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Anger management in menThis isn't a tirade against TV Violence. On the contrary, why blame the movies for spewing out blood, guts and gore, when all they really do is reflect the times we live in. Art imitates life doesn't it? So why blame the rising crime graph and street violence on TV and movies? Why not peep within our own selves and see the sheer ferocity of the anger which we project collectively on box office sell-outs. Examine the angry man within. So well you shrug it off and say "We didn't start the fire, it's been always burning since the world's been turning." You can certainly do your bit to help douse that fire before it turns into a conflagration, spiralling out of control until it consumes you mentally, physically and spiritually. Anger is bad. Period. Inscrutable and mysterious indeed are the ways of anger. It is to do with the pace of one's life in these times which starts it all we suppose. Then comes the classic conflict between nature and nurture further adding 'reddie points' to the anger account which is ticking away somewhere accruing interest. Someday something as silly as a traffic snarl or a bad joke or anything really trivial or big; justifiable or unjustifiable will cause this anger to spew out like molten lava from the fissures of your head. Self control, restraint and tranquillity are then mere concepts which lie in a crumpled heap as the angry young man in you takes over and hits out at everything within sight. Since time immemorial, the male temperament has been programmed to hunt, protect and gather. The caveman in most males has not evolved at all! It now wears a suit and goes hunting gathering in his corporate cave. This is the monster in most of us we have to tame through "Anger Management". We might have taken a dig at the caveman being the corporate type, but he could be anyone with an anger issues - you, me, the petrol pump attendant or even Sean Penn and Charlie Sheen. Celebrities often have the luxury of having anger issues and, as we all know it, many a famous anger tantrum is often overlooked as a creative outburst. For us however it could mean a long term in jail and much worse - our days filled with regret! Anger is an emotion and therefore much as I hate to say it necessary to tell us something is not right. So it is nature's way of helping us perceive through our senses and feel anger as a result of that perception, much like happiness and sadness. However anger has a particular corrosive quality about it which if not expressed or acknowledged can wreck havoc on a man's health. Why do you think men outnumber women right from barroom brawls to health conditions like hypertension, heart attack and migraines? Most men when questioned after socking the living daylights out of someone state that they just had that lightheaded feeling as the serpent raised its ugly hood, the blood pressure shot up and adrenalin coursed through the veins, the ears heard that sickening thud of a pacing heart and then "The other guy was down on the ground and I didn't even feel a thing when I sliced his throat open! Honest! I have issues!" Can you imagine how horrifying it must be to lose our faculties and go berserk? Can you imagine how many innocent people are victims of road rage and unjustified violence? So how do you ditch that anger? First step is to find yourself a relaxation routine and deep breathing exercises can help you be more in control of your temper. Relax your muscles of all that tautness which anger makes it do. Consciously at a regular time do this relaxation routine. Feel your body respond by 'letting go' of old holding patterns. Yoga Postures, especially the 'Shavasana' can help tremendously by relaxing excitable natures and enables them to relax the body at will. Next time you feel angry about something you will find yourself responding appropriately. Remember it is you against anger. Tell yourself that anger is like a serpent it might bite its owner. So find a suitable method of letting out your anger, and know that doesn't include steeping down on the accelerator and running into the back of someone's car. That is anger getting the better of you and that's 'Road Rage' and Murder and suicide. Punch a pillow, get a pair of boxing gloves and wallop the hell out of a punching bag, run a mile, shout your head off in a deserted place if you must, but unclench the jaw and fists and maybe you will start seeing the lighter side of things. There are enough things in this world that truly deserve your anger. Without anger sometimes we cannot enforce change on the negative things in society. Whenever we hear of a rape of a helpless woman on a bus we are bound to feel anger. However letting that anger getting the better of us and going in for instant vigilante justice for perceived crimes is just as wrong. Then what sets us apart from people who rape, loot, plunder or murder? If we all exercise restraint and express anger as and when it registers instead of holding it inside would help a great deal. If you are angry about being given the short end of the stick at work and if for some reason you cannot express it then ensure that you don't implode by keeping it in or explode somewhere it is completely unwarranted. There will be a day when we will hear "TV Violins" instead of watching TV Violence.
