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Sunshine for busy executivesMost people working in corporate offices, spend long hours within the confines of concrete buildings. Some business sectors like IT and manufacturing even have their employees working in night shifts. What we don't realize is that, in such a setup, our bodies do not get adequate dosage of sunlight. Lack of exposure to sunlight is responsible for a range of diseases and health conditions. The body requires sunlight just as much it requires food for its nourishment. Long hours of work in glazed business buildings under artificial lighting, deprive the body of this most basic need, thereby creating a deficiency of the vitamin D group. This deficiency then goes on to create several imbalances in the body, and contributes to diseases. Besides these, Vitamin D deficiency can also cause general muscle weakness, muscle and bone aches and pains and osteoporosis, due to the inability to utilize calcium. The best source of Vitamin D is natural sunshine, and that's why it is called the sunshine vitamin. Vitamin D can be had in the supplement form too, but it is still no match for natural sunlight. In a paper titled 'Vitamin D Deficiency' published in The New England Journal, M F Holick writes that, arms and legs should get exposure to sun for 10-15 minutes every day. "The amount of vitamin D produced depends on the intensity of the UVB in the sun and many other factors. Darker-skinned individuals may need 5-10 times more exposure than a fair-skinned person, in order to make the same amount of vitamin D." Tap that sunlight Early morning is the best time to get out in the sun. There's no better time to get that walk, than in the morning. Park your car a little away from the office building if possible, and walk to your office in the sun. When you take a tea break in the evening, head outside, instead of going to the in-house cafeteria.
Career advice for menGetting a job these days is extremely difficult. What is even more difficult is sticking around long enough at the job. No one is indispensable, and if you don't perform well, there are hundreds more waiting to get the job! Being the bread winner, men have to face this pressure more. Here are some tips that would do you good, if followed: Cracking The Interview: The golden rule here is to be honest. The interviewers do not want to hear what will please them; So, do not try to butter them up. They are also put off by boasting . Therefore, be honest about your views and opinions. Age:wise Attitude- When you are young, and have just entered the company, it is highly advisable to observe and learn as much as you can. Find yourself a professional mentor who can guide you. Try and build on your professional presence. Be active, spend more time with your boss, be helpful to your juniors. The golden advice for all, irrespective of seniority, is to stay clear of office gossip and politics. Keep a check on the attitude: There is no need to be arrogant, and a know-it-all. Be friendly, confident, and genuine. Learn to say no: You need to have a pleasing personality. But, avoid trying to please all. Try and learn the art of saying no firmly. Too much of 'yes' will make people take you for granted, and you will find yourself overloaded with a lot of work. Do not under price yourself: If you feel that you deserve a raise, go ahead and ask for it. Do not be afraid to ask for your worth. Often at interviews, employers cancel out candidates who under price themselves, as it shows that they will probably not perform to the expected levels. Blow your trumpet: With all humility make sure you take what is rightfully yours. If you don't take credit for the work, no one will give it to you. Worse, someone else may take it! Create boundaries: Keep your work at office. Do not bring work home. Often at the outset, to please bosses, one ends up working overtime or worse, working at home. It is important to keep both the parts of your lives separate. Keep fit too: Don't let your job take a toll on your health. Working late, sitting at the same place for hours, can be harmful for the heart. Learn to unwind periodically. Setting goals is easy. What is needed is the determination to follow the rules you have set for yourself. The way to success at work is taking the ladder, one step at a time. There is no elevator here.
Perfect partners in crime - Midlife crisis and dementiaThe responses we have to common stressful events in our daily lives have a lasting impact on our brain structure. The effects of a stressful event last a very long time, though apparently we seem to have recovered from it. Researchers say that the stress hormones keep circulating in our body long after the stress has passed. According to a recent Swedish research study, our response to common life events may trigger long-lasting physiological changes in the brain. These interestingly shocking findings come from the Prospective Population Study of Women in Gothenburg, a long term study on 800 women that lasted for almost forty years. The women who were a part of this study were all born before 1930, and underwent regular neuropsychiatric tests. The study started in 1968 assessed women for any baseline stressors like workplace problems, widowhood, alcoholism and illness in the family. Women who had serious issues at the start of the study had a 21% higher risk of developing Alzheimer's Disease and 15% higher risk of developing dementia later on in life. Interestingly, having to take care of a mentally ill family member like a sibling or mother, was found to be a major cause for development of dementia later on in life. The findings of this study show that accumulated stress from common life events has severe physiological and psychological consequences. These physiological consequences include adverse effects on the central nervous, cardiovascular and endocrine and immune systems. There have been several studies that state that the effects of stressful events like earthquakes, cyclones and floods can have a lasting impact on life and often shape the person's personality. What makes this study interesting is its finding that daily stressors accumulated over a period of time and often left unresolved, have a lasting impact that shows up in later stages of life!
