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Self grooming tips for men Get rid of unnecessary body hair:Hair on your ears, back, underarms, or uni-brows does not appeal at all. If you have them, then try and get a hair removing gel or wax away gently. Nose hairs can be trimmed from time to time, so that it's not visible. Hair in the underarms can either be waxed, or removed by using a razor. Hair on the back can also be removed through proper waxing. Shave properly:Keep a beard if it suits you, but do trim it regularly. If you do not want a beard, but just a moustache, then that requires customary trims as well. Try and keep yourself clean shaven, if you can't easily manage the styles mentioned above. Avoid bad breath:Bad breath can really get you into trouble, especially during office presentations, client meetings, or even at a date with your girlfriend. Use mouth washes to avoid this problem, and floss after every meal. Mouth fresheners can also come handy, so maintain a regular stock at all times. Brush regularly:Maintain a brush and floss routine twice a day to avoid awkward situations. Cut and clean your nails:Long nails look great on girls, but they are a big turn off in guys. Men need to keep their nails small and trimmed always. Use nail clippers to cut them properly, and cleaners to keep them clean. Take care of your skin:Buy a good sun care and moisturising lotion, and use it always, after a face wash and shower. This shall give you a nice glowing skin. Exercise regularly:A good body can attract everybody's attention. Eat healthy food and exercise regularly to be active and healthy. Get rid of body odour:Instead of colognes, try using deodorants and talcum powders to get rid of body odour. For underarms, always keep a roll-on with you, and apply it regularly. If the issue persists, then consult a doctor for help. Wear well fitting clothes:Wearing unfit or loose clothes will make you look older than you are. Hence, wear clothes which fit you the best. Correct your posture:While standing, walking, and even sitting, keep a straight back. This shall give u a better posture. You will look more pleasing and charming. Grooming is not just a thing for women. It is all about looking after yourself. So, read on to know some self grooming tips for men These were a few tips which can help you look after yourself better, and also give you that much needed edge over others. So, try them out right away!
What causes male balding?They say there are 3 types of men: the ones that go bald at the top are thinkers, the ones who go bald at the back are lovers, and the ones who grow bald at both places... only think they are lovers. If pregnancy and menstruation are a female's burden, then baldness is a great inconvenience to men. Some men lose their hair in their youth and thus lose their confidence along with their hair. So what is with baldness and men? Men start having a receding hairline by the time they hit 30, though it could begin in their 20s as well. The most common type of baldness is the mid-frontal type resembling a horseshoe. Earlier it was thought that baldness is caused only by genetic factors, but apparently emotions, lifestyle and diseases also contribute largely to hair loss and baldness. This hair loss can be temporary or permanent. Some medications like anticoagulants, antidepressants, antifungal medicines, chemotherapy etc can cause baldness. Certain diseases like thyroid disease, Crohn's disease, lupus can cause hair loss and baldness. Poor nutrition is an important factor in hair loss. Vitamin and mineral deficiencies along with poor nutrition can pave the path sooner than most other things. Then there are some conditions like Alopecia Areata which cause baldness in patches -- on the head or beard. It is temporary and the hair grow back in about 6 months to 1 year. Corticosteroid injections are used to treat the condition. Air and water pollutants, environmental toxins, conventional styling products have the potential to build up on the scalp. These affect hair cuticle, cause dryness, and weaken the hair causing them to easily break off before their natural lifecycle has ended. If you notice your hairline receding more than usual, then check if you are getting enough nutrition. Exercises like the headstand and handstand send the blood rushing to the scalp and can help with hair growth. Massaging the head with warm oil helps to increase blood circulation as well. Use a shampoo that suits your hair along with a conditioner. Oil your hair overnight at least thrice a week. Keep yourself well hydrated and try vitamin C which can help arrest hair fall. Use a clean comb and ensure that you sun your scalp, as vitamin D is an essential tonic for skin, bones, teeth and even hair.    
