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Anger management in menThis isn't a tirade against TV Violence. On the contrary, why blame the movies for spewing out blood, guts and gore, when all they really do is reflect the times we live in. Art imitates life doesn't it? So why blame the rising crime graph and street violence on TV and movies? Why not peep within our own selves and see the sheer ferocity of the anger which we project collectively on box office sell-outs. Examine the angry man within. So well you shrug it off and say "We didn't start the fire, it's been always burning since the world's been turning." You can certainly do your bit to help douse that fire before it turns into a conflagration, spiralling out of control until it consumes you mentally, physically and spiritually. Anger is bad. Period. Inscrutable and mysterious indeed are the ways of anger. It is to do with the pace of one's life in these times which starts it all we suppose. Then comes the classic conflict between nature and nurture further adding 'reddie points' to the anger account which is ticking away somewhere accruing interest. Someday something as silly as a traffic snarl or a bad joke or anything really trivial or big; justifiable or unjustifiable will cause this anger to spew out like molten lava from the fissures of your head. Self control, restraint and tranquillity are then mere concepts which lie in a crumpled heap as the angry young man in you takes over and hits out at everything within sight. Since time immemorial, the male temperament has been programmed to hunt, protect and gather. The caveman in most males has not evolved at all! It now wears a suit and goes hunting gathering in his corporate cave. This is the monster in most of us we have to tame through "Anger Management". We might have taken a dig at the caveman being the corporate type, but he could be anyone with an anger issues - you, me, the petrol pump attendant or even Sean Penn and Charlie Sheen. Celebrities often have the luxury of having anger issues and, as we all know it, many a famous anger tantrum is often overlooked as a creative outburst. For us however it could mean a long term in jail and much worse - our days filled with regret! Anger is an emotion and therefore much as I hate to say it necessary to tell us something is not right. So it is nature's way of helping us perceive through our senses and feel anger as a result of that perception, much like happiness and sadness. However anger has a particular corrosive quality about it which if not expressed or acknowledged can wreck havoc on a man's health. Why do you think men outnumber women right from barroom brawls to health conditions like hypertension, heart attack and migraines? Most men when questioned after socking the living daylights out of someone state that they just had that lightheaded feeling as the serpent raised its ugly hood, the blood pressure shot up and adrenalin coursed through the veins, the ears heard that sickening thud of a pacing heart and then "The other guy was down on the ground and I didn't even feel a thing when I sliced his throat open! Honest! I have issues!" Can you imagine how horrifying it must be to lose our faculties and go berserk? Can you imagine how many innocent people are victims of road rage and unjustified violence? So how do you ditch that anger? First step is to find yourself a relaxation routine and deep breathing exercises can help you be more in control of your temper. Relax your muscles of all that tautness which anger makes it do. Consciously at a regular time do this relaxation routine. Feel your body respond by 'letting go' of old holding patterns. Yoga Postures, especially the 'Shavasana' can help tremendously by relaxing excitable natures and enables them to relax the body at will. Next time you feel angry about something you will find yourself responding appropriately. Remember it is you against anger. Tell yourself that anger is like a serpent it might bite its owner. So find a suitable method of letting out your anger, and know that doesn't include steeping down on the accelerator and running into the back of someone's car. That is anger getting the better of you and that's 'Road Rage' and Murder and suicide. Punch a pillow, get a pair of boxing gloves and wallop the hell out of a punching bag, run a mile, shout your head off in a deserted place if you must, but unclench the jaw and fists and maybe you will start seeing the lighter side of things. There are enough things in this world that truly deserve your anger. Without anger sometimes we cannot enforce change on the negative things in society. Whenever we hear of a rape of a helpless woman on a bus we are bound to feel anger. However letting that anger getting the better of us and going in for instant vigilante justice for perceived crimes is just as wrong. Then what sets us apart from people who rape, loot, plunder or murder? If we all exercise restraint and express anger as and when it registers instead of holding it inside would help a great deal. If you are angry about being given the short end of the stick at work and if for some reason you cannot express it then ensure that you don't implode by keeping it in or explode somewhere it is completely unwarranted. There will be a day when we will hear "TV Violins" instead of watching TV Violence.