10 pregnancy risk factors that every pregnant woman should be aware ofFollowing are the possible risk factors for pregnant women: Hypertension: Blood pressure rises during pregnancy due to changes in osmotic level. Persistent high blood pressure leads to a condition called as pre-eclampsia. It retards the growth of the baby in the womb and can even result into death of foetus. It can lead to convulsions in mother. Exposure to medicines and drugs: Self medication is a strict NO NO during pregnancy. Certain drugs have harmful effect on the growth and development of baby. Take gynaecologist's opinion and ask a doctor before taking any medication.  Smoking: Smoking retards the growth of foetus (baby in womb). Moms who indulge in smoking give birth to babies with a very low birth weight. It also increases chances of miscarriage. Mother's weight: It is important to make sure that there is a steady weight gain during pregnancy. A weight gain of 11 kilograms is expected over a period of 9 months. Watch for a steady weight gain for a healthy pregnancy sake. Anaemia: There is an increase in blood volume during pregnancy. This can cause the iron levels to drop down resulting in anaemia. Haemorrhoids add further to the iron loss. Iron and folic acid are therefore prescribed. Haemorrhoids: Haemorrhoids are common during pregnancy and after pregnancy due to constipation which is because of hormone induced reduced motility of intestine. The pressure of gravid uterus on intestine may also cause it. Increased consumption of green leafy vegetables and laxative would relieve it. Alcohol: Drinking can cause a harmful effect on the growth and nourishment of child. Child may be born with a serious medical problem. Sexual intercourse: It's strictly not advised during last trimester. Radiation exposure: Exposure to radiotherapy or chemicals in the surrounding should be avoided. Bleeding per vagina: Consult your gynaecologist soon, if you have problem of bleeding per vagina. It could be a sign of abortion.  
Dehydration: Prevention and curePlaying outside is great for the child's physical as well mental development. But if your child has spent the entire day outside and comes back with fever, diarrhea, or vomiting, and is sweating a lot, then watch out for the signs of dehydration. What is dehydration? Dehydration means abnormal loss of water from the body, especially from illness or physical exertion. Under normal conditions we all lose some body water through sweat, urine, and tears. Kids lose large amount of water and salt from body during fever, diarrhoea, vomiting, or long hours of physical activity or exercise without any water intake. How do I know it is dehydration? If your child has any of the fever, diarrhoea, vomiting or is sweating a lot on hot days then watch for these signs: Sunken eyes Dry or sticky mouth Dark urine or lack of urine output Tiredness, lethargy, irritability or fatigue How can I prevent dehydration? The best way to prevent dehydration is to ensure the child drinks plenty of fluids when they are sick or physically active. Get your kid in the habit of drinking enough water before he/she even feels thirsty.If it is very hot, explain to the kids the benefits of drinking water frequently. If possible, avoid going out in the sun. Give your kids a well-balanced meal to be sure that they are getting all the adequate nutrients. What if my kid gets dehydrated? If the kid is below 1 year, care should be taken to breast feed the baby often. If the dehydration is due to vomiting, feed small amounts frequently for it to absorb in between the vomiting episodes. Give a spoonful of ORS solution every 10 minutes to replace the lost fluids. For kids above 1 year, start with plain water initially when the kid complains of thirst. Later the kids may need drinks containing sugar and electrolytes. Also, the child should be made to rest at home in a cool environment until the lost fluid has been replaced. Once the child is rehydrated, resume to normal routine and diet.