Perfect partners in crime - Midlife crisis and dementiaThe responses we have to common stressful events in our daily lives have a lasting impact on our brain structure. The effects of a stressful event last a very long time, though apparently we seem to have recovered from it. Researchers say that the stress hormones keep circulating in our body long after the stress has passed. According to a recent Swedish research study, our response to common life events may trigger long-lasting physiological changes in the brain. These interestingly shocking findings come from the Prospective Population Study of Women in Gothenburg, a long term study on 800 women that lasted for almost forty years. The women who were a part of this study were all born before 1930, and underwent regular neuropsychiatric tests. The study started in 1968 assessed women for any baseline stressors like workplace problems, widowhood, alcoholism and illness in the family. Women who had serious issues at the start of the study had a 21% higher risk of developing Alzheimer's Disease and 15% higher risk of developing dementia later on in life. Interestingly, having to take care of a mentally ill family member like a sibling or mother, was found to be a major cause for development of dementia later on in life. The findings of this study show that accumulated stress from common life events has severe physiological and psychological consequences. These physiological consequences include adverse effects on the central nervous, cardiovascular and endocrine and immune systems. There have been several studies that state that the effects of stressful events like earthquakes, cyclones and floods can have a lasting impact on life and often shape the person's personality. What makes this study interesting is its finding that daily stressors accumulated over a period of time and often left unresolved, have a lasting impact that shows up in later stages of life!
Stress - Even kids cannot escape!Often when we feel overwhelmed with stress, we go back in the past and reflect. We miss our golden days of childhood.We think of those days with fondness, miss the free and carefree times. We feel like becoming kids again. But the truth is that at no age are we free of stress and worries. It is just that with time, we move on to newer situations and every new stressor seems worse than the previous one. Children stress out too, some more than the others. Stressors Simple things like a test in school, a Physical Training class or poem recital could mean a lot of stress for the little ones. The desire to meet the expectations of parents or teachers also creates tremendous pressure on the children. They are eager to do well at all the times and the smallest failures can upset these kids immensely. Peer groups are difficult to manage. In childhood, the social maturity is not sufficiently developed to handle day-to-day conflicts. Trivial fights or comments from classmates and friends can lead to a long-lasting impact on the vulnerable minds. They get easily influenced by their friends. Elder siblings also play a major role. Some act as mentors, some as bullies. Some cause damage unknowingly, some are plain indifferent. Life is full of new things and childhood is a fast-track learning lesson. Every other day, there is something new a child has to do. Meet a new kid, learn a new subject, try to dodge a ball differently or ride a bicycle without side wheels; there is too much to learn. These cause anxiety and may make the child nervous. Performance pressures, technology, precocity, media influences, etc. are some of the other factors that add to the stress in childhood. Signs Watch out for subtle changes in moods and behaviour. With adults, it is easier to identify the stress and hence rectify it. But with children, it is quite a challenge. Most of the children are themselves unaware of the stress they are facing, they don't understand why they are feeling sad or angry or fearful. They are just not at ease. Inordinate crying or screaming is a common sign. Being withdrawn, aloof and quiet is another way by which kids express their tensions. Physical signs can be seen in basic physiological changes - in sleep patterns (oversleeping or inability to sleep), eating habits (not eating or eating too much), frequent aches and pains, especially digestion disturbances and headaches, etc. Managing childhood stress Pay attention to your child. Listen to what he/she is saying, but also try to listen to what he/she is not saying in words, although only in action. Help the kids open up to you, spend quality time with them and talk to them about everything under the sun. Be well connected with their school teachers and parents of their closest friends. If the need be, please don't hesitate to reach out and seek professional help from psychologists and child counsellors. "One of the luckiest things that can happen to you in life is, I think, to have a happy childhood." - Agatha Christie  