Ways to look handsome!One disclaimer before reading "Looking good is not age/weight/family specific." Now we can start off with understanding what does handsome means. Does it mean wearing good clothes? Or having a good face? Or having a good body? What is it actually? Well, a simple definition could be "being handsome means being confident and having loads of style and poise." It's not dependent on somebody's face or body specifically. So what makes a person handsome? Will his attitude count? Do we need a lot of money to get that look? Let's answer all such questions in the article. Personal care: The first and the foremost cornerstone for getting a perfect look is to look after yourself well. This includes- Hygiene - Personal hygiene is most important. Dental hygiene, managing body odor, cutting your nails on time, removing hair in the underarms, nose, and taking care of overall body hygiene is of utmost importance.Skin care - Taking care of one's skin is no more a girly thing now; men need to do the same as well. Applying moisturizers, lotions that are readily available, tailor-made for men.Hair care - Men do not need to spend a lot of time managing their hair as women do, but that doesn't mean they can get all complacent about them. Try and wash and shampoo your hair at least twice in a week. You could use natural or artificial conditioners in the hair to make it soft. Get a trim every month or else they can become too long to manage. The suave and debonair look, along with the above indicated personal care methods; one important pointer is to take care of one's facial hair. Agreed that the rough and rugged look is good with some clothes and skin colors, but try and avoid it as 'a regular' and get a good shave. You can either keep a clean shaven look or keep a beard which is well trimmed. This will give you an urbane and classy look. Clothes cabana - An important factor for your looks is your clothes as well. One needs to understand that there are particular kinds of clothes which shall look good on them and there is a section which they should never try. Once you understand this thin line, you can do wonders with your clothes. Try to understand which shades look good on you. The bright colors or pastel shades. After this, you need to choose your formal and casual wears as well. Try and understand what kind of clothes make you look good and what are the options you can always try. The must have checklist is given below - A pair of good dark blue jeans. A white shirt. A colored T-shirt. Jacket and waist coat. Dinner jacket or tuxedo (whichever suits you). Pair of black trousers. Sweatshirts. A full pastel shade sweater. Accessorize your look - Along with good clothes you need a few more embellishments:Shoes - Get two different pairs - one leather and the other sports for formal and informal occasions. The shoes should be buffed with shoe wax regularly and you can wash off the dirt on your sports shoes once every couple of weeks.Belts and Tie - A good and well-fitting tie and a sober choice in belts always adds to the look of the "complete man."Watches - A good analog watch is a "must have" on every guy's wrist for that added attraction. Work out regimens - Now workout does not only mean joining a gym or keeping a personal trainer. You need to just keep your body fit, which can be done by jogging, yoga, or even a morning and evening walk. Try to be active, which in turn will help you stay in shape. You can even pick up a sport for that matter. When your body is fit, you will have a relaxed mind and soul too. Eat healthy - Having a hamburger everyday will make you only lethargic and fat and certainly far from handsome. Try to follow a diet regimen which nowhere means you need to have nightmarish boiled vegetables only. You just need to avoid eating outside which means no junk or oily food. This shall not only help you look good, but will let you be young and fit. Try to have more leafy vegetables and fish in your daily diet rather than red meat and spices. Once in a week you can dig into your favorite foods and pig out. Say no to cigarettes and alcohol - Working out or eating healthy and getting the best clothes and accessories will never help you get in good shape until you say no to all the habits which shall prove deadly for you in the future. Try and quit smoking and drinking as they affect your health and stamina in the most adverse ways possible. Along with that they also have a very bad effect on your mental health as they become an addiction and hamper your concentration and thinking abilities as well. Million dollar smile - Wearing good clothes do not have a prerequisite of behaving like a supermodel anywhere. Try to wear a good and sweet smile which shall give you a nice and attractive look at the same time. A straight face might end up making you look unapproachable and arrogant, so remember smiling always to complete your attire and style. Good stance - Wearing all the best outfits and looking a million bucks might go all in vain if you have a bad body posture. Try and walk and sit straight. Having an erect stance always makes you look more confident, attractive, and masculine, so always have that poise in your posture which shall make you look awesome. Wear your confidence and attitude - Last but not the least is this most important pointer and that is - be comfortable and confident with whatever you wear and however you look. Being confident makes you win half your battle, always. So, have that debonair attitude and head to the floor, you will always be the head turner of the show. So what are you waiting for? Start your preparations, as being handsome does not require any occasion!        
Dilemma of a working woman - How to stay healthy!Women want to be healthy and beautiful. But most of us are not able to find the time to exercise or plan our meals. We pay more attention and money on therapies to look good externally. But good looks come from good health, and good health is an outcome of a healthy lifestyle. Healthy lifestyle helps in preventing illnesses and makes us more efficient. Improper and irregular diet, lack of physical activity, and stress are the chief causes of poor physical and mental health. Most working women today are occupied with their desk jobs, and as a result have a sedentary lifestyle. Eating junk food most of the times makes the matter worse. So if you want to stay healthy, here are some changes you can make. Add movement to life. Activities like walking, gardening, swimming or aerobics help build endurance and relieve stress. Choose something which you think you can consistently - Yoga, aerobics, cycling or even dancing. Balanced diet plays a pivotal role in fitness. Fruits, vegetables, and whole grains are a must in your diet. Antioxidants in fruits have an anti-ageing effect. Choose to eat in order to satisfy hunger and build healthy body, and not to feed your emotions. Avoid junk and processed food. They are empty calories. Drink water. Dehydration affects metabolism. Drink 8-10 glasses a day to flush out the toxins. Add liquids like milk, fruit juices to your diet. Positive thoughts help build a healthy mind and a healthy mind ensures healthy body. Do not smoke cigarettes or drink alcohol to deal with stress. Try yoga, meditation, listen to music, or take a nice shower to relax. Rest and relaxation helps to cope with daily stress. Making these lifestyle changes as a regimen will surely help working women to live a life of health, wellness and fitness.  
