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Career advice for menGetting a job these days is extremely difficult. What is even more difficult is sticking around long enough at the job. No one is indispensable, and if you don't perform well, there are hundreds more waiting to get the job! Being the bread winner, men have to face this pressure more. Here are some tips that would do you good, if followed: Cracking The Interview: The golden rule here is to be honest. The interviewers do not want to hear what will please them; So, do not try to butter them up. They are also put off by boasting . Therefore, be honest about your views and opinions. Age:wise Attitude- When you are young, and have just entered the company, it is highly advisable to observe and learn as much as you can. Find yourself a professional mentor who can guide you. Try and build on your professional presence. Be active, spend more time with your boss, be helpful to your juniors. The golden advice for all, irrespective of seniority, is to stay clear of office gossip and politics. Keep a check on the attitude: There is no need to be arrogant, and a know-it-all. Be friendly, confident, and genuine. Learn to say no: You need to have a pleasing personality. But, avoid trying to please all. Try and learn the art of saying no firmly. Too much of 'yes' will make people take you for granted, and you will find yourself overloaded with a lot of work. Do not under price yourself: If you feel that you deserve a raise, go ahead and ask for it. Do not be afraid to ask for your worth. Often at interviews, employers cancel out candidates who under price themselves, as it shows that they will probably not perform to the expected levels. Blow your trumpet: With all humility make sure you take what is rightfully yours. If you don't take credit for the work, no one will give it to you. Worse, someone else may take it! Create boundaries: Keep your work at office. Do not bring work home. Often at the outset, to please bosses, one ends up working overtime or worse, working at home. It is important to keep both the parts of your lives separate. Keep fit too: Don't let your job take a toll on your health. Working late, sitting at the same place for hours, can be harmful for the heart. Learn to unwind periodically. Setting goals is easy. What is needed is the determination to follow the rules you have set for yourself. The way to success at work is taking the ladder, one step at a time. There is no elevator here.
Fashion tips for tall menRead on for the few tips which shall help you strike that perfect look always! No more tears for the "trousers" Trousers for tall men that you get in the market are too ill-fitting. They end up making you look "Too big for your pants", or "Too thin for your pants". The easy solution would be to choose a brand for your trousers, after proper research, and stick to it. Your quick checkpoints in this case can be: Your large thigh areas always make you look humongous. Hence, try to get a good and appropriate fit for your thighs. A small amount of flare in your lower legs can give you a good look, but that should go well with the texture and look of the trouser. Last but not the least, avoid loose fitting, or baggy pants. They will just make you look too thin, and tall always. Scare away the " shirt" hassles Have you picked up a T-shirt which lets your waistline be visible, the moment you move your hand a bit? That's a usual problem every tall guy faces. Try a few of these solutions, and see the results: If you are a tall and bulky person, then pick up a long double XL T-shirt, fitting you well. If you are a thin and tall person, then pick up a T-shirt which is long enough for your height, and then get it tailored for the perfect fit. Polo neck T-shirts can make you look too skinny. Try to get a formal shirt which fits you well, and is long enough to be worn tucked in. For tall people, tucking in the shirt helps them flaunt their height pretty well. You can also try and get the formal shirt fitted by a tailor, if you find it too big for your size. Forget the "Jacket" jeopardy Jackets and waist coats are the biggest gifts for all the tall guys out there. But how, and what to wear is the major turning point here as well. Complete your formal look with a waist coat. This shall make you look well built, and compliment your height as well. Blazers can be an option, for both the formal and informal look. Pick up a blazer which fits your broad shoulders well. A jeans, a t-shirt, and a jacket can be a killer combination. Go for earthy colors, as they give you a more masculine look compared to other colors. Tipping the "Tie"& Bolting the "Belts" Try to match the right clothes with the right accessories. Let's start off with the tie. Now, for tall men, getting a tie will be a pain. Always try the tie you are buying, and see if it comes till your waistline. You should also try to pick up a bit broader ties, as they make your chest look broader. When it comes to belts, try to pick up the big, horizontal buckles. Choose simple, horizontal buckles for the formal wear. For the informal look, however, you can experiment with other big buckles available. Watches Tall men with long hands and fingers should try to wear a big dial watch. This gives your fingers and arms a bulky look. Choose colors like gray, and black most of the time, as it makes you look more masculine. So, a few simple steps can make you flaunt your height. As the saying goes: "Wear your style; do not search for it in the stores. Your attitude is what matters the most to complete your look."
