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  MEN`S HEALTH MORE
Tips for men wanting flat abs
The best gifts a dad can give his children
Strict parenting: When enough is enoughThe strict or authoritative style of parenting is where the parents hold their children's lives over a tight leash. Strict parents are high in control and low in nurturing qualities. They set high standards for all activities and expect strict obedience to the rules set by them. However, these parents display little or no warmth and affection. They love and affection they offer is also conditional love based on obedience and performance. Children of authoritarian parents turn out to be obedient, but this obedience is based on fear. Such parents very often use shame and guilt to make their children change their behaviour. They don't encourage verbal give-and-take and expect their orders to be obeyed without question. The children brought up in such a way are initially very obedient and polite but later all the suppressed emotions find an outlet. More often than not, such children end up being aggressive and tend to be bullies at school. Research shows that fathers who are extremely strict with their sons end up making their sons violent and aggressive, or indulge in non-physical aggressiveness like name calling. Strictly raised children have difficulty relating to their peer group. They either end up being aggressive or completely timid and submissive. At school teachers rate them as less socially competent, average or poor at studies and extra-curricular activities. They are also less accepted by their friends. The school dropout rates in such children are very high. Studies conducted on such dropouts revealed that they suffered from a huge inferiority complex and low self-esteem. Strict parenting can cause several problems in adolescence too. Children who are dominated by their parents are often found breaking the law. Alcohol and drug abuse rates are high in such children. Psychologically, these children are usually poor decision makers. Having had their parents make decisions for them all their lives, they find it very difficult to take a stand. They end up being indecisive. At the workplace too, they lack the competency to take up initiatives or show the lead. They make better team members than team leaders. Even if presented with an opportunity, they are likely to shy away from responsibility as they feel inferior and lack the requisite courage. Strict parenting can have a negative impact on the child's weight too. Studies show that an overly strict upbringing has a negative impact on weight because the children often fail to learn to eat on the basis of hunger and satiety. In such families parents use food as a reward, insist that children clean their plates, or restrict the kind or amount of food a child can eat. The studies showed that the children of authoritarian mothers were nearly five times as likely to be overweight compared to their counterparts!
Prostate cancer- Things you must knowSymptoms include: Frequent urination, especially at night. Difficulty in starting and stopping urination. Weak and interrupted urine stream. Pain or burning at urination and ejaculation. Blood in urine or semen. Growing older is the greatest risk factor. Risk increases after age of 50 and in men with family history (father or brother with prostate cancer). Prostate hypertrophy, too much sex, or masturbation does not increase risk of prostate cancer. Digital rectal exam (DRE) helps to detect cancer early and Prostate-specific antigen (PSA) is a test to diagnose its extent. These should be included in routine examination after 50. Treatment options include radiation therapy, surgery, hormone therapy, and chemotherapy. Erectile dysfunction is common side effect of the treatment. It usually improves within two years. Good news about prostate cancer is that it usually grows slowly and 9 out of 10 cases are detected early and have good survival rate. Prostate cancer survivors who exercised regularly had lower risk of dying.  
