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Caught in the snore snare....A real nightmare!Snoring is caused due to obstructed air movement during breathing while sleeping. It may suggest an underlying medical problem like obstructive sleep apnea. Studies have also revealed a correlation between snoring and risk of heart attack. There are different reasons for snoring and to find out the exact reason and the right solution is important. Snoring affects the quality of sleep can cause irritability and fatigue. Snoring causes poor quality of sleep, irritability, lack of concentration the day after the deed. Snoring is a tad like fingerprints , no two sets are the same and so it is with snoring, There are different rhythms or snoring patterns and even the reasons for snoring vary. Snoring or that irritating sound which people make through their mouths and nose while asleep happens because of narrow airways failure of air to pass through the respiratory system easily. The air vibrates against the obstruction in airway causing the sound of snoring. The air is unable to escape normally through the airways and hence it causes that grating sound with each inhale and exhale. Yes that sound which makes you wish you could smother the fella with a pillow. We say fella because men are more prone to it than women. Snoring can happen due to various reasons: Habits: Those who smoke and drink regularly are likely to have a more relaxed set of jaw muscles causing them to snore readily and loudly. Weight: People with excess weight and poor muscle tone are likely to snore more. Age: The wide open mouthed gape kind of snoring usually happens in old people as the breathing muscles lose their tone somewhat. Posture: General posture and sleep posture in particular can affect snoring patterns. Especially, sleeping with the back flat against the bed constricts free exhalation. How to put a clamp on your snoring? If you have a snoring problem evaluate how serious it is and then take the necessary elimination strategies. Understand that your snoring can cause sleepless nights to your partners, family or whoever is within ear shot so instead of going in for fancy anti-snore devices which don't do a thing to help If this is a recent habit then consult your doctor and have him re-evaluate any medications that might be responsible. Try and establish a regular sleep time and ensure that you follow it to the T. Exercise to lose weight as losing flab around the throat can lead to better sleep. Ask a partner to awaken you if you snore too loudly as regular jabs in the gut can help train the mind to behave. Blow your nose out before bed time as clear air passages is what you need. Any nasal constriction or chest congestion is really what gets you started. Sleeping on your side is a better option than sleeping on your back. Before hitting the sack try and hum a few bars of the blues as singing can help tone the vocal cords and they are less likely to go into vibrate mode. According to help-guide.org there is a rather quaint method to cure snoring and that is to play on a certain musical instrument called the 'Didgeridoo' which is supposed to strengthen the soft palate and throat muscles. If you have no Australian connections then don't despair as rolling your tongue out from all sides before sleep can work just as effectively.
Sunshine for busy executivesMost people working in corporate offices, spend long hours within the confines of concrete buildings. Some business sectors like IT and manufacturing even have their employees working in night shifts. What we don't realize is that, in such a setup, our bodies do not get adequate dosage of sunlight. Lack of exposure to sunlight is responsible for a range of diseases and health conditions. The body requires sunlight just as much it requires food for its nourishment. Long hours of work in glazed business buildings under artificial lighting, deprive the body of this most basic need, thereby creating a deficiency of the vitamin D group. This deficiency then goes on to create several imbalances in the body, and contributes to diseases. Besides these, Vitamin D deficiency can also cause general muscle weakness, muscle and bone aches and pains and osteoporosis, due to the inability to utilize calcium. The best source of Vitamin D is natural sunshine, and that's why it is called the sunshine vitamin. Vitamin D can be had in the supplement form too, but it is still no match for natural sunlight. In a paper titled 'Vitamin D Deficiency' published in The New England Journal, M F Holick writes that, arms and legs should get exposure to sun for 10-15 minutes every day. "The amount of vitamin D produced depends on the intensity of the UVB in the sun and many other factors. Darker-skinned individuals may need 5-10 times more exposure than a fair-skinned person, in order to make the same amount of vitamin D." Tap that sunlight Early morning is the best time to get out in the sun. There's no better time to get that walk, than in the morning. Park your car a little away from the office building if possible, and walk to your office in the sun. When you take a tea break in the evening, head outside, instead of going to the in-house cafeteria.