The moody man - Mood swings in menMen, such jokes on a woman's monthly mood swings are passe. Recent research proves that men are equally prone to have mood swings. Have you experienced a myriad of emotions? Angry, irritated, feeling helpless, self-pity, an irrational urge to throw things and cry and be depressed all at the same time? These are signs of mood swings. And the point of interest here is that you don't have to be a woman to experience mood swings. Men face their share of mood swings too! Men undergo hormonal influence too. And like women this causes them too to be irritable and cranky. The difference here is that the hormonal fluctuations are not as severe in men as in women. So the mood change lasts for a lesser time compared to a woman. Men's moods are also affected by psychological and physiological stressors. So a man who has to work against time to meet a deadline will be very irritable. A man who is deprived of sleep will end up snapping at you for no apparent reason. The myth that men don't cry, is something that men take to heart. Men are emotional beings and it is okay to show some of the emotions. The male stereotypical image is such that if a man is expressive of his emotional side, he isn't considered macho enough. Hence men tend to internalize their emotions and feelings. Often this leads to chronic depression. Taming the mood swings. Any form of physical exercise helps keep the mood in balance. This helps in keeping the aggressiveness under check. Sex is also a great way to release the stress and feel better, rather than snapping and using profanities. Another helpful way is to ask yourself 'why'. Whenever you feel that you are doing something irrational or out of character, ask yourself why. The answer you get from yourself will help clear the situation and you will end up handling it in a mature fashion. The irritable male syndrome. This is the male equivalent of the female menopause - The Andropause. It covers the symptoms seen in middle-aged men that occur due to the drop in testosterone levels. Like women, men show mood changes, bouts of irritability, grumpiness, hypersensitivity, anxiety and frustration. The recent research on men having mood swings and the society's acceptance of these findings is very encouraging. It helps stress in the fact that men are emotional too. There is nothing anti-macho about a man crying his heart out at times. It only shows he is human, after all.
Infertility at workplaceSince infertility among the younger age is increasing, it is important that a couple decides an early suitable date to attempt conception. Time and again it has been found that infrequency of intercourse is the cause of delayed pregnancy. It is advisable that the woman has a thorough examination by the gynecologists to identify the ovulation dates and for the man to have a thorough spermatic fluid check.  If both are normal then they could wait for a suitable date later. Should there be a problem the quicker it is attended to better. Also, early in the marriage they should start a fund which could be utilized for matters related to conception. For the male, the main treatment covers his personal sex life and a detailed examination of his spermatic fluid. It is the female who has to undergo many detailed tests and possibly surgeries which are expensive. It is often seen that not only the procedures for both take a toll on their personal and intimate relationship but also severely affect their finances which may come to a point that it does not allow them to complete the treatment as for e.g. the woman undergoing IVF may costs several lakhs of rupees. The treatment of infertility has improved greatly, but interferes severely with the work schedule. Working couples particularly women may have a hard time keeping to their schedules. Depending on their infertility diagnosis, many workplace challenges exist including the need to take time off to undergo tests and other appointments. It is difficult to balance the medical and surgical procedures with daily life and work. This is a difficult issue for many people as they fear their employer may discriminate against them for taking time off from work. Sadly in India there are very few employers who include medical benefits and cost of treatment for infertility. Suggestions have been given on stress dealing with infertility treatment and work. Here are few pitfalls to avoid: Do Your Homework: Review your organization's HR policies so you understand the amount of leave you have and other policies that pertain to your situation. You may be able to arrange for flex time or work from home on the days of your appointments, so that you do not actually miss any work. Be Honest:  Go to supervisor and let her or him know that you will be using your leave time and will give as much notice as possible. Honesty is the best policy. Remember people are inherently curious about the disease of infertility. If you feel the questions are invasive and make you feel uncomfortable, remember you do not have to answer the questions. You can respond nicely and let them know that you appreciate their concern but you are not ready to answer any questions. Your co-workers are asking question because it is human nature to be curious. In conclusion, not everyone needs to know what is happening with your reproductive health. At work place should medical help be available do take advantage of it.  This treatment has nothing to do with your performance at work. Go to work feeling confident that you will be able to perform your job and handle your workload during this time.
The post-delivery bluesA baby being born is cause for celebration. Especially in a country like India, where the family ties tend to be close, there is a festive atmosphere at home. However, sometimes the mothers may not share the same enthusiasm. This wave of negative emotions in the middle of what is clearly a happy occasion can be confusing for the new mother. Interestingly these feelings are not abnormal, as many new moms face postpartum depression, which is also called baby blues. It is an emotional reaction that begins a few days after delivery and lasts not more than 2 weeks. What are the symptoms of postpartum depression? Feelings of anger or irritability. Lack of interest in the baby. Lack of appetite and sleep disturbance. Crying and sadness. Irritability or hypersensitivity. Feelings of guilt, shame or hopelessness. Loss of interest, joy or pleasure in the things you used to enjoy. Possible thoughts of harming the baby or yourself. What are the causes of postpartum depression? Postpartum depression can occur due to a combination of factors. Hormonal changes: Changes in the level of hormones can leave you feeling tired, sluggish and depressed. Changes in your blood volume, blood pressure, immune system and metabolism can contribute to fatigue and mood swings. Emotional factors: Feeling overwhelmed with the new arrival in the family, and taking care of the baby day and night, may leave you sleep deprived, overexerted, and anxious. New mothers also feel that they look less attractive after pregnancy. You may feel that people around you are concerned with the baby more than you, and that you are being neglected. All these emotional factors may lead to postpartum depression. Other factors: Issues like breast feeding, financial strain, and relationship troubles can also contribute to postpartum depression. How does one deal with postpartum depression? Take complete rest and sleep for sufficient hours Spend quality time with your husband Go for healthy diet Take morning or evening walk for fresh air Try to follow yoga or other exercises Share your feelings with your husband or friends Do not overexert Join some groups for new moms Go for individual therapy or counsellors Remember, postpartum depression is not an incurable problem. It is just a temporary state of mind, which can be overcome if you are sufficiently aware of the problem.                
