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Absent father, violent kids!When children are growing up, they undergo a lot of hormonal changes and have varying emotional requirements. If these requirements are not fulfilled by the presence of both parents, they can develop into violent adults. Single parenting for a mother, is extremely difficult; it is simply impossible for her to fill the void left behind by an absent father. When a couple cannot live under the same roof due to major differences, they separate or get divorced. However, the requirements of the children remains the same; they still need the care and love of their mother and the support and guidance of their father, to grow up without any complications or insecurities. Children usually look up to their father as a symbol of strength and security and in his absence, they might not receive the same support and may feel inadequate and insecure. If during their childhood kids do not get the support and security that only a father can provide, they might bottle up the feelings inside; and these feelings usually explode when they grow into violent adults. A Father's Absence is Critical Due to whatever reasons, if the father is not present in the family during the most important growing periods of the kids, they have more chances of turning to crime and drugs, than the children who have a father by their side. According to a research conducted by the Research Institute of the McGill University Health Center located in Quebec, a father's absence, especially during the child's prime growing period, can lead to behavioral problems when they grow into adults. The research was carried out on mice raised only by their mothers and showed that the mice that were brought up in the absence of their fathers, were  abnormal and aggressive in their social interactions. Gabriella Gobbi, who is an author and a senior associate professor at the McGill University - Faculty of Medicine, says that even though the experiment was carried out on mice, the findings are highly relevant to the behavior of humans, under similar circumstances. Role of Fathers and Fatherhood Another research carried out by Dr. David Popenoe, a renowned sociologist, throws light on the role of fatherhood and fathers. According to Popenoe, fathers should not be treated as mere second adults in the family. Fathers, who are more involved in their family, have a certain positive impact on the children, which no other person is capable of. Fatherhood is an important responsibility and the presence of fathers in a family, directly influences the well-being of the growing children. In the absence of fathers, mothers may try their level best to provide their children with the right kind of upbringing and education. However, they might fail to give the kids the support and strength that only a father can provide. Due to this, children fail to face the challenges of life head on and are unable to handle their problems with an open mind. When a lot of emotions get bottled up inside, in most cases, they find their release in the form of violence. Sometimes, children also lack the right kind of guidance in their growing years and mothers fail to handle their changing emotional requirements, due to which these kids become increasingly frustrated and violent as they grow up.  
Broad chest, weak lungs - Are men more prone to respiratory diseases?The long-standing, chronic afflictionof the respiratory disease is called as COPD, i.e., Chronic Obstructive Pulmonary Disease. COPD is the obstruction within the lung tissue, causing improper circulation and entrapment of air. This limits the space for air to move in and out, directly affecting the quality of inhalation. A small reminder here may be necessary - breathing is synonymous with life, why? Because that's how we get oxygen, which is vital for the functioning of each and every cell within the body. With COPD, the ability to take in oxygen gets compromised increasingly. Continued cough, sputum, and shortness of breath are the main symptoms. COPD is more common in men. Does it have to do anything with being a male? Not necessarily. No specific link has been established to say that COPD risk is higher for you solely because you are a man. Then, what could it be? A study conducted in 2011 in USA showed that the number of men who smoke is 5% more than the women who do. To understand the reason behind this, let us see the primary causes of this disease. Air pollution, some genetic predispositions, frequent acute infections, exposure to harmful chemicals for a long time (usually occupational) - are some of the main causes, and the number one cause is smoking, owing to almost 80-90% of the cases. Park this thought. Next piece of information is simply revisiting some facts you may already know: #The gender classification ofsmokers - Men are known to smoke more than women all over the world, not only in numbers, but also in quantity. Whether it is a developing country or a developed one, 2011 studies say there are more male smokers everywhere than female smokers. Not only there are more men who smoke, they smoke for longer periods and more number of cigarettes than female smokers. This may vary from country to country, like India has much less women smokers than USA does, but the difference between the two genders holds true everywhere, only the ratios differ. #Occupational exposure to harmful chemicals and gases - These are industries of mining, textile, chemical engineering, welding, etc. The number of men working in such industries is way higher than women. #Air pollution - Men are more exposed to air pollution since they are outdoors more than women. This may not apply to all countries and societies, but is generally true. Now, we can put the pieces together and understand why COPD is more common in men? Yes, they are at a higher risk because of higher exposure to smoking, pollutants and irritants. Cigarette smoking is the leading cause of lung diseases and male smokers outnumber women across the world. You can figure out the math here!