Pamper the newborn without forgetting yourselfIf you are a new mom, chances are you are busy 24/7. The baby's complete dependence on you helps you bond with him/her and makes you aware of the responsibility that is now on you. But, your own health is an equally important responsibility. So, you need to give yourself permission to take care, or even pamper yourself from time to time. Here are simple ways for you to look out for yourself. Eat your favorite breakfast: As your day starts, you need fuel to keep your energy levels high. So, grab your hands on healthy and tasty breakfast options like whole grain cereal, skim milk and sliced strawberries or a banana. The combination of lean protein, whole-grain foods, and nutrient-rich fruit allows the brain to form more feel-good chemicals. Don't let stress come near you: We know that a lot of changes in your life have transpired, due to the entry of a baby in your world. The difficulty to cope with the changes may cause stress and depression. Try to avoid stress by asking for your husband's and relatives' support. Take a walk with your baby: Walking with your baby in nearby parks will give you fresh air and it is an excellent form of exercise. Don't be sleep deprived: Having a baby doesn't mean that you have to always sacrifice your sleep. Never miss an opportunity to sleep or take rest. This will keep your energy levels high for the day. Sleep when your baby sleeps. Delegate baby care: Parenting is not your sole responsibility. Ask your husband to lend a hand in taking care of the baby for some time. Not just the husband, if you live in a joint family, you can ask other relatives for help as well. Don't be a multi-tasking person: We know a woman has so many roles to play. But, it doesn't always have to be that way. Being a new mom, you must focus on one activity at a time. You can prioritize your tasks, if you have a lot of things to do. Exercise regularly: Add exercise to your daily routine. Choose the exercise which you love and enjoy, like walking, cycling, yoga, swimming or aerobic dance. Consult a doctor before starting any exercise program.    
Breast lumps- myths busted!The rise in the occurrence of breast cancer in women, since past decade or so, has made women, especially in the urban areas, very cautious about lumps in their breasts. Whenever there is a small lump in the breast, the first thought that comes to mind, is may be this is cancerous. However, instead of taxing your brain with worries, it is better to take action and consult your caregiver. Here are some of the myths that are regularly associated with breast lumps and the real facts related to the same. Myth: If there is a breast lump, it must be cancerous Statistics reveal that out of 10 cases of breast lumps in women, only 2 are cancerous. More often, these lumps are due to fibroadenoma or cysts. In many women, lumps are formed during the menstrual cycle and they go away after it ends. It is not simply possible to tell exactly what kind of lump it is, just by feeling through hands. However, it is important to detect the composition of the lump and to do so at the initial stages, so that if it is detected cancerous, early diagnosis and treatment can save your life. Myth: If your mammogram is normal, you are safe and the lumps are not cancerous This is not particularly true. To detect the presence of cancerous cells, you need to get more tests done; an ultrasound, an MRI and also a follow up mammogram, to get a second view of the lump. Doctors also suggest a biopsy to be 100 percent sure of the diagnosis. If the lumps persist but there is no detection, your doctor may ask you to keep doing the tests at frequent intervals, to assess the development. Myth: Malignant breast lumps do not cause any pain Although breast cancer patients do not suffer from much pain, this does not mean that if you do not have pain, the lump is non-cancerous. There are different types of breast cancers; and in some types such as the inflammatory breast cancer, the patient can suffer from warmth, tenderness, redness and swelling, followed by pain in the lumps. Myth: If you get a lump while breastfeeding, it is not cancerous It is true that breastfeeding reduces the chances of development of cancerous cells. But there is still a possibility and hence you should not ignore the formation of lumps. It is advisable to immediately get an ultrasound to confirm the condition of the lump. Myth: Lump in young women cannot be cancerous Women can develop breast cancer at any age. Hence, if you have a breast lump at a young age, or even if your teenage daughter has developed a suspicious lump in her breast, you should always get it checked, at the earliest. Most often, cancer develops in the breast when women are past their menopause period. But this, in no way means, that they cannot get it at younger age. Myth: Only a larger lump can be cancerous, not a smaller one Lumps in the breasts can be of all sizes; and the size, does not determine the presence of cancerous cells. According to breast-imaging specialist at New York's Manhattan Diagnostic Radiology, Melissa Scheer MD, you must immediately see a doctor, whenever you feel the presence of even a tiny lump, because, a small lump too may turn out to be aggressively cancerous. Most often, the lump in the breast is non-cancerous; however, it is advisable to consult your caregiver immediately, once you discover the lump for the first time.
