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Tips for the new fatherWhen a baby is born, all the attention is on the mother and the baby. And rightfully so, since the two need all the care in the world. However, the role of the father is very important even at this stage. The new dad has lot of responsibilities on his hand - he has to take care of both mom and the baby without getting annoyed or irritated. Here's how to do your best as husband and dad: Playing an active role in your child's life is vital for his emotional, physical, and cognitive development. Hold your baby as often as possible. By directly caring for your infant, you will learn about the baby's needs, how he communicates, and what comforts him best. Be prepared to feel left out at times. Your wife utilizes most of her energy and attention on the new baby. Be extra supportive and patient. Delivering a baby can be traumatic. Hormones ebb and flow. If there is ever a time to understand and care for your wife, this is it. Dads need to be more supportive and helpful. Share tasks like changing diapers, help around in the house by doing some household work like laundry. Talk to other new fathers about your experience and theirs. Most new parents experience a loss of sexual intimacy. Abstinence during pregnancy, pain, perineal tear, and breastfeeding can inhibit a woman's desire to have sex. Men can feel betrayed if rejected physically and mentally. It is important to talk about your feelings. Choose ways like cuddling, kissing, and holding hands to be physically intimate. One of main roles of a father is that of a protector. There are many ways you need to do this. Safety is one: child-proof your home. Dads now need to take care of driving, diet, and risk taking. Your baby needs you for a long time. Being healthy and happy dad is one of the greatest gifts you can give your kid. Dads need to provide financial protection to the new child. So get a life insurance, car insurance, an emergency fund, and a will. Try your best to spend as much time as possible with your new baby. While work may be your passion, it won't be long before children grown and no longer want to spend time with you. Take advantage of these years. Give the tiny tot gentle hugs. Dads shouldn't be afraid to show affection. Babies need physical contact, and not just from their moms. Snuggle with them, hug them, and kiss them. Read a baby-book to your child. Babies do understand. Sing him a gentle song or play a very soft music. Find out what makes your baby happy. Be good to the mom. Dads should be good and loving to mother of their new baby. Give her some time alone and babysit while she goes out, show affection to her, and give her little surprises. Because when the mom is happy, the baby is happy and the dad will be happy too.  
Broad chest, weak lungs - Are men more prone to respiratory diseases?The long-standing, chronic afflictionof the respiratory disease is called as COPD, i.e., Chronic Obstructive Pulmonary Disease. COPD is the obstruction within the lung tissue, causing improper circulation and entrapment of air. This limits the space for air to move in and out, directly affecting the quality of inhalation. A small reminder here may be necessary - breathing is synonymous with life, why? Because that's how we get oxygen, which is vital for the functioning of each and every cell within the body. With COPD, the ability to take in oxygen gets compromised increasingly. Continued cough, sputum, and shortness of breath are the main symptoms. COPD is more common in men. Does it have to do anything with being a male? Not necessarily. No specific link has been established to say that COPD risk is higher for you solely because you are a man. Then, what could it be? A study conducted in 2011 in USA showed that the number of men who smoke is 5% more than the women who do. To understand the reason behind this, let us see the primary causes of this disease. Air pollution, some genetic predispositions, frequent acute infections, exposure to harmful chemicals for a long time (usually occupational) - are some of the main causes, and the number one cause is smoking, owing to almost 80-90% of the cases. Park this thought. Next piece of information is simply revisiting some facts you may already know: #The gender classification ofsmokers - Men are known to smoke more than women all over the world, not only in numbers, but also in quantity. Whether it is a developing country or a developed one, 2011 studies say there are more male smokers everywhere than female smokers. Not only there are more men who smoke, they smoke for longer periods and more number of cigarettes than female smokers. This may vary from country to country, like India has much less women smokers than USA does, but the difference between the two genders holds true everywhere, only the ratios differ. #Occupational exposure to harmful chemicals and gases - These are industries of mining, textile, chemical engineering, welding, etc. The number of men working in such industries is way higher than women. #Air pollution - Men are more exposed to air pollution since they are outdoors more than women. This may not apply to all countries and societies, but is generally true. Now, we can put the pieces together and understand why COPD is more common in men? Yes, they are at a higher risk because of higher exposure to smoking, pollutants and irritants. Cigarette smoking is the leading cause of lung diseases and male smokers outnumber women across the world. You can figure out the math here!
