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Career advice for menGetting a job these days is extremely difficult. What is even more difficult is sticking around long enough at the job. No one is indispensable, and if you don't perform well, there are hundreds more waiting to get the job! Being the bread winner, men have to face this pressure more. Here are some tips that would do you good, if followed: Cracking The Interview: The golden rule here is to be honest. The interviewers do not want to hear what will please them; So, do not try to butter them up. They are also put off by boasting . Therefore, be honest about your views and opinions. Age:wise Attitude- When you are young, and have just entered the company, it is highly advisable to observe and learn as much as you can. Find yourself a professional mentor who can guide you. Try and build on your professional presence. Be active, spend more time with your boss, be helpful to your juniors. The golden advice for all, irrespective of seniority, is to stay clear of office gossip and politics. Keep a check on the attitude: There is no need to be arrogant, and a know-it-all. Be friendly, confident, and genuine. Learn to say no: You need to have a pleasing personality. But, avoid trying to please all. Try and learn the art of saying no firmly. Too much of 'yes' will make people take you for granted, and you will find yourself overloaded with a lot of work. Do not under price yourself: If you feel that you deserve a raise, go ahead and ask for it. Do not be afraid to ask for your worth. Often at interviews, employers cancel out candidates who under price themselves, as it shows that they will probably not perform to the expected levels. Blow your trumpet: With all humility make sure you take what is rightfully yours. If you don't take credit for the work, no one will give it to you. Worse, someone else may take it! Create boundaries: Keep your work at office. Do not bring work home. Often at the outset, to please bosses, one ends up working overtime or worse, working at home. It is important to keep both the parts of your lives separate. Keep fit too: Don't let your job take a toll on your health. Working late, sitting at the same place for hours, can be harmful for the heart. Learn to unwind periodically. Setting goals is easy. What is needed is the determination to follow the rules you have set for yourself. The way to success at work is taking the ladder, one step at a time. There is no elevator here.
Anger management in menThis isn't a tirade against TV Violence. On the contrary, why blame the movies for spewing out blood, guts and gore, when all they really do is reflect the times we live in. Art imitates life doesn't it? So why blame the rising crime graph and street violence on TV and movies? Why not peep within our own selves and see the sheer ferocity of the anger which we project collectively on box office sell-outs. Examine the angry man within. So well you shrug it off and say "We didn't start the fire, it's been always burning since the world's been turning." You can certainly do your bit to help douse that fire before it turns into a conflagration, spiralling out of control until it consumes you mentally, physically and spiritually. Anger is bad. Period. Inscrutable and mysterious indeed are the ways of anger. It is to do with the pace of one's life in these times which starts it all we suppose. Then comes the classic conflict between nature and nurture further adding 'reddie points' to the anger account which is ticking away somewhere accruing interest. Someday something as silly as a traffic snarl or a bad joke or anything really trivial or big; justifiable or unjustifiable will cause this anger to spew out like molten lava from the fissures of your head. Self control, restraint and tranquillity are then mere concepts which lie in a crumpled heap as the angry young man in you takes over and hits out at everything within sight. Since time immemorial, the male temperament has been programmed to hunt, protect and gather. The caveman in most males has not evolved at all! It now wears a suit and goes hunting gathering in his corporate cave. This is the monster in most of us we have to tame through "Anger Management". We might have taken a dig at the caveman being the corporate type, but he could be anyone with an anger issues - you, me, the petrol pump attendant or even Sean Penn and Charlie Sheen. Celebrities often have the luxury of having anger issues and, as we all know it, many a famous anger tantrum is often overlooked as a creative outburst. For us however it could mean a long term in jail and much worse - our days filled with regret! Anger is an emotion and therefore much as I hate to say it necessary to tell us something is not right. So it is nature's way of helping us perceive through our senses and feel anger as a result of that perception, much like happiness and sadness. However anger has a particular corrosive quality about it which if not expressed or acknowledged can wreck havoc on a man's health. Why do you think men outnumber women right from barroom brawls to health conditions like hypertension, heart attack and migraines? Most men when questioned after socking the living daylights out of someone state that they just had that lightheaded feeling as the serpent raised its ugly hood, the blood pressure shot up and adrenalin coursed through the veins, the ears heard that sickening thud of a