Dilemma of a working woman - How to stay healthy!Women want to be healthy and beautiful. But most of us are not able to find the time to exercise or plan our meals. We pay more attention and money on therapies to look good externally. But good looks come from good health, and good health is an outcome of a healthy lifestyle. Healthy lifestyle helps in preventing illnesses and makes us more efficient. Improper and irregular diet, lack of physical activity, and stress are the chief causes of poor physical and mental health. Most working women today are occupied with their desk jobs, and as a result have a sedentary lifestyle. Eating junk food most of the times makes the matter worse. So if you want to stay healthy, here are some changes you can make. Add movement to life. Activities like walking, gardening, swimming or aerobics help build endurance and relieve stress. Choose something which you think you can consistently - Yoga, aerobics, cycling or even dancing. Balanced diet plays a pivotal role in fitness. Fruits, vegetables, and whole grains are a must in your diet. Antioxidants in fruits have an anti-ageing effect. Choose to eat in order to satisfy hunger and build healthy body, and not to feed your emotions. Avoid junk and processed food. They are empty calories. Drink water. Dehydration affects metabolism. Drink 8-10 glasses a day to flush out the toxins. Add liquids like milk, fruit juices to your diet. Positive thoughts help build a healthy mind and a healthy mind ensures healthy body. Do not smoke cigarettes or drink alcohol to deal with stress. Try yoga, meditation, listen to music, or take a nice shower to relax. Rest and relaxation helps to cope with daily stress. Making these lifestyle changes as a regimen will surely help working women to live a life of health, wellness and fitness.  
Tips and tricks to deal with my toddler's tantrumsWhen your child is having a tantrum, it may usually be for something that it wants and cannot have. Throwing a tantrum is a child's way of getting what it wants. Conversely, giving in to the child's demands may be the easy way out for the parents too. But always remember that giving in is not right. The child may get habituated to this and it may prove quite a nuisance to you too. Learn to say no, gently but firmly. Giving an acceptable reason for your 'no' and also an option at the same time works wonders. All said and done, children are not that easy to handle. If your child doesn't fall in line and is adamant, let it pass the phase. Screaming out the rage, throwing away things may help the child. When the anger subsides, looking at the destruction and the obvious uselessness of it may help the child realize his efforts were futile. But be careful that the child doesn't get physically hurt in this process. For some kids, a gentle hug helps soothe the anger pent up. Tantrums in public places can be extremely embarrassing. In such situations, do not argue or scold your child or order him to hush up. It will only end up making the child more adamant. Wait till the storm subsides. Take him out to a quieter place and talk gently but firmly. One thing to remember here is to never let the child know of your embarrassment and concern that you are in a public place. Children are very smart and may end up using this to work things in their favour. It is not easy being a toddler and it is definitely not easy being a toddler's parent either. By the time your toddler is old enough to go school he will have overcome this stage.  
How to remember everyone you meet?Now that would be quite a feat, would it not? To be able to recall the name and occupation of every person we ever encountered right down to the minutiae of how, where, and why we were introduced to them to begin with! Sometimes we raise the bar of forgetfulness to the extent of forgetting just who it was who introduced us to "Mr. what's-his-face!" If only there were ways to remember the modest and average people who leave virtually no impression on us, wouldn't that save us great embarrassment? Plus it will help us do away with those sheepish looks when it dawns upon the other person that you haven't the foggiest of notions as to who he is. Stranger: Hi! You remember me? How are you doing, Frankie? Frank: Umm! I am well (this guy's face looks mighty familiar, but for the life of me, I cannot recall ever having cast my eyes on him). Stranger: So, how was your annual bridge completion? Manage to beat the Swiss pairs this time? Frank: Atta boy! Got it! This guy happened to be kibitzing at the weekend bridge club at Aldermere. Whew! Stranger: You gave me quite a start there. You looked right through me and I was quite not pleased at the fact that just last week I happened to congratulate you. Frank: Well Martin, be tough to not remember you, of course I do! Just didn't think of bumping into you here. Martin: Well, I am Walther and I can now see that you don't remember me at all! How many times has the above scenario happened to us? While it is well-nigh impossible to remember every name or face that we come across, it would be  a good habit to at least attempt our 'mental name book' to avoid an occasion for future embarrassment! Now, how in the world does one do that? Simplest way would be to carry a small notebook with a pen to make note of someone that you have just been introduced to, at a meeting or a social do. Our friends often introduce us to people and chances are that if there is no occasion to remember that person, then the brain fades it out of its memory list, as it will only use up space on the brain's 'hard disk.' Human memory might be jogged to remember trivia from 25 years ago in great detail, but ask a simple question - remember what you had for lunch last Tuesday?  - and that would be very difficult to answer, especially if last Tuesday was just an ordinary day with no special reference points around lunchtime to help you remember. Maybe if something momentous had occurred on Tuesday last, like pretty Meg from next door, sharing lunch with you rather unexpectedly, then you can bet your bottom dollar you will remember what you had on the day in question. So create reference points! When you are introduced to someone, first and foremost, reference it with who introduced you and then try and make a reference of at least one unique distinguishing feature in that person. Now you don't really require the eye of a physiognomist, and it would be mighty impolite to stare hard for the "distinguishing feature" coin to drop. So a quick look and you got 'long nose Mary Gomez' all referenced and ready for recall at the next chance meeting. Make the reference phrases funny so that you won't have any problem whatsoever in recalling the name behind the funny phrase when you most require it. Alternatively, try associating a picture with the name if you aren't very good with phrase reminders. These techniques are called mnemonics, which is pronounced ni-mon-nics, and funnily enough the very curious spelling - Mnemonics makes you want to have a picture card memory association for the right pronunciation. A mnemonic for this could be 'knee-moan- knicks". Easy enough, i.e., if you remember the sequence right. You could also try memory exercises with names picked off from the telephone directory at random. Pick an A-lister say - 'Anderson' and then flick through to D and pick 'Dougherty' and so on until you have picked at least 10 names of a different alphabet. Now, try and write down the numbers that you must have undoubtedly memorized until now. You can consider yourself blessed even if you are able to memorize the number of the third person by the time you reach person number 10. This will give you a memory for names and numbers at least. Or, go through any university web sites and look at the photo galleries of past alumni. Give yourself 1 minute to quickly glance at all the names on the page. Then try and recall the name by applying the memory picture association or develop your own technique. With regular practice, you could well be in the employ of the local police to help identify criminals off a line up. If that's too dangerous for you, then at least that will  keep your brain alert and active with this brain gym and help avoid any boo-boos in the future.
Dealing with obsessive thinking and worriesAn old adage goes - 'Worry is like a rocking chair. It gives you something to do but it doesn't get you anywhere'. This is absolutely true for many of us who have developed the habit of worrying unnecessarily over outcomes and circumstances. Thinking about things and over our course of action is a good thing because you should always think twice before acting. What about obsessive thinking? Is it good for you? Anything in extremity is a bad thing, whether it is your favorite food or your thoughts. Worrying incessantly is a part of obsessive thinking where you cannot let go of negative thoughts and they circulate in your mind continuously. Obsessive thinking is a negative infinite loop, a broken record that is stuck without having anyone to click the stop button. So how should you deal with this obsessive thinking that is sure to spell your doom in the long run? Though psychologists have devised various scientific methods of overcoming obsessive thoughts and worries, here we have listed down some easy to follow rituals that will help you deal with such worries and thoughts. Meditation - Yoga swears by the art of meditation as it is thought to release all negative energy from the mind and soul. Concentrating on your breathing and also absorbing a positive source of energy is the essence of meditation. So whenever you are obsessed about something, sit down, calm your nerves and meditate. Physical activity - Exercising always helps. Engage in physical activity which increases the body's metabolism and requires effort. Indulge in those dance lessons or swimming or maybe cycling and you will divert your mind from those negative thoughts. Indulge in your hobbies - So you thought you don't have time for your hobbies, but your hobbies relax your mind and body. Moreover, a hobby also takes out the creative side in you. So, whether you like to collect coins or stamps, or lean towards arts and crafts, a hobby is sure to occupy your mind and take you away from worries. Socialize - Friends and relatives are your lifeline as they help you in those tough situations. Even if you are mentally not at peace, making social calls on your friends and relatives will take the edge off.  