LBW - Babies that don't throw too much weight around!You'll hear this term if your baby weighs less than 2.5 kg (5.5 lb) when born. About six in 100 babies who are born in the UK have a low birth weight. There are a number of reasons for LBW in babies, with premature birth topping the list as far as reasons go. Babies born prematurely could have extremely low birth weight as compared to babies that are born between the natural term of pregnancy, i.e., between 36-40 weeks. So what are the other reasons behind LBW babies? Descent is an important factor that could also determine birth weight. A survey conducted in the UK showed that children born to people from the Indian sub-continent (Indian, Pakistani, or Bangladeshi) or African parents are more likely to be born with LBW as compared to babies born of white Caucasians. In case of twins or triplets, there are chances that one or all offspring might have LBW due to lack of space in the womb. The mother's health would largely determine the healthy weight of the child as well. Emotional problems faced by the mother during pregnancy could have a link with LBW. Same goes for addictions like smoking, alcohol abuse, designer drugs, and at times, health conditions like high blood pressure which cuts off healthy blood supply to the fetus. Even damage to the placenta can cause LBW, as the fetus does not receive vital nutrients, blood, and oxygen which can cause stunted growth or low weight at birth. Any congenital or hereditary conditions can also affect the baby's weight. There is much uncertainty with regard to the future of a baby with low birth weight. There have been instances where LBW babies have developed conditions like obesity, diabetes, or heart disease in later years. It is a common fear that LBW babies develop behavioral or emotional problems in schooling years and they are likely to have low intelligence. Of course, there isn't any concrete evidence. The pivotal factors here would be to find the cause for LBW and what trimester of pregnancy was it detected. Providing a stable family environment and taking special care of a LBW baby can also go a long way in keeping it healthy in subsequent years. Not to forget that the parents' size and genetic predisposition would have a lot to do with the baby's health and even weight. If the parents are small in size or underweight, then the chances are that the baby will be born small or with LBW. Breastfeeding the baby is the best strategy that a mother can adopt to ensure that the baby grows up well. While growing up, the parents will have to ensure that the baby receives a balanced nutritious diet to ensure healthy weight.
Anger management for your teenaged daughter - Handling difficult teenage times If one fine day you find your daughter suddenly reacting differently to a particular situation, do not be surprised, especially if she is in her teens. The outburst is beyond her control and she herself is confused by her own behavior, at times. It's important rather than scolding her for her misbehavior, one must wait for her to calm down and then speak to her regarding the incident when she is in a jolly mood. It is impossible to forgive such behavior if it repeats regularly, though. Here are some ways to deal with your daughter if she strays the limits of accepted norm for a behavior. You can seek the help of a counselor and understand why this is happening and solve her queries so that she could handle them better in the future. Why do Teenage Girls Lose Temper?By the time, the girls enter their teens they would have become aware about the social etiquettes, importance of looks, acting in an acceptable manner in social scenarios and creating a 'cool' image about themselves when they are outside their homes. So, even if they are hurt, or are angry at something, they do not let it go public, lest their 'cool' image gets shattered. However, the same anger becomes bottled up and vents itself out when they reach home. It's much like the workplace anger showing up at home. This is the place where they can behave wildly and still expect forgiveness. However, that does not mean that you should let your daughter get away with such kind of madness. After she has cooled down, you need to talk to her to find out what is bothering her or making her behave in such a manner. Probably, she may not accept that she has a problem, but you will have to find a way to reach to the root of the issue. More often girls want to be like someone in their college or peer group. They want to fit into a particular group and being unable to do so makes them nervous and distraught. Teach your daughter to believe in herself. Make her understand that she is a unique person on her own and do not need to convert herself into someone else. It may take consistent effort on your part to imbibe all these things into her mind, but you have to work hard to make her understand. Self-Control is the KeyMany young girls do not know how to solve a particular problem when they are faced with it. Apart from taking her to a good counselor, you can discuss problem solving techniques with her. Ask her to understand the situation first, put a foot backwards, relax, and then find a solution to the problem. This habit will make her probe into the problem in a better way and she will be able to handle similar situations when they occur again. You can ask her to write down the problems that are bothering her and ponder over them. You can assist her initially, but as she matures she will find her own solutions depending on her past experiences. Adolescent girls have sometimes trouble keeping their anger, rage, and fear under control and hence their problems should be handled patiently. Brainstorming SolutionsOnce she has ripped apart every aspect of the problem and has come to a brainstorming solution, advise her to write down the plan of action. For example, if she is disturbed due to a particular teacher who does not seem to like her grades, she may do well seeking help through friends who are better in that subject, or for that matter, a bad remark by someone in a group might unsettle her, thereby venting her anger at home. With restraint on your part, make her understand that anger will only block her process to think or find a solution. If you teach her to find answers for the problems in a calm manner, your teenage daughter will surely learn to control her anger and behave normally as she grows into an adult.
