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The moody man - Mood swings in menMen, such jokes on a woman's monthly mood swings are passe. Recent research proves that men are equally prone to have mood swings. Have you experienced a myriad of emotions? Angry, irritated, feeling helpless, self-pity, an irrational urge to throw things and cry and be depressed all at the same time? These are signs of mood swings. And the point of interest here is that you don't have to be a woman to experience mood swings. Men face their share of mood swings too! Men undergo hormonal influence too. And like women this causes them too to be irritable and cranky. The difference here is that the hormonal fluctuations are not as severe in men as in women. So the mood change lasts for a lesser time compared to a woman. Men's moods are also affected by psychological and physiological stressors. So a man who has to work against time to meet a deadline will be very irritable. A man who is deprived of sleep will end up snapping at you for no apparent reason. The myth that men don't cry, is something that men take to heart. Men are emotional beings and it is okay to show some of the emotions. The male stereotypical image is such that if a man is expressive of his emotional side, he isn't considered macho enough. Hence men tend to internalize their emotions and feelings. Often this leads to chronic depression. Taming the mood swings. Any form of physical exercise helps keep the mood in balance. This helps in keeping the aggressiveness under check. Sex is also a great way to release the stress and feel better, rather than snapping and using profanities. Another helpful way is to ask yourself 'why'. Whenever you feel that you are doing something irrational or out of character, ask yourself why. The answer you get from yourself will help clear the situation and you will end up handling it in a mature fashion. The irritable male syndrome. This is the male equivalent of the female menopause - The Andropause. It covers the symptoms seen in middle-aged men that occur due to the drop in testosterone levels. Like women, men show mood changes, bouts of irritability, grumpiness, hypersensitivity, anxiety and frustration. The recent research on men having mood swings and the society's acceptance of these findings is very encouraging. It helps stress in the fact that men are emotional too. There is nothing anti-macho about a man crying his heart out at times. It only shows he is human, after all.
Aging milestonesChanges in old age depends on attitude as much as person to person. In young old age some changes begin to take place in a person’s appearance. Wrinkles, warts, age spots begin to form on the body. Hair begins to thin or becomes grey and even height lessens because the bone density decreases. While in ‘old‘ old age these changes are already permanent. Men might look distinguished if in good health, but women all look grandmotherly. In ‘young’ old age, cells begin to decay and muscle mass declines and immunity is no longer as strong as it used to be. People lose energy as the age progresses.  ‘Old’ old age brings in a lot of physical decline, profound changes in appearance and motor abilities, as also in sensation. Skin gets less elastic and becomes thin and blood vessels can break under the skin. The senses also begin to become dull. Eye lenses get affected and color perception and reading ability becomes very low. Hearing loss may lead to paranoia and ‘old’ old age people begin to think everyone is plotting against them because they can’t hear properly about what others are saying. Sense of smell also declines, but the taste remains almost intact. In ‘young’ old age, reflexes also slow down and so do the motor abilities. By the time they reach ‘old‘ old age most adults find that their response time has become quite reduced. This can be seen most in driving situations where it is difficult for ‘old‘ old aged adults to operate their vehicles as they have poor spontaneous responses. The ‘young’ old adults do not lose as much of their motor abilities as the ‘old‘ old adults, especially when holding small things like needles and pins. Of course, there are changes in sexuality and there may be a decline in the ability to have sex as men may not have an erection and women become dry due to lack of female hormones. Cognitive decline in 40% to 60% of older adults can be arrested with remedial training. Despite all the changes, most people even in their 70s remain comparatively active if they do not suffer any illness. Mental, physical, and social activity is necessary to maintain the quality of life. Old people begin to withdraw from work and other important roles and allow the younger people to take over. They are a lot happier as is also advised in Vedic literature as vridhashram. While activities are important, disengagement is equally important. Memory loss becomes aggravated and other cognitive abilities begin to decline and there are many ‘old‘ old adults who get Alzheimer’s and lose the ability to look after themselves. Old people also dwell on questions of death and sometimes go through a phase of denial and then anger that they have so little time left. Acceptance of death comes, but after a struggle and the idea of losing the family saddens them. Old people require support in their declining years as they begin to lose their faculties.
