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Tips for the new fatherWhen a baby is born, all the attention is on the mother and the baby. And rightfully so, since the two need all the care in the world. However, the role of the father is very important even at this stage. The new dad has lot of responsibilities on his hand - he has to take care of both mom and the baby without getting annoyed or irritated. Here's how to do your best as husband and dad: Playing an active role in your child's life is vital for his emotional, physical, and cognitive development. Hold your baby as often as possible. By directly caring for your infant, you will learn about the baby's needs, how he communicates, and what comforts him best. Be prepared to feel left out at times. Your wife utilizes most of her energy and attention on the new baby. Be extra supportive and patient. Delivering a baby can be traumatic. Hormones ebb and flow. If there is ever a time to understand and care for your wife, this is it. Dads need to be more supportive and helpful. Share tasks like changing diapers, help around in the house by doing some household work like laundry. Talk to other new fathers about your experience and theirs. Most new parents experience a loss of sexual intimacy. Abstinence during pregnancy, pain, perineal tear, and breastfeeding can inhibit a woman's desire to have sex. Men can feel betrayed if rejected physically and mentally. It is important to talk about your feelings. Choose ways like cuddling, kissing, and holding hands to be physically intimate. One of main roles of a father is that of a protector. There are many ways you need to do this. Safety is one: child-proof your home. Dads now need to take care of driving, diet, and risk taking. Your baby needs you for a long time. Being healthy and happy dad is one of the greatest gifts you can give your kid. Dads need to provide financial protection to the new child. So get a life insurance, car insurance, an emergency fund, and a will. Try your best to spend as much time as possible with your new baby. While work may be your passion, it won't be long before children grown and no longer want to spend time with you. Take advantage of these years. Give the tiny tot gentle hugs. Dads shouldn't be afraid to show affection. Babies need physical contact, and not just from their moms. Snuggle with them, hug them, and kiss them. Read a baby-book to your child. Babies do understand. Sing him a gentle song or play a very soft music. Find out what makes your baby happy. Be good to the mom. Dads should be good and loving to mother of their new baby. Give her some time alone and babysit while she goes out, show affection to her, and give her little surprises. Because when the mom is happy, the baby is happy and the dad will be happy too.  
Handling post retirement bluesYou have given the best years of your life to your career, and now it's time to say goodbye and get ready for the retired life. It is a phase laden with expectations of all things you were too busy to do while working - spending more time with family, going on that fishing expedition, or going on leisure trips around the world. However, despite the wonderful things to come, retirement can get unusually trying and mentally taxing. After all, how many of us really have the flexibility of mind to take this period as a challenge and be the master of our destinies? Just because you are retired doesn't mean you have to wither away and wait for death to claim you. So, here's what you can do to beat the retirement blues Catching up: This is really a bewildering time, as you have a lot of catching up to do, with a lot of things. Prioritize the things you want to do and proceed confidently. You may want to spend time with children, spouse, friends, etc. Go easy on yourself, as you may not be able to fit in as many things in your schedule all at the same time. Boost your self-esteem: Retirement is particularly trying for those who have occupied important positions in office. Such people are known to throw tantrums, as they feel less wanted than before. So don't ever make the mistake of treating your family like you treated subordinates at work. That was a role that you played then, and without reducing your importance or self-esteem you can now play a different role with your family as a friend, philosopher and guide. In fact, you can use your contacts and keep the old network alive by involving youth in your field of expertise and help them benefit from you. Catch up on exercise: The more physically fit you are the less likely that retirement will be a painful process. Perfect time for you to catch up on the fun times with your spouse to remind you of all the great times you have had all these years. If your spouse is not in the best of health then just being together is such a wonderful experience in the golden years. Financial health: Your peace of mind and self-esteem largely depend on how independent you are financially. You can take up a part time job or think of innovative ways to let your hobbies and interests generate money for you. This should be an enjoyable process by which your self-esteem can really benefit. Support groups: There are informal or formal associations of retired people that do various activities like travelling. Make yourself available to them. Sometimes retired people withdraw into a shell and that only makes things worse. These support groups give a fresh perspective on all things in life.