Leg toning exercises for womenFor those women who will leave 'no stone unturned', here are a few great exercises which work superbly on the legs and whole body. For those who have always wanted a great pair of legs, don't change your jeans brand. Just change your brand of exercise. Here are great leg toning exercises that can make your legs attention grabbers. Well-shaped legs are what every woman desires especially as it signifies 'movement', 'mobility' and 'strength'. When we say legs we mainly mean the thighs, the calves and the feet. To get more precise the quadriceps of the thighs the hamstrings and the hip adductors are the prime targets of most exercises. A complete leg work out would also include the 'Tibialis Anteriors' or the shin muscles. Exercising the legs can be quite a frustrating thing especially if the leg muscles don't show any cosmetic improvement. Here is an exercise regimen which will ensure that you will get those attention-grabbing legs along with the strength, flexibility and tone which you have always desired. The stand This is probably the most undermined exercise of them all since it doesn't involve lugging heavy weights around or running for miles or squatting! It is a foundation exercise for the legs.  Choose your favorite spot on the floor and just stand erect with both feet together and toes pointing forward. Hold the hands straight at the elbows and keep the shoulders square. Tuck the chin in and do not bend your knees. Feel the ground under the feet. Now flex your thigh muscles and keep your feet firmly on the ground. Direct your attention towards the back of your thighs and keep your knees taut. Stand firm for about 3-5 minutes initially and gradually extend to five minutes or more. This exercise is simpler than it actually is as it keeps the thighs taut and firm. The entire leg gets a marvelous stretch and any faulty standing or postural habits create unnecessary tension and uneven hip alignment. The standing pose will be your first step towards trim and well-sculpted legs. The One Leg Extension After you perfect the stand, here is another great leg exerciser - The one leg extension Perform a stand as in the previous exercise for about 30 seconds. Once you get your grounding and feel your foundations beneath the feet, take a deep breath. Now flex your thigh muscles and keep the kneecaps taut without feeling any strain. Bend the left leg at the knee and raise it without bending at the right leg. Now catch hold of the big toe with the left hand and hold the pose for a few breaths. You will initially struggle for balance as you have to keep the other leg straight. Now that you have caught the big toe of the flexed leg gradually straighten the leg out without letting go of your grip. This is a challenging pose especially for the hamstrings, the hip flexors and the calves since the leg muscles are going to be a little tight especially around the hips and the hamstrings. With regular practice, the pain will ease and then you can even try and take the toe towards as high as you can with the aid of your left hand. Repeat with other leg following the same sequence. One Legged Squat The one legged squat is a superior exercise to the two legged variety is that it doesn't require many repetitions as it is quite a strenuous exercise even for advanced exercisers. Stand with the back of a chair within easy reach initially. Extend the right leg out first and squat down to your heel with your left. Once you have reached the end of the squat try not to touch extended leg as there comes the difficult part - getting up to standing position without touching the floor with your hands for support. Raise yourself to standing position and repeat with other leg. You can do about 3-4 sets with the same leg or alternate legs using the back of a chair for hand support as you squat deeply. The single legged squat exercises the gluteus, the knees and the entire hip joint and also gives lower back strength. Initially your knees might hurt so don't try this without support of a chair or a partner. Stop in case of intense pain. Step Training If plain jogging doesn't do the trick for shapely legs for you, try using stadium stairs or any gradient which is at 30 degrees and comprises even steps. Your regular apartment stairwell or even a pedestrian over bridge can do the trick. First set only walk up one step at a time. Second set do alternate stairs. For the third set you can sprint up as fast as you can the entire flight of stairs or halt for exactly ten seconds when tired and start again. You have the option of stopping as many times you wish as long as you start again after ten seconds. This can work up quite a sweat and regular step training works out and touches muscle groups that even normal running or squats cannot reach.
Bonding with the babyIt is an immense pleasure to hold a baby in your arms, isn't it? The bonding between amotherand her baby starts within the womb itself. When the baby is born, a few parents bond with the baby within minutes. But for others this may take some time. If the baby is taking time to respond to your affections, don't worry, here are some tips to help you with the bonding. Babies respond to the mother by making sounds, grasping, smiling, or crying. Touching, holding, kissing, cuddling, talking and singing help build a bond with your child. Infants prefer a human face to any other stimuli. So face your child as much as possible. The attention span of a new born baby is quite short. Hang a colorful object on top of the pram, cradle,or cot. Your baby already likes toys of different shapes. Various reflexes develop by the fourth week after birth. These include sucking, grasping, searching for the nipple and blinking. Baby may gaze at you some time. Respond by nodding, smiling, and talking to the baby. Babies are sensitive to their surroundings. They respond to music or the phone ringing by staring at it quietly. They observe toys keenly, spot colours and become happy at times. These are heart warming moments for the parents. Father's care usually builds a protective and secured feeling in a child which he carries for life and prevents building of any unreal fears in him in later life. So dads should care for and make their babies feel secure. You love to touch your bundle of joy, right? Babies love, enjoy, and need it as well. Skin-to-skin touch helps growth and development of the child. Mom's touch soothes the baby when he is irritated. Start reading to your child. It is never too early. It helps the development of reading skills and language. Babies enjoy pictures in the book. Even if baby can't understand words, they love to hear the parents' voices. During the first few months, they understand little of it, but they are thrilled by listening to you. Have a short reading session with your child daily.Dads can try this trick to make the baby sleep. Carry her around while patting her very gently on back.
Cranky kids in a diner? dealing with them made a bit easy!This has happened to many a parent. They make a reservation at a fine dining restaurant, perhaps with friends and relatives. But their kid screams, and cries,disturbing the entire restaurant, and spoiling the general mood. For this reason, many parents avoid going out altogether, especially to fancy places. But there are ways in which you can handle the toddler when you are at a restaurant. We will show you how. Carry toys Restaurant may be boring at times for toddlers. That's why they turn peevish and may start playing with forks, spoons or knife. So carry some toys, crayons, notebooks, or even a story book, which will keep them busy and you can have a good time. Order something yummy and healthy for the kid A hungry kid is an angry kid. So, order something which is your kid's favorite and also healthy at the same time. Or you can carry something along with you like fruits breads, cherries or other nutritious treats. Keep responding to what kid says The best way to keep childrenwell behavedis to talk to them and respond whenever the child speaks. Don't avoid them or get too engrossed with other people. They get cranky when they don't get a response from you. Take a round with your kid When the kid becomes difficult to handle, just pick him in your arms and take a mini tour of the restaurant or walk outside. This will distract him and relieve his boredom. Don't tolerate any bad behavior If the bad behavior of the kids is intolerable, then firmly tell them that they need to adopt good manners if they want to visit restaurants again. Disturbing other diners is not acceptable. But it doesn't mean that you punish them.You just have to remove them to a place where they don't bother anyone. Make your outing relaxed and enjoyable Above all, don't forget to have fun and make it an enjoyable evening. Don't get too carried away disciplining the kid. You can afford to be a bit silly and enjoy the time with your child.