Are you a chocoholic? : Dealing with chocolate addictionSerotonin is a hormone that produces relaxed and happy mental state. This hormone is activated when you consume sweet and high-fat foods. Apart from serotonin, chocolate also contains phenylethylamine which produces feelings of enthusiasm and attraction. The obsession with chocolate is marked by intense craving for it, loss of control over its consumption, and continual consumption despite negative repercussions. Is chocoholism a true addiction? Chocolate is a manifestation of desires and there is also a resistance to it. This cultural phenomenon of mysterious romance and excitement increases the attractiveness of chocolate. Apart from these, advertising and grocery shop displays also connect chocolate with an object of desire, thus triggering its need in times of emotional stress. Though the symptoms shown by those who are addicted to chocolate is much like those who are misusing substance, it is generally not considered an addiction in a true sense, as this is an acquired obsession (through culture and media) than due to bodily changes. Foods like broccoli also contain the mood-altering ingredients, even in higher concentrations. The compulsion with chocolate is considered to be owing to its texture, sweetness, and aroma. Here are a few steps to overcome your chocolate addiction: Step 1- Symptom AcknowledgmentWhile it is not considered a true addiction by many psychologists, most agree that the experience of compulsion towards chocolate is much like the ones towards drugs. It is important to diagnose and check your condition. You need to have a chocolate bite everyday. Generally, a particular time is chosen, like after lunch when your mind is a little discharged and you need that small bit of kick to arouse yourself back to normalcy. If you do not have access to chocolate, you feel anxious and find ways to get hold of a chocolate bar. Step 2- Know The ConsequencesIf you recognize that you are suffering from chocolate addiction, then be aware of the problems which it causes. It will lead to a series of bites where there would be no nutritional value and only fat and sugar induced by the chocolate. You would be needy for the chocolate, and thus, your emotions will be ruled by a bar of sweet. You might get headaches after eating chocolate, but you would still eat it anyway. You might hide and consume chocolate, owing to the disapproval of your companions. Your health will gradually deteriorate with constant burden on your pocket to keep a stash of chocolate around. Step 3- Identify The CauseChocolate is a response to a root problem. For this purpose, you have to carefully observe the nature of your chocolate consumption. Note the triggers to your choco-pangs. Do you eat chocolate to lift your mood when you are sad or upset? Have you been on diet for too long, and because of suppressing the cravings, you see the chocolate bar as 'just one time' deal which is indefinitely extended? Maybe you feel excited and urge to eat chocolate just by thinking about chocolate. Lastly, you might be bored and want to while away your time. In the act of busying yourself, you find yourself munching on multiple bars of chocolate. Did you know that the impact of chocolate on the human psyche is greatly shaped by the idea of chocolate being a representative of romance and desire? Majority of young adults believe that chocolate is a symbol of love and the tendency to get addicted to it is strengthened with the hormones it produces. To avoid chocolate addiction, make sure you work on your eating pattern carefully. Step 4- Empathetic Path to RecoveryOnce you have found the root cause of your addiction, work on your problems gradually and with empathy. Don't push yourself to completely give it up unless you have been medically advised to go off it completely. Step 5- The Emotional EaterIf you consume chocolate when sad, find alternatives to feel better. For instance, some people listen to music or love to play with dogs to feel relaxed. Find your non-chocolaty solution to emotional problems. The best way would be to explore the cause of sadness and communicate with your friend or companion about it. This will nullify the possibility to there being any other dependency shift from chocolate. Step 6- The Boredom EaterIf you find yourself nibbling on chocolate when you are bored, then first become conscious of the act. After having eaten chocolate for boredom for months or years, one has to remind oneself about the act. So, look for other ways to spend your time. Pick up a hobby you like and pursue it. If you are really craving chocolate, then talk to someone who knows about your addiction and can divert your attention. Step 7- Dietary ChangesMake sure you shift to a balanced diet full of whole grain, fresh fruits and vegetables as well as water. You may also include nuts and dry fruits in your diet as well. Step 8- Scheduled Chocolate ConsumptionMake a resolution that you would only have chocolate once in three days (initially) and then slowly taper it off to only special occasions. Step 9- Withdrawal SymptomsWhen you are reducing the amount of chocolate you eat daily, you will undergo withdrawal signs. This will include headache, mood swings, depression, and in severe cases, flu. Be strong and do not give in to the symptoms. Busy yourself with other activities and do not concentrate on chocolate. Step 10- Sleeping, Eating and ExercisingThere are three prime components of healthy living: eating a balanced diet, drinking at least 8 to 10 glasses of water daily, getting adequate sleep (7 to 8 hours), and performing moderate exercise daily for 30 to 45 minutes. Focus on healthy living and build a harmonious relationship with any food item that you consume. Chocolate is a manifestation of desires and there is also a resistance to it. This cultural phenomenon of mysterious romance and excitement increases the attractiveness of chocolate. Apart from these, advertising and grocery displays also connect comfort in modern living with chocolate, thus triggering its need in times of emotional stress.