Inspiring fitness goals for womenBeing fit comes with the benefit of enhanced mood and lowered hormonal rages. Coupled with right proportion of sleep, hydration, and a job you love, you will be nearing towards a perfect body. Goal 1: WorkOut Your Body to A Song! Make a playlist of all the songs you love and choose to execute your regime through it. Goal 2: "Be Yourself" Challenge Holistically develop your body by acknowledging what you love to do. Choose a sport that you love and join a group. If you love animals, then walk your dog which will let you lose weight and enjoy the company of pets. If painting or photography interests you, then trekking along landscapes of beauty should be your weekend getaway. Goal 3: Become the Hourglass with 1-Month Workout Regime Evaluate your body type and create a month-long regime to gradually progress towards animpeccable body shape and continue it beyond the initial 1 month. Start with small steps and do not go in for crash diets. Choose healthier snacks. Add a bit ofsleep to your daily dose in case you tend to sleep less. Begin with 15minutes of workout containing exercises recommended by your trainer to suit your body. Goal 4: Be the Health-Smart Mom! Lose the extra pounds you brought on during pregnancy and set a role model for your children. Go to the park with your children and play games with them. Pick up sports that you all can share and do together! Goal 5: The Yoga Guru Pick up yoga and start from the first step. Did you know that the initiation of anyone into the system of Yoga occurs through stage of Yama? Yama refers to the ethical principles that will guide your life while you move towards taking control of your life. The five Yamasin yoga are non-violence, truthfulness, non-stealing, celibacy, and non-possessiveness. They form the ground for your body to start on a healthy path. Move yourself towards following these principles and pick up the following asanas (body-postures) to lose weight: setu band (the bridge pose), bhekasana, dhanurasana, shalabhasana, chakki chalan, nauka chalan, and sarvangasana. A healthy lifestyle is the framework for any fitness goal. Do not go for unrealistic or transient goals. Start by making preparatory changes in your lifestyle: Lower your junk food intake, sleep adequately, drink at least two liters of water daily and hydrate your body sufficiently. Goal 6: Going Back to Nature Plan a trekking trip to your dream destination and walk your fat away. Bring back home a healthier body and a more peaceful mind. Goal 7: Master Your Body Make a journal of all activities you do in a day. The intention is to become aware of your habits that might be hurting your body unknowingly. Trace habits like binging on a snack while watching TV, sitting in a bad posture while on the desk and reading a book at a dimly lit place may be few pointers. This is a long-term challenge (4 months) to bring your body under your control through self-awareness. Goal 8: Green Regime Go for a diet which involves vegetables, fruits, and grains. Detoxify your body by being off junk food for at least two months. Goal 9: Bony to Healthy Increase your weight to become the inspiration for underweight people and guide them towards a healthy body. Goal 10: Run for the World Join marathons and runs for different social causes. Commonly known as 'Run for a Cause,' be the torchbearer to a certain cause by joining organizations that work on the same and initiating a run or marathon. This will not only prepare your body and move it towards healthy living; you will also be doing your part for the others.
Just how sporty is your sports bra?Very few women in the world really know the right size of their bra and end up using wrong size bra all their life. A study shows that all over the world only 2 women out of 10 wear the right sized bra due to which they can never get the look they want. Since there is lot of difference in sports bra of different brands, you need time and patience to find out the most suitable one for you. You should keep on measuring yourself every year, and especially if you have added weight or lost weight. It is also necessary to check your bra-size after pregnancy.  On an average, the size of sports bra range from A to H and most women find a comfortable fit among either of this size. A good sports bra should always offer three things- support, comfort and breathability to the breasts. Choosing a Bra with a Good Fit Most of the elite bra shops offer good range of different sports bra. But it is important to know which one suits you or is of your size. A well fitting bra gives you the liberty to exercise or move with confidence and comfort. One thing you should keep in mind while purchasing a sports bra is your life style and preferences. Some like it padded, some like it embroidered, while some may like it simple. So apart from correct measurements, your style should be given preference while buying a sports bra. Moreover, you also should take into consideration the dress you are wearing on this bra. Here are some tips that can help you in selecting the right bra when you will go to the lingerie shop. Support   A good bra should offer your breast complete support, irrespective of whether they are small, medium or even big. If you have breasts ranging in between A to C cup, you should choose a compression bra that offers more comfort and support. If you are looking for a bra that also encapsulates and gives proper shape to your breasts then you should choose a bra accordingly. These bras offer more support than the compression bra. For getting both comfort and support, you can choose a compression bra that also encapsulates your breasts properly. Comfort You should feel comfortable when you wear a bra. It should stay in place and should not chafe. If possible, try one of the samples in the changing room and check whether the straps dig into your shoulders or whether the bands provide comfortable support to the breasts. The bra should hold the breasts comfortably without being restrictive. A good bra is one that holds your breasts in place even when you are performing all the jumping, running and swinging acts. Breathability The fabric of the sports bra should be good enough to wick away the sweat from the skin so that it dries quickly and allows the skin to breathe properly. The bra should allow excess heat and perspiration to pass through the fabric keeping you dry and cool during summer &  warm and dry during winter.  