Fitness mantras during pregnancyYou must be wondering how Shilpa Shetty maintained her fitness even after bearing a child. The simple answer is that she never gave up exercising. Exercising during and after pregnancy is the best way to stay in shape and ensure your mental and physical healthiness. It also helps you in preparing for labour pain and delivery, and quick recovery postpartum. However, there are some things you need to keep in mind while exercising during pregnancy: Measure your fitness You need to determine how fit you are. This will help in determining the type and duration of exercising during pregnancy and post pregnancy. Also, before you continue your old exercise routine or begin a new one, you should talk to your doctor about exercising while you're pregnant. Pregnancy is a balancing act After the fourth month of pregnancy, it's likely you will lose balance while you exercise. Though your baby is well protected with amniotic sac, it is better to be safe than sorry. Safe exercises Activities such as swimming, walking, yoga, pilates, and low-impact aerobics are good choices. Pregnancy is not the right time to start any new intensive exercise, but it is safe to continue with most types of exercise if you're used to them. The things you should avoid Avoid exercises where you are likely to lose your balance or could make you fall or slip. Vigorous or extreme activities such as horse riding, skiing, mountain climbing are out of the question. They carry too high a risk of injury to your tummy. Avoid exercises such as: Sit-ups Standing on one leg Separating your legs widely You should also avoid most contact sports, such as football, basketball and so on. Finally, give racket sports a miss if you're not a regular player as they can be tough on your knees and ankles. Check with your doctor Consult the doctor before starting with any new or unusual exercise. Check for any complications or unusual conditions. Also, discuss for any concern such as: Pregnancy-induced high blood pressure Early contractions Vaginal bleeding Premature rupture of your membranes, also known as waters (the fluid in the amniotic sac around the fetus) breaking early The best outfit for exercise Clothes should be comfortable and loose fitting while exercising. Wear a supportive bra which protects the breasts and is also relaxing. If your shoe size has changed because of mild swelling, you may want to buy a new one. Duration of the exercise Exercising three to four times a week is necessary. This reduces stress, fights fatigue, and stabilizes emotions in early pregnancy. Start gradually, may be with only five minutes a day, if you were totally inactive before. Add five minutes each day till you reach 30 minutes. Also keep in mind to avoid exercise on an empty stomach. Eat a snack 30 minutes before exercise. Never over do Listen to your body when it says 'stop'. Over exercising causes overheating. Raising your core temperature too much can affect the baby adversely. Always sip water before, during and after exercising. Listening to your body when something hurts or doesn't feel right - that means stop. Drink a lot of water Try to drink about two glasses of water two hours before you begin exercising. Take a sports bottle of water with you when you exercise and take frequent sips from it. It's important you don't get dehydrated. This may raise your body temperature, which may not be good for you or your baby.  Keeping these points in mind, exercise to stay healthy and fit. We hope you soon give birth to a healthy kid.  
Making babies, the best way!Some couples get pregnant easily. But many couples have to wait months before the baby is conceived. There are several factors that affect conception right from fertility to the position during intercourse. Some believe that positions have nothing to do with conceiving a child. This is not true. Some positions are ideal to help the sperm meet the ovum. Let's see what some of these positions are. Missionary position:The best position for getting pregnant fast is the missionary position.Here the man is lying on top of the woman allowing for the deepest possible penetration, making it possible for the sperm to get deposited closest to the cervix. It is also the most common and comfortable position preferred by couples. Raise your hips high: Your hips have a lot to do in helping you get pregnant. Raise your hips high during sex by placing a pillow below you. This helps to expose the female cervix to as much semen as the male can release. Doggy position: Considered to be the most erotic and pleasurable position,this rear-entry position where the man enters the woman from behind is also recommended for increasing the chances of getting pregnant. In this position too, the sperm is deposited closest to the cervix, thereby increasing the chances of conception. Side-by-side: You can also try having intercourse while lying side by side. This position, likewise, causes the most exposure of the cervix to the male sperm. While these positions certainly improve your chances of getting pregnant, there is no guarantee that you will conceive. The most important thing is to enjoy this special time and have fun with your partner. So keep enjoying and keep trying!
