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Strict parenting: When enough is enoughThe strict or authoritative style of parenting is where the parents hold their children's lives over a tight leash. Strict parents are high in control and low in nurturing qualities. They set high standards for all activities and expect strict obedience to the rules set by them. However, these parents display little or no warmth and affection. They love and affection they offer is also conditional love based on obedience and performance. Children of authoritarian parents turn out to be obedient, but this obedience is based on fear. Such parents very often use shame and guilt to make their children change their behaviour. They don't encourage verbal give-and-take and expect their orders to be obeyed without question. The children brought up in such a way are initially very obedient and polite but later all the suppressed emotions find an outlet. More often than not, such children end up being aggressive and tend to be bullies at school. Research shows that fathers who are extremely strict with their sons end up making their sons violent and aggressive, or indulge in non-physical aggressiveness like name calling. Strictly raised children have difficulty relating to their peer group. They either end up being aggressive or completely timid and submissive. At school teachers rate them as less socially competent, average or poor at studies and extra-curricular activities. They are also less accepted by their friends. The school dropout rates in such children are very high. Studies conducted on such dropouts revealed that they suffered from a huge inferiority complex and low self-esteem. Strict parenting can cause several problems in adolescence too. Children who are dominated by their parents are often found breaking the law. Alcohol and drug abuse rates are high in such children. Psychologically, these children are usually poor decision makers. Having had their parents make decisions for them all their lives, they find it very difficult to take a stand. They end up being indecisive. At the workplace too, they lack the competency to take up initiatives or show the lead. They make better team members than team leaders. Even if presented with an opportunity, they are likely to shy away from responsibility as they feel inferior and lack the requisite courage. Strict parenting can have a negative impact on the child's weight too. Studies show that an overly strict upbringing has a negative impact on weight because the children often fail to learn to eat on the basis of hunger and satiety. In such families parents use food as a reward, insist that children clean their plates, or restrict the kind or amount of food a child can eat. The studies showed that the children of authoritarian mothers were nearly five times as likely to be overweight compared to their counterparts!
Tips for the new fatherWhen a baby is born, all the attention is on the mother and the baby. And rightfully so, since the two need all the care in the world. However, the role of the father is very important even at this stage. The new dad has lot of responsibilities on his hand - he has to take care of both mom and the baby without getting annoyed or irritated. Here's how to do your best as husband and dad: Playing an active role in your child's life is vital for his emotional, physical, and cognitive development. Hold your baby as often as possible. By directly caring for your infant, you will learn about the baby's needs, how he communicates, and what comforts him best. Be prepared to feel left out at times. Your wife utilizes most of her energy and attention on the new baby. Be extra supportive and patient. Delivering a baby can be traumatic. Hormones ebb and flow. If there is ever a time to understand and care for your wife, this is it. Dads need to be more supportive and helpful. Share tasks like changing diapers, help around in the house by doing some household work like laundry. Talk to other new fathers about your experience and theirs. Most new parents experience a loss of sexual intimacy. Abstinence during pregnancy, pain, perineal tear, and breastfeeding can inhibit a woman's desire to have sex. Men can feel betrayed if rejected physically and mentally. It is important to talk about your feelings. Choose ways like cuddling, kissing, and holding hands to be physically intimate. One of main roles of a father is that of a protector. There are many ways you need to do this. Safety is one: child-proof your home. Dads now need to take care of driving, diet, and risk taking. Your baby needs you for a long time. Being healthy and happy dad is one of the greatest gifts you can give your kid. Dads need to provide financial protection to the new child. So get a life insurance, car insurance, an emergency fund, and a will. Try your best to spend as much time as possible with your new baby. While work may be your passion, it won't be long before children grown and no longer want to spend time with you. Take advantage of these years. Give the tiny tot gentle hugs. Dads shouldn't be afraid to show affection. Babies need physical contact, and not just from their moms. Snuggle with them, hug them, and kiss them. Read a baby-book to your child. Babies do understand. Sing him a gentle song or play a very soft music. Find out what makes your baby happy. Be good to the mom. Dads should be good and loving to mother of their new baby. Give her some time alone and babysit while she goes out, show affection to her, and give her little surprises. Because when the mom is happy, the baby is happy and the dad will be happy too.  