Your child is ready for school... but are you?It was still okay. Just 2-3 hours which you could utilize for other things while your child was away briefly. Now you will have to compete along with teachers, textbooks and homework for your child's attention. Well Mother, we know this is going to be difficult for you, but let's see if we can try and make it any easier. Think of school as an extension of the tender loving care that you provided. The only difference is that the TLC will go towards nurturing and developing his/her brain and help it learn important skills which will help gain a balanced development. At this point your child feels bad and completely unsafe in this new hostile world of teachers and uniforms and what not! If you weaken at this point your child will cop on and then will come the emotional blackmail. So explain the importance of school to your child as it will make the transition easier. It is always good for mothers to accompany their children to school but imagine watching mother walk away and all hell can break loose. So if your child's school has a school bus facility you can walk him to the bus stop and then say your goodbyes there. A lump in the throat at the bus stop is preferable any day than a scene at school with a child holding on to mother for dear life. Do not criticize your child's school or assignments given by them as children can catch on quite quickly and that can be reason enough for them not to concentrate on school activities. Always encourage your child to talk about what he did at school and ask him questions about his friends and teachers. This gives the impression that school is as important as home and gradually even you will reconcile yourself to the fact that school is here to stay.
Get the couch potato out to playKids in the modern day are increasingly getting lazier and unfit. Watching TV, playing games on consoles and smartphones, and spending time on social networks is eating into time which would otherwise be spent playing outdoors.The lack of exercise comes with a host of problems, which can affect kids in childhood or later on in life. Therefore, parents must encourage kids to exercise by being an example. However, do keep in mind that there is nothing that will bore a kid than treadmills or lifting weights. Playing sports is often the better way to go. Give aerobics a try Aerobic exercises can help kids to stay fit and also can be fun at the same time. The common perception is that aerobics involve dancing a set pattern. However, aerobics is any exercise that increases your oxygen intake. Outdoor activities can include basketball, cycling, soccer, swimming, tennis, walking or running Along with aerobics, children should also do stretching exercises, which help in improving flexibility, allowing muscles and joints to bend and move easily through their full range of motion. Getting your kids excited It is important, however, to communicate with your child the need to exercise. You could encourage them to take part in outdoor games at school as well as in the locality where you stay. You should regulate the number of hours your kid can spend in front of the TV or PC. This way she will look for means to play outside the house. You can also play with them yourself. It will be fun for the both of you, as well as helps you bond with your child. Exercising for at least an hour a day is ideal, and it broken down into chunks of 15 minutes at a time.  