Activities to help your toddler talkWe understand how eager parents are to talk to their kid. They want to hear their soft voice and babble talks. So start teaching them as soon as possible to help them to speak fast and clear. Here are some activities which will help you to teach your kid to talk. The playful ways: The best way of teaching your kid to speak is to, well,play. Most of the learning is done through playing. Be a child with your child. Act playfully foolish --kids enjoy that a lot. And when the kid is happy and in playful mood, they try to talk. Building vocabulary: Use a word in more than one sentence to make them understand the meaning of the word. For example, 'The color of leaves is green' and 'Your father is wearing a green colored shirt.' If the kids hear a word used often in different sentences, it becomes a permanent part of their vocabulary. Give them practical examples: Teach them the names of the things they see around. Or get actual objects and be descriptive to teach them the name of the object and talk about the object's features. Use a toy phone: You must have seen kids trying to talk over phone to their dads or friends. They try to copy you the way you talk over phone. It can be a great way to teach them to speak. Pretend that you are talking to the kid's dad or grandparents, and pass over the phone to the kid and encourage them to chitchat over the phone. Story telling: Kids listen to the stories very carefully. Show them the pictures in the storybook and describe them with the story. Then repeat the same story the next day. Ask your child if she/he remembers what was there in the story by showing them the picture. Help them if they get stuck. Sing together with the child: Music is another amusing way to teach the child to speak. Listen to a song, sing and dance along. Encourage the child to dance and sing with you. Children are great at learning lyrics of a song. Reward the child on completing a task: When you reward the child with his/her favourite toy or snack, they understand the benefit of performing the task. And they take effort to get the reward. Ask your child to recite a poem for you, or speak a certain word or sentence and entice the child by showing him the reward he will get on completing the task.  
Lost in wonderland? - Absentmindedness!The Daily Telegraph reports that on an average every adult in UK forgets three things per day. Forgetfulness is a human tendency. If this absentmindedness or forgetfulness is limited to forgetting three to five things per day, then it can be left unattended. However, if you or a near one is facing a lot of trouble in your daily life due to this habit or problem, you should immediately have a consultation with your doctor. Mystery behind Absentmindedness According to Maria Jonsdottir, an investigating neuropsychologist from Iceland, absentmindedness is the mental lapses that usually happen in connection with the actions that are routine or well-rehearsed. You can perform these actions without any need to be careful. This includes regular actions such as squeezing out toothpaste or moisturizer from the tube. These action slips are very common and if you observe carefully, you do forget some such regular things every day unknowingly. Psychologists believe that an individual makes such mental lapses around 30 times in every week. On an average, the nervous system of a human brain runs quite efficiently. However, sometimes temporary fault may develop that may make you use incorrect word or slip to your native tongue while conversing. This does not mean however, that something is wrong with your brain. When the team of Jonsdottir surveyed around 200 people, they found out that on an average the slips are 6.4 per week although the number also greatly depends upon the gender, intelligence level, and age. One startling fact that was discovered is that most of the events of forgetfulness occurred before 8 p.m. that means people tend to forget more during the daytime than in the evening. Apart from a momentary lapse in the functioning of brain efficiency, other reasons that can lead to increase in the incidents of forgetfulness are high stress levels, mobile phones, e-mails, and busy lifestyles. Today, people are pressed for time and they have more work at hand than time and that has increased the occurrence of forgetfulness. Types of Absentmindedness A team of neuropsychologists has divided these mental lapses into five categories. The most common are the storage failures in which people cannot recall what they had planned for a particular occasion or they can recall the action, but cannot remember for whom it was meant. Another category is test failures in which people come back home to check whether they have turned the light off and find out that they have already done so. Discrimination failure is another category of absentmindedness wherein you for a moment fail to identify the difference between your things and others'. During the study, a male participant accepted that he picked up the jacket of his female partner thinking it to be his own. Sometimes you put books in the dustbin and the trash on the shelf and laugh at your behavior a moment later when you find out what you have done. This is discrimination failure. Another mix-up includes program assembly failure wherein you put salt in the tea instead of sugar or you just do not keep the right things at the right place. The fifth one is the sub-routine failure wherein you go to the market to buy tea and instead come back home with coffee. The research proves one thing that if you are absentminded, it does not mean that you have a bad memory or can suffer from dementia as is widely publicized in the media. It is perfectly all right to forget or being an absentminded person. Sometimes the incidences of absentmindedness can increase due to fatigue. A good sleep and rest can fix the problem easily.