Anger management for your teenaged daughter - Handling difficult teenage times If one fine day you find your daughter suddenly reacting differently to a particular situation, do not be surprised, especially if she is in her teens. The outburst is beyond her control and she herself is confused by her own behavior, at times. It's important rather than scolding her for her misbehavior, one must wait for her to calm down and then speak to her regarding the incident when she is in a jolly mood. It is impossible to forgive such behavior if it repeats regularly, though. Here are some ways to deal with your daughter if she strays the limits of accepted norm for a behavior. You can seek the help of a counselor and understand why this is happening and solve her queries so that she could handle them better in the future. Why do Teenage Girls Lose Temper?By the time, the girls enter their teens they would have become aware about the social etiquettes, importance of looks, acting in an acceptable manner in social scenarios and creating a 'cool' image about themselves when they are outside their homes. So, even if they are hurt, or are angry at something, they do not let it go public, lest their 'cool' image gets shattered. However, the same anger becomes bottled up and vents itself out when they reach home. It's much like the workplace anger showing up at home. This is the place where they can behave wildly and still expect forgiveness. However, that does not mean that you should let your daughter get away with such kind of madness. After she has cooled down, you need to talk to her to find out what is bothering her or making her behave in such a manner. Probably, she may not accept that she has a problem, but you will have to find a way to reach to the root of the issue. More often girls want to be like someone in their college or peer group. They want to fit into a particular group and being unable to do so makes them nervous and distraught. Teach your daughter to believe in herself. Make her understand that she is a unique person on her own and do not need to convert herself into someone else. It may take consistent effort on your part to imbibe all these things into her mind, but you have to work hard to make her understand. Self-Control is the KeyMany young girls do not know how to solve a particular problem when they are faced with it. Apart from taking her to a good counselor, you can discuss problem solving techniques with her. Ask her to understand the situation first, put a foot backwards, relax, and then find a solution to the problem. This habit will make her probe into the problem in a better way and she will be able to handle similar situations when they occur again. You can ask her to write down the problems that are bothering her and ponder over them. You can assist her initially, but as she matures she will find her own solutions depending on her past experiences. Adolescent girls have sometimes trouble keeping their anger, rage, and fear under control and hence their problems should be handled patiently. Brainstorming SolutionsOnce she has ripped apart every aspect of the problem and has come to a brainstorming solution, advise her to write down the plan of action. For example, if she is disturbed due to a particular teacher who does not seem to like her grades, she may do well seeking help through friends who are better in that subject, or for that matter, a bad remark by someone in a group might unsettle her, thereby venting her anger at home. With restraint on your part, make her understand that anger will only block her process to think or find a solution. If you teach her to find answers for the problems in a calm manner, your teenage daughter will surely learn to control her anger and behave normally as she grows into an adult.