Fitness mantras during pregnancyYou must be wondering how Shilpa Shetty maintained her fitness even after bearing a child. The simple answer is that she never gave up exercising. Exercising during and after pregnancy is the best way to stay in shape and ensure your mental and physical healthiness. It also helps you in preparing for labour pain and delivery, and quick recovery postpartum. However, there are some things you need to keep in mind while exercising during pregnancy: Measure your fitness You need to determine how fit you are. This will help in determining the type and duration of exercising during pregnancy and post pregnancy. Also, before you continue your old exercise routine or begin a new one, you should talk to your doctor about exercising while you're pregnant. Pregnancy is a balancing act After the fourth month of pregnancy, it's likely you will lose balance while you exercise. Though your baby is well protected with amniotic sac, it is better to be safe than sorry. Safe exercises Activities such as swimming, walking, yoga, pilates, and low-impact aerobics are good choices. Pregnancy is not the right time to start any new intensive exercise, but it is safe to continue with most types of exercise if you're used to them. The things you should avoid Avoid exercises where you are likely to lose your balance or could make you fall or slip. Vigorous or extreme activities such as horse riding, skiing, mountain climbing are out of the question. They carry too high a risk of injury to your tummy. Avoid exercises such as: Sit-ups Standing on one leg Separating your legs widely You should also avoid most contact sports, such as football, basketball and so on. Finally, give racket sports a miss if you're not a regular player as they can be tough on your knees and ankles. Check with your doctor Consult the doctor before starting with any new or unusual exercise. Check for any complications or unusual conditions. Also, discuss for any concern such as: Pregnancy-induced high blood pressure Early contractions Vaginal bleeding Premature rupture of your membranes, also known as waters (the fluid in the amniotic sac around the fetus) breaking early The best outfit for exercise Clothes should be comfortable and loose fitting while exercising. Wear a supportive bra which protects the breasts and is also relaxing. If your shoe size has changed because of mild swelling, you may want to buy a new one. Duration of the exercise Exercising three to four times a week is necessary. This reduces stress, fights fatigue, and stabilizes emotions in early pregnancy. Start gradually, may be with only five minutes a day, if you were totally inactive before. Add five minutes each day till you reach 30 minutes. Also keep in mind to avoid exercise on an empty stomach. Eat a snack 30 minutes before exercise. Never over do Listen to your body when it says 'stop'. Over exercising causes overheating. Raising your core temperature too much can affect the baby adversely. Always sip water before, during and after exercising. Listening to your body when something hurts or doesn't feel right - that means stop. Drink a lot of water Try to drink about two glasses of water two hours before you begin exercising. Take a sports bottle of water with you when you exercise and take frequent sips from it. It's important you don't get dehydrated. This may raise your body temperature, which may not be good for you or your baby.  Keeping these points in mind, exercise to stay healthy and fit. We hope you soon give birth to a healthy kid.  
Obesity is not just an adult problemWith fast food chains multiplying in the country faster than you can say Maharaja Mac, there is an urgent need to monitor our diet. While most of the nutritional advice is directed at adults, kids too are exposed to the dangers of empty calories. Childhood obesity is on the rise across the world including India. How does obesity affect children? And what can parents do to ensure this doesn't happen? We will try to answer some of your questions. What are the causes of obesity in children? Lack of physical activity: Nowadays, children spend more time sitting at home - doing their homework, watching TV, and playing games on PC, console tablets or smartphones. Play time on the ground outside has shrunk. As a result, they don't get enough exercise. Unhealthy food choices: Our busy lifestyles leave us with little time to plan for or prepare every meal. The alternative is to go for quick-to-cook food like Maggi. Food ordered from outside too is invariably unhealthy. While having it once in  few days is not a problem, making it a way of life leads to problems. Overweight parents: The eating pattern and lifestyle of parents has a big influence on a child's health and weight. Obesity can be hereditary. Lifestyle and environment: When parents are unable to pay much attention on their children due to their busy schedules. As a result children rely more on ready-to-eat food or junk food. Genetic factors:  For some kids, genetic factors may be the reason behind obesity. A rare genetic disorder called as Prader-Willi syndrome causes severe weight gain in kids. What health problems can obesity cause among children? Type-2 diabetes Eating disorders like bulimia or binge eating (excessive eating or drinking) Problems with foot structure Liver problems Respiratory disorders - breathlessness during exercise Difficulty in breathing while sleeping causing snoring or poor sleep What can parents do to prevent or control obesity in children? Parents must make kids understand the ill-effects of eating junk food. They must limit their snacking on junk foods. Encourage the kids to participate in physical activities and outdoor games. Make exercising a routine for the children. Join them during exercising to make it a fun time for the family. Set an example for your kids by following a healthy diet and eating habits yourself. Limit TV time and playing videogames. Parents must include whole grains, fruits and vegetables in the diet of their children. Limit fats intake to not more than 25%-30% of total calories. Make sure to go through the nutritional label while purchasing any processed food.  