  WOMEN`S HEALTH MORE
Excellent exercise options during pregnancy
5 health hazards in women
Fitness mantras during pregnancyYou must be wondering how Shilpa Shetty maintained her fitness even after bearing a child. The simple answer is that she never gave up exercising. Exercising during and after pregnancy is the best way to stay in shape and ensure your mental and physical healthiness. It also helps you in preparing for labour pain and delivery, and quick recovery postpartum. However, there are some things you need to keep in mind while exercising during pregnancy: Measure your fitness You need to determine how fit you are. This will help in determining the type and duration of exercising during pregnancy and post pregnancy. Also, before you continue your old exercise routine or begin a new one, you should talk to your doctor about exercising while you're pregnant. Pregnancy is a balancing act After the fourth month of pregnancy, it's likely you will lose balance while you exercise. Though your baby is well protected with amniotic sac, it is better to be safe than sorry. Safe exercises Activities such as swimming, walking, yoga, pilates, and low-impact aerobics are good choices. Pregnancy is not the right time to start any new intensive exercise, but it is safe to continue with most types of exercise if you're used to them. The things you should avoid Avoid exercises where you are likely to lose your balance or could make you fall or slip. Vigorous or extreme activities such as horse riding, skiing, mountain climbing are out of the question. They carry too high a risk of injury to your tummy. Avoid exercises such as: Sit-ups Standing on one leg Separating your legs widely You should also avoid most contact sports, such as football, basketball and so on. Finally, give racket sports a miss if you're not a regular player as they can be tough on your knees and ankles. Check with your doctor Consult the doctor before starting with any new or unusual exercise. Check for any complications or unusual conditions. Also, discuss for any concern such as: Pregnancy-induced high blood pressure Early contractions Vaginal bleeding Premature rupture of your membranes, also known as waters (the fluid in the amniotic sac around the fetus) breaking early The best outfit for exercise Clothes should be comfortable and loose fitting while exercising. Wear a supportive bra which protects the breasts and is also relaxing. If your shoe size has changed because of mild swelling, you may want to buy a new one. Duration of the exercise Exercising three to four times a week is necessary. This reduces stress, fights fatigue, and stabilizes emotions in early pregnancy. Start gradually, may be with only five minutes a day, if you were totally inactive before. Add five minutes each day till you reach 30 minutes. Also keep in mind to avoid exercise on an empty stomach. Eat a snack 30 minutes before exercise. Never over do Listen to your body when it says 'stop'. Over exercising causes overheating. Raising your core temperature too much can affect the baby adversely. Always sip water before, during and after exercising. Listening to your body when something hurts or doesn't feel right - that means stop. Drink a lot of water Try to drink about two glasses of water two hours before you begin exercising. Take a sports bottle of water with you when you exercise and take frequent sips from it. It's important you don't get dehydrated. This may raise your body temperature, which may not be good for you or your baby.  Keeping these points in mind, exercise to stay healthy and fit. We hope you soon give birth to a healthy kid.  
10 pregnancy risk factors that every pregnant woman should be aware ofFollowing are the possible risk factors for pregnant women: Hypertension: Blood pressure rises during pregnancy due to changes in osmotic level. Persistent high blood pressure leads to a condition called as pre-eclampsia. It retards the growth of the baby in the womb and can even result into death of foetus. It can lead to convulsions in mother. Exposure to medicines and drugs: Self medication is a strict NO NO during pregnancy. Certain drugs have harmful effect on the growth and development of baby. Take gynaecologist's opinion and ask a doctor before taking any medication.  Smoking: Smoking retards the growth of foetus (baby in womb). Moms who indulge in smoking give birth to babies with a very low birth weight. It also increases chances of miscarriage. Mother's weight: It is important to make sure that there is a steady weight gain during pregnancy. A weight gain of 11 kilograms is expected over a period of 9 months. Watch for a steady weight gain for a healthy pregnancy sake. Anaemia: There is an increase in blood volume during pregnancy. This can cause the iron levels to drop down resulting in anaemia. Haemorrhoids add further to the iron loss. Iron and folic acid are therefore prescribed. Haemorrhoids: Haemorrhoids are common during pregnancy and after pregnancy due to constipation which is because of hormone induced reduced motility of intestine. The pressure of gravid uterus on intestine may also cause it. Increased consumption of green leafy vegetables and laxative would relieve it. Alcohol: Drinking can cause a harmful effect on the growth and nourishment of child. Child may be born with a serious medical problem. Sexual intercourse: It's strictly not advised during last trimester. Radiation exposure: Exposure to radiotherapy or chemicals in the surrounding should be avoided. Bleeding per vagina: Consult your gynaecologist soon, if you have problem of bleeding per vagina. It could be a sign of abortion.  