Not very chummy! Menophobia - The fear of periodsMenstruation or periods begin as female reaches puberty. This is the time when there are hormonal changes which occur in the body as nature takes the girl and makes her ready for womanhood. The onset of periods can be distressful with lots of mood swings accompanied by abdominal cramps, bloated feet as the menstrual blood flows. This is also a time when the girl needs to be comforted and educated the most, as it can be truly a terrifying experience. Normally mothers or elder women in the family ensure that they take complete care of the girl in this transition phase. For some women, their initial experience with periods may not have been particularly pleasant, causing them to actually dread those 4 days and this fear can then take the shape of a full blown phobia -Menophobia! The reason could vary. For some the pain factor could be the reason for menophobia, while for others, it could be the memory of embarrassing red stains on the clothes which could set it off. In menophobia, just before the onset of the periods, the person starts getting anticipatory anxiety and the pain which could be normal period pain, is then imagined to be ten times worse. This brings on panic attacks and feeling of utter dread which while is entirely psychological can be utterly distressful and downright crippling. Counseling can help greatly along with pain medication to manage the pain and the fear of this natural phenomenon called periods. In therapy, this is what is iterated. That menstruation is a completely natural process and if there is a fear of menstrual blood then gradually, the woman is encouraged to accept it as a natural body function which plays a major part of her being a woman.
Lost in wonderland? - Absentmindedness!The Daily Telegraph reports that on an average every adult in UK forgets three things per day. Forgetfulness is a human tendency. If this absentmindedness or forgetfulness is limited to forgetting three to five things per day, then it can be left unattended. However, if you or a near one is facing a lot of trouble in your daily life due to this habit or problem, you should immediately have a consultation with your doctor. Mystery behind Absentmindedness According to Maria Jonsdottir, an investigating neuropsychologist from Iceland, absentmindedness is the mental lapses that usually happen in connection with the actions that are routine or well-rehearsed. You can perform these actions without any need to be careful. This includes regular actions such as squeezing out toothpaste or moisturizer from the tube. These action slips are very common and if you observe carefully, you do forget some such regular things every day unknowingly. Psychologists believe that an individual makes such mental lapses around 30 times in every week. On an average, the nervous system of a human brain runs quite efficiently. However, sometimes temporary fault may develop that may make you use incorrect word or slip to your native tongue while conversing. This does not mean however, that something is wrong with your brain. When the team of Jonsdottir surveyed around 200 people, they found out that on an average the slips are 6.4 per week although the number also greatly depends upon the gender, intelligence level, and age. One startling fact that was discovered is that most of the events of forgetfulness occurred before 8 p.m. that means people tend to forget more during the daytime than in the evening. Apart from a momentary lapse in the functioning of brain efficiency, other reasons that can lead to increase in the incidents of forgetfulness are high stress levels, mobile phones, e-mails, and busy lifestyles. Today, people are pressed for time and they have more work at hand than time and that has increased the occurrence of forgetfulness. Types of Absentmindedness A team of neuropsychologists has divided these mental lapses into five categories. The most common are the storage failures in which people cannot recall what they had planned for a particular occasion or they can recall the action, but cannot remember for whom it was meant. Another category is test failures in which people come back home to check whether they have turned the light off and find out that they have already done so. Discrimination failure is another category of absentmindedness wherein you for a moment fail to identify the difference between your things and others'. During the study, a male participant accepted that he picked up the jacket of his female partner thinking it to be his own. Sometimes you put books in the dustbin and the trash on the shelf and laugh at your behavior a moment later when you find out what you have done. This is discrimination failure. Another mix-up includes program assembly failure wherein you put salt in the tea instead of sugar or you just do not keep the right things at the right place. The fifth one is the sub-routine failure wherein you go to the market to buy tea and instead come back home with coffee. The research proves one thing that if you are absentminded, it does not mean that you have a bad memory or can suffer from dementia as is widely publicized in the media. It is perfectly all right to forget or being an absentminded person. Sometimes the incidences of absentmindedness can increase due to fatigue. A good sleep and rest can fix the problem easily.