Get the couch potato out to playKids in the modern day are increasingly getting lazier and unfit. Watching TV, playing games on consoles and smartphones, and spending time on social networks is eating into time which would otherwise be spent playing outdoors.The lack of exercise comes with a host of problems, which can affect kids in childhood or later on in life. Therefore, parents must encourage kids to exercise by being an example. However, do keep in mind that there is nothing that will bore a kid than treadmills or lifting weights. Playing sports is often the better way to go. Give aerobics a try Aerobic exercises can help kids to stay fit and also can be fun at the same time. The common perception is that aerobics involve dancing a set pattern. However, aerobics is any exercise that increases your oxygen intake. Outdoor activities can include basketball, cycling, soccer, swimming, tennis, walking or running Along with aerobics, children should also do stretching exercises, which help in improving flexibility, allowing muscles and joints to bend and move easily through their full range of motion. Getting your kids excited It is important, however, to communicate with your child the need to exercise. You could encourage them to take part in outdoor games at school as well as in the locality where you stay. You should regulate the number of hours your kid can spend in front of the TV or PC. This way she will look for means to play outside the house. You can also play with them yourself. It will be fun for the both of you, as well as helps you bond with your child. Exercising for at least an hour a day is ideal, and it broken down into chunks of 15 minutes at a time.  
Causes and treatment of sleep talkingIt is usually believed that sleep talking is associated with dreaming, but there is no scientific evidence available to support this hypothesis. In few cases, it may be associated with sleep disorders or any other diseases. Sleep terrors and REM sleep behavior disorder (RBD) are two sleep disorders associated with sleep talking. Sleep terrors are associated with frightening scream, kicking, and thrashing. It is commonly seen in children. Awakening becomes difficult during sleep terror. Patients with RBD utter a sudden loud cry, grunt, shout, or act out their dreams, usually violently. Other causative factors of sleep walking are emotional stress, mental health illnesses, substance abuse, fever, and certain medications. Treatment: Evaluation of the patient Patients with sleep talking should be evaluated by a specialist doctor especially if it is seen in adults or associated with violent actions, screaming, or intense fear. If children with sleep talking have disturbed sleep pattern, they should be evaluated by the pediatrician. The doctor asks questions to the parents, roommates, and bed partners about the nature and the extent of sleep talking. There is no definitive treatment available for sleep talking, although the doctor may test to record the sleep pattern of the patient to identify any sleep disorder. This test is known as polysomnogram. Management Sleep talking usually does not require treatment. Avoidance of stress and plenty of sleep at night may help to decrease sleep talking. However if any sleep disorder is identified by polysomnogram, it is treated accordingly by the doctor. If underlying causes like mental illnesses, substance abuse, or medications are identified, they are also managed accordingly. Mental illnesses like depression should be treated with proper counseling and medications. The patients should refrain from alcohol, heavy meals, fatty meals, etc. The patients are advised to follow regular sleep schedule, get adequate amount of sleep, and practice proper sleep hygiene so that severity and frequency of sleep talking is decreased.
Sweetie, I am addicted to you!Research shows sugar can be more addictive than heroin. What was the last thing you ate or drank before reading this? Bread? Banana? Chocolate? Cake? Fries? Wafers? Doughnut? Biscuits? Soda? Juice? Wine? Vodka? Coffee? Tea? They are all sugars ultimately. Some taste sweet, some don't. The first thing we taste as babies is milk. It is naturally sweet. From that young age, we learn that sugar is what we like and what we want. You may be a sugar addict, if: You need 'something sweet' after every meal. You cannot have tea or coffee without that second pinch of sugar. Dessert is a must every time you eat out. You go hunting to the refrigerator looking for cake leftovers. A little bite of that chocolate bar is all you need to be happy. You are the one who finishes off the last piece of laddu in the house. You want ketchup with everything - fries, noodles, pizza, burger, samosa, kachori. You want all the above listed items because you just read their names. When out in the hot sun, water is not sufficient for you, you want flavored sweetened chilled drinks. A mocktail or a soda drink makes your dinner complete. And many more such things. So, you see, almost all of us are sugar addicts. Studies show every person in countries like, USA, UK and Australia, may be a sugar addict. The reasons behind the sugar addiction are manifold. First, beyond doubt sugar tastes awesome. Taste factor cannot be debated with. But do you know, the taste is conditioned? Cravings are not always and entirely natural. They are a result of what you give the body and teach your taste buds. Second, businesses heavily exploit this weakness for sugar. Wherever you go there is unimaginable variety of sugar products. A café, a restaurant, a general store, a superstore, a street cart - they all have several options for you to indulge in. How much can one resist and how much can on filter the menu! Third, sugar creates instant