  KIDS CARE MORE
Tips to maintain good personal hygiene in children
Child care - Watch out for these signs and symptoms
Tips and tricks to deal with my toddler's tantrumsWhen your child is having a tantrum, it may usually be for something that it wants and cannot have. Throwing a tantrum is a child's way of getting what it wants. Conversely, giving in to the child's demands may be the easy way out for the parents too. But always remember that giving in is not right. The child may get habituated to this and it may prove quite a nuisance to you too. Learn to say no, gently but firmly. Giving an acceptable reason for your 'no' and also an option at the same time works wonders. All said and done, children are not that easy to handle. If your child doesn't fall in line and is adamant, let it pass the phase. Screaming out the rage, throwing away things may help the child. When the anger subsides, looking at the destruction and the obvious uselessness of it may help the child realize his efforts were futile. But be careful that the child doesn't get physically hurt in this process. For some kids, a gentle hug helps soothe the anger pent up. Tantrums in public places can be extremely embarrassing. In such situations, do not argue or scold your child or order him to hush up. It will only end up making the child more adamant. Wait till the storm subsides. Take him out to a quieter place and talk gently but firmly. One thing to remember here is to never let the child know of your embarrassment and concern that you are in a public place. Children are very smart and may end up using this to work things in their favour. It is not easy being a toddler and it is definitely not easy being a toddler's parent either. By the time your toddler is old enough to go school he will have overcome this stage.  
Bow legsCauses: Physiological - As mentioned before, bow legs are normal below 18 months of age. Thereafter as the child continues to grow the bowing begins to improve slowly. By the age of 3 to 4 the deformity usually gets corrected. Blount’s disease - This disease results in bowing of legs due to abnormality of the growth plate of the upper part of shinbone known as tibia. Growth plates are the growing end of the bones. It is diagnosed after the child is 3 to 4 years old. Rickets - Rickets is a group of diseases that occurs due to deficiency of vitamin D. Rickets is characterized by bow legs and other bony deformities. Most commonly rickets occurs in children due to deficient intake of vitamin D. Signs and symptoms: The bony deformity becomes visible when the affected child walks or stands. The uncommon walking pattern of the child is the commonest symptom. Bow legs usually do not cause any pain. However, persistent and severe bow legs cause discomfort to other bony structures like spine and hip. Test and diagnosis: The doctor at first asks questions to the parents regarding the development of the child. This is followed by physical examination of the child. Physical examination often suggests bow legs. If the doctor suspects an underlying disease, necessary laboratory tests are done. The doctor always asks for an x-ray of the affected legs to evaluate the severity and extent of bowing. Treatment: If the bow legs persist after 3 to 4 years or an underlying disease is detected, treatment is undertaken. Medical and non-surgical treatment- In cases of physiological bow legs, no treatment is required. The parents are reassured by the doctor and spontaneous resolution takes place by the age of 2 years. Continuous followup is advised for borderline cases. Children with Blount’s disease need treatment with a brace. Children with rickets need medical management by a specialist doctor. Additionally, they need advice and regular followup by an Orthopedic surgeon. Surgical treatment  - If the bony defects persist in children with bow legs even after medical and nonsurgical treatment, surgery is required to correct the bowing. Two types of surgery is advocated to correct bony deformity of the legs. Guided growth:  Growth of the healthy part of the growth plate is stopped and that of the abnormal part is promoted. This allows straightening of the legs. Tibial osteotomy: The shinbone (tibia) is cut and reshaped to correct the deformity. Then bone is fixed with screws and plate. In both surgeries a cast is applied to promote healing of the bone. Crutches may be required for a few weeks to prevent weight bearing on the limb. Later, physical therapies are advised for complete recovery of range of movements and regular activities. Prevention The parents need to be vigilant about appearance of any bony deformity in legs of their child. The child must be given adequate amount of vitamin D in diet or vitamin D supplementation to prevent development of rickets.
  MENTAL HEALTH MORE
Tips to handle success gracefully
A meditation journal
Accepting your flawsThere are basically two kinds of 'flaws,' one that is physical and the other that is in your personality. A physical 'flaw' like being too short, fat, or darkis never a person's fault. Thus accepting what you are can only boost your self-esteem and confidence. Despite these 'shortcomings,' it is your character and your achievements that stand out in the long run and not the way you look. The first step in creating a better life is accepting if you are wrong! Personality traits and habits are mostly visible to others but not to you. These are those faults that can cause bitterness in relationships or cause problems at work or in our social interactions. Some people lose their temper easily, some are lazy, and some are rude, while some are either introverts or extroverts. If you have flaws that can cause problems for others then the best thing you can do is to change those negative traits in yourself. Character flaws might be natural, but they can affect others negatively. The first thing in making improvements is to analyze yourself. What are you so angry about ? Is it really some other person's fault or that you have had a bad day at the office? Give it a thought and once you find the answers, you will feel relieved. Accept your physical flaws and love yourself for what you are, as this is the key to lasting happiness. Major flaws like alcoholism, splurging money, borrowing money, or addictions are what one should be willing to overcome. If you accept you have any of these major flaws and need help to overcome them, then you need to seek help. There are professionals who can help out, provided you are a willing party to the process. Improvement will come only if you are willing to change. Remember that flaws are easy to acknowledge and to change;the only thing required is the desire within you to do so.