Honeymoon cystitisHoneymoon cystitis is a term for urinary tract infections that occur commonly during early marriage. Sexual intercourse is the primary reason for developing this infection. The infection occurs when the E. coli bacteria that are normally present in the bowel are introduced into the urethra. This may happen through sexual intercourse, inserting unclean fingers or objects into the vagina. Women who wash their private parts from the back to front also have an increased chance of developing infection. Symptoms of honeymoon cystitis may include a burning or painful sensation during urination, the urge to urinate frequently, cloudy urine, blood-tinged urine, and/or pain above the pubic bone. Any of these is enough o play a spoilsport and dampen your honeymoon mood! Symptoms of honeymoon cystitis generally emerge within a day or two after bacteria are introduced into the urethra. A physician can confirm the diagnosis of infection through a simple urine test. The treatment usually involves antibiotics and pain-killers. What care should you take to avoid honeymoon cystitis from recurring? Use water based lubricant during sexual intercourse Urinate before and immediately after intercourse to flush out the bacteria from the urethra. Drink plenty of water to keep the urine normal Avoid coffee, tea and aerated drinks See a gynaecologist or a urologist if the problem recurs.  Urinary tract infections are extremely common in women and are the leading cause for visits to the doctor.
Hairy tale: Hirsutism in womenThe condition is called Hirsutism where women grow coarse hair just like males on the face, chest or elsewhere. The primary cause for Hirsutism is hormonal imbalances by the over stimulation or excess production of male hormones (present in minute quantities in females too). The thickness of hair that grows largely depends on our genes and at times Hirsutism in women may be just a hereditary trait rather than an imbalance. Self care and medication can take of it in such a case. Idiopathic Hirsutism is a type of this condition where there is no possible cause for the male type hair growth. These women have regular menstrual cycles and no Androgen excesses, yet they have Hisrutism. Hirsutism with excessive bodily and facial hair, usually in a male pattern, in women may be present in normal adults as an expression of an ethnic characteristic or may develop in children or adults as the result of androgen excess due to tumors, or of non-androgenetic or other drugs. Hirsutism can make its appearance at menopause or soon after as there are a lot of hormonal changes that occur in the female body, and in certain cases women grow hair even on the lip, nipples, abdomen and upper shoulders. And just as men go bald there can also be a receding hairline and baldness in women accompanied by a deepening of the voice and enlargement of the clitoris. If the hair growth occurs at puberty then a doctor's evaluation is most essential as it could be more than just Hirsutism.
Your child is ready for school... but are you?It was still okay. Just 2-3 hours which you could utilize for other things while your child was away briefly. Now you will have to compete along with teachers, textbooks and homework for your child's attention. Well Mother, we know this is going to be difficult for you, but let's see if we can try and make it any easier. Think of school as an extension of the tender loving care that you provided. The only difference is that the TLC will go towards nurturing and developing his/her brain and help it learn important skills which will help gain a balanced development. At this point your child feels bad and completely unsafe in this new hostile world of teachers and uniforms and what not! If you weaken at this point your child will cop on and then will come the emotional blackmail. So explain the importance of school to your child as it will make the transition easier. It is always good for mothers to accompany their children to school but imagine watching mother walk away and all hell can break loose. So if your child's school has a school bus facility you can walk him to the bus stop and then say your goodbyes there. A lump in the throat at the bus stop is preferable any day than a scene at school with a child holding on to mother for dear life. Do not criticize your child's school or assignments given by them as children can catch on quite quickly and that can be reason enough for them not to concentrate on school activities. Always encourage your child to talk about what he did at school and ask him questions about his friends and teachers. This gives the impression that school is as important as home and gradually even you will reconcile yourself to the fact that school is here to stay.