Bow legsCauses: Physiological - As mentioned before, bow legs are normal below 18 months of age. Thereafter as the child continues to grow the bowing begins to improve slowly. By the age of 3 to 4 the deformity usually gets corrected. Blount’s disease - This disease results in bowing of legs due to abnormality of the growth plate of the upper part of shinbone known as tibia. Growth plates are the growing end of the bones. It is diagnosed after the child is 3 to 4 years old. Rickets - Rickets is a group of diseases that occurs due to deficiency of vitamin D. Rickets is characterized by bow legs and other bony deformities. Most commonly rickets occurs in children due to deficient intake of vitamin D. Signs and symptoms: The bony deformity becomes visible when the affected child walks or stands. The uncommon walking pattern of the child is the commonest symptom. Bow legs usually do not cause any pain. However, persistent and severe bow legs cause discomfort to other bony structures like spine and hip. Test and diagnosis: The doctor at first asks questions to the parents regarding the development of the child. This is followed by physical examination of the child. Physical examination often suggests bow legs. If the doctor suspects an underlying disease, necessary laboratory tests are done. The doctor always asks for an x-ray of the affected legs to evaluate the severity and extent of bowing. Treatment: If the bow legs persist after 3 to 4 years or an underlying disease is detected, treatment is undertaken. Medical and non-surgical treatment- In cases of physiological bow legs, no treatment is required. The parents are reassured by the doctor and spontaneous resolution takes place by the age of 2 years. Continuous followup is advised for borderline cases. Children with Blount’s disease need treatment with a brace. Children with rickets need medical management by a specialist doctor. Additionally, they need advice and regular followup by an Orthopedic surgeon. Surgical treatment  - If the bony defects persist in children with bow legs even after medical and nonsurgical treatment, surgery is required to correct the bowing. Two types of surgery is advocated to correct bony deformity of the legs. Guided growth:  Growth of the healthy part of the growth plate is stopped and that of the abnormal part is promoted. This allows straightening of the legs. Tibial osteotomy: The shinbone (tibia) is cut and reshaped to correct the deformity. Then bone is fixed with screws and plate. In both surgeries a cast is applied to promote healing of the bone. Crutches may be required for a few weeks to prevent weight bearing on the limb. Later, physical therapies are advised for complete recovery of range of movements and regular activities. Prevention The parents need to be vigilant about appearance of any bony deformity in legs of their child. The child must be given adequate amount of vitamin D in diet or vitamin D supplementation to prevent development of rickets.
Accepting your flawsThere are basically two kinds of 'flaws,' one that is physical and the other that is in your personality. A physical 'flaw' like being too short, fat, or darkis never a person's fault. Thus accepting what you are can only boost your self-esteem and confidence. Despite these 'shortcomings,' it is your character and your achievements that stand out in the long run and not the way you look. The first step in creating a better life is accepting if you are wrong! Personality traits and habits are mostly visible to others but not to you. These are those faults that can cause bitterness in relationships or cause problems at work or in our social interactions. Some people lose their temper easily, some are lazy, and some are rude, while some are either introverts or extroverts. If you have flaws that can cause problems for others then the best thing you can do is to change those negative traits in yourself. Character flaws might be natural, but they can affect others negatively. The first thing in making improvements is to analyze yourself. What are you so angry about ? Is it really some other person's fault or that you have had a bad day at the office? Give it a thought and once you find the answers, you will feel relieved. Accept your physical flaws and love yourself for what you are, as this is the key to lasting happiness. Major flaws like alcoholism, splurging money, borrowing money, or addictions are what one should be willing to overcome. If you accept you have any of these major flaws and need help to overcome them, then you need to seek help. There are professionals who can help out, provided you are a willing party to the process. Improvement will come only if you are willing to change. Remember that flaws are easy to acknowledge and to change;the only thing required is the desire within you to do so.