A guide to resolving commitment phobiaCommitment phobia could impact both men and women. The age-old idea of only men being commitment phobic has fallen to ground and such a fear is shared by both the genders today. The main issue of this psychological condition is that the partner involved is also traumatically affected. The initial stages of the relationship involve making the partner feel secure about the relationship by assurances and verbal confessions about future needs of a long-term companionship. This makes the person involved with the commitment phobic trusting the latter, only to be taken aback and hurt when she/he walks out at the time, to seriously and sincerely declare their relationship. One who is afraid of commitment would often have many failed emotional relationships in the past with the justification of never having found the right person. Even though you might just be the perfect match, it is possible that they would find something wrong with your lifestyle in order to justify his/her fear. There would be consistent contradiction in their declaring of love for you and the actions which might hurt or injure the trust built on basis of the verbal assurances. Cause of Commitment Phobia: The root of the fear is the need to feel in control. A commitment phobic will feel that after a point of time there is a need to withdraw from their lover in order to have an 'upper hand' in the relationship and feel in control. Such a feeling might not be conscious. While the commitment phobic is pursuing their partner, they are also keeping in mind the way to get out of the relationship. Thus, any compliment given is empty flattery, for it presupposes their exit when the time comes. They are also afraid of facing the truth of their emotions. Coming from unstable backgrounds, commitment phobic people are very lonely and afraid of pain. The parents might have had a loveless and emotionally numb relationship. There could also be instances of physical and sexual abuse apart from the mental trauma the patient goes through as a child. Bailing out is their defence against being hurt any time in the future. Thus, the only thing they are doing in the relationship is to make sure they have the power in their hands (via complimenting and making you believe in them) and to make you depend on them. Once you are dependent and look for a solid assurance of their existence in your life, they will walk out.  Due to the fear of getting hurt, no amount of emotional intimacy and efforts seem to be sufficient for them to believe in you. However, remember that it is possible to cure the condition with proper psychological and emotional support. Contrary to popular belief, both men and women suffer from commitment phobia. The root of this fear is sown during the early years of the patient's childhood and a vicious cycle arises in which the patient withholds from forming a full-fledged relationship with anyone, blaming the failures on incapacities of the partner involved. This cycle can end only with the individual effort and support of companions and lover. Treatment of Commitment Phobia: The main aim in treatment of commitment phobia is to change the way the patient thinks about relationships. If you know someone who is a commitment phobic or if you are afraid of commitment, then here are five ways to deal with it: Way 1- Accept YourselfYou are looking for a perfect partner in an ideal context. You want a long-term loving relationship, but you have experienced throughyour life that such relationships are filled with pain and assume that eventually all relationships are only bundles of pain. This is manifested by your tendency to obsessively find something wrong with your partner. You know that your partner is loving and doing everything they can to make the relationship work, even then you find something wrong with them. When you think about commitment, you feel suffocated, bored, or at danger because it would require you to let your guards down to a person, thus becoming open to being in pain again. Accept yourself. Don't distort who you are. Write down all you feel about relationships and accept it. Think about the past relationships you have had and admit that your fear has led to breaking up of many emotional relationships in the past. Way 2- Understanding Your ConditionBecome aware of what is mentally happening when you are running away from commitment. By knowing what is exactly happening when you are walking out of a relationship, you will be able to handle and help yourself well. Way 3- Find The Root of Your FearsExplore the sources for what you feel about relationships and commitment. Discover incidents in childhood which slowly disillusioned the image of loving relationships. Consider your ex-partners and admit their merits as well. By finding the root of your fears, you will be able to become aware of it when you are in the act of bailing out on a great relationship. Way 4- HypnotherapyThrough hypnotherapy, you will get to know the root of your fear. The process also involves creation of an unconscious transformation in the patient in the form of thoughts, feelings, and attitude. Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) and Lifespan Integration are also helpful ways to treat commitment phobia. Way 5- Consciously Think About The Pros As WellThink about the loving relationships you have wanted and understand that relationships are filled with ups and downs. Every person is guarded naturally against pain and you do not have to excessively fortify your emotions. Write down all the good things about your lover. Also note down the things you find faulty about them. Then, ask yourself if your act of complaining is much like the desires your parents or closed ones might have imposed on you. Know that every person has a set of incapacities, and as long as it does not affect their love towards you, you should not be worried by it. Way 6- Imagine The UltimateIf you are not going to work on the commitment phobia, realize that you will never be able to establish the loving relationship you have always wanted. To make sure that you do not end up missing out on the wonderful experience, you have to weigh the relationship wholly. As mentioned earlier, write down both the pros and cons. Weigh your fears and decide what you feel. Way 7- Control Your Urges to Walk OutYou might be urged to leave the moment you find an imperfection in the other. Assure yourself to understand your partner. Take your time, but do not walk out. Learn to stay and work on the issues that the other might have. Way 8- CommunicateOne of the main problems that commitment phobic people have is that they do not talk about their problems, as they believe to open up about their emotions would mean to be vulnerable and to lose their power in the relationship. If your partner loves and cares about you, then open up to him/her. Let him/her know how you feel. This would prepare the other for any tough situations in the future, and you would also learn to judge and trust the other. Way 9- The Time Is NowYou might think about all the bad things in your current relationship and talk it out. However, remember that you might just be missing out on a beautiful experience because of your fear. If you want to work on your commitment issues, the time is now. Learn about your partner more and judge your relationship objectively. Be aware of any fears that arise and their source. Answer the fears rationally and do not suppress them. Slowly, talk to your partner and deal with the phobia. Way 10- Love Yourself And Build Strong RelationshipsThe first step to treating any phobia is to accept oneself and begin the process of being compassionate to oneself. Love yourself. Often, there is a fertile ground of low self-esteem boiling under the over-confidence about demerits of the other. Accept your incapacities as well as merits. Build your relationship with honesty and gradually let open the doors of your love. You do not have to suppress any of your fears. You have to confront and answer them. By communicating with your partner and remembering to receive their love without complaint, you will be able to overcome your fears completely.
Sleep tight at every good night!A good night's sleep! Oh, what would some of us give for that luxury! Sure, you can blame it on the fast paced world and the things you have to do to keep the competition off your turf, and millions of other reasons to be sleep deprived. Yes, sleeping soundly and regularly is well within our control. Maybe it has eluded you so far and you are caught in a vicious circle of staring at the ceiling for hours on end; so read on to see what simple things you can do to gently drift off in to the arms of nature's greatest restorative- beauty sleep. Do's and don'ts for beauty sleep Fix a regular bed time, so that your brain will adjust to this by sending sleep signals to the body. If your bedtime is completely at the mercy of your activities then even as fatigue sets in the body will refuse to obey. So, even as your body is screaming for rest, the mind does otherwise. This is where good old discipline comes in to play. Take in to consideration the activities which are absolutely necessary to do and note the frequency with which they are likely to interfere with your bedtime before setting a realistic bed time. Initially the mind will refuse to obey, and you are most likely to get up, after tossing and turning in bed, to switch on the computer or whatever it is that you do when you cheat your bedtime. Rest assured, in a couple of days the brain will get used to this sleep routine and prepare you for shut down. Sleeping well also largely depends on how stress free you are. If the mind is in a state of constant excitement or anxiety, sleep will elude you. So when you lie down to sleep you need to fade out and blank everything out- joy and sorrow; expectations and ambitions, all of these out for later access! Tell yourself that tomorrow is another day and what you need today, is a state of neutrality! That's what most Indian philosophers would want you to do anyway. A good eight hours of sleep may depend largely on our minds but external factors can matter too. Sleep comes easily when your mattress is comfortable and not too soft or too hard. Use a pillow that won't give you neck pain, as any discomfort in the neck is likely to throw sleep off gear. Wearing clean night clothes can give you better quality of sleep. That goes for the bed spread as well.  Try this for yourself. Tight and uncomfortable night clothing is not recommended as this will only make you wriggle about for comfort. A cozy blanket and some clean nightclothes make great bedtime mates. Some people have a nightcap to help them sleep better while others still, drink themselves to sleep. Alcohol in large doses can only numb but does not help you sleep and you will only find yourself waking up frequently. Sleeping pills can be habit forming and might have serious side effects in the long run. So try simple remedies like a glass of warm milk or hot chocolate before bedtime to help you sleep better. Avoid stimulants like coffee, tea or nicotine before bedtime as that can keep your nerves all hyper thus making sleep quite difficult to come by. Computers and television are also largely responsible for us staying up late and disrupting our sleep patterns. We often find ourselves mechanically flipping channels or browsing without any real need for it. Try and go offline before bedtime, especially if you want to be able to schedule your sleep time. Television or movies can excite the brain and then you will find it difficult to fall asleep. So about an hour before bedtime switch off the telly or computer and just sit quietly and do some deep breathing exercises. Just sit cross legged for about ten minutes and relax your body. You are now ready for a deep slumber.