Importance of breastfeedingBreastfeeding is a natural act and that is why it is also one of the most beneficial acts for a baby. Breastfeeding provides essential nourishment and is the best food for the baby's stomach to digest. No matter how many infant formulas enriched with vitamins and minerals you provide to your baby, it can never replicate mother's milk. As for the mother, there is nothing more joyous than providing your baby with the best start that it can get in the long journey of life. The bond that the mother and the baby share through breastfeeding is one of the most special bonds. For the first six months, breastfeeding your baby is recommended for all mothers whether they are working or at home. Most working mothers are given leave, whether paid or unpaid, so they must ensure they provide their babies with regular breast milk. Breast milk protects the child against diarrhea, respiratory infections, pneumonia, ear infections, and helps to reduce chronic constipation and colic that the babies are prone to. Research also points to the fact that breastfed babies are immunized and protected against allergies, asthma, sudden death, diabetes, and obesity. They remain much healthier than those babies who are formula fed. In India, only 41% mothers begin early breastfeeding even though it has so many benefits. Mothers who exclusively breastfeed their babies help them to survive better. They also gift them with better brain development and these babies are likely to perform well intellectually. No matter which economic section of society the mother comes from, she can provide her baby with the best start in life by breastfeeding it and make sure that the child develops to its full potential. Breastfeeding is natural, simple, and cost-effective way to ensure your baby is healthy and continues to develop healthily. Since the breastfeeding campaign began on a large scale, child mortality has decreased. Immediate breastfeeding within one hour of birth has helped to significantly reduce sudden baby deaths. The colostrum, the first thick yellow breast milk is what protects babies from many diseases as it is filled with goodness. Lack of nutrition or malnutrition is another aspect that leads to infant deaths. Breastfeeding can significantly lower infant deaths from malnutrition as the mother's milk is one of the most nutritious foods provided by nature for the baby's healthy growth. A mother has the full ability to provide adequate nutrition for the baby, therefore breastfeeding needs to be encouraged fully. Employers need to create an appropriate space within their premises and should encourage new mothers to breastfeed their child. Breastfeeding also has a number of benefits for the mother. It helps to burn calories and the mother can return to her former pre-pregnancy state. Breastfeeding helps mothers to reduce their risk of breast, uterine, and ovarian cancer;high blood pressure;diabetes; and heart diseases. So for the first six months, mothers must make sure to breastfeed their baby and do not substitute it with baby food products.
Yoga to strengthen women's lifeEveryone expects from a women for all their necessities. The husband needs to go to office and she has to prepare for this, the son or daughter needs to go to school, tiffin needs to be packed, and the in-laws need her attention for the morning tea and breakfast. Along with this she has to rush to office on time. Then while returning, she has buy vegetables and other things for household, then go home and cook, and sleep late after all the chores are done. For such a multi-tasking working-women, the time available is very less to replenish the energy she uses to do such work. Multitasking leads to stress and tension and causes headaches, stiff neck, tight shoulders, poor posture, shortness of breath, clenched teeth and fatigue. What is the solution for this? The only solution is YOGA.  We all know that yoga has many positive effects on ones well-being; it brings about both physiological and psychological benefits. It is beneficial for body, mind, and spirit. It needs only 10 minutes. Yoga helps to relieve your stress and tension. Yoga in Sanskrit means 'YOG' that is to join or unite. It is the union of mind, body, spirit, and breath with our surroundings and our universe. One should start yoga gradually with a comfortable speed and limits. Breathing exercises are excellent way to reduce stress and tension. It can be done along with asanas. For this you have to sit comfortably with relaxed shoulders and with your chin level at the floor. Inhale through the nose expanding your abdomen, rib cage, then expand your chest, then begin to exhale by contracting your abdomen, ribs and then lastly relax your chest. Now continue to breath in this fashion, this improves the quality and quantity of oxygen that enters our body and helps to relieve the shortness of breath and relieves the tension. The yoga mudra is helpful to relieve the stress, for this sit down crossed legged on the mat and keep the back straight, then take the arms behind your back and hold the left wrist with the right hand. Then by exhaling, bend forward to touch your left knee, while doing this focus on the feeling of surrendering to God, which protects you all the time, then while inhaling come back to the normal position and repeat this on the right side. Then finally, complete this pose by touching the forehead to the ground in front in the centre, while doing this exhale, then when you feel like inhaling come back to the normal position. This posture increases the energy and stimulates your respiration, improves your digestion calms your nerves. But this should be avoided by pregnant women, hernia patients, and patients with retinal disorder. The shavasana also helps you to relax your body before you get to work. In this you have to lie down on your back on the mat. Keep your arms a foot away from your body and your feet separated two feet apart.  Then close your eyes and focus on your breathing and feel free of thoughts and tension. Breathe normally and focus on your body parts, toes, legs, abdomen, head and finally the scalp and try to relax each muscle group. It improves your breathing, concentration, gives inner peace. You should avoid this if you are suffering from low blood pressure.  
