficiently developed to handle day-to-day conflicts. Trivial fights or comments from classmates and friends can lead to a long-lasting impact on the vulnerable minds. They get easily influenced by their friends. Elder siblings also play a major role. Some act as mentors, some as bullies. Some cause damage unknowingly, some are plain indifferent. Life is full of new things and childhood is a fast-track learning lesson. Every other day, there is something new a child has to do. Meet a new kid, learn a new subject, try to dodge a ball differently or ride a bicycle without side wheels; there is too much to learn. These cause anxiety and may make the child nervous. Performance pressures, technology, precocity, media influences, etc. are some of the other factors that add to the stress in childhood. Signs Watch out for subtle changes in moods and behaviour. With adults, it is easier to identify the stress and hence rectify it. But with children, it is quite a challenge. Most of the children are themselves unaware of the stress they are facing, they don't understand why they are feeling sad or angry or fearful. They are just not at ease. Inordinate crying or screaming is a common sign. Being withdrawn, aloof and quiet is another way by which kids express their tensions. Physical signs can be seen in basic physiological changes - in sleep patterns (oversleeping or inability to sleep), eating habits (not eating or eating too much), frequent aches and pains, especially digestion disturbances and headaches, etc. Managing childhood stress Pay attention to your child. Listen to what he/she is saying, but also try to listen to what he/she is not saying in words, although only in action. Help the kids open up to you, spend quality time with them and talk to them about everything under the sun. Be well connected with their school teachers and parents of their closest friends. If the need be, please don't hesitate to reach out and seek professional help from psychologists and child counsellors. "One of the luckiest things that can happen to you in life is, I think, to have a happy childhood." - Agatha Christie  
Algophobia: The fear of painAlgophobia is the fear of pain:  an abnormal and consistent feeling that is far beyond what would be considered normal. The term is derived from the Greek words, Algos meaning pain and Phobos meaning fear. Our bodies are designed in a way that when there is a painful stimulus it reacts. How the body reacts to the pain is an individualistic phenomenon. Some people have a very low threshold for pain, and even the slightest pain evokes a huge response in them. Where as others can withstand a good amount of physical pain before their bodies give in. Some people dread even the tiniest amount of pain. They foresee situations that will cause pain in them. The way they react to even the smallest amount of pain is far more than the normal level of acceptance. Such people are said to be suffering from Algophobia. Algophobia is a learned behaviour, say behavioral psychologists. For example you may have heard from several people how hitting your shin on the furniture in the dark is the worst possible pain ever. So you tend to keep a watch and if it is dark, you move around extra-carefully to avoid bumping into the furniture and getting hurt. This would be considered normal, cautious behaviour. But if the same thought keeps buzzing in your head continuously and you go to extreme lengths to avoid that pain, you could be algophobic. Old people are the ones who have excessive fear. The age factor along with fear of death plays a vital role in old people developing this fear. For example an old lady may hear about all the ailments and pains that afflict old age people and may become apprehensive about it. She may develop irrational fears that more often than not, are also imaginary. She may start experiencing the pains even before anything actually happens to her. It may seem unrealistic to a normal person, but for algophobics pain can be a severely dreaded thing. Therefore they will go to great lengths to avoid pain at all levels, including day-to-day activities. They will not go into the dark, handle tools, avoid lifting heavy objects or even avoid playing any type of contact sports. If a task has a scope for injury and pain, they will avoid it! Frequently a pathological complaint of Hyperalgesia occurs along with algophobia. Hyperalgesia is a condition of increased sensitivity to pain due to damage to the peripheral nerves and pain receptors. Pain in such cases may be directly in the damaged tissues or in the surrounding areas. An interesting fact is that hyperalgesia can occur due to long term use of painkillers especially strong ones like opium and its derivatives. Algophobia is treated with behavioural therapy, psychotherapy and anti-anxiety medications. Hypnotherapy also has shown beneficial effects.  