Try to meet people who can empathize with you and help you move out of it. Socializing will give you that much needed break from the vicious cycle of your thoughts. Though a short-term relief, going out for movies or taking a weekend getaway with your near and dear ones or even indulging your wife in shopping, can be helpful. Confide - Talking to someone close who understands you helps you in expressing your troubles. Thinking obsessively, you usually tend to ignore your feelings and emotions. Your mind remains trapped in the net of those obsessive thoughts and your emotional well-being takes a backseat. When you talk to another person, he or she will hear you out and help you relieve the stress that is on your mind. They would understand your state of well-being and support you emotionally. Be mindful - You may find it easy to go back into the same negative thought process. Don't let your mind chatter. Stop your mind by standing up for yourself. Stand in front of the mirror and say, "I am not a victim. I have the power and strength to move ahead" Do this whenever you become aware that you are going back into the same thought process.  This will give you the mental strength needed to come out of it.  Be mindful and aware but don't be too harsh on yourself. Be responsible -Your mind can make you or break you. If you understand this truth you will find it easier to manage your thoughts. Take responsibility of your thoughts good or bad.  The mind can create thoughts to project blame or judgments about others.  When you own your thoughts, you will find it easier to shape them the way you want. Create a higher vision of your life - When you keep a higher vision in your life, you can move ahead easily.  By developing a higher vision, you are asking yourself, who am I?and finally working towards it. You take positive actions and thus there would be more gratitude for what you have and less resentment for things that do not work.   This stops your mind from working unnecessarily. Obsessive worrying is a psychological disorder which in extreme cases has to be dealt with pathologically. Do not let your condition to reach the extreme end of the spectrum. Follow the above mentioned suggestions and try to deal with those thoughts yourself. It may take some time but rest assure, it will be effective in the long run.
High fiber foods and their benefitsFiber has many health benefits and that is why it is important to include fiber in your diet. However, if you are not used to fiber in your diet then introduce it slowly or it could cause indigestion and gas. Fibers are good for overall health and help to boost the immune system and help prevent a number of diseases. The digestive health benefits of fiber : If bowel movements are regular, then fibers will prevent both constipation and diarrhea. Regular movements flush out excessive cholesterol as well as harmful toxins from the intestines which could also be carcinogenic. Fiber helps to reduce inflammation of the intestines, could bring relief from irritable bowel syndrome and prevent piles, ulcers, and acidity. The benefits to the heart Soluble fiber is good for the heart. Fiber reduces the bad cholesterol levels (LDL). It helps to lower blood pressure, improves the levels of good cholesterol (HDL). Fibers reduce the risk of stroke also. These factors are good for heart heath. Weight Loss Fiber can help you to lose weight as it makes you feel fuller for longer which means you will eat less. High-fiber fruits and vegetables have lower calories, so by adding these to your diet cuts calories which could aid in weight loss. Eat 21 to 38 grams of fiber per day depending on your age and gender. Diabetes If you already suffer from type II diabetes then you should have soluble fiber as it slows down the absorption of sugar and can help to maintain blood sugar levels. Regulating blood sugar can also reduce the risk of kidney and gallbladder stones. Cancer prevention Though research is still ongoing, but the general conclusion is that eating fiber foods keeps the colon in a better condition and this could prevent colon cancer. However, it does prevent digestive tract cancer. The more fiber you eat the more fluids you should drink as that helps to absorb fiber better. Good for the skin Eating fiber is good for the skin as they help to flush out toxins from your body which otherwise cause acne. Besides eating a lot of fruits and vegetables produce antioxidants that are good for your skin. Some tips Start your day with fiber as it keeps you full and sugar levels just right to keep you energetic. Try to replace white rice, bread, and pasta with brown rice and whole grain products. Eat seeds, nuts, and flaxseeds either whole or ground and sprinkle some on fruit, yoghurt, or cereal. Add beans and legumes to your diet as often as possible. Eat whole fruits instead of juice. Insoluble fiber can be found in foods like whole grains, wheat, cereals, and vegetables such as carrots, celery, and tomatoes. Whereas soluble fibers are found in barley, oatmeal, beans, nuts, and fruits such as apples, berries, citrus fruits, and pears. Foods like meat, dairy, and sugar have no fiber and some foods like white rice, white bread, and pastries have no fiber either because it has got removed because of refining.