Afraid of the dark? understand your fear and cure it!Scotophobia, more commonly known as Nycotophobia, is a psychological illness, where the patient is afraid of the dark. Children are more prone to this fear, though it does affect quite a few adults as well. The dark often represents insecurity and uncertainty to children, and it symbolizes their entrance into an unknown territory. If the children are alone during their first few encounters with darkness, the absence of parents (who exemplify safety), tends to amplify this crippling fear. While most of us do actually possess this fear in relatively small amounts, as we grow up the fear diminishes. However, there are those of us who might carry this fear of the dark into their adulthood and in such cases, the fear is usually accompanied by quite a few intricate issues. People often tend to externalize a set of conflicting feelings about a certain situation, towards something else. For instance, you might be worried about your children; but your mind may externalize this fear, via your inefficiency at work. This process is called externalization. So, when it comes to the root of your fear of darkness, it is possible that at some point in your past, you experienced something untoward, which through externalization, inculcated this fear of darkness, deep into your psyche. Evolutionary Ties to Darkness: Many scientists have pointed out that this phobia might be linked to the process of evolution. Since predators hunt for their prey at night, we might have inherited this fear of darkness from our ancestors, who believed that darkness was a space where they could be attacked by wild animals. However, recent studies have shown that  Scotophobia begins at approximately the age of two in children, and thus, it cannot be said to be innate to us. In a study done by Ryerson University involving over 90 students, it was found that people who are afraid of the dark, are more likely to be poor sleepers, than those who are not afraid of it. More interestingly, it was discovered that any kind of noise made while the people with this phobia were asleep, frightened them the most.. Symptoms of Scotophobia: The first symptoms of this fear are the resistance to visit dark places and the yearning for company when such situations arise. However, many a times adults who are suffering from this fear, do not reveal it due to the added fear of embarrassment and this, sometimes, results in outbursts of rage when they are forced to go out for an event at night, or to confront the dark under any such circumstances. A person battling this fear may experience panic attacks, sweating and trembling prior to, or while staying in the dark. The blood pressure also rises, accompanied by chest pain and lastly, a difficulty in breathing. Diagnosis of Scotophobia: In children, this fear can be easily verified by their behaviour. However, adults might require further assistance, due to their natural resistance to openly admit to such a fear. Scotophobia can be diagnosed through a comprehensive psychiatric evaluation. Following this, your psychologist would be able to give you an idea of the source of your fear as well. Pursue a course of treatment immediately after the discovery of the phobia, which will ensure a faster and more effective recovery. Treatment of Scotophobia: The process of 'desensitization' is most commonly used to help with such a phobia. In this form of treatment, the patient is slowly exposed to the object of fear, in a situation where she/he will not feel vulnerable. This is done by asking the patient to confront the dark along with another individual who symbolizes safety for him/her. This could be a parent or a friend. Night lights can also be installed to gradually reduce the fear. You may try certain breathing exercises, which will reduce the panic attacks that accompany this fear. Hypnosis has also been said to be very effective in dealing with this phobia. If your psychologist sees fit, you might be also prescribed some medicines; antidepressants are given in some cases. Joining a self-help group is also a good option, in addition to your psychological treatment.  
Accepting your flawsThere are basically two kinds of 'flaws,' one that is physical and the other that is in your personality. A physical 'flaw' like being too short, fat, or darkis never a person's fault. Thus accepting what you are can only boost your self-esteem and confidence. Despite these 'shortcomings,' it is your character and your achievements that stand out in the long run and not the way you look. The first step in creating a better life is accepting if you are wrong! Personality traits and habits are mostly visible to others but not to you. These are those faults that can cause bitterness in relationships or cause problems at work or in our social interactions. Some people lose their temper easily, some are lazy, and some are rude, while some are either introverts or extroverts. If you have flaws that can cause problems for others then the best thing you can do is to change those negative traits in yourself. Character flaws might be natural, but they can affect others negatively. The first thing in making improvements is to analyze yourself. What are you so angry about ? Is it really some other person's fault or that you have had a bad day at the office? Give it a thought and once you find the answers, you will feel relieved. Accept your physical flaws and love yourself for what you are, as this is the key to lasting happiness. Major flaws like alcoholism, splurging money, borrowing money, or addictions are what one should be willing to overcome. If you accept you have any of these major flaws and need help to overcome them, then you need to seek help. There are professionals who can help out, provided you are a willing party to the process. Improvement will come only if you are willing to change. Remember that flaws are easy to acknowledge and to change;the only thing required is the desire within you to do so.