Building self confidence by improving body languageSo what have they told you? That only physically attractive people have the right to self-confidence? That you either have it in you or you don't? Let's face it, confidence is the key to anything and everything. Right from driving a car to handling work to dating, confidence is what separates the proverbial wheat from the chaff. What you need to remember is that the mind speaks the body language. Conversely if you change your body language, then it has an impact on the mind as well. Mr.Hunched Over This guy is the classic example of a person who just doesn't like himself. The world is a mighty dangerous place for him. Just look at the way he walks. Shoulders all hunched over, head down as he shuffles rather than walk. Mr. Hunched Over generally finds it difficult to look people in the eye as he speaks and he last is handshake is as limp as his mind. He crosses his arms tightly, touches his nose all the time to see if it has grown since he lied through it. Mr. Walk the Walk and Talk the Talk This chap is diametrically the opposite of the first kind. He exudes an air of confidence in his walk, manner and speech. He has a confident stride which is helped by the fact that he stands to his height with his head held high, chin tucked in and shoulders squared back. This is what gives him the confidence as this posture is designed for efficiency. Mind you, he isn't ram rod straight, just straight enough so that his ears are in line with his shoulders and hips. The chest is also out since the shoulders are drawn back towards the hip. This facilitates deep, even and diaphragmatic breathing which prevents anxiety. His hand shake is firm. As he offers his hand, he exerts just the right pressure on the other person's hand to indicate a strong grip. This is no wrestling bout, so the confident man always exerts just the right kind of pressure in a hand shake.  He maintains eye contact with the person he is talking to; not a staring about, but normal eye contact, one which won't make the other person conscious of being stared at. He looks away from time to time to give his eyeballs a rest. This is why he comes across as genuine and not shift eyed and restless. To be Mr.-Or- Ms. Walk the Walk Always square your shoulders and keep your head held high when you walk. You might seem imperious or high handed at first, but then it will work wonders on your self-esteem and you will begin to feel differently about yourself. You needn't even be a tall person to come across as cool and confident-just stand up to your own height and see the miracle. Breathe slowly steadily and deeply. Use your abdominal muscles to draw in your breath rather than engaging your neck muscles which end up making you a shallow breather and plus you also tend to hunch easily if you don't feel your rib cage and stomach expand as you breathe in. Practice standing and speaking in front of the mirror. It will show you exactly how you appear to others. Practice your walk in front of a video camera and keep a record of your metamorphosis.