pacing heart and then "The other guy was down on the ground and I didn't even feel a thing when I sliced his throat open! Honest! I have issues!" Can you imagine how horrifying it must be to lose our faculties and go berserk? Can you imagine how many innocent people are victims of road rage and unjustified violence? So how do you ditch that anger? First step is to find yourself a relaxation routine and deep breathing exercises can help you be more in control of your temper. Relax your muscles of all that tautness which anger makes it do. Consciously at a regular time do this relaxation routine. Feel your body respond by 'letting go' of old holding patterns. Yoga Postures, especially the 'Shavasana' can help tremendously by relaxing excitable natures and enables them to relax the body at will. Next time you feel angry about something you will find yourself responding appropriately. Remember it is you against anger. Tell yourself that anger is like a serpent it might bite its owner. So find a suitable method of letting out your anger, and know that doesn't include steeping down on the accelerator and running into the back of someone's car. That is anger getting the better of you and that's 'Road Rage' and Murder and suicide. Punch a pillow, get a pair of boxing gloves and wallop the hell out of a punching bag, run a mile, shout your head off in a deserted place if you must, but unclench the jaw and fists and maybe you will start seeing the lighter side of things. There are enough things in this world that truly deserve your anger. Without anger sometimes we cannot enforce change on the negative things in society. Whenever we hear of a rape of a helpless woman on a bus we are bound to feel anger. However letting that anger getting the better of us and going in for instant vigilante justice for perceived crimes is just as wrong. Then what sets us apart from people who rape, loot, plunder or murder? If we all exercise restraint and express anger as and when it registers instead of holding it inside would help a great deal. If you are angry about being given the short end of the stick at work and if for some reason you cannot express it then ensure that you don't implode by keeping it in or explode somewhere it is completely unwarranted. There will be a day when we will hear "TV Violins" instead of watching TV Violence.
Ageing gracefully and happilyEverywhere we look there are constant reminders that we are growing old each passing day. There are creams that tell us that will make our wrinkles vanish and make us look younger. There are hair care products dyes that claim to cover our grey hair so that we can look and feel young. Our doctors tell us about how we have to take care of all our body parts to keep several diseases at bay in the old age! It is a rare and difficult attainment to grow old happily and gracefully. Is there anything good about old age? It doesn't seem so, going by the look of things. Here we give you 5 reasons that will make you look forward to old age! Old age is the happiest time in life: You are constantly living life to the fullest when you are young. Survival is your prime priority. You work hard to keep yourself and your family happy and financially stable. Too many responsibilities bog you down. Old age is the time when there is nothing of this sort. You are retired, free from all responsibilities. You have passed the baton to the younger lot. Now is the time to sit back and enjoy. Now is the time to relax and do the thing you always wanted to do. Imagine living with not a care in the world? That is old age for you. Old age is when the brain functions the best: It is a proven fact now. It was believed that we lose more brain cells as we age. Now it has been proven that our cognitive functions peak between the ages of 48 to 60. Old people make the wisest and toughest decisions quickly. People may call them worldly wise. Have you ever given a thought to how all the judges are old men? And how when someone says the word 'wise' the picture formed is usually of an old man with a beard? No more fashion policing: When you are young, there is a lot of stereotyping involved! Going to a board meeting, wear formals? Going for a lunch meeting, wear something that is suitable keeping in mind the place. Are you at a certain position in life? Dress accordingly! So many restrictions! Old age comes with none of this. You can wear what you please and no one will really mind! Only when you actually get to do it will you realize how much f a relief it is! Relationships improve: According to a 2011 study; married oldies are more satisfied and positive about their marriages than young couples are. Arguments involve less anger, and senior spouses show more positive emotions and affection than middle-aged couples. It's not only marriages, however, that benefit in older age. Seniors also seem to be happier with their other social relationships too. They have a smaller but closer circle of friends and gain more benefits from these close, emotional bonds. Old Age makes you feel better on the whole: You have lived life to its fullest, your kids have now flown the coop and you have seen it all. As you age, you start feeling better about things in general. You look at things more positively and make the fullest of every situation presented to you. You live in the moment and are not worried about future repercussions. Old age is a happy place to be. Look forward to aging positively.