Benefits of meditation: How daily meditation helps you lead a wholesome life Sharper memory: One of the most important cognitive capacities we use daily is our memory. With higher amount of stress on your brain and body due to demands at workplace and home, there is high probability of negative effect on your memory. This can be countered by mindfulness meditation where the focus of attention is a particular physical sensation. This lets you quiet your mind and learn to be attentive solely to the matter at hand, thus allowing your brain to be able to remember more sharply and quickly. Dealing with stress: Stress is the buzzword for anyone who is leading their life in busy cities. Starting from the hurried walk into the office to the pressure of meeting deadlines and reaching home exhausted only to find oneself engrossed in another set of tedious jobs is the condition of daily life for most people. Meditation will allow you to cope with stress in a stronger way by bringing the energies of your body under your control, thus giving you the power to channelize them effectively. Giving up painkillers: Recent medical studies, especially ones conducted in Montreal in 2010, showed how the practice of Zen meditation structures the brain in such a manner that its capacity to sense and deal with pain increases. Primarily practiced by Buddhist monks, Zen is the form of meditation where you focus on your breathing and posture while watching and letting your mind gradually turn quiet. In this way, you can put those pain killers away and increase your innate capacity to deal with pain. Happiness quotient: Prefrontal cortex is the part of brain concerned with positive emotions and feelings. Those who meditate have been seen to have greater activity in this area. Major journals and research institutions focusing on depression and role of meditation in reducing it have found that meditation helps the person to feel in control of their life by subtly changing the working of their brains and thus, resulting in greater capacity to cope with depression and negative feelings. Good for your heart: Two kinds of meditation which are greatly beneficial for smooth working of your heart are Zen and Transcendental meditation. Transcendental meditation, taking after its name, helps you to transcend your worries through attention on chanting. It has been found that meditating daily helps to reduce the chances of stroke and heart attacks by over 40%.
An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure!Small mistakes that we keep committing become, over a period of time, serious health problems that are potentially life threatening. Given here is a list of the 10 most common mistakes that we make when it comes to heart health. Ignoring the health check-up: Your last reports said you were fit as a fiddle. So you haven't gone for a check-up since then? Our health becomes the first thing we sideline in today's fast-paced lives. Most of the heart diseases do not show any signs and symptoms in the early stages and when the signs and symptoms come up, too much of damage has already been done. So it becomes very essential to go for regular health check ups. If you are in your twenties it would be advised to get your cholesterol checked every 5 years, blood glucose every 2 years. Beyond 45 years though the frequency of health, check-ups should increase. Body Mass Index is something that you should get checked every time you visit your doctor. Skipping breakfast: Breakfast is the most important part of what you eat the whole day. Most of us tend to skip breakfast due to lack of time, fear of weight gain. But starting your day without breakfast is like driving on reserve fuel. You will start fine, but end up feeling dull and sluggish towards the end of the day. Skipping breakfast has been associated with development of diabetes mellitus and obesity. These two have a strong co-morbidity with cardiovascular diseases. No wonder then it is said, breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince and dinner like a pauper. Too much of sun-blocking: We are people obsessed with fairness and it is understandable that one wouldn't want to get tanned by going out in the sun. Some amount of sunlight exposure is very vital for health. Vitamin D is synthesized by the body from cholesterol with the help of sun rays. Recent studies reveal that people with little or no exposure to sunlight tend to develop arterial plaques that end up in heart attacks, high blood pressure or strokes! Going for the fizz : Aerated drinks are loaded with triglycerides that are a part of the bad cholesterol. They thicken the blood and it becomes difficult for it to flow through the arteries. This leads to several complications. Not watching what you eat: Often we are so caught up in our work that we just grab a quick bite to eat without paying heed to what actually we are eating. Fast foods are extremely unhealthy and wreck havoc onour systems. Missing fruits and fibres: Fibrous food are extremely heart friendly. The fibres help in pushing out the cholesterol out of the body. Beans, oats and barley are all extremely fibre-rich. Fruits are a rich source of vitamins and minerals. They contain potassium that is extremely essential to neutralize the effects of sodium. By doing this they help in regulating the blood pressure. Citrus fruits too have a high amount of potassium in them. Avoiding walking: Walking is the simplest form of exercise the body can get. 10 minutes of brisk walking is extremely helpful for the heart to keep functioning efficiently. Not sleeping well: The body needs 6 to 8 hours of undisturbed sleep for it to reboot and get back its full functioning capacity.  A sound sleep at night reduces the blood pressure and regularizes the heart beats. People compromising on sleep are the ones most prone to suffer from heart attacks and high blood pressure. Not flossing your teeth: Gingivitis is the inflammation of gums. This inflammation hosts large number of germs that leak into the bloodstream and reach the heart causing a number of heart problems. People who floss daily not only have good oral hygiene, they also have a healthy heart. Forgetting the Family: Many heart diseases tend to run in the family. It is very important to know the medical history of your parents and grandparents. The risks of you developing heart diseases are high if someone in your family already has them.