10 bedtime beauty essentials! Here are the beauty essentials you need to take into consideration, before you hit the bed: Baby-soft soles :Before you sleep, apply Vaseline on the sole of your feet. This will adequately moisturize your soles and you can wake up to the great opportunity of wearing those heels you have been dying to try out! Healing the puffy eyes : If you are worried about waking up with puffy and tired eyes (even after 6 to 8 hours of sleep), then put on a little eye cream. You can also keep an extra pillow and make sure you sleep on your back. This will allow the fluids around your eyes to drain easily and reduce the puffiness. Trying out wavy hairstyle : Bedtime is the best time to work on your hairstyle. Before you sleep, shower and fashion your hair into the style you want. Apply a styling cream on your hair gradually, after having air-dried it. Now, decide if you would like to put them up in buns or braids. Stylize them into the pattern and wake up to wavy hair! Let your skin breathe : Those who are suffering from dry skin can apply moisturizer. A humidifier is also a great accessory for help in these cases. You can switch on the humidifier before you go to sleep. This will help your skin to retain its moisture through appropriate hydration. Keep aging at bay :Did you know that sleeping on cotton pillowcases can increase the chances of creases and wrinkles on your skin? Prevent wrinkles by using silk or satin bed clothing. This will also reduce hair breaking. Wake up, miss white smiles: If you want to take off the yellows from your teeth, then brush some baking soda and let them stay for about 8 minutes. Afterwards, thoroughly rinse your mouth. Do not perform this beauty tip more than once a week, it will negatively affect the structure of your enamel. Work on your complexion :During the day, sunlight might disable some face creams from working effectively on your complexion. Make the most use of night and apply a face cream containing retinal and vitamin C. Lengthen your lashes : Eye lashes depth and grace to your eyes. You might feel that working on your lashes will require way too much effort. But, much to your surprise, everything your lashes need is contained in a natural ingredient - castor oil. Consisting of Omega-3 fatty acids, which are highly hydrating, they will avoid your lashes from breaking and also strengthen them. Apply castor oil on your lashes before you sleep and watch them grow thick and healthy within a few weeks! Taking care of your hair : Skim leave-in conditioner through your hair in the evening and let them stay on till the morning. This will let them become soft and shiny. You can also use coconut oil as an alternate conditioner. Readying your nails for polish : Depending on the skin type, the nails of certain people become dry. If you are one of them, it would be best to apply a cuticle cream or oil on them before you sleep to wake up to polish-ready nails.
21 foods for a healthy heartFollowing is a list of heart-healthy food substances: Garlic: Did you ever think that the commonly available garlic in your kitchen can be heart healthy? It may be smelly for some, but for the heart it is a soothing substance. Garlic is known to control blood pressure, serum triglyceride level & cholesterol level. Carrot: Carrots, though taste sweet, have the ability to control blood sugar levels because of high level of antioxidants in them. So include carrots in your diet, especially in salads. Orange: This juicy fruit has cholesterol-lowering ability because of fibre pectin in it and also helps control blood pressure. Almonds: Though all nuts are believed to be nutritious, almonds are considered to be heart healthy. Almonds are rich in vitamin E, calcium, plant sterols, fibre and antioxidants. Almonds help in lowering LDL cholesterol and reducing risk of diabetes. Walnuts: Walnuts are rich in omega 3 fatty acids, monounsaturated fats which help in lowering cholesterol levels.  Oatmeal: Oats are very healthy & help in lowering the bad LDL cholesterol. You can have one bowl of oatmeal mixed in milk along with nuts as breakfast. Flaxseed: This honey coloured shiny seeds contain substances which are heart healthy, such as lignans, ALA and omega 3 fatty acids. It helps in lowering cholesterol level and controlling diabetes. Tofu: It is a type of soybean protein which can be replaced with paneer. Tofu is rich in fibre and polyunsaturated fats which prevent clogging of arteries.  Barley: The fibre in barley is believed to lower cholesterol and blood glucose levels.  Tuna fish: Tuna fish is rich in omega 3 fatty acids which helps in lowering cholesterol levels.  Salmon: It is very good for heart as it is rich in omega 3, EPA and DHA. It lowers and reduces the risk of inflammation in arteries. It is also believed to maintain the ratio of good cholesterol to bad cholesterol. Red wine: Red wine contains catechins and resveratrol, good for heart health.  