Tips and tricks to deal with my toddler's tantrumsWhen your child is having a tantrum, it may usually be for something that it wants and cannot have. Throwing a tantrum is a child's way of getting what it wants. Conversely, giving in to the child's demands may be the easy way out for the parents too. But always remember that giving in is not right. The child may get habituated to this and it may prove quite a nuisance to you too. Learn to say no, gently but firmly. Giving an acceptable reason for your 'no' and also an option at the same time works wonders. All said and done, children are not that easy to handle. If your child doesn't fall in line and is adamant, let it pass the phase. Screaming out the rage, throwing away things may help the child. When the anger subsides, looking at the destruction and the obvious uselessness of it may help the child realize his efforts were futile. But be careful that the child doesn't get physically hurt in this process. For some kids, a gentle hug helps soothe the anger pent up. Tantrums in public places can be extremely embarrassing. In such situations, do not argue or scold your child or order him to hush up. It will only end up making the child more adamant. Wait till the storm subsides. Take him out to a quieter place and talk gently but firmly. One thing to remember here is to never let the child know of your embarrassment and concern that you are in a public place. Children are very smart and may end up using this to work things in their favour. It is not easy being a toddler and it is definitely not easy being a toddler's parent either. By the time your toddler is old enough to go school he will have overcome this stage.  
How to remember everyone you meet?Now that would be quite a feat, would it not? To be able to recall the name and occupation of every person we ever encountered right down to the minutiae of how, where, and why we were introduced to them to begin with! Sometimes we raise the bar of forgetfulness to the extent of forgetting just who it was who introduced us to "Mr. what's-his-face!" If only there were ways to remember the modest and average people who leave virtually no impression on us, wouldn't that save us great embarrassment? Plus it will help us do away with those sheepish looks when it dawns upon the other person that you haven't the foggiest of notions as to who he is. Stranger: Hi! You remember me? How are you doing, Frankie? Frank: Umm! I am well (this guy's face looks mighty familiar, but for the life of me, I cannot recall ever having cast my eyes on him). Stranger: So, how was your annual bridge completion? Manage to beat the Swiss pairs this time? Frank: Atta boy! Got it! This guy happened to be kibitzing at the weekend bridge club at Aldermere. Whew! Stranger: You gave me quite a start there. You looked right through me and I was quite not pleased at the fact that just last week I happened to congratulate you. Frank: Well Martin, be tough to not remember you, of course I do! Just didn't think of bumping into you here. Martin: Well, I am Walther and I can now see that you don't remember me at all! How many times has the above scenario happened to us? While it is well-nigh impossible to remember every name or face that we come across, it would be  a good habit to at least attempt our 'mental name book' to avoid an occasion for future embarrassment! Now, how in the world does one do that? Simplest way would be to carry a small notebook with a pen to make note of someone that you have just been introduced to, at a meeting or a social do. Our friends often introduce us to people and chances are that if there is no occasion to remember that person, then the brain fades it out of its memory list, as it will only use up space on the brain's 'hard disk.' Human memory might be jogged to remember trivia from 25 years ago in great detail, but ask a simple question - remember what you had for lunch last Tuesday?  - and that would be very difficult to answer, especially if last Tuesday was just an ordinary day with no special reference points around lunchtime to help you remember. Maybe if something momentous had occurred on Tuesday last, like pretty Meg from next door, sharing lunch with you rather unexpectedly, then you can bet your bottom dollar you will remember what you had on the day in question. So create reference points! When you are introduced to someone, first and foremost, reference it with who introduced you and then try and make a reference of at least one unique distinguishing feature in that person. Now you don't really require the eye of a physiognomist, and it would be mighty impolite to stare hard for the "distinguishing feature" coin to drop. So a quick look and you got 'long nose Mary Gomez' all referenced and ready for recall at the next chance meeting. Make the reference phrases funny so that you won't have any problem whatsoever in recalling the name behind the funny phrase when you most require it. Alternatively, try associating a picture with the name if you aren't very good with phrase reminders. These techniques are called mnemonics, which is pronounced ni-mon-nics, and funnily enough the very curious spelling - Mnemonics makes you want to have a picture card memory association for the right pronunciation. A mnemonic for this could be 'knee-moan- knicks". Easy enough, i.e., if you remember the sequence right. You could also try memory exercises with names picked off from the telephone directory at random. Pick an A-lister say - 'Anderson' and then flick through to D and pick 'Dougherty' and so on until you have picked at least 10 names of a different alphabet. Now, try and write down the numbers that you must have undoubtedly memorized until now. You can consider yourself blessed even if you are able to memorize the number of the third person by the time you reach person number 10. This will give you a memory for names and numbers at least. Or, go through any university web sites and look at the photo galleries of past alumni. Give yourself 1 minute to quickly glance at all the names on the page. Then try and recall the name by applying the memory picture association or develop your own technique. With regular practice, you could well be in the employ of the local police to help identify criminals off a line up. If that's too dangerous for you, then at least that will  keep your brain alert and active with this brain gym and help avoid any boo-boos in the future.
Causes and treatment of sleep talkingIt is usually believed that sleep talking is associated with dreaming, but there is no scientific evidence available to support this hypothesis. In few cases, it may be associated with sleep disorders or any other diseases. Sleep terrors and REM sleep behavior disorder (RBD) are two sleep disorders associated with sleep talking. Sleep terrors are associated with frightening scream, kicking, and thrashing. It is commonly seen in children. Awakening becomes difficult during sleep terror. Patients with RBD utter a sudden loud cry, grunt, shout, or act out their dreams, usually violently. Other causative factors of sleep walking are emotional stress, mental health illnesses, substance abuse, fever, and certain medications. Treatment: Evaluation of the patient Patients with sleep talking should be evaluated by a specialist doctor especially if it is seen in adults or associated with violent actions, screaming, or intense fear. If children with sleep talking have disturbed sleep pattern, they should be evaluated by the pediatrician. The doctor asks questions to the parents, roommates, and bed partners about the nature and the extent of sleep talking. There is no definitive treatment available for sleep talking, although the doctor may test to record the sleep pattern of the patient to identify any sleep disorder. This test is known as polysomnogram. Management Sleep talking usually does not require treatment. Avoidance of stress and plenty of sleep at night may help to decrease sleep talking. However if any sleep disorder is identified by polysomnogram, it is treated accordingly by the doctor. If underlying causes like mental illnesses, substance abuse, or medications are identified, they are also managed accordingly. Mental illnesses like depression should be treated with proper counseling and medications. The patients should refrain from alcohol, heavy meals, fatty meals, etc. The patients are advised to follow regular sleep schedule, get adequate amount of sleep, and practice proper sleep hygiene so that severity and frequency of sleep talking is decreased.