Dealing with obsessive thinking and worriesAn old adage goes - 'Worry is like a rocking chair. It gives you something to do but it doesn't get you anywhere'. This is absolutely true for many of us who have developed the habit of worrying unnecessarily over outcomes and circumstances. Thinking about things and over our course of action is a good thing because you should always think twice before acting. What about obsessive thinking? Is it good for you? Anything in extremity is a bad thing, whether it is your favorite food or your thoughts. Worrying incessantly is a part of obsessive thinking where you cannot let go of negative thoughts and they circulate in your mind continuously. Obsessive thinking is a negative infinite loop, a broken record that is stuck without having anyone to click the stop button. So how should you deal with this obsessive thinking that is sure to spell your doom in the long run? Though psychologists have devised various scientific methods of overcoming obsessive thoughts and worries, here we have listed down some easy to follow rituals that will help you deal with such worries and thoughts. Meditation - Yoga swears by the art of meditation as it is thought to release all negative energy from the mind and soul. Concentrating on your breathing and also absorbing a positive source of energy is the essence of meditation. So whenever you are obsessed about something, sit down, calm your nerves and meditate. Physical activity - Exercising always helps. Engage in physical activity which increases the body's metabolism and requires effort. Indulge in those dance lessons or swimming or maybe cycling and you will divert your mind from those negative thoughts. Indulge in your hobbies - So you thought you don't have time for your hobbies, but your hobbies relax your mind and body. Moreover, a hobby also takes out the creative side in you. So, whether you like to collect coins or stamps, or lean towards arts and crafts, a hobby is sure to occupy your mind and take you away from worries. Socialize - Friends and relatives are your lifeline as they help you in those tough situations. Even if you are mentally not at peace, making social calls on your friends and relatives will take the edge off.  Try to meet people who can empathize with you and help you move out of it. Socializing will give you that much needed break from the vicious cycle of your thoughts. Though a short-term relief, going out for movies or taking a weekend getaway with your near and dear ones or even indulging your wife in shopping, can be helpful. Confide - Talking to someone close who understands you helps you in expressing your troubles. Thinking obsessively, you usually tend to ignore your feelings and emotions. Your mind remains trapped in the net of those obsessive thoughts and your emotional well-being takes a backseat. When you talk to another person, he or she will hear you out and help you relieve the stress that is on your mind. They would understand your state of well-being and support you emotionally. Be mindful - You may find it easy to go back into the same negative thought process. Don't let your mind chatter. Stop your mind by standing up for yourself. Stand in front of the mirror and say, "I am not a victim. I have the power and strength to move ahead" Do this whenever you become aware that you are going back into the same thought process.  This will give you the mental strength needed to come out of it.  Be mindful and aware but don't be too harsh on yourself. Be responsible -Your mind can make you or break you. If you understand this truth you will find it easier to manage your thoughts. Take responsibility of your thoughts good or bad.  The mind can create thoughts to project blame or judgments about others.  When you own your thoughts, you will find it easier to shape them the way you want. Create a higher vision of your life - When you keep a higher vision in your life, you can move ahead easily.  By developing a higher vision, you are asking yourself, who am I?and finally working towards it. You take positive actions and thus there would be more gratitude for what you have and less resentment for things that do not work.   This stops your mind from working unnecessarily. Obsessive worrying is a psychological disorder which in extreme cases has to be dealt with pathologically. Do not let your condition to reach the extreme end of the spectrum. Follow the above mentioned suggestions and try to deal with those thoughts yourself. It may take some time but rest assure, it will be effective in the long run.