Have that chocolate without any guiltYou may find this hard to believe, but chocolate is actually good for your health. Hold on, before you faint. Let's first get to the crux of the matter. Chocolate can actually be good for you if you eat it in moderate quantities. So what about all the bad effects of chocolate that people always talk about? Let's fume them all one by one:  Chocolate causes dental caries: Dear mummy, dental caries (cavities) are caused due to poor oral hygiene and consumption of foods rich in fermentable carbohydrates. When these carbohydrates are left in the tooth for a long time, they release an acid. This may damage the tooth enamel and cause tooth decay. In fact, chocolate contains tannin which actually prevents cavities from forming. So next time, dear mommies, let your child enjoy a small piece of chocolate. You can also join them in the treat.  Chocolate is loaded with fats and sugar:Yes, chocolate comprises of both saturated and unsaturated fats, but a majority of themare in the form of oleic acid and stearic acid. Now, oleic acid (present in olives) and stearic acid are good to lower the blood cholesterol levels. Also, the fat that is found in chocolate is added later, after the chocolate has been processed. So the higher content of cocoa in any bar ensures that there is less fat in the chocolate. So, what about the sugar?Sugar is bad, but the darker variety of chocolate has less sugar compared to the regular sweet chocolate. Dark means higher cocoa content and hence no room for other fillers likes cocoa butter, sugar, nuts, etc.  Chocolate contains no nutrients: On the contrary, it is rich in antioxidants.What is the work of an antioxidant? They scavenge the body of free radicals, which roam in body and cause ageing and diseases. Antioxidant flushes these free radicals out of your body. So, if you want to stay young, bite on a piece of chocolate once a week. Secondly, diets rich in antioxidants have been proven to lower the incidences of heart attacks, strokes, cardiovascular diseases, hyperlipidemia, and arthritis. Hence, I stand by the bar full of antioxidants;it's actually good for you.  Chocolate contains caffeine: Caffeine content in chocolatesis low as compared to your tea, coffee, or cola drinks. Now, having counted the amazing health benefits of chocolate, it is important to tell you which chocolate is healthy for you. The one which is in its purest form - thebittersweet one, which is high in cocoa content, is the clue to your healthy bar. So next time you crave a dessert, indulge in a small piece of chocolate to satisfy your sweet tooth and forget that guilt.  
The age of nutritionAdvantages of Healthy Eating: Increased mental acuteness Resistance to illness and disease Higher energy levels More strong immune system Faster recuperation times Better management of chronic health problems Eating Obstacles for Seniors:  Lifestyle changes: Lifestyle changes can be an eating obstacle. For example single seniors may not know how to cook or may not like eating alone. Activity level: Seniors often cut back on activity for physical and medical reasons. Weight gain can result from the decrease in calories burned. Metabolism: Every year over the age of forty, our metabolism slows down. This means that even if you continue to eat the same amount and kinds of food as when you were younger, you're likely to gain weight because you're burning fewer calories. In addition, you may be less physically active now. Taste and appetite: The senses of taste and smell diminish, so one may be inclined to season one's food more heavily than before even though seniors need less salt than younger people. One may struggle with loss of appetite due to lifestyle, loneliness or a medical condition. Health Issues: Physical ailments and prescription medications, become a daily exercise, and ends up often negatively influencing appetite. Digestion:Due to changes in your digestive system, you generate less saliva and stomach acid as you get older, making it more difficult for your body to process certain vitamins and minerals, such as B12, B6 and folic acid, which are necessary to maintain mental alertness, a keen memory and good circulation. Emotional Factors: Emotional factors such as loneliness and depression can affect your diet. For some, feeling down leads to not eating and in others it may trigger overeating. Specific Nutritional Recommendations for Seniors: Some important guidelines for seniors include Reduce sodium (salt) to prevent high blood pressure, Monitor fat intake in order to maintain healthy cholesterol levels Consume more calcium and vitamin D for bone health Eat more fibre-rich foods to prevent constipation Cut back on sugar and on dry foods Ensure getting recommended amount of important vitamins and minerals Increase water intake, and Perform regular physical activity Eating well as you age is easier than you think: Focus on good carbohydrates. Opt for whole grain nutrition (brown rice, whole wheat bread, rolled oats, barley, and millet), not refined "white" products, such as white bread, white rice, or products made with white flour. To manage weight and maintain optimum health, focus on eating efficiently. This means choosing foods that maximize nutritional value, not calories. Whole, natural, fresh foods such as fruits and vegetables, whole grains, nuts, legumes, healthy sources of protein (poultry, fish, eggs, and tofu) and dairy products that contain calcium constitute efficient eating. Highly processed and refined foods usually contain more calories and fewer nutrients. Raw equals roughage! Aim to eat at least one daily serving of your fruits and vegetables raw. This not only preserves their nutritional value, it's an easy way to eliminate constipation. Steaming is the best way to cook vegetables; it preserves nutrients. Light sauting is next. Bone up on calcium. All dairy products are not created equal. Milk, cheese and yogurt retain their calcium content; cream cheese, cream and butter do not. As part of a healthy senior diet, choose fat-free or low fat dairy products. Choose first-rate fats. Get your "good" fats from oils such as olive oil and sunflower oil, avocados and avocado oil, nuts and seeds. Keep it moist. In addition to drinking enough water each day, aim to consume foods with high water content. Staying properly hydrated flushes toxins from your body, relieves constipation, helps keep your joints flexible and your mind clear. High water content foods include melons, grapes, cucumbers, onions, apples, cabbage, and, of course, soup.