Building self confidence by improving body languageSo what have they told you? That only physically attractive people have the right to self-confidence? That you either have it in you or you don't? Let's face it, confidence is the key to anything and everything. Right from driving a car to handling work to dating, confidence is what separates the proverbial wheat from the chaff. What you need to remember is that the mind speaks the body language. Conversely if you change your body language, then it has an impact on the mind as well. Mr.Hunched Over This guy is the classic example of a person who just doesn't like himself. The world is a mighty dangerous place for him. Just look at the way he walks. Shoulders all hunched over, head down as he shuffles rather than walk. Mr. Hunched Over generally finds it difficult to look people in the eye as he speaks and he last is handshake is as limp as his mind. He crosses his arms tightly, touches his nose all the time to see if it has grown since he lied through it. Mr. Walk the Walk and Talk the Talk This chap is diametrically the opposite of the first kind. He exudes an air of confidence in his walk, manner and speech. He has a confident stride which is helped by the fact that he stands to his height with his head held high, chin tucked in and shoulders squared back. This is what gives him the confidence as this posture is designed for efficiency. Mind you, he isn't ram rod straight, just straight enough so that his ears are in line with his shoulders and hips. The chest is also out since the shoulders are drawn back towards the hip. This facilitates deep, even and diaphragmatic breathing which prevents anxiety. His hand shake is firm. As he offers his hand, he exerts just the right pressure on the other person's hand to indicate a strong grip. This is no wrestling bout, so the confident man always exerts just the right kind of pressure in a hand shake.  He maintains eye contact with the person he is talking to; not a staring about, but normal eye contact, one which won't make the other person conscious of being stared at. He looks away from time to time to give his eyeballs a rest. This is why he comes across as genuine and not shift eyed and restless. To be Mr.-Or- Ms. Walk the Walk Always square your shoulders and keep your head held high when you walk. You might seem imperious or high handed at first, but then it will work wonders on your self-esteem and you will begin to feel differently about yourself. You needn't even be a tall person to come across as cool and confident-just stand up to your own height and see the miracle. Breathe slowly steadily and deeply. Use your abdominal muscles to draw in your breath rather than engaging your neck muscles which end up making you a shallow breather and plus you also tend to hunch easily if you don't feel your rib cage and stomach expand as you breathe in. Practice standing and speaking in front of the mirror. It will show you exactly how you appear to others. Practice your walk in front of a video camera and keep a record of your metamorphosis.
Aerobics: dancing your way to healthAerobic exercise is any comprehensive activity that makes you breathe hard while exercising your large muscle groups at a standard, even pace. The body uses stored carbohydrates and fats for energy. What is aerobics? Aerobic literally means having or providing oxygen or an activity that takes place only in the presence of oxygen. What is aerobic exercise? Aerobic exercise is any comprehensive activity that makes you breathe hard while exercising your large muscle groups at a standard, even pace. The body burns stored carbohydrates and fats for energy. Thus aerobic exercises help the body to utilize oxygen efficiently with increase in respiration and heart rate. What are the best ways to do aerobic exercises? There are number of ways by which you can exercise aerobically. Some easy and best ways are: walking, running, biking, using stationary bike, using stair stepper, elliptical machines or rowing machines, or joining an aerobic exercise class Benefits of aerobic exercises Fat reduction: Aerobics burns calories and body fats directly while using oxygen to produce energy. So this is the healthiest way to get rid of extra fat.  Strong heart: Aerobic exercises not only use your larger muscle groups like hamstrings, but also strengthen the heart muscles. This improves heart function resulting in improvement of blood and oxygen supply to all body parts, which provides healthy nourishment to body cell and removes toxins. Improves breathing: Exercises improve your lung capacity and function,which improves oxygenation, or competence of respiratory system to deliver oxygen to all body parts. It also improves overall health of the respiratory system. Cholesterol control: LDL cholesterol is bad cholesterol mostly responsible for clogging of arteries and HDL is good cholesterol. Aerobic exercises invariable increase the amount of HDL and lower LDL cholesterol thus preventing fat deposition and plaque formation and maintaining optimal blood supply to heart. Other benefits: Aerobics is the best exercise when it comes to prevention of various diseases like hypertension, diabetes, stroke and arthritis and osteoporosis. It helps to keep mood elevated and cures depression and boosts immunity. Make sure to incorporate some form of aerobic exercise in your daily routine.  