  BEAUTY AND FITNESS MORE
Summer woes - Skin troubles and remedies
Bread- Stuffed with myths
Muscle build up dietYou may think that you need fatty foods to bulk up, but this is not true. Fatty foods will do just that make you fat. Lean meats, fruits and vegetables will actually build muscle. Take a balanced diet of vegetables and lean meats to achieve your muscle building goals. Changing your diet to build muscle will help with your overall health. Eating food that helps build muscle will ensure that you are not wasting all that hard work you are doing in the gym. Workout utilizes considerable energy. Food is the only way to replace this energy. So what happens if you fail to eat the right type of food to build muscle mass? It will take longer to build muscle, and it may even prevent muscle building altogether once you reach a certain point. Is protein important or not? You bet it is. Protein provides the building blocks to build that muscle. What types of protein are best? Chicken, eggs, steak (with the fat cut off), fish, cheese (especially cottage cheese), and nuts are all great sources of protein. Finding out how much protein to eat when you are interested in building muscle fast is actually not difficult. First, you will need to find out your lean body mass weight in kilos, and then you simply multiply that figure by 2.75 to determine your daily protein requirement. Calculating your lean body mass uses some complex formulae, so ask a professional at the gym if you do not already have this figure. Carbohydrates, in moderation, are also essential when finding foods that build muscle. Do not eat too much, though, unless you choose high fibre carbohydrates, and then you can indulge in much larger amounts. High fibre carbs include rice, potatoes, oatmeal and bananas. Reducing fat in your diet is of course necessary to build bigger muscle on a body that appears lean and has a low body fat ratio. If you are focusing on what foods build muscle mass, you also need to bear in mind that it pays to reduce fat as well. Although proteins are essential, it is really important to select proteins that are low in fat, or that you can cut the fat off. So eat your chicken without the skin, and go for lean steaks rather than more fatty cuts of meat. Opting for cottage cheese or other reduced fat cheeses, and low fat milk also helps reduce your fat intake. You may argue that drinking has no effect on what to eat to build muscle. But you would be wrong. Hydration is critical to general health and wellbeing. Two litres of water a day is what most experts recommend for maintaining optimal health. To drink that amount, you need to drink up to 12 glasses of water a day, which is quite a lot. So start early in the day, and space your water consumption out throughout the day. Foods that build muscle are great and an essential component of your bodybuilding program. But do not be lulled into a false sense of security and think you can slow down on your workouts. Both bodybuilding exercises and bodybuilding diets are required to get a body to die for as quickly as you possibly can. Even if you are working on improving your physique slowly, you should combine a bodybuilding diet with bodybuilding workouts for best results. Sample Diet: 7:00am: Breakfast: 4 eggs + toast or oatmeal + milk with protein powder mixed in (a lot). 9:30am: Snack: 1 Meal replacement supplement + milk. 12:00: Lunch: Tuna sandwich (1 whole can) + green apple. 3:00pm: Snack:  2 Meal replacement supplement + milk. 5:30pm: Workout: Have water (or carb drink if you want), within 30 mins of end of workout (on workout days only) Meal replacement supplement + milk. (If you are going to have Creatine - put it in this Meal replacement supplement at the end of your workout). 8:30pm: Dinner: A chicken breast (aprox 8 oz + some rice or other starch carb + if you want also eat some veggies) Before Bed:  Meal replacement supplement + milk.
4 super foods to keep you healthy this winterWinter is here. It is time for lazy mornings and blanket hideouts. It is also the time when the markets are lined up with a variety of fresh fruits and vegetables, all juicy, healthy and colorful. Discover four such super foods for the cold winter evenings. Citrus fruits: Oranges, sweet lime, lemons; bring them all and have them all. Bright yellow or orange, they are like the bright sunny mornings which you need after a cold night. Rich in vitamin C, antioxidants, flavonoids and several other nutrients, citrus fruits are the perfect measure for your daily dose. Peel it off and chew it up, or slice it off and lick it on, or squeeze it strong and drink it down - choose the way you like. Citrus fruits help in taking care of your cholesterol, as well. Potatoes: Potatoes are the victims of most diet plans. It is loaded with carbohydrates, we should not eat potato, and so on and so forth. Potato is not that bad actually. In fact, its nutritional value may come as a surprise to many. The content of vitamins B6, C and folate is high in potatoes. Potatoes are rich in essential minerals like potassium, zinc and magnesium. The starch content may be significant, but so is the fiber content. They are known to protect against colon cancer. What are you waiting for? Have some potatoes, will you? Make sure there is no guilt. Kidney Beans: Kidney bean is our favorite Indian 'Rajma'. They are a rich source of carbohydrates and proteins, are known to lower the cholesterol levels and reduce the risk of heart disease. They are particularly known for helping to replenish the iron stores of your body. It can be the food of choice even if you have diabetes, as it is almost fat-free and doesn't send a sudden rush of glucose in the blood. When combined with rice, kidney beans make a very healthy meal. So, is it rajma-chawal (kidney beans with rice) for dinner today? Green leaves: Yes, yes, you are bored of reading and listening to the benefits of green leafy vegetables. But, we have to remind you, for the advantages are too many to be ignored. They are the greenest, freshest and leafiest in the winters. Even if you are not a fan, you will feel like picking up a bunch from the grocery store. Spinach (palak), fenugreek (methi), cabbage (gobhi) are the ones that we can commonly find. Others to look for are lettuce, mustard greens, etc. The green leaves are a rich source of a variety of vitamins, mineral, fiber and water content. They are suitable for all ages and can be easily digested. Entertain that potato lying in your kitchen, cook up a dish with the green leafy ones. Alternatively, you could try it in the form of salads, soups, juices, flour fillings, and any other creative ideas that you chefs have.  