Dos and don s during heat crampsHeat cramps can affect people who exercise or work in the heat. It could be due to dehydration, so if you are going to be active in the heat then you need to drink a lot of water even if you are not thirsty. Before going out, find out what the temperature is and do not exercise outdoors in the heat. Heat cramps may not be as serious as heat exhaustion or heat stroke, but the condition needs to be treated with the same urgency. People who are on low-sodium diets may be affected more than others. Heat cramps may seem mild, but they can be the first sign of heat exhaustion, so pay attention and stop all activity, and rest. Here is what you can do and what you should avoid if you suffer from heat cramps: Dos : If you have muscle spasms and the muscles are unable to function properly, then immediately stop all activity. Get inside a room or go into the shade and take some rest. Raise the feet to 12 inches above the body. Gently massage and stretch the muscles. Wet a paper towel or handkerchief and drape it around your face, at the back of your neck and underarms. Drink a clear natural juice or a sports drink to get the electrolyte balance back. Do not go out in the sun again even if the spasms have subsided. If the cramps last more than an hour then go to a doctor. If you are on a low-sodium diet then tell the doctor about it. Don s : Don take any painkillers or fever tablets as they could cause harm. Avoid caffeine, alcohol, and sugary soda drinks. Don rub alcohol on the muscles. Don drink ice cold drinks as they can cause stomach cramping. Don take salt tablets unless the doctor has prescribed them. Don do your full quota of exercises if the heat is getting on to you. Don stop drinking water even if you do not feel thirsty. Don resume any strenuous activity for several hours after a heat cramp. Prevention:Prevention is always better, so it’s a good idea to reduce exercise in the summer, especially when it is extremely hot. If people are working outside, like construction workers, then they must take more breaks, keep their heads covered and sip on water after every 10 minutes to prevent heat cramps. Always plan ahead and get acclimatized if you know you have to do a physical activity in the heat that could cause sweating. If you are an athlete, then do take a mix of sports drink, water, and juices to maintain the electrolyte balance. Always carry water with you if you are playing any sport in the heat. All events must be planned at a time when the heat is bearable and not when it is too hot. Keep a close watch on the person if there are signs of vomiting and nausea along with flushed skin. Rush them to the hospital.
Penis healthHere's a quick one on how to go about doing the good work The function of penis is primarily passing urine and intercourse. So from the hygiene point of view it becomes imperative that the penis, testicles and scrotum should be washed regularly with mild soap and toweled dry to keep out any odor causing bacteria. The foreskin should pull back to expose the glans or it can cause bleeding while having sexual intercourse. The foreskin is that protective sheath around the glans. It appears a simple task to pull the foreskin back about a quarter of an inch. But it is difficult. So for those men whose foreskin isn't exactly the 'spirit of co-operation'. Soap and lubrication can ease the way down. Try it slowly and gently over a few days and then ease down with practice. It is important to slide the foreskin back while bathing to wash off the 'smegma', sticky substance that tends to accumulate there. Don't wear underwear which is too tight or it may restrict the blood flow to the penis. Besides that is not very good from the point of view of the quality of sperm generated by the testicles. 'It's really surprising how many men don't clean underneath their foreskin', says Patrick French, sexual health expert. A penis, for once, isn't a muscle and you could do some serious damage in trying to bend it. Secondly, it is meant to have erections so there is nothing abnormal about that. The penis has no bones in them but don't ever try to apply strength and/or fold your penis away. It is like a tube with blood vessels which fill up and give an erection. If you were to rough handle the penis by twisting it violently it can actually cause the vessels to rupture and cause a swelling which can be painful. Do not ignore any swellings, lacerations or spots on the penis as they could be symptoms of sexual disease or infection. Even circumcised men should wash under the glans regularly.