Bonding with the babyIt is an immense pleasure to hold a baby in your arms, isn't it? The bonding between amotherand her baby starts within the womb itself. When the baby is born, a few parents bond with the baby within minutes. But for others this may take some time. If the baby is taking time to respond to your affections, don't worry, here are some tips to help you with the bonding. Babies respond to the mother by making sounds, grasping, smiling, or crying. Touching, holding, kissing, cuddling, talking and singing help build a bond with your child. Infants prefer a human face to any other stimuli. So face your child as much as possible. The attention span of a new born baby is quite short. Hang a colorful object on top of the pram, cradle,or cot. Your baby already likes toys of different shapes. Various reflexes develop by the fourth week after birth. These include sucking, grasping, searching for the nipple and blinking. Baby may gaze at you some time. Respond by nodding, smiling, and talking to the baby. Babies are sensitive to their surroundings. They respond to music or the phone ringing by staring at it quietly. They observe toys keenly, spot colours and become happy at times. These are heart warming moments for the parents. Father's care usually builds a protective and secured feeling in a child which he carries for life and prevents building of any unreal fears in him in later life. So dads should care for and make their babies feel secure. You love to touch your bundle of joy, right? Babies love, enjoy, and need it as well. Skin-to-skin touch helps growth and development of the child. Mom's touch soothes the baby when he is irritated. Start reading to your child. It is never too early. It helps the development of reading skills and language. Babies enjoy pictures in the book. Even if baby can't understand words, they love to hear the parents' voices. During the first few months, they understand little of it, but they are thrilled by listening to you. Have a short reading session with your child daily.Dads can try this trick to make the baby sleep. Carry her around while patting her very gently on back.
The male ego: Fragile male self-esteemIn a world where men are constantly competing with one another, adding a woman to this dynamic changes the perception for majority of men. The fact that a woman is doing better than a man can largely affect relationships at a personal and professional level. Simple things like opening a door for men or even pulling a chair for him can make him feel self-insufficient. The whole concept of a woman doing something/anything better than him brings down his self-esteem. In a relationship the roots go deeper and men who are making less money or not doing as well as their partners have a more fragile self-esteem. The mental insecurity that a woman may be a better provider for the family and has more potential than he does, changes the dynamic of his relationship, while for women this does not seem to be the case. Fragile self-esteem alters your everyday determination and persistence. Without being determined, the only way to go is downwards. When self-esteem is affected by women doing things that he can do, men seem to take it in a negative manner and lower their self-esteem. Small examples of this in our day to day life are - driving your own car as compared to having a driver, being physically weaker than a woman, etc. Men are creating rules to ensure that women who are considered lower than them cannot perform or do better than them. Systems and frameworks are made which ensure that situations never come up where a "lower person" does better than a man can, all out of the fear that they can't perform! From the day we are born to the rest of our lives, we are drilled with the fact that men are better, stronger, and smarter than women. So when situations arise where she is doing or has done better than you, the male self-esteem is questioned and, most of the time, drops. Being the person you are meant to be, you would automatically create a system by your choice and influence it to reduce the possibility of any other to be able to achieve what you have, in turn increasing your self-esteem. However, when the other overcomes or surpasses this obstacle, your self-esteem will be hit hard causing a drop in your self-esteem like the stock exchange does on its bad days. Self-esteem is a very personal topic and completely dependent on the situations you have encountered across your life. However, when majority of these are leaning in one direction then there is no question of failure. Consider a world dominated by women, What would happen to your self-esteem? Do you think you would survive in this kind of world, a world in which all your thoughts are limited by restrictions and rules you have to adhere too, to ensure things like your family name is kept out of shame. So let us all do as the women have been doing for centuries, embrace it, and learn to maintain our self-preservation and esteem irrespective of our surroundings. This may sound hard but let us work towards a world where women and men are equal. Don't let your self-esteem be affected by your surroundings, if you know your surroundings are not the best for the future.