Hypertension and Vitamin DVitamin D is one of the essential vitamins that are required for strong and healthy bones. The body synthesizes it in the skin from cholesterol when there is adequate exposure to sunlight. Over the past decade, vitamin D has been intriguing medical researchers the world over. Several studies were conducted and interesting results found. One of them being that vitamin D may be implicated in influencing blood pressure levels. As per studies conducted, it was found that low levels of vitamin D lead to high blood pressure levels. People living in high altitudes where sunlight is at a minimum level were found to be hypertensive. Also, the winter season showed an increase in hypertension cases which was again attributed to the low sunlight levels. What exactly does vitamin D do to affect the blood pressure? Renin is an enzyme secreted by the kidneys that constricts the blood vessels and increases the blood pressure. Vitamin D acts by inhibiting this renin. Insulin resistance causes high blood pressure, which is why hypertension often has co-morbidity with diabetes mellitus. Vitamin D helps in improving the body's sensitivity to insulin. Calcium deposits on the arterial walls harden them and make them lose their elasticity leading to an increase in the pressure of blood flowing through them. Vitamin D helps the body to better absorb and metabolize the calcium. The role of vitamin D in strengthening bones is very clear. Though the studies have shown that people having deficiency in vitamin D tend to develop hypertension, the role of vitamin D in this case is still not very clear. Also, whether vitamin D supplements help in lowering blood pressure levels is still to be found out! But all said and done, the research findings cannot be ignored. Moreover, a morning walk is beneficial in many other ways as well! So, get up early, put on your walking shoes and say Hello to the sun! Vitamin D alone will not help you control your BP. You need to keep taking the medications along with the other dietary and life-style changes! An early morning walk is a blessing for the whole day!
Common causes of allergic reactionsAllergic reactions, most of the times, do not warrant immediate medical attention. But never ignore or take any allergic reaction lightly! Allergic reactions include itching or a puffy face or swollen red blotches all over your body or a fit of sneezing.  If we know what allergies have, we can avoid the triggers. So, here is a list Soaps and detergents: Are your palms are all rough and peeling off in patches and it doesn't seem to go away? Time to do a check on the dish-washing soaps and the detergents you may be using. Most of the brands contain harsh chemicals that burn while you use them. Medically known as Contact Allergic Dermatitis, this is one of the most common allergic reactions. Artificial Jewellery: Even the best looking jewellery can, at times, trigger allergic reactions. Another common type of Contact Allergic Dermatitis, this happens when you wear artificial jewellery. Most of the jewellery of this variety contains Nickel which is the main cause for this type of allergic reaction. Clothes: Clothes can be a cause for allergic reaction. While synthetic fibres like nylon and polyester are common factors, at times, the chemicals used in the dyeing can also be a reason for allergy. Add to it the perspiration and the constant friction between the skin and the clothes, and you have a severe allergic reaction guaranteed! Latex: Latex is also a very common cause for allergy. Commonly found in condoms, gloves and certain medical devices, allergy to latex can range from minor itching and redness, to a serious life-threatening anaphylactic reaction. Milk and milk products: The symptoms for this source of allergy include loose motions and stomach, among other things. Medically called as Lactose intolerance, it occurs in people who do not have the necessary enzymes in their bodies to digest milk and milk products. Food allergies: Peanuts, brinjal, fish etc can also trigger allergic reactions. Food reactions are specific to individuals. One may suffer from an allergic reaction to almost any kind of foodstuff. Beauty products: From shampoos and creams to nail paints and lipsticks, every cosmetic you use is a potential allergic trigger. Molds: These are microscopic fungi found in damp and moist places.. Allergic reactions to molds are pretty common and seasonal. Cockroach: The proteins secreted by the glands and the saliva of the cockroach can be allergic to humans. Sneezing, itchy and watery eyes are common symptoms. Insects: Insect stings can lead to burning and stinging pain with redness and a slight swelling around the bite/sting area. In some people though, insect bite/sting proves to be life threatening. Symptoms as severe as difficult breathing, rapid pulse, severe drop in blood pressure and swelling of face and throat may occur!