Beating the weight loss plateauThere comes a stage when you stop losing any weight in spite of strict exercise and diet regimen. This is called as weight loss plateau. When calorie intake is reduced along with exercise, the energy required is obtained from stored fat which eventually leads to weight loss. This rate of weight loss slows down and eventually stops once body reaches its set point of metabolism. This set point varies from person to person. So what can you do next? Here are some easy ways to get the weighing scale budging: Modify diet pattern: Metabolism slows down with lowering calorie intake. To reset metabolism, you need to have an adequate amount of calories. This can be done by including fruits and vegetables, whole grains, and proteins in diet. More energy is needed to burn proteins than carbohydrates or fats. Eat within half an hour or hour after exercising. Add proteins and carbohydrates to diet. Sip water: Increase total water intake in a day. Drink water before, during and after exercise and throughout the day. Change the workout: Change the exercises you do daily. Muscles get accustomed to a routine workout. Switching exercises and continually challenging helps burn more fat and build lean tissue. Change the type and time or duration of exercise. Try cycling instead of running if you have been doing it for long. Running, swimming, dancing, and Pilates too are good options. Skipping and brisk walking help in burning calories too and break the plateau. In the gym, change the exercise or number of repetitions. If you have been working on machines for long, try weight training or floor exercises. Take rest: Adequate rest is essential for the body to rejuvenate. Muscles, tendons, and ligaments get slight internal and external injuries which can be healed by rest. Proper rest helps repair and regenerate the tissue and makes them strong. Make these changes and get the needle on that weighing scale to budge.
A fine spine - Common disorders of the spineThe spine is made up of small bones called vertebrae that are stacked one upon the other. When viewed from the side, the normal spine has gentle curves to it. Because the spine is a complex structure and happens to be at the center of all our activities, it is subjected to a lot of diseases. A common misconception of low backache is that you should rest. In fact, rest is not recommended at all. Keep up with light non-strenuous activities after the symptoms have subsided. Given here are a few common conditions of the spine: Loss of curvature: The spine, when seen sideways has gentle curves to it. The curves, when lost, can lead to pain and imperfect posture. Kyphosis and Scoliosis are the commonest form of spine curvature abnormalities.Kyphosis is the abnormal and excessive curving of the upper part of the spine. It is commonly called as a hump. It may be present since birth or may develop during the teenage years. The most common symptoms seen are a hump, back pain and muscle stiffness. The pain remains constant and does not worsen over time. If the curvature is too much, then the thoracic cage may get compressed and pressed for space. This may cause cardio-thoracic problems like chest pain, shortness of breath and even death. Compression of spinal nerves may cause loss of bladder and bowel control, loss of sensation and muscle weakness. Kyphosis is treated with physiotherapy, anti-inflammatory drugs and in severe cases, with bracing.Scoliosis is the side-to-side curvature that occurs during growth spurts before puberty. It may also be caused by spinal cord injuries and arthritis. Scoliosis develops gradually. The symptoms seen are usually by people other than the patient, where they may notice a slight slouch while walking. At times it may be seen that clothes that used to fit earlier are now ill-fitting. The pants seem to have shortened on one side. The curvature if mild responds well to physiotherapy. Physiotherapy is also useful as it helps to stretch and strengthen the muscles. This helps in stopping the progression of curvature. Severe cases require bracing and even surgical intervention with rods, hooks, wires and screws to correct the curvature. Sciatica: Sciatica is a condition that arises when the sciatic nerve is pressed upon. This condition arises when a degenerated vertebra presses upon the disc below it, or when there is a disc prolapse.  Abnormally tight piriformis muscle of the buttocks and a tumor in the spine may also cause sciatic pain. The hallmark symptom is the characteristic pain along the leg that starts from the hip and radiates all the way down. The pain is worsened by sitting and tingling numbness also develops. Treatment includes anti-inflammatory medicines and physiotherapy. Spondylolisthesis: When the spine is subjected to the pressures of daily activity, there is a lot of wear and tear that goes on in the vertebrae. This may cause the vertebra to move forward and slide on the vertebra below it. As a result, you may experience a constant backache. Spondylolisthesis can be congenital, it may occur due to trauma to the vertebral column, due to a tumor in the vertebra or due to degenerative changes in the vertebra and cartilage as a result of diseases like arthritis. Low backache is the hallmark of this disease. The pain is typically worse after any exercise that involves the lower back. The motions of low back are restricted and if there is nerve compression then tingling and numbness along the leg may also be seen.Rest and avoiding exertion of back muscles helps reduce the symptoms. Physiotherapy helps in restoring the strength and improving the range of motions. Spinal Stenosis: Degenerative diseases like osteoarthritis cause development of bone spurs in the vertebral column leading to its narrowing. This puts pressure on the nerves and leads to pain and tingling and numbness. Cervical Spondylosis: This condition occurs due to degenerative changes in the vertebrae of the neck region. Commonly seen as neck stiffness with pain that radiates all the way down the arm.  The pain occurs as the nerves get compressed by disc prolapse or bone outgrowths in the vertebra. Treatment includes neck immobilization, cervical traction, medications for pain and physiotherapy. Ways to reduce spine problems and backache are: Quit smoking Adopt a perfect posture Do exercises that will strengthen your core, lower back muscles and abs. Do not ignore or overlook the pains. Consult your doctor at the earliest. Spinal problems are the ones that are frequently overlooked. Ignoring the symptoms may lead to worsening of the problem. See your doctor at the earliest to be safe. The spine is the backbone of our body, in the true sense of the word. It is up to us to keep our spine in good condition as an unhealthy spine will interfere with almost all our body functions.