The age of nutritionAdvantages of Healthy Eating: Increased mental acuteness Resistance to illness and disease Higher energy levels More strong immune system Faster recuperation times Better management of chronic health problems Eating Obstacles for Seniors:  Lifestyle changes: Lifestyle changes can be an eating obstacle. For example single seniors may not know how to cook or may not like eating alone. Activity level: Seniors often cut back on activity for physical and medical reasons. Weight gain can result from the decrease in calories burned. Metabolism: Every year over the age of forty, our metabolism slows down. This means that even if you continue to eat the same amount and kinds of food as when you were younger, you're likely to gain weight because you're burning fewer calories. In addition, you may be less physically active now. Taste and appetite: The senses of taste and smell diminish, so one may be inclined to season one's food more heavily than before even though seniors need less salt than younger people. One may struggle with loss of appetite due to lifestyle, loneliness or a medical condition. Health Issues: Physical ailments and prescription medications, become a daily exercise, and ends up often negatively influencing appetite. Digestion:Due to changes in your digestive system, you generate less saliva and stomach acid as you get older, making it more difficult for your body to process certain vitamins and minerals, such as B12, B6 and folic acid, which are necessary to maintain mental alertness, a keen memory and good circulation. Emotional Factors: Emotional factors such as loneliness and depression can affect your diet. For some, feeling down leads to not eating and in others it may trigger overeating. Specific Nutritional Recommendations for Seniors: Some important guidelines for seniors include Reduce sodium (salt) to prevent high blood pressure, Monitor fat intake in order to maintain healthy cholesterol levels Consume more calcium and vitamin D for bone health Eat more fibre-rich foods to prevent constipation Cut back on sugar and on dry foods Ensure getting recommended amount of important vitamins and minerals Increase water intake, and Perform regular physical activity Eating well as you age is easier than you think: Focus on good carbohydrates. Opt for whole grain nutrition (brown rice, whole wheat bread, rolled oats, barley, and millet), not refined "white" products, such as white bread, white rice, or products made with white flour. To manage weight and maintain optimum health, focus on eating efficiently. This means choosing foods that maximize nutritional value, not calories. Whole, natural, fresh foods such as fruits and vegetables, whole grains, nuts, legumes, healthy sources of protein (poultry, fish, eggs, and tofu) and dairy products that contain calcium constitute efficient eating. Highly processed and refined foods usually contain more calories and fewer nutrients. Raw equals roughage! Aim to eat at least one daily serving of your fruits and vegetables raw. This not only preserves their nutritional value, it's an easy way to eliminate constipation. Steaming is the best way to cook vegetables; it preserves nutrients. Light sauting is next. Bone up on calcium. All dairy products are not created equal. Milk, cheese and yogurt retain their calcium content; cream cheese, cream and butter do not. As part of a healthy senior diet, choose fat-free or low fat dairy products. Choose first-rate fats. Get your "good" fats from oils such as olive oil and sunflower oil, avocados and avocado oil, nuts and seeds. Keep it moist. In addition to drinking enough water each day, aim to consume foods with high water content. Staying properly hydrated flushes toxins from your body, relieves constipation, helps keep your joints flexible and your mind clear. High water content foods include melons, grapes, cucumbers, onions, apples, cabbage, and, of course, soup.