Are you a chocoholic? : Dealing with chocolate addictionSerotonin is a hormone that produces relaxed and happy mental state. This hormone is activated when you consume sweet and high-fat foods. Apart from serotonin, chocolate also contains phenylethylamine which produces feelings of enthusiasm and attraction. The obsession with chocolate is marked by intense craving for it, loss of control over its consumption, and continual consumption despite negative repercussions. Is chocoholism a true addiction? Chocolate is a manifestation of desires and there is also a resistance to it. This cultural phenomenon of mysterious romance and excitement increases the attractiveness of chocolate. Apart from these, advertising and grocery shop displays also connect chocolate with an object of desire, thus triggering its need in times of emotional stress. Though the symptoms shown by those who are addicted to chocolate is much like those who are misusing substance, it is generally not considered an addiction in a true sense, as this is an acquired obsession (through culture and media) than due to bodily changes. Foods like broccoli also contain the mood-altering ingredients, even in higher concentrations. The compulsion with chocolate is considered to be owing to its texture, sweetness, and aroma. Here are a few steps to overcome your chocolate addiction: Step 1- Symptom AcknowledgmentWhile it is not considered a true addiction by many psychologists, most agree that the experience of compulsion towards chocolate is much like the ones towards drugs. It is important to diagnose and check your condition. You need to have a chocolate bite everyday. Generally, a particular time is chosen, like after lunch when your mind is a little discharged and you need that small bit of kick to arouse yourself back to normalcy. If you do not have access to chocolate, you feel anxious and find ways to get hold of a chocolate bar. Step 2- Know The ConsequencesIf you recognize that you are suffering from chocolate addiction, then be aware of the problems which it causes. It will lead to a series of bites where there would be no nutritional value and only fat and sugar induced by the chocolate. You would be needy for the chocolate, and thus, your emotions will be ruled by a bar of sweet. You might get headaches after eating chocolate, but you would still eat it anyway. You might hide and consume chocolate, owing to the disapproval of your companions. Your health will gradually deteriorate with constant burden on your pocket to keep a stash of chocolate around. Step 3- Identify The CauseChocolate is a response to a root problem. For this purpose, you have to carefully observe the nature of your chocolate consumption. Note the triggers to your choco-pangs. Do you eat chocolate to lift your mood when you are sad or upset? Have you been on diet for too long, and because of suppressing the cravings, you see the chocolate bar as 'just one time' deal which is indefinitely extended? Maybe you feel excited and urge to eat chocolate just by thinking about chocolate. Lastly, you might be bored and want to while away your time. In the act of busying yourself, you find yourself munching on multiple bars of chocolate. Did you know that the impact of chocolate on the human psyche is greatly shaped by the idea of chocolate being a representative of romance and desire? Majority of young adults believe that chocolate is a symbol of love and the tendency to get addicted to it is strengthened with the hormones it produces. To avoid chocolate addiction, make sure you work on your eating pattern carefully. Step 4- Empathetic Path to RecoveryOnce you have found the root cause of your addiction, work on your problems gradually and with empathy. Don't push yourself to completely give it up unless you have been medically advised to go off it completely. Step 5- The Emotional EaterIf you consume chocolate when sad, find alternatives to feel better. For instance, some people listen to music or love to play with dogs to feel relaxed. Find your non-chocolaty solution to emotional problems. The best way would be to explore the cause of sadness and communicate with your friend or companion about it. This will nullify the possibility to there being any other dependency shift from chocolate. Step 6- The Boredom EaterIf you find yourself nibbling on chocolate when you are bored, then first become conscious of the act. After having eaten chocolate for boredom for months or years, one has to remind oneself about the act. So, look for other ways to spend your time. Pick up a hobby you like and pursue it. If you are really craving chocolate, then talk to someone who knows about your addiction and can divert your attention. Step 7- Dietary ChangesMake sure you shift to a balanced diet full of whole grain, fresh fruits and vegetables as well as water. You may also include nuts and dry fruits in your diet as well. Step 8- Scheduled Chocolate ConsumptionMake a resolution that you would only have chocolate once in three days (initially) and then slowly taper it off to only special occasions. Step 9- Withdrawal SymptomsWhen you are reducing the amount of chocolate you eat daily, you will undergo withdrawal signs. This will include headache, mood swings, depression, and in severe cases, flu. Be strong and do not give in to the symptoms. Busy yourself with other activities and do not concentrate on chocolate. Step 10- Sleeping, Eating and ExercisingThere are three prime components of healthy living: eating a balanced diet, drinking at least 8 to 10 glasses of water daily, getting adequate sleep (7 to 8 hours), and performing moderate exercise daily for 30 to 45 minutes. Focus on healthy living and build a harmonious relationship with any food item that you consume. Chocolate is a manifestation of desires and there is also a resistance to it. This cultural phenomenon of mysterious romance and excitement increases the attractiveness of chocolate. Apart from these, advertising and grocery displays also connect comfort in modern living with chocolate, thus triggering its need in times of emotional stress.