Boost your self-esteemSimply believe in yourself. Life need to be made lighter. Pulling yourself down over trivial mistakes and not reaching certain standard definitely does not help.  Your self-esteem affects the way you interpret messages from others. It affects relationships, academic achievement, and living life to the fullest. Thus, recognize your true potential in life and work towards it. Those who have a high self-esteem always have an “I think I can” or “I will” attitude! This makes life much happier for them. Ups and downs in life are inevitable, but this should not bring down your self-esteem. One should work towards maintaining a high self-esteem at all times.  You need to have the power to control your self-esteem. It should not suffer from negative messages from others; in fact, negative messages should be viewed as constructive criticism. There are many ways in which self-esteem can be given a boost. Accept yourself and increase your inner stability so that you will not need validation or attention from other people. Meet new people. Follow examples of successful people. Don’t worry about how others might judge you. Don’t be afraid to try something new. Failures may come your way, but they are the best teachers in life. Make a list of your strengths and weaknesses. Make the most with what you are best at, and strengthen your weaknesses. Focus on the positives and practice positive self-talk for encouragement. Avoid doing things just to “go along with the crowd.” Gather courage to express yourselves and ‘stand out’ from the crowd, as every new encounter is a learning experience. Develop a support system of friends. They will give due emotional back-up. Put into place good healthy habits; ensure the right kind of diet. Controlling the mind is essential for a healthy body. A stress-free mind is healthy and calm, which will incorporate positive thoughts. Give credit where the credit is due. Praise others and accept compliments in good spirit. This builds confidence. Keep criticism to a minimum, as it brings about negativity. Appreciate life. Look your best to feel your best. It is important to be well groomed. Improve your personal living space. Perfect your skills and practice your talents. Reward yourself often. It’s nice to pamper yourself once in a while. Stop comparing yourself to others; this will increase your stress levels unnecessarily. Your self-worth should not be based upon what others think of you, but how you feel about yourself. Communicate with others, colleagues, neighbors, family, and friends. Be social. Do something for someone else – a random act of kindness! They fill up the void and bring about a different level of happiness. It is beneficial to spend some time alone by yourself. Review your mistakes and analyze the experiences in your life. This should be carried out as a self-therapy, and not as a habit. Do not become a loner. Everyone is a unique. No one else is like you in the whole wide world. This makes you special already! Everything starts with you and ends with you. Remember, nobody can insult you without your permission!! A low self-esteem gives rise to health problems like depression, loss of interest in life, and stress. It is not difficult to correct this stage which comes in everyone’s life. Learn to rise above these shortcomings and improve your outlook about yourself. Confidence comes from not always being right, but learning to be wrong. - Peter T. McIntyre.
A guide to resolving commitment phobiaCommitment phobia could impact both men and women. The age-old idea of only men being commitment phobic has fallen to ground and such a fear is shared by both the genders today. The main issue of this psychological condition is that the partner involved is also traumatically affected. The initial stages of the relationship involve making the partner feel secure about the relationship by assurances and verbal confessions about future needs of a long-term companionship. This makes the person involved with the commitment phobic trusting the latter, only to be taken aback and hurt when she/he walks out at the time, to seriously and sincerely declare their relationship. One who is afraid of commitment would often have many failed emotional relationships in the past with the justification of never having found the right person. Even though you might just be the perfect match, it is possible that they would find something wrong with your lifestyle in order to justify his/her fear. There would be consistent contradiction in their declaring of love for you and the actions which might hurt or injure the trust built on basis of the verbal assurances. Cause of Commitment Phobia: The root of the fear is the need to feel in control. A commitment phobic will feel that after a point of time there is a need to withdraw from their lover in order to have an 'upper hand' in the relationship and feel in control. Such a feeling might not be conscious. While the commitment phobic is pursuing their partner, they are also keeping in mind the way to get out of the relationship. Thus, any compliment given is empty flattery, for it presupposes their exit when the time comes. They are also afraid of facing the truth of their emotions. Coming from unstable backgrounds, commitment phobic people are very lonely and afraid of pain. The parents might have had a loveless and emotionally numb relationship. There could also be instances of physical and sexual abuse apart from the mental trauma the patient goes through as a child. Bailing out is their defence against being hurt any time in the future. Thus, the only thing they are doing in the relationship is to make sure they have the power in their hands (via complimenting and making you believe in them) and to make you depend on them. Once you are dependent and look for a solid assurance of their existence in your life, they will walk out.  