Afraid of the dark? understand your fear and cure it!Scotophobia, more commonly known as Nycotophobia, is a psychological illness, where the patient is afraid of the dark. Children are more prone to this fear, though it does affect quite a few adults as well. The dark often represents insecurity and uncertainty to children, and it symbolizes their entrance into an unknown territory. If the children are alone during their first few encounters with darkness, the absence of parents (who exemplify safety), tends to amplify this crippling fear. While most of us do actually possess this fear in relatively small amounts, as we grow up the fear diminishes. However, there are those of us who might carry this fear of the dark into their adulthood and in such cases, the fear is usually accompanied by quite a few intricate issues. People often tend to externalize a set of conflicting feelings about a certain situation, towards something else. For instance, you might be worried about your children; but your mind may externalize this fear, via your inefficiency at work. This process is called externalization. So, when it comes to the root of your fear of darkness, it is possible that at some point in your past, you experienced something untoward, which through externalization, inculcated this fear of darkness, deep into your psyche. Evolutionary Ties to Darkness: Many scientists have pointed out that this phobia might be linked to the process of evolution. Since predators hunt for their prey at night, we might have inherited this fear of darkness from our ancestors, who believed that darkness was a space where they could be attacked by wild animals. However, recent studies have shown that  Scotophobia begins at approximately the age of two in children, and thus, it cannot be said to be innate to us. In a study done by Ryerson University involving over 90 students, it was found that people who are afraid of the dark, are more likely to be poor sleepers, than those who are not afraid of it. More interestingly, it was discovered that any kind of noise made while the people with this phobia were asleep, frightened them the most.. Symptoms of Scotophobia: The first symptoms of this fear are the resistance to visit dark places and the yearning for company when such situations arise. However, many a times adults who are suffering from this fear, do not reveal it due to the added fear of embarrassment and this, sometimes, results in outbursts of rage when they are forced to go out for an event at night, or to confront the dark under any such circumstances. A person battling this fear may experience panic attacks, sweating and trembling prior to, or while staying in the dark. The blood pressure also rises, accompanied by chest pain and lastly, a difficulty in breathing. Diagnosis of Scotophobia: In children, this fear can be easily verified by their behaviour. However, adults might require further assistance, due to their natural resistance to openly admit to such a fear. Scotophobia can be diagnosed through a comprehensive psychiatric evaluation. Following this, your psychologist would be able to give you an idea of the source of your fear as well. Pursue a course of treatment immediately after the discovery of the phobia, which will ensure a faster and more effective recovery. Treatment of Scotophobia: The process of 'desensitization' is most commonly used to help with such a phobia. In this form of treatment, the patient is slowly exposed to the object of fear, in a situation where she/he will not feel vulnerable. This is done by asking the patient to confront the dark along with another individual who symbolizes safety for him/her. This could be a parent or a friend. Night lights can also be installed to gradually reduce the fear. You may try certain breathing exercises, which will reduce the panic attacks that accompany this fear. Hypnosis has also been said to be very effective in dealing with this phobia. If your psychologist sees fit, you might be also prescribed some medicines; antidepressants are given in some cases. Joining a self-help group is also a good option, in addition to your psychological treatment.  