Black beans: They are a rich source of magnesium which helps in lowering blood pressure. It also contains folate, antioxidants and fibre which is helpful in controlling blood sugar and cholesterol levels. Fresh herbs: If you are hypertensive and want to control your salt intake then try using fresh herbs as a substitute for salt. It also contains antioxidants which are good for heart. Herbs include rosemary, sage, oregano and thyme. Extra virgin olive oil: This is rich in heart-healthy polyphenols & monounsaturated fats. As it's very costly you can use it as a topping for bread or salad. Sweet potatoes: White potatoes are believed to increase glycemic index so you can replace them with sweet potatoes. It is heart healthy as it has low glycemic index and also contains fibre, vitamin A and lycopene. Low fat yoghurt: You can include this in your breakfast safely as it contains calcium & potassium which helps in lowering blood pressure. Dried cherries: They are rich in anthocyanins and antioxidants which help in neutralizing the action of enzymes which cause plaque formation. In winter you should opt for strawberries, blueberries for a healthy heart. Cayenne chili pepper: Your blood sugar normally increases post a meal. By sprinkling cayenne chili pepper over your food can help preventing insulin level spike post meals. Hot cocoa: Coffee helps in patients with type 2 diabetes. Hot cocoa contains antioxidants helpful for heart. Kosher salt:  This is very beneficial for heart patients as it contains half the amount of sodium as compared to table salt and thus helps in controlling high blood pressure.
Stay healthy, keep flu at bayKeep the influenza virus away from you by following these simple routines : Wash your hands!Hands are a germ factory. Innumerable things are touched by us through the course of a day and that lends the germs a perfect breeding ground. Hence, it becomes imperative that we clean our hands thoroughly, especially before eating. Always keep a sanitizer handy in case you don have access to water and soap. Even while you wash your hands with soap and water, do not rush with the process. Wash thoroughly at least for 20 seconds. Clean the surfaces!Computer keyboards, tables, pens and pencils, shared stationary are all great places to find the flu virus. Regularly clean these surfaces with an alcohol-based disinfectant that will kill these germs. Exercise!Nothing can be as good as regular physical exercise for maintaining good health. Regular exercising boosts the immunity. This makes you fall ill less often. It also gives you greater resistance against viruses so you will not be affected by them no matter how strong the exposure. Top up on vitamin C!Vitamin C is known to boost your immunity levels. It also increases the resistance against viruses. Eat a lot of citrus fruits like oranges and tomatoes. Amla, that is a rich source of vitamin C, can also be consumed in the form of juice or eaten raw! Chicken soup for the ill-soul!Chicken soup is known to be the most effective against the flu virus. So if you feel you are coming down with a flu fever, rush to the kitchen and fix up some nourishing chicken soup for yourself. Nothing works as effectively as this does. Try poking yourself!The ancient Chinese system of medicine, acupuncture, has been known to treat everything from headaches to nausea to arthritis. Acupuncture experts may prick at particular pressure points with hair like needles to keep flu at bay and to reduce the severity if already infected. Though there is no significant scientific evidence against it, there is absolutely no harm in trying it, if you can tolerate the pain from the needles!. OTC drugs!Over-the-counter medications are available in plenty for flu symptoms. The achy feeling all over the body, the sore throat, and the muscle pain are the worst symptoms of flu. Doctors suggest that you do not over-medicate yourself. Instead of going for multi-drug combinations, doctors advise you go for generic medicines like acetaminophen for fever and a cough suppressant. Garlic pods!These smelly things can be of great use when it comes to prevent a lot of diseases, the flu included. Studies show that people who ate two or three pods of garlic daily had better resistance against the flu virus and fell ill less often. Proactive Probiotics!The strength of your immune system lies in your gut, called gut-associated lymphoid tissue or GALT. Almost 80% of the immunity comes from your gut. To keep the gut healthy, eat a lot of probiotic, pro-GALT foods like yoghurt. Sleep well!Sleep is the most essential component of staying healthy. A well-relaxed body is fitter and stronger and will have better immunity against diseases! Prevention is always the better form of cure. Stay protected and stay healthy.