Dos and don s during heat crampsHeat cramps can affect people who exercise or work in the heat. It could be due to dehydration, so if you are going to be active in the heat then you need to drink a lot of water even if you are not thirsty. Before going out, find out what the temperature is and do not exercise outdoors in the heat. Heat cramps may not be as serious as heat exhaustion or heat stroke, but the condition needs to be treated with the same urgency. People who are on low-sodium diets may be affected more than others. Heat cramps may seem mild, but they can be the first sign of heat exhaustion, so pay attention and stop all activity, and rest. Here is what you can do and what you should avoid if you suffer from heat cramps: Dos : If you have muscle spasms and the muscles are unable to function properly, then immediately stop all activity. Get inside a room or go into the shade and take some rest. Raise the feet to 12 inches above the body. Gently massage and stretch the muscles. Wet a paper towel or handkerchief and drape it around your face, at the back of your neck and underarms. Drink a clear natural juice or a sports drink to get the electrolyte balance back. Do not go out in the sun again even if the spasms have subsided. If the cramps last more than an hour then go to a doctor. If you are on a low-sodium diet then tell the doctor about it. Don s : Don take any painkillers or fever tablets as they could cause harm. Avoid caffeine, alcohol, and sugary soda drinks. Don rub alcohol on the muscles. Don drink ice cold drinks as they can cause stomach cramping. Don take salt tablets unless the doctor has prescribed them. Don do your full quota of exercises if the heat is getting on to you. Don stop drinking water even if you do not feel thirsty. Don resume any strenuous activity for several hours after a heat cramp. Prevention:Prevention is always better, so it’s a good idea to reduce exercise in the summer, especially when it is extremely hot. If people are working outside, like construction workers, then they must take more breaks, keep their heads covered and sip on water after every 10 minutes to prevent heat cramps. Always plan ahead and get acclimatized if you know you have to do a physical activity in the heat that could cause sweating. If you are an athlete, then do take a mix of sports drink, water, and juices to maintain the electrolyte balance. Always carry water with you if you are playing any sport in the heat. All events must be planned at a time when the heat is bearable and not when it is too hot. Keep a close watch on the person if there are signs of vomiting and nausea along with flushed skin. Rush them to the hospital.
Smoking causes impotence!Men who smoke heavily are twice as likely to suffer from impotence or erectile dysfunction. The link between smoking and ED has been established beyond reasonable doubt. Smoking causes a hardening of the arteries or blood vessels. For a penis to grow erect or tumescent there has to be a healthy blood supply. Now imagine the cross-section of a smoker's penis where there are plenty of blockages and hardening of the blood vessels. Can the penis then grow erect with so many hindrances to the blood? There is also an acute loss of sensitivity to the penis which is a direct contribution of smoking! Previously, alcohol was a hot favorite of the medical lobby when it came to 'impotence.' Wish smokers could say the same thing about moderate smoking! Even moderate smoking can make an existing condition of impotence worse. One could make changes to one's lifestyle and diet and curb stress to treat ED (erectile dysfunction), but all these will come to naught unless one really resolves to give up smoking permanently. Just within a few hours of kicking the butt, the body starts to repair itself. Of course, it may take longer for the blood vessels to actually undo the blockages and have a free run for the penis, but it will certainly happen, slowly and surely. Smokers may have an underlying condition of anxiety, which is made worse by nicotine, which in turn causes performance anxiety, not greatly helped by blocked blood arteries. So smoking not just makes you physically impotent, but also mentally impotent too. It is a powerful narcotic which is hateful to the body and spiteful to its salubrity. Please enroll into a 'stop smoking now' campaign with the help of friends or family. Check for any 'nicotine anonymous' programs in your neighborhood or just do it all by yourself. Otherwise, the only thing hard about your penis will be hardened arteries and lots of hard luck!