gratification. That does work for it and that does add to our trouble. A sad day at work and some chocolate perks you up. Feeling dull and bored, let's go out for an ice cream. This happens too often. Why sugar isn't that sweet? We feel what harm can little sweet do, being happy is more important. However, sugar is worse than many other food vices. As an experiment, check the contents of everything in your kitchen and count how many of them have sugar, in any amounts. Try skipping everything that has sugar in it for the next three days. You will be shocked. The options to eat cut down to several degrees if you skip sugar. The problem with sugar is it makes you want more. A bit does not satisfy you. Sugar increases the desire for sugar - immediate and long term, likewise. The moment you have a bite of something sweet, you cannot stop there, you need to eat another bite, and another, and another. In the long run, your taste buds are getting deeply conditioned for sugar cravings. Your body learns that every time the mind is feeling low, it should ask for sugar. That is how it has been taught to feel better. You are entering a vicious cycle when you entertain these cravings. Sugar is often defamed as a white poison. It is not an exaggeration. Sugar has no nutritive value, apart from generating energy in the body. It simply increases the risk of numerous health complications. Sugar is a known culprit for diabetes mellitus, obesity, heart disease, hormonal imbalance, sexual dysfunctions, and others. Sugar addiction is the most common addiction of all. It is difficult to leave sugar completely out, but one can always cut the portions. How to beat that addiction? Time for some action? All this information must be making you want to cut down on your sugar intake. Hold on. Alcohol, smoking, drugs - they are understood and accepted as addictions. So, there are support groups, people around us will motivate and help us to de-addict. Getting rid of our sugar addiction is even tougher. It will require tremendous amount of will power and determination. Are you ready for the challenge? Let us see some simple ways to de-addict from sugars: Drink less Cut down on all the artificially sweetened drinks - colas, orange, iced teas, flavored canned drinks, sodas. They have zero health benefit. The only reason why you have them is because of the taste factor. Remember the taste is momentary. Once inside the body, these drinks are creating havoc for your system. One spoon less - Tea or coffee? What do you need to start your day? Whatever it is, try reducing the sugar portions. If you take two spoons, try one. If you take one spoon, try half. It will be difficult in the beginning but eventually you will get used to it and you will even like it. Have whole fruits instead of juices. Anything drinkable in the cans contains sugar. Say no to cans. Eat less Give the ketchup bottles some rest. Decide your weekly chocolate quota. Don't let the moods overpower your decision. Bakery items are loaded with sugar, forget they exist. Turn a blind eye to that shelf when you go grocery shopping. A fan of breakfast cereal? Check the packets for sugar content. The ones that are flavoured have more sugar. Pick the plain ones. You can add your own choice of fruit and dry fruits for nutrition. Desserts should be a onetime thing, only when the occasion calls for it. You don't need them daily. Let the sweetness be in your words, not on your plate.
Aerobics: dancing your way to healthAerobic exercise is any comprehensive activity that makes you breathe hard while exercising your large muscle groups at a standard, even pace. The body uses stored carbohydrates and fats for energy. What is aerobics? Aerobic literally means having or providing oxygen or an activity that takes place only in the presence of oxygen. What is aerobic exercise? Aerobic exercise is any comprehensive activity that makes you breathe hard while exercising your large muscle groups at a standard, even pace. The body burns stored carbohydrates and fats for energy. Thus aerobic exercises help the body to utilize oxygen efficiently with increase in respiration and heart rate. What are the best ways to do aerobic exercises? There are number of ways by which you can exercise aerobically. Some easy and best ways are: walking, running, biking, using stationary bike, using stair stepper, elliptical machines or rowing machines, or joining an aerobic exercise class Benefits of aerobic exercises Fat reduction: Aerobics burns calories and body fats directly while using oxygen to produce energy. So this is the healthiest way to get rid of extra fat.  Strong heart: Aerobic exercises not only use your larger muscle groups like hamstrings, but also strengthen the heart muscles. This improves heart function resulting in improvement of blood and oxygen supply to all body parts, which provides healthy nourishment to body cell and removes toxins. Improves breathing: Exercises improve your lung capacity and function,which improves oxygenation, or competence of respiratory system to deliver oxygen to all body parts. It also improves overall health of the respiratory system. Cholesterol control: LDL cholesterol is bad cholesterol mostly responsible for clogging of arteries and HDL is good cholesterol. Aerobic exercises invariable increase the amount of HDL and lower LDL cholesterol thus preventing fat deposition and plaque formation and maintaining optimal blood supply to heart. Other benefits: Aerobics is the best exercise when it comes to prevention of various diseases like hypertension, diabetes, stroke and arthritis and osteoporosis. It helps to keep mood elevated and cures depression and boosts immunity. Make sure to incorporate some form of aerobic exercise in your daily routine.  