Due to the fear of getting hurt, no amount of emotional intimacy and efforts seem to be sufficient for them to believe in you. However, remember that it is possible to cure the condition with proper psychological and emotional support. Contrary to popular belief, both men and women suffer from commitment phobia. The root of this fear is sown during the early years of the patient's childhood and a vicious cycle arises in which the patient withholds from forming a full-fledged relationship with anyone, blaming the failures on incapacities of the partner involved. This cycle can end only with the individual effort and support of companions and lover. Treatment of Commitment Phobia: The main aim in treatment of commitment phobia is to change the way the patient thinks about relationships. If you know someone who is a commitment phobic or if you are afraid of commitment, then here are five ways to deal with it: Way 1- Accept YourselfYou are looking for a perfect partner in an ideal context. You want a long-term loving relationship, but you have experienced throughyour life that such relationships are filled with pain and assume that eventually all relationships are only bundles of pain. This is manifested by your tendency to obsessively find something wrong with your partner. You know that your partner is loving and doing everything they can to make the relationship work, even then you find something wrong with them. When you think about commitment, you feel suffocated, bored, or at danger because it would require you to let your guards down to a person, thus becoming open to being in pain again. Accept yourself. Don't distort who you are. Write down all you feel about relationships and accept it. Think about the past relationships you have had and admit that your fear has led to breaking up of many emotional relationships in the past. Way 2- Understanding Your ConditionBecome aware of what is mentally happening when you are running away from commitment. By knowing what is exactly happening when you are walking out of a relationship, you will be able to handle and help yourself well. Way 3- Find The Root of Your FearsExplore the sources for what you feel about relationships and commitment. Discover incidents in childhood which slowly disillusioned the image of loving relationships. Consider your ex-partners and admit their merits as well. By finding the root of your fears, you will be able to become aware of it when you are in the act of bailing out on a great relationship. Way 4- HypnotherapyThrough hypnotherapy, you will get to know the root of your fear. The process also involves creation of an unconscious transformation in the patient in the form of thoughts, feelings, and attitude. Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) and Lifespan Integration are also helpful ways to treat commitment phobia. Way 5- Consciously Think About The Pros As WellThink about the loving relationships you have wanted and understand that relationships are filled with ups and downs. Every person is guarded naturally against pain and you do not have to excessively fortify your emotions. Write down all the good things about your lover. Also note down the things you find faulty about them. Then, ask yourself if your act of complaining is much like the desires your parents or closed ones might have imposed on you. Know that every person has a set of incapacities, and as long as it does not affect their love towards you, you should not be worried by it. Way 6- Imagine The UltimateIf you are not going to work on the commitment phobia, realize that you will never be able to establish the loving relationship you have always wanted. To make sure that you do not end up missing out on the wonderful experience, you have to weigh the relationship wholly. As mentioned earlier, write down both the pros and cons. Weigh your fears and decide what you feel. Way 7- Control Your Urges to Walk OutYou might be urged to leave the moment you find an imperfection in the other. Assure yourself to understand your partner. Take your time, but do not walk out. Learn to stay and work on the issues that the other might have. Way 8- CommunicateOne of the main problems that commitment phobic people have is that they do not talk about their problems, as they believe to open up about their emotions would mean to be vulnerable and to lose their power in the relationship. If your partner loves and cares about you, then open up to him/her. Let him/her know how you feel. This would prepare the other for any tough situations in the future, and you would also learn to judge and trust the other. Way 9- The Time Is NowYou might think about all the bad things in your current relationship and talk it out. However, remember that you might just be missing out on a beautiful experience because of your fear. If you want to work on your commitment issues, the time is now. Learn about your partner more and judge your relationship objectively. Be aware of any fears that arise and their source. Answer the fears rationally and do not suppress them. Slowly, talk to your partner and deal with the phobia. Way 10- Love Yourself And Build Strong RelationshipsThe first step to treating any phobia is to accept oneself and begin the process of being compassionate to oneself. Love yourself. Often, there is a fertile ground of low self-esteem boiling under the over-confidence about demerits of the other. Accept your incapacities as well as merits. Build your relationship with honesty and gradually let open the doors of your love. You do not have to suppress any of your fears. You have to confront and answer them. By communicating with your partner and remembering to receive their love without complaint, you will be able to overcome your fears completely.
5 Muscle building smoothiesProtein is highly important for muscle building as it repairs the muscles and help in their rapid recovery after a workout. That is why most of the trainers recommend taking protein smoothies after workouts. Generally, banana and peanut butter alternatively, are used to add the protein content to the smoothies. Apart from these, Chocolate is a hot favourite as well. But if these do get boring, here are some smoothie ideas, only for you. Hot Cocoa (bed-time and post workout) Ingredients: 1-cup milk (fat-free), 1 scoop whey protein chocolate, 1 packet Swiss Miss Diet hot Cocoa and ½-cup cottage cheese (low fat). Recipe Heat the milk and just when it gets to the boiling point, blend it in the blender with the protein, cottage cheese and cocoa until smooth. Ensure that the mixture has mixed well. This protein smoothie can be taken just before bedtime as well, because the cottage cheese contains slow digesting proteins that are great for overnight muscle repairing. Each glass of the Hot Cocoa smoothie contains: Calories-275 Protein-44 gms Carbs-20 gms Fat-1 gm Fiber-0gm Root Beer Float (post-workout) Ingredients: 1 scoop vanilla flavored whey protein, ½ cup vanilla yoghurt (fat free(, 1 scoop vanilla casein protein and 1 ½ cup root beer Recipe In a bowl mix all the protein powders into the yogurt slowly and stir well to avoid clumps. Now, pour the root beer in a large beer glass