High heels can walk you to the hospital bedHigh heels make a fashion statement which makes us look tall, elegant and good but they cause injuries on a regular basis. High heel shoes have been luxury item once upon a time; today high heels have made themselves a part of every girl's life thanks to supermodels and stars. You will not find any health warning on shoes but they ought to, as they seriously put you at a high risk of numerous health problems. How are high heels and low back painrelated? High heels significantly affect your natural posture and your spine. The natural arch of spine becomes acute when walking in high heels. This poses high risk to the spine getting injured. This not only wears  and tears intervertebral cushions called discs but cause injury to the nerves too.  High heels put strain on muscles of lower back causing pain after a long day of wearing high heels. Nerve trapping, nerve pain and radiculopathy can result from wearing high heels for a long period. This is exhibited     as tingling, numbnessand pain. Arthritis, nerve pain, hammer toes, ingrown toenails and bunions are all common problems due to high heels. Calf muscle shortens and tightens after prolonged use. Jogging, playing, running with high-heeled shoes can tear and rupture calf muscles. What can you do to prevent damage? Firstly ensure your body is in top shape before you start. There is a much less chance of developing low back pain if you are strong and fit. So do activities like swimming, pilates, circuit class, box-exercise and whatever else thatmakes you feel good. Focus on activities that make the abdominal area strong includingyour deep core muscles. Secondly a regular regime of stretching will prevent a lot of problems occurring. Either get involved in a yoga class or make sure you do 10-15 minutes of stretching every day. Stretch your back, your calves and hamstrings especially. Thirdly get sports massage at leastonce-a-month. This will loosen the tightened structures, realign the spine and lengthen the hamstrings, calves and Achillestendon
Arthritis friendly workoutsRheumatoid arthritis is more common in women over 60, and is the inflammatory type of arthritis where the synovial fluid functioning is disrupted. The synovial fluid maintains the health of joints, bones, and cartilages. Osteoarthritis is the most commonly occurring type in both men and women, and in this type there is gradual wearing away of the bone cartilages, which, in turn, causes stiffness, and pain in the muscles, joints and tendons. There is a classic catch 22 situation in arthritic patients and that is they avoid exercise or are advised extreme caution while exercising. The pain and soreness which comes from exercising can be extremely discouraging, so some shun exercise altogether. Now, the lack of exercise is going to precipitate the condition further, and could even increase the soreness, and lead to deformity. This is what challenges most arthritic patients. Should someone with arthritis be allowed to exercise? And if yes, then what type of exercise will prove to be most beneficial? Main question is: Are there any arthritis friendly workouts? Doctors now recommend that exercising could actually work wonders for arthritis patients. The right method and type of exercise can help ease the inflammation and soreness of the joints, and build overall health, strength and flexibility of the bones, and joints as well. What would be a good exercise routine? The arthritis foundation recommends routines which exercise the flexibility of the joints, and build muscle mass, for better shock absorption, coupled with physical endurance should be specially designed for arthritics. Regular walking: Walking is a great exercise for arthritics. Walking at a steady pace for about 30 minutes, thrice a week, can help keep the limbs active, and could reduce the swelling at the knees, and hip joints. Warm up is absolutely essential in any work out, and here it is of paramount importance that you go through a warm up routine before you begin your walk. Simple leg raises, hand to toe stretches, and light back bends can be done to warm up the muscles and joints for your walking activity. That will also reduce the possibilities of strain or sprains of the ankles along the way. Choose your exercise route to ensure that you don't walk up a gradient, and put unnecessary pressure on your knees and ligaments. Aquatic Exercises: Exercising in water is perhaps the best possible alternative, as water is absolutely low impact. This is great for arthritic patients to reap the benefits of a swimming pool workout. The easiest for chronic arthritis patients would be to simply walk, or wade in water for about 20-30 minutes. This can help greatly with building strength, and endurance in the extremities. For enhancing co-ordination you can even try walking backwards in water, or simply float and relax the body. Avoid water which is too cold, as that might adversely affect your condition. Stretching and Yoga: All easy stretches for the limbs and joints will be helpful to facilitate ease in movements, and dealing with joint pain. Standing leg raises, shoulder raises, wrist rolls are exercises which can be done quite easily, and can help keep the body supple. Though yoga also enhances flexibility, it goes way beyond just that, and actually aims at harmonizing the life force in the internal and external organs as well. No matter what type of exercise suits you, always remember: Proper warm up exercises are a must for the arthritic patient, as that can help reduce, and eliminate the possibility of injuries while working out. Do not force your body into an exercise regimen, if you are experiencing pain. It is quite ok to take a day off if the joints are sore. Get into an exercise routine slowly as your body might take a little longer to recover from it. Always seek the advice of an expert or a doctor before making any alterations to your regimen.