Is sex linked to self esteem?Man is a curious creature, full of quirks and contradictions. Sexual intercourse, something that most people consider an intimate and private experience, is spoken about in hushed tones and often, with some discomfort. We don't reveal or talk about our sexual desires, as readily we discuss our salary packages or food habits. This is quite ironic seeing how sex is an important gauge for a person's self esteem and also an indicator of his/her social desirability. The very thing that we do under covers, we somehow choose to "keep under cover". The Link between Sex and Self Esteem: Self esteem is an important factor that determines the mental & physical well-being of an individual. All of us have a craving to be understood, liked and appreciated; and these form the equivalent of our basic needs on the inverted pyramid- Food, clothing and shelter. For a human being to flourish and prosper, consumable food, without the mental food of appreciation, is not enough; and sexual intercourse or an intimacy with the opposite sex, is one way of validating that need. Sex therefore, ceases to be just a physical need instilled by nature for the perpetuation of the species, but goes into the larger emotional cum psychological dimension of self actualization and realization. Though some of us might be embarrassed to broach the topic of 'whether or not we are getting enough', the truth is that every human seeks to achieve his sexual potential, even while he or she might, not be aware of it. Most of us have the ability to get the foods matching our taste preferences onto our plates, but with sex, this could be a little difficult, since sex, is a complex subject with a lot of social, moral and religious links. The truth is evident in the number of marriages (the very cornerstones of civil society) that fail on the basis of sexual compatibility, either by setting unrealistic sexual expectations or by not owning up to, or even identifying, one's sexual needs. This has repercussions on the psyche and self-esteem of a person, and this is especially true in the case of men in particular, as they may feel completely inferior for not being able to attract a sexual partner matching his desires. In some people, this also leads to a case of self-loathing, for having sexual needs which a partner doesn't understand, or much worse, needs which are considered taboo and sinful (Homosexuality, Anal Sex, Group Sex, Fetishes, etc.) These complex emotions can wreak  havoc on a person's self-esteem, by creating severe internal conflicts and serious self-doubts. Now socially, sex can either liberate a person, or hold him prisoner. At times, the unfulfilled needs may get repressed and banished to the shadows, only to be played out later, in the form of sexual adventurism and crime. Just one look at the sexual crimes in our society today, and we can clearly understand just how healthy our collective self esteem is! The very society that frowns upon prostitution, is actually responsible for creating it, though everybody would like to pretend otherwise. The crux of the matter is that "sex" and "self esteem" are closely related; and one should not shy away from addressing any issues one might face regarding one's sexuality. Physical love is necessary for the survival of a relationship and one needs to make time and efforts to successfully create one's own sexual space. The positive effects of a good sex life can be seen in an increased work productivity, fewer illnesses and an increase in one's overall efficiency. Some people are haunted by sexual guilt and confusion and when they keep it all locked up, they suffer from unexplained physical pains and feel 'down in the dumps' mentally. Another problem with appreciation from the opposite sex, is the addiction to  external validation. Some people feel utterly worthless until they receive positive feedback about their looks or abilities on a regular basis. This can be downright devastating, as in these cases, there is a great dependence on external factors for one to feel good. While no one denies the "feel good factor" of sexual appreciation, it is up to each one of us, to decide just how much of control one must be giving to external factors, to determine our personal self-esteem. The appreciation may be theirs, but the esteem is entirely of the self and only the self can decide how much of appreciation and sex is enough.
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