Diet to help manage stressYou cannot avoid stress, as it has now become an integral part of modern lifestyle. Children are worried about their exams and performances in the cultural events, teenagers are stressed out about their looks and body shape, adults take stress owing to competition at work, and so on. One thing is sure that you cannot stay away from stress. So, how can you avoid the side effects caused due to stress? You can include certain foods in your diet that help manage your level of stress. Researchers are already on to it, studying the effects of various foods on the stress levels. It is always better to choose from the organically harvested nuts, veggies, fruits, and fish for better health benefits. Nori Sushi nori is a type of seaweed that is rich in magnesium that contains anxiety-fighting properties. Magnesium is also known for stress reducing abilities. Apart from this, it also carries other essential health nutrients that are necessary for the overall development of health. Vitamin C Foods Cantaloupe is composed of vitamin C that is a renowned stress buster. Another great stress busting food is orange. When you are under stress, adrenal glands in your body start producing cortisol that lowers your immune system's capacity. This leads to breaking down of muscle tissue. Vitamin C in oranges have the ability to return the high blood pressure to normal level. Moreover, when you are stressed there are chances of this vitamin getting used up and hence the need to increase your intake of vitamin C rich foods. Another popular vitamin C enriched food is blueberries that are also packed with lots of antioxidants which relieve stress. Almonds Almond is a treasure trove of essential nutrients such as vitamin E, B2, zinc, and magnesium. Although they are high in fat, they provide your body with all these essential nutrients. You can easily have a handful of almonds every day and still feel less guilty about.  Apart from the fat, energy, and the essential nutrients, almonds give the brain and its memory a shot in the arm. Broccoli Broccoli is rich in vitamin B and folic acid, both proven stress busters that helps in giving you relief from panic, anxiety, stress, and depression. Bananas Bananas contain one of the most important amino acids - tryptophan that gets transformed into serotonin which is a stress-busting hormone that is known to induce a feeling of well being. This makes you happier and gives you relief from stress. Banana is also rich in potassium. Potassium regulates the heart due to which the blood pressure can be kept under control. That is why many health experts recommend inclusion of a potassium-rich diet, as it normalizes your heart rate and help you calm down in stressful situations. This makes banana an essential food addition to your diet. Chocolate The dark chocolates are bitter and give you a feeling of satiation despite the little amount you devour. Due to this feeling, you eat less, but you still enjoy the flavor of the chocolate, much more than the milk chocolate varieties. When you are under stress, most of your body organs are vulnerable to damage. The antioxidants polyphenols that are present in the dark chocolate slow down the damage and also contribute in its repair. Studies have also revealed that 40 grams of dark chocolate per day helps reduce stress-causing hormones such as catecholamine and cortisol. Increasing the intake of stress busting foods in your daily diet can help control diabetes and hypertension.
Flash the pearliesRemember the lines from the song, Words? Smile an everlasting smile, a smile can bring you near to me.  Well, ideally, you wouldn't want your teeth to be yellow when you flash that smile. So for those who have shades of yellow on their teeth, here's how you can go back to white. It's first important to understand what causes yellowing of the teeth. Eating habits: Carbonated drinks dissolve teeth enamel. Tea, coffee and other caffeinated drink stain the teeth yellow.In addition, alcohol and cigarette smoking too can stain teeth. Tobacco chewing especially produces stains that are difficult to remove.Food rich in artificial sweeteners are harmful for teeth. They not only make the teeth yellow but also produce cavities. Chocolates, pastries, ice-creams and all such sugar-rich foods are sticky. They stick to teeth and have corroding effect on tooth enamel and dentin and cause yellow teeth, decay and toothache. Oral hygiene: Poor hygiene of oral cavity leads to stains and caries. Take good care of your teeth. Brush teeth twice. Floss them and use a mouthwash. Ageing: Gradual loss of enamel and wear and tear lead to yellow teeth. Medicines: Medicines like iron tablets, tetracycline too can lead to yellow teeth. Injury: Trauma to teeth can sometimes lead to yellowing. This is common amongst kids. Preventing yellowing of teeth Maintain a good dental hygiene. Brush twice for atleast 3-4 minutes. But be gentle while brushing teeth. Gargle every time after you eat.This removes the leftover food particles and keeps the teeth clean. Avoid use of local powders or corrosive substances. They damage enamel. Fruits like apple, cucumber, and carrot act like cleansing agents and keep teeth clean. Fruits like sweet lime are rich in vitamin C and help to keep gums and teeth healthy.