Muscle build up dietYou may think that you need fatty foods to bulk up, but this is not true. Fatty foods will do just that make you fat. Lean meats, fruits and vegetables will actually build muscle. Take a balanced diet of vegetables and lean meats to achieve your muscle building goals. Changing your diet to build muscle will help with your overall health. Eating food that helps build muscle will ensure that you are not wasting all that hard work you are doing in the gym. Workout utilizes considerable energy. Food is the only way to replace this energy. So what happens if you fail to eat the right type of food to build muscle mass? It will take longer to build muscle, and it may even prevent muscle building altogether once you reach a certain point. Is protein important or not? You bet it is. Protein provides the building blocks to build that muscle. What types of protein are best? Chicken, eggs, steak (with the fat cut off), fish, cheese (especially cottage cheese), and nuts are all great sources of protein. Finding out how much protein to eat when you are interested in building muscle fast is actually not difficult. First, you will need to find out your lean body mass weight in kilos, and then you simply multiply that figure by 2.75 to determine your daily protein requirement. Calculating your lean body mass uses some complex formulae, so ask a professional at the gym if you do not already have this figure. Carbohydrates, in moderation, are also essential when finding foods that build muscle. Do not eat too much, though, unless you choose high fibre carbohydrates, and then you can indulge in much larger amounts. High fibre carbs include rice, potatoes, oatmeal and bananas. Reducing fat in your diet is of course necessary to build bigger muscle on a body that appears lean and has a low body fat ratio. If you are focusing on what foods build muscle mass, you also need to bear in mind that it pays to reduce fat as well. Although proteins are essential, it is really important to select proteins that are low in fat, or that you can cut the fat off. So eat your chicken without the skin, and go for lean steaks rather than more fatty cuts of meat. Opting for cottage cheese or other reduced fat cheeses, and low fat milk also helps reduce your fat intake. You may argue that drinking has no effect on what to eat to build muscle. But you would be wrong. Hydration is critical to general health and wellbeing. Two litres of water a day is what most experts recommend for maintaining optimal health. To drink that amount, you need to drink up to 12 glasses of water a day, which is quite a lot. So start early in the day, and space your water consumption out throughout the day. Foods that build muscle are great and an essential component of your bodybuilding program. But do not be lulled into a false sense of security and think you can slow down on your workouts. Both bodybuilding exercises and bodybuilding diets are required to get a body to die for as quickly as you possibly can. Even if you are working on improving your physique slowly, you should combine a bodybuilding diet with bodybuilding workouts for best results. Sample Diet: 7:00am: Breakfast: 4 eggs + toast or oatmeal + milk with protein powder mixed in (a lot). 9:30am: Snack: 1 Meal replacement supplement + milk. 12:00: Lunch: Tuna sandwich (1 whole can) + green apple. 3:00pm: Snack:  2 Meal replacement supplement + milk. 5:30pm: Workout: Have water (or carb drink if you want), within 30 mins of end of workout (on workout days only) Meal replacement supplement + milk. (If you are going to have Creatine - put it in this Meal replacement supplement at the end of your workout). 8:30pm: Dinner: A chicken breast (aprox 8 oz + some rice or other starch carb + if you want also eat some veggies) Before Bed:  Meal replacement supplement + milk.
Hypertension and Vitamin DVitamin D is one of the essential vitamins that are required for strong and healthy bones. The body synthesizes it in the skin from cholesterol when there is adequate exposure to sunlight. Over the past decade, vitamin D has been intriguing medical researchers the world over. Several studies were conducted and interesting results found. One of them being that vitamin D may be implicated in influencing blood pressure levels. As per studies conducted, it was found that low levels of vitamin D lead to high blood pressure levels. People living in high altitudes where sunlight is at a minimum level were found to be hypertensive. Also, the winter season showed an increase in hypertension cases which was again attributed to the low sunlight levels. What exactly does vitamin D do to affect the blood pressure? Renin is an enzyme secreted by the kidneys that constricts the blood vessels and increases the blood pressure. Vitamin D acts by inhibiting this renin. Insulin resistance causes high blood pressure, which is why hypertension often has co-morbidity with diabetes mellitus. Vitamin D helps in improving the body's sensitivity to insulin. Calcium deposits on the arterial walls harden them and make them lose their elasticity leading to an increase in the pressure of blood flowing through them. Vitamin D helps the body to better absorb and metabolize the calcium. The role of vitamin D in strengthening bones is very clear. Though the studies have shown that people having deficiency in vitamin D tend to develop hypertension, the role of vitamin D in this case is still not very clear. Also, whether vitamin D supplements help in lowering blood pressure levels is still to be found out! But all said and done, the research findings cannot be ignored. Moreover, a morning walk is beneficial in many other ways as well! So, get up early, put on your walking shoes and say Hello to the sun! Vitamin D alone will not help you control your BP. You need to keep taking the medications along with the other dietary and life-style changes! An early morning walk is a blessing for the whole day!