How to remember everyone you meet?Now that would be quite a feat, would it not? To be able to recall the name and occupation of every person we ever encountered right down to the minutiae of how, where, and why we were introduced to them to begin with! Sometimes we raise the bar of forgetfulness to the extent of forgetting just who it was who introduced us to "Mr. what's-his-face!" If only there were ways to remember the modest and average people who leave virtually no impression on us, wouldn't that save us great embarrassment? Plus it will help us do away with those sheepish looks when it dawns upon the other person that you haven't the foggiest of notions as to who he is. Stranger: Hi! You remember me? How are you doing, Frankie? Frank: Umm! I am well (this guy's face looks mighty familiar, but for the life of me, I cannot recall ever having cast my eyes on him). Stranger: So, how was your annual bridge completion? Manage to beat the Swiss pairs this time? Frank: Atta boy! Got it! This guy happened to be kibitzing at the weekend bridge club at Aldermere. Whew! Stranger: You gave me quite a start there. You looked right through me and I was quite not pleased at the fact that just last week I happened to congratulate you. Frank: Well Martin, be tough to not remember you, of course I do! Just didn't think of bumping into you here. Martin: Well, I am Walther and I can now see that you don't remember me at all! How many times has the above scenario happened to us? While it is well-nigh impossible to remember every name or face that we come across, it would be  a good habit to at least attempt our 'mental name book' to avoid an occasion for future embarrassment! Now, how in the world does one do that? Simplest way would be to carry a small notebook with a pen to make note of someone that you have just been introduced to, at a meeting or a social do. Our friends often introduce us to people and chances are that if there is no occasion to remember that person, then the brain fades it out of its memory list, as it will only use up space on the brain's 'hard disk.' Human memory might be jogged to remember trivia from 25 years ago in great detail, but ask a simple question - remember what you had for lunch last Tuesday?  - and that would be very difficult to answer, especially if last Tuesday was just an ordinary day with no special reference points around lunchtime to help you remember. Maybe if something momentous had occurred on Tuesday last, like pretty Meg from next door, sharing lunch with you rather unexpectedly, then you can bet your bottom dollar you will remember what you had on the day in question. So create reference points! When you are introduced to someone, first and foremost, reference it with who introduced you and then try and make a reference of at least one unique distinguishing feature in that person. Now you don't really require the eye of a physiognomist, and it would be mighty impolite to stare hard for the "distinguishing feature" coin to drop. So a quick look and you got 'long nose Mary Gomez' all referenced and ready for recall at the next chance meeting. Make the reference phrases funny so that you won't have any problem whatsoever in recalling the name behind the funny phrase when you most require it. Alternatively, try associating a picture with the name if you aren't very good with phrase reminders. These techniques are called mnemonics, which is pronounced ni-mon-nics, and funnily enough the very curious spelling - Mnemonics makes you want to have a picture card memory association for the right pronunciation. A mnemonic for this could be 'knee-moan- knicks". Easy enough, i.e., if you remember the sequence right. You could also try memory exercises with names picked off from the telephone directory at random. Pick an A-lister say - 'Anderson' and then flick through to D and pick 'Dougherty' and so on until you have picked at least 10 names of a different alphabet. Now, try and write down the numbers that you must have undoubtedly memorized until now. You can consider yourself blessed even if you are able to memorize the number of the third person by the time you reach person number 10. This will give you a memory for names and numbers at least. Or, go through any university web sites and look at the photo galleries of past alumni. Give yourself 1 minute to quickly glance at all the names on the page. Then try and recall the name by applying the memory picture association or develop your own technique. With regular practice, you could well be in the employ of the local police to help identify criminals off a line up. If that's too dangerous for you, then at least that will  keep your brain alert and active with this brain gym and help avoid any boo-boos in the future.