High fiber foods and their benefitsFiber has many health benefits and that is why it is important to include fiber in your diet. However, if you are not used to fiber in your diet then introduce it slowly or it could cause indigestion and gas. Fibers are good for overall health and help to boost the immune system and help prevent a number of diseases. The digestive health benefits of fiber : If bowel movements are regular, then fibers will prevent both constipation and diarrhea. Regular movements flush out excessive cholesterol as well as harmful toxins from the intestines which could also be carcinogenic. Fiber helps to reduce inflammation of the intestines, could bring relief from irritable bowel syndrome and prevent piles, ulcers, and acidity. The benefits to the heart Soluble fiber is good for the heart. Fiber reduces the bad cholesterol levels (LDL). It helps to lower blood pressure, improves the levels of good cholesterol (HDL). Fibers reduce the risk of stroke also. These factors are good for heart heath. Weight Loss Fiber can help you to lose weight as it makes you feel fuller for longer which means you will eat less. High-fiber fruits and vegetables have lower calories, so by adding these to your diet cuts calories which could aid in weight loss. Eat 21 to 38 grams of fiber per day depending on your age and gender. Diabetes If you already suffer from type II diabetes then you should have soluble fiber as it slows down the absorption of sugar and can help to maintain blood sugar levels. Regulating blood sugar can also reduce the risk of kidney and gallbladder stones. Cancer prevention Though research is still ongoing, but the general conclusion is that eating fiber foods keeps the colon in a better condition and this could prevent colon cancer. However, it does prevent digestive tract cancer. The more fiber you eat the more fluids you should drink as that helps to absorb fiber better. Good for the skin Eating fiber is good for the skin as they help to flush out toxins from your body which otherwise cause acne. Besides eating a lot of fruits and vegetables produce antioxidants that are good for your skin. Some tips Start your day with fiber as it keeps you full and sugar levels just right to keep you energetic. Try to replace white rice, bread, and pasta with brown rice and whole grain products. Eat seeds, nuts, and flaxseeds either whole or ground and sprinkle some on fruit, yoghurt, or cereal. Add beans and legumes to your diet as often as possible. Eat whole fruits instead of juice. Insoluble fiber can be found in foods like whole grains, wheat, cereals, and vegetables such as carrots, celery, and tomatoes. Whereas soluble fibers are found in barley, oatmeal, beans, nuts, and fruits such as apples, berries, citrus fruits, and pears. Foods like meat, dairy, and sugar have no fiber and some foods like white rice, white bread, and pastries have no fiber either because it has got removed because of refining.
MigraineA Severely painful persistent headache can put anyone in distress. Migraine symptoms vary from person to person. Some people get intimation before the pain begins. It can be sparkling flashes of light, blind spots, or distortions. Some others experience tingling or "pins-and-needles" sensation in hands or face. This is called an aura. The headache begins within 30 minutes of seeing an aura and may last for 4 to 72 hours. Extreme sensitivity to light, noise, smells, nausea and vomiting, loss of appetite and fatigue, numbness, tingling, or weakness are all-common in migraine. There is no permanent solution to migraines. People suffer for years together and keep on taking painkillers for a long time. Pain killer helps only if taken right at the beginning of the headache. Keep a watch on things that trigger the migraine and try to avoid them. Make some lifestyle changes that can help prevent migraines to some extent. Taking good sleep. Lack of sleep can cause migraine. Appropriate hours of sleep as a routine will help to prevent the attacks. Regular meals at fixed time help to prevent migraines in people who get headaches due to hunger or not eating on time. Regular exercises help to rejuvenate the body and prevent migraines along with many other diseases. Stress is another important cause for migraines. Avoid stress. Learning to manage it will keep migraine at bay. Caffeine triggers migraine in many. Avoid caffeine. Reduce it if quitting is not possible. Limiting alcohol will again be very beneficial as alcohol and hangovers can be the cause. Meditation and relaxation therapies may also help prevent migraine headaches.  