and add this mixture of yoghurt carefully, without stirring. Since the root beer starts carbonation process, the shake becomes quite frothy without having to use a blender for mixing. Each large glass of the Root Beer Float smoothie contains: Calories-443 Protein-48gms Carbs-61 gms Fat-1 gm Fiber-1 gm Post workout or pre-workout smoothies provide the necessary protein to the body that contributes in rapid muscle recovery and growth. Peach Cobbler (pre-workout) Ingredients: 1-cup water, ½ can of sliced peaches with juice, 1 scoop vanilla whey and 1 packet Quakers Instant Oatmeal (lower sugar maple and brown sugar) Recipe Mix all the ingredients in a blender and serve. Use an immersion blender for this one, to get a finely mixed smoothie. Each glass of the Peach Cobbler smoothie contains: Calories-305 Protein-24 gms Carbs-49 gms Fat- 2 gms Fiber-3 gms Orange Creamsicle (pre-workout) Ingredients: 1-cup orange juice, ½ cup fat-free yoghurt (vanilla flavor) and 1 scoop vanilla whey protein Recipe Mix all the ingredients in the blender and enjoy your smoothie. Ensure that you use real orange juice and not the flavored orange drinks for this one to get the desired result. One glass of the Orange Creamsicle smoothie contains: Calories-280 Protein-27gms Carbs-43 gms Fat-1 gm Fiber-2 gms Chocolate Almond Brownie (pre workout or early morning) Ingredients: 1 cup milk (fat-free), ¼ cup almonds (chopped), ½ Clif brownie bar (chocolate flavor-chopped finely) and 1 scoop of chocolate flavored whey protein Recipe Mix the milk and the flavored protein in the blender and serve with almonds and Clif bar topping. Use a spoon as you will be eating as well as drinking the shake, because the almonds and the bar chips can settle to the bottom. One glass of this Chocolate Almond Brownie smoothie contains: Calories -457 Protein-39 gms Carbs-41 gms Fat-17 gms Fiber-8 gms
Fair skin - A modern obsession!History of Complexion - Complexion generally refers to the natural color, appearance, and texture of the skin, particularly on the face. Originated from the late Latin term 'complexio', complexion is traditionally referred to the temperament which was determined on the basis of the proportion of qualities of hot, wet, dry, and cold in the human body. It was believed that the body carried these qualities depending on the climate in which the individual lived. Thus, a person living in a cold climate was seen to have 'colder and moister' complexion and so on. The biological facet of complexion mentioned below tells us how the skin adapts its color according to the climate it finds itself in. Moreover, it was also seen to represent the character of the person into different categories like melancholic, choleric, sanguine, and phlegmatic. Complexion was the center which reflected the qualities which make a balanced person. Skin color is determined by the presence of pigment melanin. Located in the outer skin layer called epidermis, it is produced by cells called melanocytes. These cells contain receptors which are photosensitive and which detect the ultraviolet (UV) radiation from sun and other factors. In response to this detection, they give out melanin after exposure. The Biology of Complexion - The complexion of the body ranges from very dark brown of Africa and Aboriginal Australia to pink with yellowish hue of the Northern Europeans. In actuality, there is no skin which is black, yellow, red or white in absolute - it is generally a hue of many colors with one dominating over the other. Our biological actuality is not reflected by the words we use for our complexion these days. Skin color is determined by the presence of pigment melanin. This pigment is under the control of 6 genes. Both complexions of dark and light have melanin. Spatially located in the outer skin layer (called epidermis), it is produced by cells called melanocytes. These cells contain receptors which are photosensitive and which detect the ultraviolet (UV) radiation from sun and other factors. In response to this detection, they give out melanin after exposure. Those in tropical latitudes, where there is highest exposure to sun, have darker skin which contains melanin acting as a protective biological envelope against UV radiation. This protective layer prevents sunburns and other damages including those that could increase the risk of melanoma. The UV radiation reaching the earth increases during summers and reduces in winters. The skin adapts to this change by tanning - tanning indicates that your skin is increasing the size and amount of melanin grains to protect against the UV. Thus, your skin color is essentially determined by genetics and the geography of the place you live in. Biological Fact to Social Conclusion - We generally mold the biological fact of adaptability of our skin into a social meter of beauty. The complexion is a biological wonder of the nature which allows the skin to absorb enough vitamin D, prevent many illnesses like anemia, osteoporosis, and rickets determined by its environment. Thus, to claim that a certain skin color is superior to others is to only deny the reality of biology related to our skin and body, thus falling into the fallacy of unjustifiably jumping from a biological fact to a social conclusion. The health of your skin must be the starting point to declaring its beauty, not a presupposed social standard unrepresentative of the reality of the body. Taking Care of Your Skin - Every skin color is determined by its biological framework placed within the environmental setup. It is essential to take care of your skin to ensure that it is healthy and well taken care of : Make sure you eat a well-balanced and nutritious diet. Stay away from junk and heavily processed food items. Sleep for at least 7-8 hours daily to ensure that your skin gets enough time to recharge its mechanism. Drink loads of water to keep your skin hydrated. Go through the daily care routine: cleanse, tone, moisturize, and exfoliate. Use rose water to remove your make-up and ensure that you do not go to bed with make-up on. Keep dirt and germs away from your skin. The best way is to avoid touching your face with hands when you are out. A clean environment is the fertile ground for a healthy skin. Make sure you wash your pillows, their covers and clean the house regularly to keep away pollutants. Stress is one of the main causes of your skin's health withering. Your skin is the outer reflection of your inner mental state. Work towards mental detoxification to cheer up your skin and body.