4 super foods to keep you healthy this winterWinter is here. It is time for lazy mornings and blanket hideouts. It is also the time when the markets are lined up with a variety of fresh fruits and vegetables, all juicy, healthy and colorful. Discover four such super foods for the cold winter evenings. Citrus fruits: Oranges, sweet lime, lemons; bring them all and have them all. Bright yellow or orange, they are like the bright sunny mornings which you need after a cold night. Rich in vitamin C, antioxidants, flavonoids and several other nutrients, citrus fruits are the perfect measure for your daily dose. Peel it off and chew it up, or slice it off and lick it on, or squeeze it strong and drink it down - choose the way you like. Citrus fruits help in taking care of your cholesterol, as well. Potatoes: Potatoes are the victims of most diet plans. It is loaded with carbohydrates, we should not eat potato, and so on and so forth. Potato is not that bad actually. In fact, its nutritional value may come as a surprise to many. The content of vitamins B6, C and folate is high in potatoes. Potatoes are rich in essential minerals like potassium, zinc and magnesium. The starch content may be significant, but so is the fiber content. They are known to protect against colon cancer. What are you waiting for? Have some potatoes, will you? Make sure there is no guilt. Kidney Beans: Kidney bean is our favorite Indian 'Rajma'. They are a rich source of carbohydrates and proteins, are known to lower the cholesterol levels and reduce the risk of heart disease. They are particularly known for helping to replenish the iron stores of your body. It can be the food of choice even if you have diabetes, as it is almost fat-free and doesn't send a sudden rush of glucose in the blood. When combined with rice, kidney beans make a very healthy meal. So, is it rajma-chawal (kidney beans with rice) for dinner today? Green leaves: Yes, yes, you are bored of reading and listening to the benefits of green leafy vegetables. But, we have to remind you, for the advantages are too many to be ignored. They are the greenest, freshest and leafiest in the winters. Even if you are not a fan, you will feel like picking up a bunch from the grocery store. Spinach (palak), fenugreek (methi), cabbage (gobhi) are the ones that we can commonly find. Others to look for are lettuce, mustard greens, etc. The green leaves are a rich source of a variety of vitamins, mineral, fiber and water content. They are suitable for all ages and can be easily digested. Entertain that potato lying in your kitchen, cook up a dish with the green leafy ones. Alternatively, you could try it in the form of salads, soups, juices, flour fillings, and any other creative ideas that you chefs have.  
MigraineA Severely painful persistent headache can put anyone in distress. Migraine symptoms vary from person to person. Some people get intimation before the pain begins. It can be sparkling flashes of light, blind spots, or distortions. Some others experience tingling or "pins-and-needles" sensation in hands or face. This is called an aura. The headache begins within 30 minutes of seeing an aura and may last for 4 to 72 hours. Extreme sensitivity to light, noise, smells, nausea and vomiting, loss of appetite and fatigue, numbness, tingling, or weakness are all-common in migraine. There is no permanent solution to migraines. People suffer for years together and keep on taking painkillers for a long time. Pain killer helps only if taken right at the beginning of the headache. Keep a watch on things that trigger the migraine and try to avoid them. Make some lifestyle changes that can help prevent migraines to some extent. Taking good sleep. Lack of sleep can cause migraine. Appropriate hours of sleep as a routine will help to prevent the attacks. Regular meals at fixed time help to prevent migraines in people who get headaches due to hunger or not eating on time. Regular exercises help to rejuvenate the body and prevent migraines along with many other diseases. Stress is another important cause for migraines. Avoid stress. Learning to manage it will keep migraine at bay. Caffeine triggers migraine in many. Avoid caffeine. Reduce it if quitting is not possible. Limiting alcohol will again be very beneficial as alcohol and hangovers can be the cause. Meditation and relaxation therapies may also help prevent migraine headaches.  