Is sex linked to self esteem?Man is a curious creature, full of quirks and contradictions. Sexual intercourse, something that most people consider an intimate and private experience, is spoken about in hushed tones and often, with some discomfort. We don't reveal or talk about our sexual desires, as readily we discuss our salary packages or food habits. This is quite ironic seeing how sex is an important gauge for a person's self esteem and also an indicator of his/her social desirability. The very thing that we do under covers, we somehow choose to "keep under cover". The Link between Sex and Self Esteem: Self esteem is an important factor that determines the mental & physical well-being of an individual. All of us have a craving to be understood, liked and appreciated; and these form the equivalent of our basic needs on the inverted pyramid- Food, clothing and shelter. For a human being to flourish and prosper, consumable food, without the mental food of appreciation, is not enough; and sexual intercourse or an intimacy with the opposite sex, is one way of validating that need. Sex therefore, ceases to be just a physical need instilled by nature for the perpetuation of the species, but goes into the larger emotional cum psychological dimension of self actualization and realization. Though some of us might be embarrassed to broach the topic of 'whether or not we are getting enough', the truth is that every human seeks to achieve his sexual potential, even while he or she might, not be aware of it. Most of us have the ability to get the foods matching our taste preferences onto our plates, but with sex, this could be a little difficult, since sex, is a complex subject with a lot of social, moral and religious links. The truth is evident in the number of marriages (the very cornerstones of civil society) that fail on the basis of sexual compatibility, either by setting unrealistic sexual expectations or by not owning up to, or even identifying, one's sexual needs. This has repercussions on the psyche and self-esteem of a person, and this is especially true in the case of men in particular, as they may feel completely inferior for not being able to attract a sexual partner matching his desires. In some people, this also leads to a case of self-loathing, for having sexual needs which a partner doesn't understand, or much worse, needs which are considered taboo and sinful (Homosexuality, Anal Sex, Group Sex, Fetishes, etc.) These complex emotions can wreak  havoc on a person's self-esteem, by creating severe internal conflicts and serious self-doubts. Now socially, sex can either liberate a person, or hold him prisoner. At times, the unfulfilled needs may get repressed and banished to the shadows, only to be played out later, in the form of sexual adventurism and crime. Just one look at the sexual crimes in our society today, and we can clearly understand just how healthy our collective self esteem is! The very society that frowns upon prostitution, is actually responsible for creating it, though everybody would like to pretend otherwise. The crux of the matter is that "sex" and "self esteem" are closely related; and one should not shy away from addressing any issues one might face regarding one's sexuality. Physical love is necessary for the survival of a relationship and one needs to make time and efforts to successfully create one's own sexual space. The positive effects of a good sex life can be seen in an increased work productivity, fewer illnesses and an increase in one's overall efficiency. Some people are haunted by sexual guilt and confusion and when they keep it all locked up, they suffer from unexplained physical pains and feel 'down in the dumps' mentally. Another problem with appreciation from the opposite sex, is the addiction to  external validation. Some people feel utterly worthless until they receive positive feedback about their looks or abilities on a regular basis. This can be downright devastating, as in these cases, there is a great dependence on external factors for one to feel good. While no one denies the "feel good factor" of sexual appreciation, it is up to each one of us, to decide just how much of control one must be giving to external factors, to determine our personal self-esteem. The appreciation may be theirs, but the esteem is entirely of the self and only the self can decide how much of appreciation and sex is enough.