Breast lumps- myths busted!The rise in the occurrence of breast cancer in women, since past decade or so, has made women, especially in the urban areas, very cautious about lumps in their breasts. Whenever there is a small lump in the breast, the first thought that comes to mind, is may be this is cancerous. However, instead of taxing your brain with worries, it is better to take action and consult your caregiver. Here are some of the myths that are regularly associated with breast lumps and the real facts related to the same. Myth: If there is a breast lump, it must be cancerous Statistics reveal that out of 10 cases of breast lumps in women, only 2 are cancerous. More often, these lumps are due to fibroadenoma or cysts. In many women, lumps are formed during the menstrual cycle and they go away after it ends. It is not simply possible to tell exactly what kind of lump it is, just by feeling through hands. However, it is important to detect the composition of the lump and to do so at the initial stages, so that if it is detected cancerous, early diagnosis and treatment can save your life. Myth: If your mammogram is normal, you are safe and the lumps are not cancerous This is not particularly true. To detect the presence of cancerous cells, you need to get more tests done; an ultrasound, an MRI and also a follow up mammogram, to get a second view of the lump. Doctors also suggest a biopsy to be 100 percent sure of the diagnosis. If the lumps persist but there is no detection, your doctor may ask you to keep doing the tests at frequent intervals, to assess the development. Myth: Malignant breast lumps do not cause any pain Although breast cancer patients do not suffer from much pain, this does not mean that if you do not have pain, the lump is non-cancerous. There are different types of breast cancers; and in some types such as the inflammatory breast cancer, the patient can suffer from warmth, tenderness, redness and swelling, followed by pain in the lumps. Myth: If you get a lump while breastfeeding, it is not cancerous It is true that breastfeeding reduces the chances of development of cancerous cells. But there is still a possibility and hence you should not ignore the formation of lumps. It is advisable to immediately get an ultrasound to confirm the condition of the lump. Myth: Lump in young women cannot be cancerous Women can develop breast cancer at any age. Hence, if you have a breast lump at a young age, or even if your teenage daughter has developed a suspicious lump in her breast, you should always get it checked, at the earliest. Most often, cancer develops in the breast when women are past their menopause period. But this, in no way means, that they cannot get it at younger age. Myth: Only a larger lump can be cancerous, not a smaller one Lumps in the breasts can be of all sizes; and the size, does not determine the presence of cancerous cells. According to breast-imaging specialist at New York's Manhattan Diagnostic Radiology, Melissa Scheer MD, you must immediately see a doctor, whenever you feel the presence of even a tiny lump, because, a small lump too may turn out to be aggressively cancerous. Most often, the lump in the breast is non-cancerous; however, it is advisable to consult your caregiver immediately, once you discover the lump for the first time.
Activities to help your toddler talkWe understand how eager parents are to talk to their kid. They want to hear their soft voice and babble talks. So start teaching them as soon as possible to help them to speak fast and clear. Here are some activities which will help you to teach your kid to talk. The playful ways: The best way of teaching your kid to speak is to, well,play. Most of the learning is done through playing. Be a child with your child. Act playfully foolish --kids enjoy that a lot. And when the kid is happy and in playful mood, they try to talk. Building vocabulary: Use a word in more than one sentence to make them understand the meaning of the word. For example, 'The color of leaves is green' and 'Your father is wearing a green colored shirt.' If the kids hear a word used often in different sentences, it becomes a permanent part of their vocabulary. Give them practical examples: Teach them the names of the things they see around. Or get actual objects and be descriptive to teach them the name of the object and talk about the object's features. Use a toy phone: You must have seen kids trying to talk over phone to their dads or friends. They try to copy you the way you talk over phone. It can be a great way to teach them to speak. Pretend that you are talking to the kid's dad or grandparents, and pass over the phone to the kid and encourage them to chitchat over the phone. Story telling: Kids listen to the stories very carefully. Show them the pictures in the storybook and describe them with the story. Then repeat the same story the next day. Ask your child if she/he remembers what was there in the story by showing them the picture. Help them if they get stuck. Sing together with the child: Music is another amusing way to teach the child to speak. Listen to a song, sing and dance along. Encourage the child to dance and sing with you. Children are great at learning lyrics of a song. Reward the child on completing a task: When you reward the child with his/her favourite toy or snack, they understand the benefit of performing the task. And they take effort to get the reward. Ask your child to recite a poem for you, or speak a certain word or sentence and entice the child by showing him the reward he will get on completing the task.  