Treating sore throatTest and diagnosisPatients with sore throat are examined by ENT specialists. At first, the doctor performs a local examination of throat. Clinical examination usually guides the doctor towards diagnosis. Although in order to confirm the diagnosis, the doctor may ask for culture and sensitivity test of the throat swab. Treatment Home remedies: Mild cases of sore throat are usually cured by home remedies. Following remedial measures can be adopted at home: Warm saline gargle – Gargle with warm saline water helps to relieve the discomfort and irritation of the throat. Half to one teaspoonful of salt is added to one full glass of warm water and the patient is advised to gargle. This process may be repeated 3 to 4 times a day to have a soothing effect on throat. Additionally, smoking and use of other tobacco products must be avoided. The patient must drink adequate amount of fluids. Warm liquid and semi-solid food must be consumed to provide a soothing effect on the throat. Cough lozenges to help relieve irritation and pain in the throat. Seeking advice of the doctor: If the signs and symptoms persist and are not adequately controlled by home remedies, the patient must seek advice of a specialist doctor. Viral infections usually do not require treatment. They are usually cured in 5 to 7 days. Bacterial infections require treatment as per the advice of a specialist doctor. Bacterial infections may require treatment by antibiotics. The treating doctor selects an antibiotic which is suitable for the patient depending on factors such as the age of the patient, report of the culture and sensitivity of throat swab, previous drug history of the patient, etc. Antibiotics usually effective in bacterial infection with sore throat are from the group of penicillins, cephalosporins, and macrolides. PreventionViral and bacterial infections are contagious. Good hygienic lifestyle and habits help prevent infections. Following things to be noted are: Frequent and thorough hand washes before consumption of food, after using toilet, and after sneezing and coughing. Use of a hand sanitizer during consumption of food outside home. Avoid sharing food and drinks from same glasses and utensils. Use a tissue paper or handkerchief while sneezing and coughing. Avoid close contact with patients with sore throat. If sore throat develops, few home remedies may prove to be curative. If sore throat persists, advice of a specialist doctor must be sought.
Challenges faced by homosexual parentsThe major challenge in front of gay parents is to face society and protect their children from social prejudice and discrimination. Gay people can never have their own children, and hence, often opt for adoption. But, how can a couple, who is discriminated against by society, provide a healthy upbringing to a child? However, in some cases, gay parents are known to have capably given their child, all the love and care and the basic amenities that they need, for a wholesome and proper development. Sexual Orientation and Parenting In the American society, same sex parenting is more common than in other parts of the world. Even then, children of gay parents have to face many more challenges than the children with heterosexual parents. The U.S. Census report of 2000 has reported that around 22 percent gay couples and 33 percent lesbian couples have around 18 children living with them. The trend of adoption amongst gay people has been increasing over the years, despite the overwhelming challenges. According to a report published in June 2012 by the American Psychological Association, no scientific evidence has proven that sexual orientation can affect parenting effectiveness. This means that both lesbian as well as gay parents can indeed provide a healthy and supportive environment for raising their children. Major Challenges The major difference lies in the treatment that the children of gay parents get in society. They have to face discrimination and prejudice from schools, their peers and even within their own families. Gay or lesbian parents on the other hand, face the dilemma of how to explain to their children why they have two mothers, or two fathers. Many people in society, even those with strong educational backgrounds, are of the opinion that being gay or lesbian, is an illness due to which, they are incapable of being adequate parents. There is also a misconception that lesbian women tend to be less motherly than heterosexual women. But no scientific basis has been found to support these beliefs. Although the medical community does not consider homosexuality as a psychological disorder, society continues to have a biased outlook towards gay parents. Are Gay Parents Better than Heterosexual Parents? As of today, nothing can prove that gay partners are not as good parents as their heterosexual counterparts. Moreover, it has been found that people of the same sex divide their workload of raising the child, and hence, the childcare process is more smooth and satisfying. Some studies have even noted that lesbian or gay parents have superior parenting skills. But, again no scientific evidence has proven these observations, yet.