Aerobics: dancing your way to healthAerobic exercise is any comprehensive activity that makes you breathe hard while exercising your large muscle groups at a standard, even pace. The body uses stored carbohydrates and fats for energy. What is aerobics? Aerobic literally means having or providing oxygen or an activity that takes place only in the presence of oxygen. What is aerobic exercise? Aerobic exercise is any comprehensive activity that makes you breathe hard while exercising your large muscle groups at a standard, even pace. The body burns stored carbohydrates and fats for energy. Thus aerobic exercises help the body to utilize oxygen efficiently with increase in respiration and heart rate. What are the best ways to do aerobic exercises? There are number of ways by which you can exercise aerobically. Some easy and best ways are: walking, running, biking, using stationary bike, using stair stepper, elliptical machines or rowing machines, or joining an aerobic exercise class Benefits of aerobic exercises Fat reduction: Aerobics burns calories and body fats directly while using oxygen to produce energy. So this is the healthiest way to get rid of extra fat.  Strong heart: Aerobic exercises not only use your larger muscle groups like hamstrings, but also strengthen the heart muscles. This improves heart function resulting in improvement of blood and oxygen supply to all body parts, which provides healthy nourishment to body cell and removes toxins. Improves breathing: Exercises improve your lung capacity and function,which improves oxygenation, or competence of respiratory system to deliver oxygen to all body parts. It also improves overall health of the respiratory system. Cholesterol control: LDL cholesterol is bad cholesterol mostly responsible for clogging of arteries and HDL is good cholesterol. Aerobic exercises invariable increase the amount of HDL and lower LDL cholesterol thus preventing fat deposition and plaque formation and maintaining optimal blood supply to heart. Other benefits: Aerobics is the best exercise when it comes to prevention of various diseases like hypertension, diabetes, stroke and arthritis and osteoporosis. It helps to keep mood elevated and cures depression and boosts immunity. Make sure to incorporate some form of aerobic exercise in your daily routine.  
Stinky feet? Learn why!Most of us have experienced a bad smelly foot at least once in our lives. We all have that one friend or relative who has such smelly feet that he can clear off a room as soon as he kicks off his shoes! With more than 250,000 sweat glands in each foot, the feet are the most highly sweating parts of the body. What causes this bad smell? The feet contain thousands of sweat glands. During warm days or when you wear socks and tight shoes, the sweating increases in due proportion. The resulting sweat does not find an outlet and starts accumulating in the spaces available and this warm and moist area breeds bacteria. The bacteria start feasting on your sweat and dead skin. They digest their food and release the waste products. These waste products are toxic organic acids that cause the feet to smell so bad. About 10 to 15% of people suffer from this horribly bad smell. Why? This is because their feet are extra sweaty and become a home ground for certain bacteria called as Micrococcus sedantarius. Along with stinky organic acids, the bacteria produce volatile sulphur compounds. Sulphur compounds are powerful and extremely awful smelling almost like a dirty rotten egg. Teenage years also see extra amounts of sweating on the feet. Medical conditions like Hyperhidrosis can also make your feet sweat more. If you are suffering from a fungal infection of the foot, then rest assured that your feet will smell horrible. Smelly feet can be an embarrassing problem. It puts everyone in a spot. Hence, foot hygiene is important to avoid smelly feet. Always wash and dry your feet well every morning. Dab some antiperspirant powder on your feet and between the toes to soak the perspiration. Never wear the same shoes for more than 2 days in a row. Wear a fresh pair of socks daily. Keep your feet exposed to fresh air. Avoid tight-fitting shoes. Use an antibacterial soap to wash your feet if you have smelly feet. Visit your doctor if simple home measures do not prove very effective. Excessive sweating is often considered the cause for foot odor. This is not true. Sweating in itself is harmless; it is the bacteria that grow there that are responsible for the awful odor.