Your child is ready for school... but are you?It was still okay. Just 2-3 hours which you could utilize for other things while your child was away briefly. Now you will have to compete along with teachers, textbooks and homework for your child's attention. Well Mother, we know this is going to be difficult for you, but let's see if we can try and make it any easier. Think of school as an extension of the tender loving care that you provided. The only difference is that the TLC will go towards nurturing and developing his/her brain and help it learn important skills which will help gain a balanced development. At this point your child feels bad and completely unsafe in this new hostile world of teachers and uniforms and what not! If you weaken at this point your child will cop on and then will come the emotional blackmail. So explain the importance of school to your child as it will make the transition easier. It is always good for mothers to accompany their children to school but imagine watching mother walk away and all hell can break loose. So if your child's school has a school bus facility you can walk him to the bus stop and then say your goodbyes there. A lump in the throat at the bus stop is preferable any day than a scene at school with a child holding on to mother for dear life. Do not criticize your child's school or assignments given by them as children can catch on quite quickly and that can be reason enough for them not to concentrate on school activities. Always encourage your child to talk about what he did at school and ask him questions about his friends and teachers. This gives the impression that school is as important as home and gradually even you will reconcile yourself to the fact that school is here to stay.
Are you a chocoholic? : Dealing with chocolate addictionSerotonin is a hormone that produces relaxed and happy mental state. This hormone is activated when you consume sweet and high-fat foods. Apart from serotonin, chocolate also contains phenylethylamine which produces feelings of enthusiasm and attraction. The obsession with chocolate is marked by intense craving for it, loss of control over its consumption, and continual consumption despite negative repercussions. Is chocoholism a true addiction? Chocolate is a manifestation of desires and there is also a resistance to it. This cultural phenomenon of mysterious romance and excitement increases the attractiveness of chocolate. Apart from these, advertising and grocery shop displays also connect chocolate with an object of desire, thus triggering its need in times of emotional stress. Though the symptoms shown by those who are addicted to chocolate is much like those who are misusing substance, it is generally not considered an addiction in a true sense, as this is an acquired obsession (through culture and media) than due to bodily changes. Foods like broccoli also contain the mood-altering ingredients, even in higher concentrations. The compulsion with chocolate is considered to be owing to its texture, sweetness, and aroma. Here are a few steps to overcome your chocolate addiction: Step 1- Symptom AcknowledgmentWhile it is not considered a true addiction by many psychologists, most agree that the experience of compulsion towards chocolate is much like the ones towards drugs. It is important to diagnose and check your condition. You need to have a chocolate bite everyday. Generally, a particular time is chosen, like after lunch when your mind is a little discharged and you need that small bit of kick to arouse yourself back to normalcy. If you do not have access to chocolate, you feel anxious and find ways to get hold of a chocolate bar. Step 2- Know The ConsequencesIf you recognize that you are suffering from chocolate addiction, then be aware of the problems which it causes. It will lead to a series of bites where there would be no nutritional value and only fat and sugar induced by the chocolate. You would be needy for the chocolate, and thus, your emotions will be ruled by a bar of sweet. You might get headaches after eating chocolate, but you would still eat it anyway. You might hide and consume chocolate, owing to the disapproval of your companions. Your health will gradually deteriorate with constant burden on your pocket to keep a stash of chocolate around. Step 3- Identify The CauseChocolate is a response to a root problem. For this purpose, you have to carefully observe the nature of your chocolate consumption. Note the triggers to your choco-pangs. Do you eat chocolate to lift your mood when you are sad or upset? Have you been on diet for too long, and because of suppressing the cravings, you see the chocolate bar as 'just one time' deal which is indefinitely