Know your safe period for low-risk sexNot every act of sexual intercourse will result in pregnancy. There are days when your chances of conception are very high and days when the chances are almost nil. Know these days to help you enjoy a rocking sex life! The menstrual cycle starts from the day the bleeding starts and ends about 28 days after that, on an average ovulation occurs around 14th day of the menstrual cycle. The 14th day is the ideal day theoretically. Since every woman's menstrual cycle differs, the day of the ovulation also differs. Hence doctors calculate the fertile period as the 12th day to the 18th day of the menstrual cycle. This is the period when the chances of ovulating and hence getting pregnant are very high. The 1st to the 7th day and the 19th day to the start of the next cycle are the days when the ovulation chances are very less. This means if you make love during these days, there are very less chances of getting pregnant. This is the case with women who have regular period cycles. In case the cycles are irregular, then you would need to do a bit of math for calculating the safe period. For example, if your shortest cycle is of 26 days and the longest cycle has been of 31 days, then- 26-18= 8 and 31-10=21 The 8th day to the 21st day are the fertile days; 1st day to the 7th day and then the 21st day until the day the next cycle starts are the days that are safe to enjoy sex without fear of getting pregnant. Opting to have sex during the 'safe period' isn't fool-proof though. A lot of women have irregular cycles and the cycle length can vary from women to women. That's why the so-called 'safe period' is, in truth, not that safe! And it's better to use condoms or other contraceptive methods like the oral pill to prevent unwanted pregnancies.
How to talk about STDsThese are dangerous times that we live in. Just the sheer number of people affected by sex related problems, diseases and conditions all over the world is simply terrifying. AIDS, venereal infections like syphilis and gonorrhea, herpes, HPV etc. are rampant and it calls for some responsible sexual behavior. However, that's a utopian world where humans will be monogamous and will behave responsibly. Even single people might get exposed to these diseases through indulging in risky sexual contact. Imagine doling out $750,000, as a woman in the US got from her husband because he gave her herpes. Even if you are not held legally accountable, what about moral responsibility to own up and discuss a possible STD infection with your partner! Take the case of Jack a happily married man for ten years who had casual sex when out of town on an official trip. He showed no obvious symptoms of any infection but in a month, his wife showed signs of herpes and his marriage crumbled as his wife struggled to come to terms with her husband's obvious infidelity and his callous manner in exposing her to a serious sexual infection. Call it ignorance but sometimes a person might engage in sexual intercourse and contract a disease which he might even not be aware of until the symptoms start appearing. (Refer article on Syphilis on www.topdoctorsonline.com) By then, he might have, in all probability, passed it on to his regular sexual partner or spouse. Or perhaps, there is another possibility that the person knows that he has contracted a sexual infection but doesn't know how to break the news to his partner.  If a person is aware of his infection, yet exposes another person knowingly, it is akin to premeditated murder. Yes, it is going to be a difficult thing to tell your partner which might even signal the end of the relationship or cause severe strain on it. So, if you are caught in a situation like this, what would you do? The option would be to visit a sex therapist and confide in him and then take an appointment for both and let the professional break it to the partner. That is of course if you are in a stable relationship. For those who both party to casual sex, the infected person generally won't be that open about his infection and may even choose not to care particularly if the other person is a complete stranger. A report in MedlinePlus news reveals some more shocking statistics: Many people said they occasionally, rarely or never got tested before having sex with casual partners (50 percent) or long-term partners (39 percent). Of the people who did discuss STD testing, very few discussed concurrent sexual partners or when partners' testing occurred in relation to their last sex act. Only half explained what types of STDs their partner had been tested for. These issues are important components of assessing STD risk, the researchers said. About one-third of participants reported telling a partner they didn't have an STD even though they hadn't been tested since their last sexual partner. One U.S. woman was awarded $750,000 in court from her ex-husband because he gave her herpes, and the legal trend is to make people accountable. (http://www.dummies.com/how-to/content/how-to-talk-to-a-partner-about-stds.html) Remember even wearing a condom is not a 100% guarantee that the infection won't pass on to the other person but that's the least that you can do if you don't have the courage to spill the beans about your condition. If you feel that your partner may be indulging in sexual activity with multiple partners and if you feel he might be infected, then you are well within your rights to decline to have sex with him until he/she gets tested. If you notice sores around the genitals do not indulge in oral or anal sex or any kind of sex and insist on a condom always; it could save your life.
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