MigraineA Severely painful persistent headache can put anyone in distress. Migraine symptoms vary from person to person. Some people get intimation before the pain begins. It can be sparkling flashes of light, blind spots, or distortions. Some others experience tingling or "pins-and-needles" sensation in hands or face. This is called an aura. The headache begins within 30 minutes of seeing an aura and may last for 4 to 72 hours. Extreme sensitivity to light, noise, smells, nausea and vomiting, loss of appetite and fatigue, numbness, tingling, or weakness are all-common in migraine. There is no permanent solution to migraines. People suffer for years together and keep on taking painkillers for a long time. Pain killer helps only if taken right at the beginning of the headache. Keep a watch on things that trigger the migraine and try to avoid them. Make some lifestyle changes that can help prevent migraines to some extent. Taking good sleep. Lack of sleep can cause migraine. Appropriate hours of sleep as a routine will help to prevent the attacks. Regular meals at fixed time help to prevent migraines in people who get headaches due to hunger or not eating on time. Regular exercises help to rejuvenate the body and prevent migraines along with many other diseases. Stress is another important cause for migraines. Avoid stress. Learning to manage it will keep migraine at bay. Caffeine triggers migraine in many. Avoid caffeine. Reduce it if quitting is not possible. Limiting alcohol will again be very beneficial as alcohol and hangovers can be the cause. Meditation and relaxation therapies may also help prevent migraine headaches.  
Stinky feet? Learn why!Most of us have experienced a bad smelly foot at least once in our lives. We all have that one friend or relative who has such smelly feet that he can clear off a room as soon as he kicks off his shoes! With more than 250,000 sweat glands in each foot, the feet are the most highly sweating parts of the body. What causes this bad smell? The feet contain thousands of sweat glands. During warm days or when you wear socks and tight shoes, the sweating increases in due proportion. The resulting sweat does not find an outlet and starts accumulating in the spaces available and this warm and moist area breeds bacteria. The bacteria start feasting on your sweat and dead skin. They digest their food and release the waste products. These waste products are toxic organic acids that cause the feet to smell so bad. About 10 to 15% of people suffer from this horribly bad smell. Why? This is because their feet are extra sweaty and become a home ground for certain bacteria called as Micrococcus sedantarius. Along with stinky organic acids, the bacteria produce volatile sulphur compounds. Sulphur compounds are powerful and extremely awful smelling almost like a dirty rotten egg. Teenage years also see extra amounts of sweating on the feet. Medical conditions like Hyperhidrosis can also make your feet sweat more. If you are suffering from a fungal infection of the foot, then rest assured that your feet will smell horrible. Smelly feet can be an embarrassing problem. It puts everyone in a spot. Hence, foot hygiene is important to avoid smelly feet. Always wash and dry your feet well every morning. Dab some antiperspirant powder on your feet and between the toes to soak the perspiration. Never wear the same shoes for more than 2 days in a row. Wear a fresh pair of socks daily. Keep your feet exposed to fresh air. Avoid tight-fitting shoes. Use an antibacterial soap to wash your feet if you have smelly feet. Visit your doctor if simple home measures do not prove very effective. Excessive sweating is often considered the cause for foot odor. This is not true. Sweating in itself is harmless; it is the bacteria that grow there that are responsible for the awful odor.