  LIFESTYLE PROBLEMS MORE
All about cholesterol
Living with dermatitis
Diabetes paves the way to cancer!Diabetes mellitus is common across the world. So common, that people don't take it seriously. It appears relatively benign on a day-to-day basis. It is just a sugar level that you notice on the outward. Controlling diabetes means a change in the lifestyle. It is easy to pop in some pills to battle a disease. The difficulty lies in making long-term changes in our daily routine. We tend to get lazy and make excuses for not being able to follow a discipline in lifestyle. This happens more so with diabetes because we do not see an apparent damage that is being done by the high blood sugar. Unless the levels go really high or drop very low, there are no major symptoms that affect our activities from morning to evening. What we are unaware of is that the disease is making some serious damage insidiously. It affects multiple organs and processes. These effects cannot be directly noticed but are continuously ongoing. By the time we wake up, a lot of injury has already occurred. Here is some more bad news. A large number of scientists in all countries are working day and night to study the course of diabetes and bring new facts to light.  Recent researches have established a new link - cancer. Yes, diabetes increases the risk for breast cancer and colon (intestinal) cancer. A woman who has diabetes, is at 20 times more risk for developing breast cancer. Breast cancer A peculiar association of diabetes and breast cancer has come in the picture in the last few years. Factors contributing to these are many - sedentary lifestyle, overweight, rich food, etc. Another important contributor is hormonal imbalance due to diabetes. As a result of high sugar and high insulin in the body, twofold changes occur in the hormonal cycles which ultimately lead to excess estrogen circulation in blood. This, in turn, may act as a trigger for breast cancer. Breast cancer is relatively easy to diagnose. When detected in early stages, treatment has shown remarkable affects. Colon cancer Cancer of the intestine is one of the most common cancers worldwide. Scientists are still working on finding the exact cause but a clear relationship between diabetes and colon cancer has been proven. Patients suffering from high blood sugar have a higher risk of developing intestinal cancer than those with normal blood sugar. Colon cancer is often seen to be fatal and rate of recurrence is quite high. Worldwide several researches have shown a strong connection between diabetes mellitus and occurrence of breast and colon cancer. Suggestions If you have normal blood sugar levels, please put in your best effort to maintain the same. If you are at risk for diabetes because of significant medical history, take extra care and precaution to prevent or delay the onset of the disease. This can be done by regular and adequate exercise, along with the balanced food options. If you have been diagnosed with diabetes, work on your lifestyle to keep the sugar levels in control. Regular check-ups and frequent monitoring of blood sugar levels are a must. If you are a diabetic, please go for periodical screening of related health conditions. Specific to the topic at hand, please get regular breast examinations. Physician recommended and supervised mammograms and colonoscopies would be extremely helpful. Eyes wide open? Now, will you pay attention to all the restrictions advised by your doctor? Please do. Get that lifestyle which is recommended. Compromise on your work and cravings; focus on exercise and eating healthy. Diabetes is not a killer if managed effectively. Don't let cancer get a hold on you.
Malaria - A briefCauses Malaria is caused by a parasite that is passed from one human to another by the bite of infected mosquitoes- called Anopheles. It can transfer to a child from the mother during pregnancy. Symptoms First symptoms usually occur within 10 days to 4 weeks after infection, but can appear as early as 8 days or as long as a year after infection in cycles of 48 to 72 hours. FEVER: Rise in temperature, chills or shivering, sweating, nausea with vomiting, joint pain, muscle ache and headache, especially during evenings is a strong malaria symptom. Severe symptoms: Anaemia, convulsions, bloody stools, jaundice, coma. Diagnosis: Based on signs and symptoms. On physical examination by doctor- liver or spleen might be enlarged. Tests: Rapid malarial test. Malarial smears taken at 6-12 hours intervals, during fever stage confirm the diagnosis. Treatment: See a doctor. Anti-malarial drugs - Choloquines (commonly used). Complications: Respiratory distress, pulmonary oedema, hemolytic anemia-destruction of blood cells, liver or kidney failure, meningitis. Prevention: Eliminate mosquito-bites by proper sanitation and prevention of mosquito breeding, use mosquito repellents, wear protective clothing over arms and legs, use screens on windows. Travellers and pregnant women should take preventive medications.  