The earlier yearsSexual concerns experienced during the drastic body changes and feelings of adolescence are often carried into adulthood. Sexual desires are powerful and frequently go beyond the earlier popular forms of sexual expression - kissing, hugging and petting without being aware of the consequences. Anxiety the commonest case of erectile dysfunction is compounded by the present life style - get-togethers, parties, with alcohol and drugs, visits to sex workers or massage parlours which offer other sexual services leading to unplanned, unprotected sex. Consequently seen are unwanted pregnancy, abortions, drug addiction, sexually transmitted diseases, anxiety and depression leading sometimes to suicide. Males seem to have more concerns then females. A common concern is nocturnal emission (night fall, Swapana Dosh) of semen and length of penis. Nocturnal emission of spermatic fluid is falsely believed to weaken a person. Really all that's happening is that excess of sperms is being thrown out to make place for the new ones. The length of the penis troubles many. Young people fall prey to advertisements that claim to lengthen it. The fact of the matter is that a penis an erection of 2.5 wide (10cms) is enough for a sexual intercourse for a person who knows the art to satisfy a partner. Ignorance about masturbation is widely prevalent among males of all ages leading to guilt, anxiety, depression and at times to suicide. Older men erroneously think their cause of erectile dysfunction or premature ejaculation is masturbation. Masturbation is a highly pleasurable act in males. It does not harm the body or exhaust the sperms. In fact it is a safe way to satisfy. Females also masturbate but the percentage to men is much less. They also seem more comfortable with the activity. Masturbation has gone through years of superstition fear of ill effects, considered as a unhealthy practice and considered sin by some religions. Fifty or more years ago doctors and activities thought it caused harm to the body. It is said that corn flakes, the popular breakfast cereal was specifically formulated by Mr. Keleog to help a person not to masturbate. Today thinking has changed. It is now thought that it is an activity that does not cause any harm to the body. It does not finish all the vital sperms over the years so that it will not hinder having children in future. Its wide misuse is common. Persons use it indiscriminatingly when they cannot sleep, when they are tense for e.g. before an examination, some do it more than four to six times a day, which only indicates their immaturity. When done to satisfy a natural sexual urge it is a healthy activity. It keeps the person safe from infection and is said to teach the person skill for sexual intercourse. Technology has helped in many ways but sometimes it creates problems. A person hooked on to porno sites to arouse his desire is found to cause a loss of self confidence conflict with the partner sexual intimacy and intercourse. Before marriage or a partnership both male and female have concerns. Females if they have a previous partner but are getting married to another worry about the husband finding out of their loss of virginity, others worry about the size of their breasts, excessive hair on body or excessive fear of pain at intercourse. Men worry about whether their penis is long enough whether their long standing masturbation will hinder intercourse or prevent them of being a father. The absent hymen a false notion for virginity can be congenitally absent, split by exercise like swimming, cycling etc. or most commonly by masturbation. The hymen therefore is no proof of virginity. Learning to do with what they have making full use of their points and feeling comfortable and proud of their bodies help a lot to overcome the concern. Adopting a safe sex policy is best achieved by masturbation; avoiding sex with an unknown person and multiple partners; during intercourse with sex workers not using condoms every time and being careful of oral sex. Satisfying each other by caressing, hugging, kissing etc. with clothes on is safe; without clothes extra vaginal sex by mutual masturbation is safe with a trusted partner and finally not so safe is vaginal intercourse unless done with a condom correctly worn.
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