Bile block - Understanding gallbladder problemsRavi was a young intern working the night shifts in a government hospital when he was asked to examine a patient who had just been brought in. The patient was a 45-year-old, a fat man, who was complaining of pain in the right side of the abdomen along with nausea and vomiting. On inquiry it was revealed that he had eaten a very heavy fat-laden dinner. Remembering what his surgery professor had taught him about cholelithiaisis, Ravi immediately guessed what the diagnosis could be. He, however, sent the patient for a blood test and an abdominal scan. The reports confirmed Ravi’s suspicions- cholelithiasis, gallstones. The gallbladder is a tiny pear shaped organ that lies just below the liver. It is responsible for storing the bile that is produced by the liver for digesting food. It ensures the smooth outflow of the bile from the bile ducts. When the bile components aggregate in the gallbladder, they build up to form gallstones, similar to kidney stones. The gallstones are usually small enough to pass on to the intestines and be eliminated without causing too much trouble. At times, these stones may be big enough to block the outflow of the bile and give rise to a variety of symptoms depending on the size of the stone and severity of the block. The symptoms include -  Intermittent colic. A bloated sensation with constant nausea. Inability to tolerate fats. Vomiting.  Fever with chills if the stone becomes infected. Gall stones though found in both sexes, is more common in females. The risk factors for developing gallstones include - Diabetes. Organ transplant. Diseases like hemolytic anemia, sickle cell anemia. Liver cirrhosis. Failure of the gallbladder to empty properly, e.g., during pregnancy. Rapid weight and nutrition loss due to any reason. Gallstones are confirmed by a blood test to check the liver function and by an abdominal scan. Medications to dissolve the stones, and surgery in case of large stones that do not dissolve with medications, are the treatment options.
Importance of sex educationOur society is beset with a lot of myths about Human Sexuality and hence the family relationships are affected adversely. A man is considered (mistakenly) as a man only when he performs effectively in bed. In other words a man hangs his self-esteem on his male organ. Hence whenever there is a problem in performing sex, he becomes frustrated and depressed. In order to cover up his inadequacy he may blame his wife for his problems. This attitude will adversely affect the martial relationship, leading to unhappiness in nonsexual aspects of marriage. He may become violent when the wife retaliates. Marital break down, even if not ending in legal separation will be a very messy affair. Sexual behavior is determined by information or knowledge one has on hand and the parameters of comfort zone. Unfortunately we are dealing with a behavior that is besmirched with myths and misconceptions, and a breeding ground for stigmas and taboos, which leads to unhealthy sex life. These barriers have to be broken; otherwise healthy sexual and family life cannot be achieved. It is guesstimated that one in every three couples have some sexual problem or other and they do not know how and where to seek help. The media gives them anonymity and guides them in proper direction. The three main enemies of sexual satisfaction are guilt, anxiety and fear. All these stem from ignorance. Due to the stigmatization sex education is not available. Hence the streets have become not only the libraries for knowledge on sex but also the laboratories. When one of the dimensions (recreation) becomes problematic it impacts the health of the other two dimensions (procreation and relation). Magazine columns endeavor to dispel sexual ignorance and empower people with scientific knowledge. The aim is twofold: First, to inform in simple language, the scientific aspects of sexual problems and clarify myths surrounding sexuality; Second, to help people become comfortable with their own sexual life and elaborate on various treatment options available. People will thus be empowered to take responsibility for their own health and happiness. Have an open mind. All dimensions of human life are important. To consider one as unimportant and attach a stigma will hamper the development of the full potential of an individual. Understanding sexuality will enrich our lives and relationships.
Psychological impotenceSex is not just physical but just as equally mentally involved. Mental stimulation and response are responsible for arousal and overall enjoyment; and therefore any sort of psychological disturbance or mental issues like stress, tension, or anxiety can lead to psychological impotence. Stress or exhaustion are most possible explanations for psychological impotence. Depression and post-traumatic stress disorder also may result in impotence. A mental trauma of sexual or physical abuse, guilt due to sexual relationship, problems amongst partners contribute too. Confusion over one's sexual identity is also a major cause for impotence. Impotence results from underlying physical disorders, especially if the people choose to stay unaware of it. Absence of knowledge of this disorder leads to anxiety and stress building up over a period of time.  So when determining factors rule out physical causes first and then go for identifying mental causes. Psychological impotence can be sometimes situational or only with a particular partner and the treatment approach differs with the cause. Counseling works wonders in the case of psychological impotence. For example, depression or anxiety may require treatment to improve condition. Post-traumatic stress disorder or abuse needs therapy on coping skills. Sometimes simply explaining underlying cause of physical condition resulting in impotence and comfort and reassurance are sufficient. So don't hold back, share to get your mojo back!!
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