7 Pains you should not ignoreWhen the body cries out in pain, most of the times, you know what is bringing that pain, and you do what will help relieve the pain. For example, a serious workout may cause sore aching muscles, for which you will rest a day or two, or take a painkiller. What does one do to know why a body part is paining? One needs to sit up and take notice! The pain could be anything, from a heart attack, to an aneurysm, and could cost you your life! Pain in the head: Headaches are the most frequent pains that we suffer from. Headache could be due to a migraine, due to staying too long in the sun, due to a cold, or simply due to working too long without a break. However, in case you have a headache, and are not able to pinpoint to an obvious cause, rush to the emergency room. Headaches with no apparent cause may be due to a brain hemorrhage, a tumor in the brain, or an aneurysm in the brain arteries! Get yourself checked as soon as possible, if you keep getting headaches for no apparent reason. Pain in the jaw: This could be due to a caries ridden tooth. But most often it is due to an impending heart attack. The classical left sided chest pain radiating to the left little finger is not always seen in all cases of heart attacks. Pains to the jaw and the back are reported very frequently. Often, people tend to take the pain in the jaw lightly, and brush it off to a tooth problem. This may be potentially life threatening, as you never know the severity of the attack! Tingling, numbness and burning of the feet: Diabetes mellitus is a silent killer. Peripheral neuropathy is often the first complication of diabetes. Tingling numbness, and burning in the feet may be attributed to wearing tight shoes and to keeping your feet suffocated in socks all day long. Dipping your feet in a tub of cold water will give you a good night's sleep. But do not let it go at that. Get your blood sugar levels checked before it is too late! Pain in the calves: Do you get nightly pain in your calves that get better with putting your feet up? This is due to long standing hours at workplace, you may say. True, it is due to that. But, it is not something to be left unattended. Calf pains are due to deep vein thrombosis that occurs when the stagnated blood in the veins starts to form clots. The danger here is that the clot could break off and travel to your lungs causing pulmonary thromboembolism that is fatal! Take a break regularly and put up your feet frequently. Let the blood flow and not stagnate! Pain in the back: Most commonly, back pain is caused due to arthritis, and improper sitting postures. But if you suffer from high blood pressure, and are an alcoholic and smoker too, do not take your back pain lightly. It could be due to a heart attack or an aortic dissection! Pain in the abdomen: You may attribute this pain to gases, over eating or indigestion. While these may be occasional causes, persistent pains need to be checked. It could be anything from a gall stone, to gastric ulcers, to a swollen liver, or maybe even pancreatic cancer! Vague, medically inexplicable pains: When you have a recurrent headache or a stomach ache or a backache and you come out with a 'perfectly healthy' report after visiting all the specialists, it is perhaps time to seek the help of a psychiatrist or a counsellor. Your pains could actually be a symptom of depression. Psychosomatic pains are on the rise. The stresses we face in our lives everyday get pushed to our subconscious, and eventually are pushed up bodily in the form of unexplained aches and pains!
Sex after 40Sexual changes in normal aging after 40: Erection takes longer time Require manual stimulation, particularly by partner Erection may subside during foreplay or coitus Decreased frequency of nocturnal erection Pre-ejaculatory fluid decrease or absent Ejaculation less forceful Seminal fluid volume decreases or absent Frequency of desire for sexual release decreases with age. Aged couples learn to cope with their own sexuality. Some are happy with foreplay and self masturbation, others insist on more usually it is the male. Frequency of sexual intercourse between 20-95 years : Sexual intercourse decreases with age as the study shows. Decreased during 5year interval after 34 years Weekly frequency: 30 - 34 years 2.2%; 60 - 64 years 0.7%; 65  - 74 years 0.4%; 75 - 79 years 0.3% Do we need to change this pattern with Viagra? I would say yes - sex can be  joyful till the last days. Nobody needs to be impotent now. Home devices like rubber bands, ribbons are also used to hold the blood back in the penis when the erection is not adequate. Vacuum pump to draw blood into penis with an application of a ring after erection is also found suitable by some. Active intervention by drugs (both allopathy, ayurvedic and unani) have been successfully developed. They may be applied topically (minidoxil), inhaled (amyl nitrate) inserted into the urethral passage, injected into the corpus cavernosa or taken orally (Sildenafil, Tadalafil, etc.). Finally if all fails silastic rods can be implanted in the penis to give permanent erection. The joy of living lasts a life time.
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