A primer on heart attacksIndians around the world have one of the highest rates of heart diseases. Heart attack, also called as myocardial infarction, is mainly caused by a blockage that prevents oxygen-rich blood supply to your heart muscle. In other words, it is the death of the heart muscle. What causes a heart attack? When cholesterol deposition, plaques of calcium and proteins on the walls of your coronary artery cause blockage of the artery, your heart fails to receive sufficient nutrient-rich blood. This leads to the permanent death of heart muscle, and it is unable to pump the blood to your vital organs. Symptoms that signal a heart attack   Chest pain is a symptom of a heart attack.  This pain can feel like tight ache, pressure on the heart as if an elephant is sitting across the chest. However, you may get confused with the symptom chest pain - whether it is a heart attack or an angina pain. Chest pain lasts for a longer time in heart attack whereas the chest pain in angina lasts for few seconds and goes away after rest. The pain experienced during a heart attack sometimes feels like indigestion or heart burn. Other warning signs of heart attack are: Shortness of breath. Lightheadedness or fainting. Upper body discomfort in arm, the back, neck, and jaw. Nausea, vomiting, dizziness. Sleep problems or fatigue. Not every person will have the same symptoms of the heart attack. But if you have any of these warning signs, you have to act fast and get the right treatment.
Treating sore throatTest and diagnosisPatients with sore throat are examined by ENT specialists. At first, the doctor performs a local examination of throat. Clinical examination usually guides the doctor towards diagnosis. Although in order to confirm the diagnosis, the doctor may ask for culture and sensitivity test of the throat swab. Treatment Home remedies: Mild cases of sore throat are usually cured by home remedies. Following remedial measures can be adopted at home: Warm saline gargle – Gargle with warm saline water helps to relieve the discomfort and irritation of the throat. Half to one teaspoonful of salt is added to one full glass of warm water and the patient is advised to gargle. This process may be repeated 3 to 4 times a day to have a soothing effect on throat. Additionally, smoking and use of other tobacco products must be avoided. The patient must drink adequate amount of fluids. Warm liquid and semi-solid food must be consumed to provide a soothing effect on the throat. Cough lozenges to help relieve irritation and pain in the throat. Seeking advice of the doctor: If the signs and symptoms persist and are not adequately controlled by home remedies, the patient must seek advice of a specialist doctor. Viral infections usually do not require treatment. They are usually cured in 5 to 7 days. Bacterial infections require treatment as per the advice of a specialist doctor. Bacterial infections may require treatment by antibiotics. The treating doctor selects an antibiotic which is suitable for the patient depending on factors such as the age of the patient, report of the culture and sensitivity of throat swab, previous drug history of the patient, etc. Antibiotics usually effective in bacterial infection with sore throat are from the group of penicillins, cephalosporins, and macrolides. PreventionViral and bacterial infections are contagious. Good hygienic lifestyle and habits help prevent infections. Following things to be noted are: Frequent and thorough hand washes before consumption of food, after using toilet, and after sneezing and coughing. Use of a hand sanitizer during consumption of food outside home. Avoid sharing food and drinks from same glasses and utensils. Use a tissue paper or handkerchief while sneezing and coughing. Avoid close contact with patients with sore throat. If sore throat develops, few home remedies may prove to be curative. If sore throat persists, advice of a specialist doctor must be sought.
Painful intercourseSome of the causes affecting women can be: Going too fast, penetrating from an awkward position. Do not hesitate to tell your partner that it hurts and he needs to slow down or change position in order to make you comfortable and prevent pain. Dry vagina or lack of natural lubrication in the vagina. This dry vagina is caused due to some medications, changes at the menopause. Sometimes just increasing the time of foreplay can help vaginal lubrication. Use water-based lubricant to reduce pain. Failure to fire off. Sometimes failure of the vagina and uterus to respond to sexual arousal can lead to irritation and tenderness. The vagina may be too tight for the intercourse sometimes or the uterus may not be raised so that the penis comes in contact with the cervix during penetration. Using other penetration methods can be helpful to explore the level of arousal before engaging in intercourse. Vaginismus can be the cause of discomfort. Muscles surrounding vagina are sometimes very tight and lead to pain and intercourse to be painful. Woman can examine herself with her fingers to see if vaginal walls are tighter than normal. It can be vaginismus. Normal cause is nervousness or anxiety. It is reversible. Good foreplay before intercourse will help to relax the muscles and help lubricate. Just relaxing before the act can be helpful. Vaginal infection and inflammation due to yeast, herpes, etc. can make intercourse uncomfortable. Fabrics, creams, perfumes may cause irritation in area in some women. Avoid these. First-time sex can be a little painful. Rupture of the hymen can cause discomfort during penetration. Start slowly or begin with forms of penetration other than intercourse. Psychological pain. Sexually traumatic experiences or feelings of guilt associated with sex can make the act painful. Consult a sex therapist or psychiatrist. Discomfort during intercourse is experienced by men too, various causes affecting this outcome for men are: Tight foreskin. During first attempt at intercourse, tight foreskin will make retraction painful. After sometime, the foreskin will become loose and make intercourse comfortable. Any lesion on the penis skin can make intercourse painful. These may result from non-lubricated masturbation or rapid intercourse or STDs. The blisters due to herpes infection can make intercourse extremely painful.
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