extended? Maybe you feel excited and urge to eat chocolate just by thinking about chocolate. Lastly, you might be bored and want to while away your time. In the act of busying yourself, you find yourself munching on multiple bars of chocolate. Did you know that the impact of chocolate on the human psyche is greatly shaped by the idea of chocolate being a representative of romance and desire? Majority of young adults believe that chocolate is a symbol of love and the tendency to get addicted to it is strengthened with the hormones it produces. To avoid chocolate addiction, make sure you work on your eating pattern carefully. Step 4- Empathetic Path to RecoveryOnce you have found the root cause of your addiction, work on your problems gradually and with empathy. Don't push yourself to completely give it up unless you have been medically advised to go off it completely. Step 5- The Emotional EaterIf you consume chocolate when sad, find alternatives to feel better. For instance, some people listen to music or love to play with dogs to feel relaxed. Find your non-chocolaty solution to emotional problems. The best way would be to explore the cause of sadness and communicate with your friend or companion about it. This will nullify the possibility to there being any other dependency shift from chocolate. Step 6- The Boredom EaterIf you find yourself nibbling on chocolate when you are bored, then first become conscious of the act. After having eaten chocolate for boredom for months or years, one has to remind oneself about the act. So, look for other ways to spend your time. Pick up a hobby you like and pursue it. If you are really craving chocolate, then talk to someone who knows about your addiction and can divert your attention. Step 7- Dietary ChangesMake sure you shift to a balanced diet full of whole grain, fresh fruits and vegetables as well as water. You may also include nuts and dry fruits in your diet as well. Step 8- Scheduled Chocolate ConsumptionMake a resolution that you would only have chocolate once in three days (initially) and then slowly taper it off to only special occasions. Step 9- Withdrawal SymptomsWhen you are reducing the amount of chocolate you eat daily, you will undergo withdrawal signs. This will include headache, mood swings, depression, and in severe cases, flu. Be strong and do not give in to the symptoms. Busy yourself with other activities and do not concentrate on chocolate. Step 10- Sleeping, Eating and ExercisingThere are three prime components of healthy living: eating a balanced diet, drinking at least 8 to 10 glasses of water daily, getting adequate sleep (7 to 8 hours), and performing moderate exercise daily for 30 to 45 minutes. Focus on healthy living and build a harmonious relationship with any food item that you consume. Chocolate is a manifestation of desires and there is also a resistance to it. This cultural phenomenon of mysterious romance and excitement increases the attractiveness of chocolate. Apart from these, advertising and grocery displays also connect comfort in modern living with chocolate, thus triggering its need in times of emotional stress.
When the grey matters!Greying of hair happens to all of us at some point in life. Some may get it early and other fortunate ones may get it when they are 50. Premature greying and hair fall is a common problem faced by 70% of females in India these days. What are the causes of greying of hair and what can be done if your hair starts to go grey early? What are the probable causes of grey hair and hair fall? Deficiency of nutrients in diet. Excessive stress. Dandruff. Diseases like thyroid disorders, anemia, and vitiligo. Side effects of certain medication. Hair problems are seen more in women who smoke or drink. Childbirth and menopause are the periods of life when most of the women invariably have hair loss. Hereditary pattern of premature greying. Today's beauty procedures like coloring, bleaching, dyeing, perming, and straightening cause hair problems at a young age. Environmental pollution. Treatment and prevention Have a balanced diet. Ensure proper nutrients reach your body in every meal. If you are anemic, treat it with proper medication. This can be an underlying cause. Have a good sleep. Avoid tension and stress. Apply oil regularly and massage. Drink lots of water. Avoid exposure to chemicals. What can be done to hide the grey hair? Apply amla oil to your hair to make it healthy. Apply henna, lemon juice, fenugreek seeds paste, made in an iron container, on your hair to give them a color and reduce greying. Boil gooseberry pieces in coconut oil. When they turn black apply it on the hair. If you have 45-50% grey hair then you can use a permanent hair color.