  Sexual Health MORE
Causes and modes of transmission of AIDS
7 Tips for choosing contraception
Reasons for skipping sexThe most important satisfaction brick in a marriage's foundation, sex is where we show the greatest trust, most openly express intimacy and make ourselves most vulnerable. It is the most personal and private area of our relationship. It is the one area that separates this relationship from all others. Yet, there are times for both husbands and wives when sex becomes a burden and not a blessing, an inconvenience instead of intimacy, and a job instead of jubilee. Curious as to why people might be skipping sex? This is only a partial list and far from exhaustive. Reasons related to your body: I have a migraine. I have a stomachache. My body is too tired. My breasts are too sore. I am too sleepy. I can't keep my eyes open. I just need to take a little nap first. Okay, but I have a rash. Okay, but I have several weird looking cold sores. Reasons related to your emotions: I am depressed. I am worried. I am sad. Cry Reasons related to your kids: The kids are still up. We might wake up the kids. I just had a baby. This baby is wearing me out. Reasons related to your experts: My therapist said I need to give myself some time. My counselor said I should create some boundaries. I have to see my Gynecologist tomorrow. The Doctor gave me these sleeping pills for stress and I just took one. Reasons related to your spouse: Who was that girl / guy you were talking to on the phone? Sex, Sex, Sex All you ever want is sex! Why can't you just hold me? You should have asked in a more romantic way! Why do you have to use such crude language? Reasons related to your weather: It's just too hot. It's just too cold. It's too humid. Reasons related to your economy: When the economy improves. When the interest rates go down. When inflation goes down Reasons related to your special circumstances: We just got back from vacation! When I lose 20 kgs. Reasons related to your friends: I need to make a call first. My friend said they only do it once a month. Reasons related to your pets: The dog can see us. The cat is on the bed. Reasons related to your finances: Okay, but first we need to talk about the bills. Why did you charge this hotel room on our credit card? Reasons related to your job or boss: I have to get up early tomorrow. I was up all night last night. I had a long day at work today. The boss just gave me a new project and I have a lot of work to do Reasons related to your religion: Doesn't the Bible warn against having too much sex. I am sorry, but I just took a vow. I am giving up sex for Lent. Reasons related to your in-laws: We are in your parent's house. I have not been able to concentrate since your mother Your parents will hear us. Offer an alternative: Can I just take care of you in the shower? Okay, but you have to drive the kids to school in the morning. Use evasive tactics: Sneak in and go to sleep early. Okay, but let's watch this movie first. It's just too late. I'll be there in a minute. (Take an hour) Can we just cuddle? I just need you to hold me. Ask a sensitive question: Did you go to the bank and make our deposit today? Have you seen the kid's report cards? Wait for your spouse to tease you and then say coldly, well, you just lost whatever you were going to get tonight.
Sex during PeriodsOpting to have sex is a choice that both partners have to make. On the brighter side, sex at the time of menses may help provide pain relief from cramps or painful menses as feel-good hormones are released during sex and orgasm. It may shorten period by a few days, even if the periods are normal, healthy, but the additional contractions of uterus during orgasm might help to shed your menstrual blood faster, thus finishing your period a bit sooner. However sex is off-limits during that time of the month for most of the women as being intimate feels unclean and messy and hence they might not feel comfortable doing it at the time. Tips for clean menstrual sex: Be prepared with a towel on the bed or under the pelvic area. A warm, wet, wash cloth will help freshen up with afterwards. Position properly. Woman lying on her back will bleed less. Use a cervical cap or diaphragm to protect you from pregnancy as well as lessening menstrual bleeding during sex by covering the cervix. Tips for safe menstrual sex: It should not be unprotected sex. You can still contract infection. This may not apply to monogamous couples who have been together for a long time in a committed relationship. Though uncommon, pregnancy is possible even during menstruation.
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