What, how, and why of the sex muscle answeredWhat the Penis is made up of? The penis is made up of several parts. The head: This is also called as the 'glans'. The glans is coated with soft pinkish tissue called the mucosa. The protective covering of the glans is called the foreskin. The foreskin is retractable. In circumcised men, it is the foreskin that is removed. The shaft: The shaft or the body of the penis has two surfaces. The dorsal part i.e. the upper part of an erect penis and the ventral part i.e. the lower part that faces backwards in a flaccid penis. The root: This is the attached part of the penis. Corpus cavernosum: This is the tissue that lines the shaft on two sides on the dorsal side. During sexual excitement, this corpus cavernosum fills with blood that results in the stiff erect penis. Corpus spongiosum: This is the tissue layer running in between the two layers of corpus cavernosum on the ventral side of the shaft. The urethra: This is a narrow tube that runs through the corpus spongiosum. The urethra's main function is to excrete the urine out of the body. How the Penis does what it is supposed to do? Urination: The process of expelling urine is a coordinated act involving the bladder muscles, the central and the somatic nervous systems. The urethra present in the penis serves as a tube for the urine to pass out. Erection: A erect penis is required for the successful insertion into the vagina. During the height of sexual excitement, there occurs dilatation or enlargement of the blood vessels in the corpus cavernosum causing a rush of blood into it. This elongates the penis and makes it hard and stiff. Erection angles: The way a normal penis points when erect is called the erection angle. The penis is either pointing straight to the front or it may be facing up or down to the feet. An upward angle is most common. A study published in 'Journal of Sex and Marital Therapy', shows the erectile angles in standing males from 20 to 69 age groups in the following table In the table, zero degrees is pointing straight up against the abdomen, 90 degrees is horizontal and pointing straight forward, while 180 degrees would be pointing straight down to the feet. Angles from vertically upwards: 0-3 - 5% of male 30-60 - 30% of males 60-85 - 31% of males 85-95 - 10% of males 95-125 - 20% of males 120-180 - 5% of males Ejaculation: Ejaculation is when the semen is pushed out of the penis. During the sexual act, the process of ejaculation forms the culmination with the male achieving an orgasm immediately after. At times, there is ejaculation of semen spontaneously during sleep, called Wet Dreams. Normal Variations- When you have what others don't (and it is completely normal to have them)! Curvatures: While most penises are straight, it is not abnormal to have a curved penis. Curvatures up to 30 degrees are considered normal and no medical attention is advised. Over 45 degrees may need you to get yourself checked for certain diseases, though. Phimosis: This is the inability to retract the fore-skin fully. It is harmless and occurs in about 8% of boys. The British Medical Association suggests that no medical treatment may be required till 19years of age. Pearly Penile Papules: These are small pale bumps that are found around the tip of the penis. They are very common in men aged 20 to 40 years and may be mistaken for warts. Unlike warts though, they are completely harmless and require no treatment. The human penis has one of the most advanced designs through eons of natural selection for high sperm competition. Disorders of the Penis: When you have what others don't (and it is not normal to have them)! Paraphimosis: This is the inability to retract the foreskin. It may be extremely painful when retracted. This condition occurs when there is leftover fluid accumulated n the foreskin due to some previous surgery. Peyronie's Disease: This is a condition where the penis is extremely curved. It is caused due to a scar tissue running through the shaft of the penis. There is an option of surgical correction. Herpetic Eruptions: This can happen when there is unprotected intercourse with an infected partner. It shows as painful ulcers and eruptions on the head and shaft of the penis. Absence of sensations and erection: This is a condition where one is not able to feel any kind of sensation in the penis and a total lack of erection. This occurs secondary to diabetes mellitus and also as an after-effect of past falls on the back or injuries to the groin area. Erectile Dysfunction: This is a condition that happens due to psychological stress, performance anxiety, natural ageing and diabetes mellitus. It is expressed as an inability to get aroused or inability to maintain the erection for a time enough for proper sexual activity. Priapism: This is a serious condition requiring immediate medical attention. Here the erect penis fails to return to its flaccid state and as a result may lead to potentially serious conditions like a thrombosis or gangrenous state. Severe cases may require amputation too. The causative mechanisms are not well-known but involve complex neurological and vascular factors. The condition is associated with drugs like sildenafil, commonly known as Viagra. Pudendal Nerve Entrapment: Too tight pants and underwear, arrow hard bicycle seats, accidents can lead to this condition. The symptoms include loss of sensation and ability to achieve orgasm along with pain in the penis during sitting. Infections: Common infections of the penis include balanitis, urethritis, syphilis and gonorrhea. Theya re characterized by burning, itching and foul discharge. Lasting longer in bed is every man's desire. How do you go about it is very important. Follow the right diet and exercises along with lifestyle changes to achieve the desired effect in bed. Stay away from medications that claim to make you last long. Ref: Sparling J (1997). "Penile erections: shape, angle, and length". Journal of Sex & Marital Therapy 23 (3): 195-207
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