Hypertension and Vitamin DVitamin D is one of the essential vitamins that are required for strong and healthy bones. The body synthesizes it in the skin from cholesterol when there is adequate exposure to sunlight. Over the past decade, vitamin D has been intriguing medical researchers the world over. Several studies were conducted and interesting results found. One of them being that vitamin D may be implicated in influencing blood pressure levels. As per studies conducted, it was found that low levels of vitamin D lead to high blood pressure levels. People living in high altitudes where sunlight is at a minimum level were found to be hypertensive. Also, the winter season showed an increase in hypertension cases which was again attributed to the low sunlight levels. What exactly does vitamin D do to affect the blood pressure? Renin is an enzyme secreted by the kidneys that constricts the blood vessels and increases the blood pressure. Vitamin D acts by inhibiting this renin. Insulin resistance causes high blood pressure, which is why hypertension often has co-morbidity with diabetes mellitus. Vitamin D helps in improving the body's sensitivity to insulin. Calcium deposits on the arterial walls harden them and make them lose their elasticity leading to an increase in the pressure of blood flowing through them. Vitamin D helps the body to better absorb and metabolize the calcium. The role of vitamin D in strengthening bones is very clear. Though the studies have shown that people having deficiency in vitamin D tend to develop hypertension, the role of vitamin D in this case is still not very clear. Also, whether vitamin D supplements help in lowering blood pressure levels is still to be found out! But all said and done, the research findings cannot be ignored. Moreover, a morning walk is beneficial in many other ways as well! So, get up early, put on your walking shoes and say Hello to the sun! Vitamin D alone will not help you control your BP. You need to keep taking the medications along with the other dietary and life-style changes! An early morning walk is a blessing for the whole day!
Smoking causes impotence!Men who smoke heavily are twice as likely to suffer from impotence or erectile dysfunction. The link between smoking and ED has been established beyond reasonable doubt. Smoking causes a hardening of the arteries or blood vessels. For a penis to grow erect or tumescent there has to be a healthy blood supply. Now imagine the cross-section of a smoker's penis where there are plenty of blockages and hardening of the blood vessels. Can the penis then grow erect with so many hindrances to the blood? There is also an acute loss of sensitivity to the penis which is a direct contribution of smoking! Previously, alcohol was a hot favorite of the medical lobby when it came to 'impotence.' Wish smokers could say the same thing about moderate smoking! Even moderate smoking can make an existing condition of impotence worse. One could make changes to one's lifestyle and diet and curb stress to treat ED (erectile dysfunction), but all these will come to naught unless one really resolves to give up smoking permanently. Just within a few hours of kicking the butt, the body starts to repair itself. Of course, it may take longer for the blood vessels to actually undo the blockages and have a free run for the penis, but it will certainly happen, slowly and surely. Smokers may have an underlying condition of anxiety, which is made worse by nicotine, which in turn causes performance anxiety, not greatly helped by blocked blood arteries. So smoking not just makes you physically impotent, but also mentally impotent too. It is a powerful narcotic which is hateful to the body and spiteful to its salubrity. Please enroll into a 'stop smoking now' campaign with the help of friends or family. Check for any 'nicotine anonymous' programs in your neighborhood or just do it all by yourself. Otherwise, the only thing hard about your penis will be hardened arteries and lots of hard luck!
Busting misconceptions about homosexualityIn the past few years, homosexuality has become a subject of public discourse in India. Thanks to gay pride marches and the Delhi High Court's historic ruling decriminalizing same-sex intercourse in 2009, more people today are willing to accept homosexuality as normal. However, there are still a large number of people who are still confused about whether homosexuality is normal. Homosexuals are people who get attracted to people of the same gender. Gay is a term used for both male and female homosexuals, but some prefer the term 'lesbian' when it comes to women homosexuals. Some misinformed people consider homosexuality as a purely decadent western phenomenon which is far from the truth. Homosexuality finds its place in recorded history throughout the world. So is homosexuality abnormal? A few decades ago a gay person would have ended up on a psychiatrist's couch where attempts would have been made to re-orient him/her towards the heterosexuality. However, as the American Psychology Association notes, "No, lesbian, gay, and bisexual orientations are not disorders. Research has found no inherent association between any of these sexual orientations and psychopathology. Both heterosexual behavior and homosexual behavior are normal aspects of human sexuality." Some scientists are trying to find a genetic link to homosexuality. Results so far have not established a definite link. A whole lot of factors could play a role in deciding sexual orientation - genetic, hormonal, developmental, social, and cultural. One cannot safely conclude that being "gay" is in one's genes and is therefore, hereditary. Legalizing gay marriages Same-sex marriage is legally recognized in several jurisdictions within the United States. As of April 2013, nine states—Connecticut, Iowa, Maine, Maryland, Massachusetts, New Hampshire, New York, Vermont, and Washington—as well as the District of Columbia and three Native American tribes[1]—have legalized same-sex marriage, representing 15.7% of the US population.
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