The earlier yearsSexual concerns experienced during the drastic body changes and feelings of adolescence are often carried into adulthood. Sexual desires are powerful and frequently go beyond the earlier popular forms of sexual expression - kissing, hugging and petting without being aware of the consequences. Anxiety the commonest case of erectile dysfunction is compounded by the present life style - get-togethers, parties, with alcohol and drugs, visits to sex workers or massage parlours which offer other sexual services leading to unplanned, unprotected sex. Consequently seen are unwanted pregnancy, abortions, drug addiction, sexually transmitted diseases, anxiety and depression leading sometimes to suicide. Males seem to have more concerns then females. A common concern is nocturnal emission (night fall, Swapana Dosh) of semen and length of penis. Nocturnal emission of spermatic fluid is falsely believed to weaken a person. Really all that's happening is that excess of sperms is being thrown out to make place for the new ones. The length of the penis troubles many. Young people fall prey to advertisements that claim to lengthen it. The fact of the matter is that a penis an erection of 2.5 wide (10cms) is enough for a sexual intercourse for a person who knows the art to satisfy a partner. Ignorance about masturbation is widely prevalent among males of all ages leading to guilt, anxiety, depression and at times to suicide. Older men erroneously think their cause of erectile dysfunction or premature ejaculation is masturbation. Masturbation is a highly pleasurable act in males. It does not harm the body or exhaust the sperms. In fact it is a safe way to satisfy. Females also masturbate but the percentage to men is much less. They also seem more comfortable with the activity. Masturbation has gone through years of superstition fear of ill effects, considered as a unhealthy practice and considered sin by some religions. Fifty or more years ago doctors and activities thought it caused harm to the body. It is said that corn flakes, the popular breakfast cereal was specifically formulated by Mr. Keleog to help a person not to masturbate. Today thinking has changed. It is now thought that it is an activity that does not cause any harm to the body. It does not finish all the vital sperms over the years so that it will not hinder having children in future. Its wide misuse is common. Persons use it indiscriminatingly when they cannot sleep, when they are tense for e.g. before an examination, some do it more than four to six times a day, which only indicates their immaturity. When done to satisfy a natural sexual urge it is a healthy activity. It keeps the person safe from infection and is said to teach the person skill for sexual intercourse. Technology has helped in many ways but sometimes it creates problems. A person hooked on to porno sites to arouse his desire is found to cause a loss of self confidence conflict with the partner sexual intimacy and intercourse. Before marriage or a partnership both male and female have concerns. Females if they have a previous partner but are getting married to another worry about the husband finding out of their loss of virginity, others worry about the size of their breasts, excessive hair on body or excessive fear of pain at intercourse. Men worry about whether their penis is long enough whether their long standing masturbation will hinder intercourse or prevent them of being a father. The absent hymen a false notion for virginity can be congenitally absent, split by exercise like swimming, cycling etc. or most commonly by masturbation. The hymen therefore is no proof of virginity. Learning to do with what they have making full use of their points and feeling comfortable and proud of their bodies help a lot to overcome the concern. Adopting a safe sex policy is best achieved by masturbation; avoiding sex with an unknown person and multiple partners; during intercourse with sex workers not using condoms every time and being careful of oral sex. Satisfying each other by caressing, hugging, kissing etc. with clothes on is safe; without clothes extra vaginal sex by mutual masturbation is safe with a trusted partner and finally not so safe is vaginal intercourse unless done with a condom correctly worn.
Are long hours of work bad for your sex life?As researchers in 'Occupational Health' indicate that working more than 8 hours a day could seriously shorten your life span by inviting all sorts of ailments like heart disease, sleep deprivation, chronic fatigue syndrome among others, it could very well mean sounding the death knell on your love life! So how does work affect play? The stress that goes with long work hours could certainly lower sex drive leading to feelings of frustration and inadequacy amongst partners. 'Erectile dysfunction' and lack of sexual desire are now on the increase amongst men with high pressure jobs and fancy designations. This in turn adds more strain on the relationship as partners naturally feel spurned due to the general lack of intimacy and sex. There is also the added danger of extra marital affairs as hours away from home can increase the chances of one night stands or casual sex thereby increasing the risk of STDs and sexual guilt which can only spell doom on the home front. So if you are a busy person this is what you can do to keep your bed from crumbling: Take a break now and again from work to call your spouse or partner. This can indicate that though you are busy he/she is foremost on your mind. Do not sacrifice your weekly offs as this is the time that your body, mind and spirit need all the healing that they could possibly get at the hands of your mate. Try and involve your mate as much as possible on what is happening at the work place. This way your contribution at your work place can be appreciated and can lessen the grouse, somewhat, like you are never available and similar other complaints. Preferably keep time for making love. These moments of intimacy are really what makes life worth living and should be given as much prominence as your promotions and annual appraisal. Do not miss out on your meals and exercise routine that ensure that despite hectic work pressures, you can still summon up enough energy to make love. Try a relationship counsellor to help you fine tune your work schedule to your home life.  
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