7 Pains you should not ignoreWhen the body cries out in pain, most of the times, you know what is bringing that pain, and you do what will help relieve the pain. For example, a serious workout may cause sore aching muscles, for which you will rest a day or two, or take a painkiller. What does one do to know why a body part is paining? One needs to sit up and take notice! The pain could be anything, from a heart attack, to an aneurysm, and could cost you your life! Pain in the head: Headaches are the most frequent pains that we suffer from. Headache could be due to a migraine, due to staying too long in the sun, due to a cold, or simply due to working too long without a break. However, in case you have a headache, and are not able to pinpoint to an obvious cause, rush to the emergency room. Headaches with no apparent cause may be due to a brain hemorrhage, a tumor in the brain, or an aneurysm in the brain arteries! Get yourself checked as soon as possible, if you keep getting headaches for no apparent reason. Pain in the jaw: This could be due to a caries ridden tooth. But most often it is due to an impending heart attack. The classical left sided chest pain radiating to the left little finger is not always seen in all cases of heart attacks. Pains to the jaw and the back are reported very frequently. Often, people tend to take the pain in the jaw lightly, and brush it off to a tooth problem. This may be potentially life threatening, as you never know the severity of the attack! Tingling, numbness and burning of the feet: Diabetes mellitus is a silent killer. Peripheral neuropathy is often the first complication of diabetes. Tingling numbness, and burning in the feet may be attributed to wearing tight shoes and to keeping your feet suffocated in socks all day long. Dipping your feet in a tub of cold water will give you a good night's sleep. But do not let it go at that. Get your blood sugar levels checked before it is too late! Pain in the calves: Do you get nightly pain in your calves that get better with putting your feet up? This is due to long standing hours at workplace, you may say. True, it is due to that. But, it is not something to be left unattended. Calf pains are due to deep vein thrombosis that occurs when the stagnated blood in the veins starts to form clots. The danger here is that the clot could break off and travel to your lungs causing pulmonary thromboembolism that is fatal! Take a break regularly and put up your feet frequently. Let the blood flow and not stagnate! Pain in the back: Most commonly, back pain is caused due to arthritis, and improper sitting postures. But if you suffer from high blood pressure, and are an alcoholic and smoker too, do not take your back pain lightly. It could be due to a heart attack or an aortic dissection! Pain in the abdomen: You may attribute this pain to gases, over eating or indigestion. While these may be occasional causes, persistent pains need to be checked. It could be anything from a gall stone, to gastric ulcers, to a swollen liver, or maybe even pancreatic cancer! Vague, medically inexplicable pains: When you have a recurrent headache or a stomach ache or a backache and you come out with a 'perfectly healthy' report after visiting all the specialists, it is perhaps time to seek the help of a psychiatrist or a counsellor. Your pains could actually be a symptom of depression. Psychosomatic pains are on the rise. The stresses we face in our lives everyday get pushed to our subconscious, and eventually are pushed up bodily in the form of unexplained aches and pains!
A fine spine - Common disorders of the spineThe spine is made up of small bones called vertebrae that are stacked one upon the other. When viewed from the side, the normal spine has gentle curves to it. Because the spine is a complex structure and happens to be at the center of all our activities, it is subjected to a lot of diseases. A common misconception of low backache is that you should rest. In fact, rest is not recommended at all. Keep up with light non-strenuous activities after the symptoms have subsided. Given here are a few common conditions of the spine: Loss of curvature: The spine, when seen sideways has gentle curves to it. The curves, when lost, can lead to pain and imperfect posture. Kyphosis and Scoliosis are the commonest form of spine curvature abnormalities.Kyphosis is the abnormal and excessive curving of the upper part of the spine. It is commonly called as a hump. It may be present since birth or may develop during the teenage years. The most common symptoms seen are a hump, back pain and muscle stiffness. The pain remains constant and does not worsen over time. If the curvature is too much, then the thoracic cage may get compressed and pressed for space. This may cause cardio-thoracic problems like chest pain, shortness of breath and even death. Compression of spinal nerves may cause loss of bladder and bowel control, loss of sensation and muscle weakness. Kyphosis is treated with physiotherapy, anti-inflammatory drugs and in severe cases, with bracing.Scoliosis is the side-to-side curvature that occurs during growth spurts before puberty. It may also be caused by spinal cord injuries and arthritis. Scoliosis develops gradually. The symptoms seen are usually by people other than the patient, where they may notice a slight slouch while walking. At times it may be seen that clothes that used to fit earlier are now ill-fitting. The pants seem to have shortened on one side. The curvature if mild responds well to physiotherapy. Physiotherapy is also useful as it helps to stretch and strengthen the muscles. This helps in stopping the progression of curvature. Severe cases require bracing and even surgical intervention with rods, hooks, wires and screws to correct the curvature. Sciatica: Sciatica is a condition that arises when the sciatic nerve is pressed upon. This condition arises when a degenerated vertebra presses upon the disc below it, or when there is a disc prolapse.  Abnormally tight piriformis muscle of the buttocks and a tumor in the spine may also cause sciatic pain. The hallmark symptom is the characteristic pain along the leg that starts from the hip and radiates all the way down. The pain is worsened by sitting and tingling numbness also develops. Treatment includes anti-inflammatory medicines and physiotherapy. Spondylolisthesis: When the spine is subjected to the pressures of daily activity, there is a lot of wear and tear that goes on in the vertebrae. This may cause the vertebra to move forward and slide on the vertebra below it. As a result, you may experience a constant backache. Spondylolisthesis can be congenital, it may occur due to trauma to the vertebral column, due to a tumor in the vertebra or due to degenerative changes in the vertebra and cartilage as a result of diseases like arthritis. Low backache is the hallmark of this disease. The pain is typically worse after any exercise that involves the lower back. The motions of low back are restricted and if there is nerve compression then tingling and numbness along the leg may also be seen.Rest and avoiding exertion of back muscles helps reduce the symptoms. Physiotherapy helps in restoring the strength and improving the range of motions. Spinal Stenosis: Degenerative diseases like osteoarthritis cause development of bone spurs in the vertebral column leading to its narrowing. This puts pressure on the nerves and leads to pain and tingling and numbness. Cervical Spondylosis: This condition occurs due to degenerative changes in the vertebrae of the neck region. Commonly seen as neck stiffness with pain that radiates all the way down the arm.  The pain occurs as the nerves get compressed by disc prolapse or bone outgrowths in the vertebra. Treatment includes neck immobilization, cervical traction, medications for pain and physiotherapy. Ways to reduce spine problems and backache are: Quit smoking Adopt a perfect posture Do exercises that will strengthen your core, lower back muscles and abs. Do not ignore or overlook the pains. Consult your doctor at the earliest. Spinal problems are the ones that are frequently overlooked. Ignoring the symptoms may lead to worsening of the problem. See your doctor at the earliest to be safe. The spine is the backbone of our body, in the true sense of the word. It is up to us to keep our spine in good condition as an unhealthy spine will interfere with almost all our body functions.