Is sex linked to self esteem?Man is a curious creature, full of quirks and contradictions. Sexual intercourse, something that most people consider an intimate and private experience, is spoken about in hushed tones and often, with some discomfort. We don't reveal or talk about our sexual desires, as readily we discuss our salary packages or food habits. This is quite ironic seeing how sex is an important gauge for a person's self esteem and also an indicator of his/her social desirability. The very thing that we do under covers, we somehow choose to "keep under cover". The Link between Sex and Self Esteem: Self esteem is an important factor that determines the mental & physical well-being of an individual. All of us have a craving to be understood, liked and appreciated; and these form the equivalent of our basic needs on the inverted pyramid- Food, clothing and shelter. For a human being to flourish and prosper, consumable food, without the mental food of appreciation, is not enough; and sexual intercourse or an intimacy with the opposite sex, is one way of validating that need. Sex therefore, ceases to be just a physical need instilled by nature for the perpetuation of the species, but goes into the larger emotional cum psychological dimension of self actualization and realization. Though some of us might be embarrassed to broach the topic of 'whether or not we are getting enough', the truth is that every human seeks to achieve his sexual potential, even while he or she might, not be aware of it. Most of us have the ability to get the foods matching our taste preferences onto our plates, but with sex, this could be a little difficult, since sex, is a complex subject with a lot of social, moral and religious links. The truth is evident in the number of marriages (the very cornerstones of civil society) that fail on the basis of sexual compatibility, either by setting unrealistic sexual expectations or by not owning up to, or even identifying, one's sexual needs. This has repercussions on the psyche and self-esteem of a person, and this is especially true in the case of men in particular, as they may feel completely inferior for not being able to attract a sexual partner matching his desires. In some people, this also leads to a case of self-loathing, for having sexual needs which a partner doesn't understand, or much worse, needs which are considered taboo and sinful (Homosexuality, Anal Sex, Group Sex, Fetishes, etc.) These complex emotions can wreak  havoc on a person's self-esteem, by creating severe internal conflicts and serious self-doubts. Now socially, sex can either liberate a person, or hold him prisoner. At times, the unfulfilled needs may get repressed and banished to the shadows, only to be played out later, in the form of sexual adventurism and crime. Just one look at the sexual crimes in our society today, and we can clearly understand just how healthy our collective self esteem is! The very society that frowns upon prostitution, is actually responsible for creating it, though everybody would like to pretend otherwise. The crux of the matter is that "sex" and "self esteem" are closely related; and one should not shy away from addressing any issues one might face regarding one's sexuality. Physical love is necessary for the survival of a relationship and one needs to make time and efforts to successfully create one's own sexual space. The positive effects of a good sex life can be seen in an increased work productivity, fewer illnesses and an increase in one's overall efficiency. Some people are haunted by sexual guilt and confusion and when they keep it all locked up, they suffer from unexplained physical pains and feel 'down in the dumps' mentally. Another problem with appreciation from the opposite sex, is the addiction to  external validation. Some people feel utterly worthless until they receive positive feedback about their looks or abilities on a regular basis. This can be downright devastating, as in these cases, there is a great dependence on external factors for one to feel good. While no one denies the "feel good factor" of sexual appreciation, it is up to each one of us, to decide just how much of control one must be giving to external factors, to determine our personal self-esteem. The appreciation may be theirs, but the esteem is entirely of the self and only the self can decide how much of appreciation and sex is enough.