Is sex linked to self esteem?Man is a curious creature, full of quirks and contradictions. Sexual intercourse, something that most people consider an intimate and private experience, is spoken about in hushed tones and often, with some discomfort. We don't reveal or talk about our sexual desires, as readily we discuss our salary packages or food habits. This is quite ironic seeing how sex is an important gauge for a person's self esteem and also an indicator of his/her social desirability. The very thing that we do under covers, we somehow choose to "keep under cover". The Link between Sex and Self Esteem: Self esteem is an important factor that determines the mental & physical well-being of an individual. All of us have a craving to be understood, liked and appreciated; and these form the equivalent of our basic needs on the inverted pyramid- Food, clothing and shelter. For a human being to flourish and prosper, consumable food, without the mental food of appreciation, is not enough; and sexual intercourse or an intimacy with the opposite sex, is one way of validating that need. Sex therefore, ceases to be just a physical need instilled by nature for the perpetuation of the species, but goes into the larger emotional cum psychological dimension of self actualization and realization. Though some of us might be embarrassed to broach the topic of 'whether or not we are getting enough', the truth is that every human seeks to achieve his sexual potential, even while he or she might, not be aware of it. Most of us have the ability to get the foods matching our taste preferences onto our plates, but with sex, this could be a little difficult, since sex, is a complex subject with a lot of social, moral and religious links. The truth is evident in the number of marriages (the very cornerstones of civil society) that fail on the basis of sexual compatibility, either by setting unrealistic sexual expectations or by not owning up to, or even identifying, one's sexual needs. This has repercussions on the psyche and self-esteem of a person, and this is especially true in the case of men in particular, as they may feel completely inferior for not being able to attract a sexual partner matching his desires. In some people, this also leads to a case of self-loathing, for having sexual needs which a partner doesn't understand, or much worse, needs which are considered taboo and sinful (Homosexuality, Anal Sex, Group Sex, Fetishes, etc.) These complex emotions can wreak  havoc on a person's self-esteem, by creating severe internal conflicts and serious self-doubts. Now socially, sex can either liberate a person, or hold him prisoner. At times, the unfulfilled needs may get repressed and banished to the shadows, only to be played out later, in the form of sexual adventurism and crime. Just one look at the sexual crimes in our society today, and we can clearly understand just how healthy our collective self esteem is! The very society that frowns upon prostitution, is actually responsible for creating it, though everybody would like to pretend otherwise. The crux of the matter is that "sex" and "self esteem" are closely related; and one should not shy away from addressing any issues one might face regarding one's sexuality. Physical love is necessary for the survival of a relationship and one needs to make time and efforts to successfully create one's own sexual space. The positive effects of a good sex life can be seen in an increased work productivity, fewer illnesses and an increase in one's overall efficiency. Some people are haunted by sexual guilt and confusion and when they keep it all locked up, they suffer from unexplained physical pains and feel 'down in the dumps' mentally. Another problem with appreciation from the opposite sex, is the addiction to  external validation. Some people feel utterly worthless until they receive positive feedback about their looks or abilities on a regular basis. This can be downright devastating, as in these cases, there is a great dependence on external factors for one to feel good. While no one denies the "feel good factor" of sexual appreciation, it is up to each one of us, to decide just how much of control one must be giving to external factors, to determine our personal self-esteem. The appreciation may be theirs, but the esteem is entirely of the self and only the self can decide how much of appreciation and sex is enough.
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