Internet and sex : Decoding virtual pornographyPornography is broadly categorized as softcore or hardcore. While hardcore contains intensive and highly graphic forms of sexual content, softcore constitutes less intensive form of sexual content. Genres of pornography are determined on the basis of the type of content and the status of the participants. The common sub-genres are ethnic, fetish, reality, group, and amateur. There are also sexual content specially created for different sexual orientations: heterosexual, homosexual, and bisexual. While sexual needs are natural and part of our biological set-up, the use of pornography is widely criticized for putting forward a partial portrayal of who a human being is. Majority of the pornographic material express a human only in sexual terms- as being someone looking for sexual endeavors- without paying attention to and inclusion of the person's emotional and mental state. The explication of human beings as purely sexual beings closes the eyes of the viewers many a times to the emotional and mental aspect of sexual intercourse, thus perverting the way they look at sexual intercourse in their relationships. Since sex is not holistically discussed on public platform as part of a healthy relationship and one only has access to understanding sexual practice through pornography which portrays a certain mechanistic and physically-induced aspect of sexual acts, viewing of pornography comes with the risk of sex addiction. Moreover, since pornography generally engages participants whose possess bodies which are conventionally considered sexually appealing, the viewers could implicitly get dissatisfied with their sex lives due to non-duplication of the same form of bodies in real life. Medical researches have also found that apart from having unreal expectations from one's partners, the viewer might find themselves lowly in sexual matters due to the sexual practices performed on the pornographic content that can be difficult to duplicate or are disliked. The portrayal of women in pornography is generally of persons who have no issues with being dominated over and who find such domination also sexually arousing. However, such a view is overwhelmingly false and a viewer on a regular fodder of such pornography could end up with deeply flawed perspective on women. Lastly, pornography also expresses various types of perverse forms of sex which are harmful to society, especially vulnerable groups. These include child sex, office-related sexual content, rough and rape sex, and public sexual acts. While pornography is a sure avenue to possibility of sexual perversion, healthy ways of satisfying one's sexual needs must be acknowledged and taken up. Moreover, it is integral that socially, sexual intercourse is recognized as a healthy part of emotional relationship. It needs not only absorbed as a purely physical act which is morally judged and shunned- the latter approach only increases the probability of pornography being seen as a last resort to learn about sex. In talking about sex as a natural process between mutually approving adults and as part of emotional relationship, we reduce the chances of sex being seen as a non-emotional activity and allow for there to be holistic understanding of sexual intercourse. For adolescents who are entering the age of sexual maturation, it is integral to introduce the physical relation between persons as being a result of emotional relationships, with understanding of the body holistically - as a harmony between physical and mental states. In the case of non-presence of holistic guidance, the chances of teenagers falling prey to pornography to understand sexual intercourse is high and as has been earlier explored, such an understanding of sex as activity between solely sexually-charged beings could result in perverted view of emotional relationships as well.
Impact of sexual dissatisfaction on mental healthIn an idyllic world, this may sound all "sugar and spice and everything nice," but in reality the matter of having sex is considered to be a taboo, something that is looked down upon - not just in third world countries, but in some parts of the  developed world as well. Add to that the effects of being sexually dissatisfied, which is also looked down upon and frowned upon. When a couple finally decides to take the plunge, there are the normal worries such as sexual compatibility, satisfaction, frequency, taboos, etc. What if your spouse/partner is dissatisfied? What if he/she doesn't consider it a pleasurable experience? These questions often arise in any relationship and it is only natural, but what happens when these worries often turn into realities? The dissatisfaction takes a toll on your mental health. Yes, your mental health suffers thanks to your sexual dissatisfaction. Every partner has some amount of expectations as far as sex is concerned, and when those expectations are not matched, dissatisfaction begins to set in. Generally speaking, when a person is sexually satisfied, he or she is always in a better frame of mind, but when they are not, their behavior around people goes downhill. Not just that, but their frustration and angst builds up, taking a toll on their mental health and their relationships as well. Many a times when the couple is incompatible, they decide to keep quiet rather than talk about it. This takes a toll on their mental health, which then turns into stress and its build up can lead to depression, or worse. Even the memories of past transgressions and the guilt after can lead to sexual dissatisfaction, which can either make or break any relationship. There are multiple reasons as to why a person is dissatisfied sexually, be it due to sexual dysfunctions, lower stamina, sexual orientation, or so forth! Rather than accepting that there is a problem, people usually turn to drugs, alcohol, or even someone else for dependency, which also causes mental as well as hormonal imbalance. Most people when asked about sexual dissatisfaction shy away than deal with it, as they are ashamed of it and are afraid to talk to about it. However, what they don't realize is that not talking about it will only lead to problems such as depression, anxiety, dependency, and bouts of sudden outburst which can lead to a severed relationship, not just with your spouse or partner, but also with your family and friends. Sexual dissatisfaction is often the primary cause of depression, which, if not treated, can lead to a host of other problems. So if you are suffering from sexual dissatisfaction and are under great amount of mental strain, it is always better to be open about it to your partner or consult a therapist. Prevention is always better than a cure! Talking about it to someone can lead to you releasing your mental strain and the end result will be your personal satisfaction.
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