Work woes - The sexual problems of busy peopleThat one day Mr. X took half a day off and sneaked into his house to surprise his wife, he found her not tending to the garden, but attending to Mr.XXX, the neighbor! Long after the echoes of the shotgun had died down and way after Mr. XXX hopped off, holding on to dear life with trousers around his ankles, Mr. X was found asking himself loudly - why me? Though this story does bring about some amusement, it really isn't amusing to know a whole lot of relationships just going bust all because of the sex word and deed. Couples today are busier than ever, and after the initial euphoria of the relationship wears off; work, career advancements, salary packages get more precedence. Relationships start going off into the realm of a comfort zone where physical touch, intimacy, and sex take a back seat as most people think - "there will be a lot of time for that later." However, time and tide wait for no one- not even bright career enthusiasts, who put their careers over their relationships, only to wake up one day to see their love gone wrong! This is not to say that careers and hefty pay packages and promotions are not important. After all, we can rightly hear one say, "One cannot survive by love and fresh air alone." However, just as it is compulsory to swipe your card at the office door, couples have to ensure that they save some swiping for the bedroom as well. Easier said than done? Perhaps! Here are some of the typical problems that plague the love life of busy people : We have a relationship, why do we need sex? That may be just one partner's opinion! A man who thinks for two and loves for two is going to be in for a nasty surprise at some point. Sure, work pressure will always be there and so will conference calls and decision making. So, if you think your partner is going to live by the memories of your last intimate encounter, you need to get a reality check. Sure, your partner will probably understand that you are busy and maybe the fault is not entirely yours- maybe she is busy too! Sooner or later, you will have to figure out whether you are just flat mates or a real couple. And a real couple does things together- laughs, meets, makes love, fights, makes up, and all that! A good sex life only reinforces the emotional bond between couples and takes the relationship to another level. Going purely by sexual intercourse, then yes, sexual intercourse is, of course, healthy and has a lot of physiological benefits to offer like reduction of pain and feel-good endorphins. Some of us might just take only that bit and have sex with the first available person in sight! The point is sex within the framework of a relationship, can give better results and can foster strong ties, but the guilt from cheating on your partner can also add another reason for stress, which considering your already busy life, could well be the final straw that broke the camel's back. We do have an annual vacation, don't we? Sure! Timeshare holidays and stock options can make the best of vacation places easily accessible. So, the deal is - take your annual vacation abroad and stop groaning! What if you were paid just once a year or were allowed to eat just once a week? Would make you feel really great, right? Relationships need more than your annual vacation. Even a regular walk in the morning together is a better idea than a vacation on a cruise liner. In our material aspirations, we forget that good things in life are completely free. If only you weren't so brand conscious, you would've seen them right away. So, don't save all that sex up for the annual vacation; a weekend getaway will, in fact, add more spunk to your life. Thinking of you! Even the thought that one is in someone's thoughts can be so warm and bring out the best in a person. People who have a partner waving them off when they set off to work are generally happy and more productive at the workplace and have fewer disagreements or upsets. So, imagine the good luck charm being quadrupled by lovemaking! Call it stolen moments of passion. Take a chance... you might just be a little late for work, but then this is important business too! Be spontaneous and watch your partner respond to your sense of urgency. If that's not possible, then at least send a "thinking of you" message, or if you are more creative, you can personalize it with your brand of naughtiness and raunchiness. Rest assured, this will help you actually find the time to make love on a regular basis and your girl might even find a new you and actually miss you when you are gone. Shift workers: Don't shift the blame...shift the time to make love. The tragedy of these times is when both people are out working and both are extremely ambitious and both work different shifts. He is dead tired when she is all up and chirpy. It is night for one, daytime for the other! Wow, what a predicament to be in! One weary soul bone tired and hardly in the mood for love making! Who says you have to go all the way every day. Even touch therapy can be extremely enchanting, healing, invigorating, and can eventually lead to sex. Imagine a hand that caresses your brow as you crib about your boss's bitchiness or the conference that you have been given single handedly to handle? A kiss exchanged at the right time can sometimes do way with the sex part if you are too tired for it. Important thing is to wake up in your lover's arms rather than wake up too late to the fact that you have no love life. This can be a beautiful experience and you can exchange places, giving your partner a sensual body massage when she comes back from her shift. Making love, for sure, is important, but what is more important is keeping the love alive for the making of it!
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