Aids defining cancersIn fact the presence of such aids defining cancers is an indication of advanced AIDS having developed in these patients. However, the reasons for these cancers are unclear. It is possible that since people with AIDS have low immunity, they become more susceptible to these cancers. The double attack of these already complex diseases complicates treatment plans too. Thus, it needs care under experienced doctors who specialize in these diseases. The cancers that define AIDS are: Kaposi's Sarcoma:This is a type of skin cancer. It was usually found usually in people who have received organ transplants. Nowadays it is also most prevalent in homosexual men with HIV/AIDS and is also called epidemic Kaposi's Sarcoma.  It causes lesions to show up in multiple points in the body such as skin, lymph nodes, liver, lungs, spleen and digestive tract. Non-Hodgkin Lymphoma:This is the second most commonly associated cancer with HIV/AIDS. The various sub types of NHL are primary central nervous system lymphoma and primary effusion lymphoma. Approximately 4-10% people with HIV/AIDS develop NHL. Other kinds of cancers are anal cancer, liver cancer, mouth cancer, Hodgkin's lymphoma, testicular cancer, melanoma, throat cancer, colorectal cancer and multiple skin cancers.  Treating Cancer in HIV people: Till anti-HIV medication were not discovered the future for infected people was bleak. They were already sick and their bodies weak even before their cancer treatment were started. Presently the cancer treatment is mixed with anti-HIV drugs. However, depending upon the extent of cancer and the need of AIDS care, variations are made between chemotherapy and other HIV related drugs needed. Treating Kaposi's Sarcoma: Often anti-HIV drugs are enough to treat this cancer. The lesions, which are viral, shrink, as the immune system gets better. Sometimes chemotherapy and radiation may also be needed if the lesions are internal. Treating Non-Hodgkin Lymphoma: AIDS related NHL is fast growing and needs intense chemotherapy treatment. Introduction of highly active anti-retroviral therapy and use of drugs that help the infected body make new blood cells has relieved a major concern for HIV patients where previously due to their low blood cell count, chemotherapy could not be administered to them. But with these advances, acutely monitored chemotherapy treatments can be administered now. Treating Cervical Cancer: In case of women who have a good immune system and invasive cervical cancer can still be treated similarly as non-HIV women. They can even do well in surgeries and other conventional treatments. Discovering Cancer Early: Screening helps discover presence of cancer when no symptoms are evident. However AIDS defining cancers cannot be detected through screening. Thus, close monitoring, regular checkups and a keen lookout for symptoms of these cancers can help discover the ailment if present. Pap tests help discover cervical cancer in women. However, in case of HIV women, these should be undertaken more often. Even as often as 2 tests a year, 6 months apart in the first year of HIV detection. If the tests are clear, they should get Pap tests done regularly once a year henceforth. For other AIDS related cancers, the screening tests are still being devised. Lowering Cancer Risk: HIV ruins the body's immune system making it susceptible to a variety of diseases. Good health practices are a must for those detected with HIV in order to ward off cancer. They should surely not smoke or consume alcohol. Injection drugs and unsafe sexual practices also pose increased threat of cancer. Maintaining balanced diets, physical activity and proper body weight are extremely important and helpful too.
Stress-free sex: Know your safe period!Having sex is a pleasurable thing; and the nicest way to enjoy it, is to give in without being bogged down by the fears of getting pregnant. Not every act of sexual intercourse will result in pregnancy. There are days when your chances of conception are very high, just like there are days when the chances of getting pregnant are almost nil. Identifying these days will help you enjoy a better and a more stressfree sex life! A woman's menstrual cycle starts from the first day of  bleeding and ends about 28 days after that, on an average. Ovulation occurs on the 14 day of the menstrual cycle. The 14th day is the ideal day, theoretically. Since every woman's menstrual cycle differs, the day of the ovulation also differs. Hence doctors calculate the fertile period from the 12th to the 18th day of the menstrual cycle. This is the period when the chances of ovulating and hence getting pregnant, are optimal. The 1st to the 7th day and the 19th day to the start of the next cycle, are the days when the ovulation chances are very low. This means if you make love during these days, there are very little chances of you getting pregnant. This is the case with women who have regular period cycles. In case your cycles are not regular, then you would need to do a bit of math to calculate your safe period. For example, if your shortest cycle is of 26 days and the longest cycle has been of 31 days, then: 26-18= 8 and 31-10=21, which means the 8th to the 21st day of your cycle, are the most fertile days. The 1st to the 7th day and then the 21st day to the start of your next cycle, are the days that are safe for you to enjoy sex, without fear of getting pregnant. Opting to have sex during the 'safe period', isn't always fool-proof though. A lot of women have irregular cycles and the cycle length can vary from woman to woman; which is why the so-called 'safe period', is in truth, not 100% safe. It is always better to use condoms or other contraceptive methods like the oral pill to prevent unwanted pregnancies.
Is sex linked to self esteem?Man is a curious creature, full of quirks and contradictions. Sexual intercourse, something that most people consider an intimate and private experience, is spoken about in hushed tones and often, with some discomfort. We don't reveal or talk about our sexual desires, as readily we discuss our salary packages or food habits. This is quite ironic seeing how sex is an important gauge for a person's self esteem and also an indicator of his/her social desirability. The very thing that we do under covers, we somehow choose to "keep under cover". The Link between Sex and Self Esteem: Self esteem is an important factor that determines the mental & physical well-being of an individual. All of us have a craving to be understood, liked and appreciated; and these form the equivalent of our basic needs on the inverted pyramid- Food, clothing and shelter. For a human being to flourish and prosper, consumable food, without the mental food of appreciation, is not enough; and sexual intercourse or an intimacy with the opposite sex, is one way of validating that need. Sex therefore, ceases to be just a physical need instilled by nature for the perpetuation of the species, but goes into the larger emotional cum psychological dimension of self actualization and realization. Though some of us might be embarrassed to broach the topic of 'whether or not we are getting enough', the truth is that every human seeks to achieve his sexual potential, even while he or she might, not be aware of it. Most of us have the ability to get the foods matching our taste preferences onto our plates, but with sex, this could be a little difficult, since sex, is a complex subject with a lot of social, moral and religious links. The truth is evident in the number of marriages (the very cornerstones of civil society) that fail on the basis of sexual compatibility, either by setting unrealistic sexual expectations or by not owning up to, or even identifying, one's sexual needs. This has repercussions on the psyche and self-esteem of a person, and this is especially true in the case of men in particular, as they may feel completely inferior for not being able to attract a sexual partner matching his desires. In some people, this also leads to a case of self-loathing, for having sexual needs which a partner doesn't understand, or much worse, needs which are considered taboo and sinful (Homosexuality, Anal Sex, Group Sex, Fetishes, etc.) These complex emotions can wreak  havoc on a person's self-esteem, by creating severe internal conflicts and serious self-doubts. Now socially, sex can either liberate a person, or hold him prisoner. At times, the unfulfilled needs may get repressed and banished to the shadows, only to be played out later, in the form of sexual adventurism and crime. Just one look at the sexual crimes in our society today, and we can clearly understand just how healthy our collective self esteem is! The very society that frowns upon prostitution, is actually responsible for creating it, though everybody would like to pretend otherwise. The crux of the matter is that "sex" and "self esteem" are closely related; and one should not shy away from addressing any issues one might face regarding one's sexuality. Physical love is necessary for the survival of a relationship and one needs to make time and efforts to successfully create one's own sexual space. The positive effects of a good sex life can be seen in an increased work productivity, fewer illnesses and an increase in one's overall efficiency. Some people are haunted by sexual guilt and confusion and when they keep it all locked up, they suffer from unexplained physical pains and feel 'down in the dumps' mentally. Another problem with appreciation from the opposite sex, is the addiction to  external validation. Some people feel utterly worthless until they receive positive feedback about their looks or abilities on a regular basis. This can be downright devastating, as in these cases, there is a great dependence on external factors for one to feel good. While no one denies the "feel good factor" of sexual appreciation, it is up to each one of us, to decide just how much of control one must be giving to external factors, to determine our personal self-esteem. The appreciation may be theirs, but the esteem is entirely of the self and only the self can decide how much of appreciation and sex is enough.
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