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Ways to look handsome!One disclaimer before reading "Looking good is not age/weight/family specific." Now we can start off with understanding what does handsome means. Does it mean wearing good clothes? Or having a good face? Or having a good body? What is it actually? Well, a simple definition could be "being handsome means being confident and having loads of style and poise." It's not dependent on somebody's face or body specifically. So what makes a person handsome? Will his attitude count? Do we need a lot of money to get that look? Let's answer all such questions in the article. Personal care: The first and the foremost cornerstone for getting a perfect look is to look after yourself well. This includes- Hygiene - Personal hygiene is most important. Dental hygiene, managing body odor, cutting your nails on time, removing hair in the underarms, nose, and taking care of overall body hygiene is of utmost importance.Skin care - Taking care of one's skin is no more a girly thing now; men need to do the same as well. Applying moisturizers, lotions that are readily available, tailor-made for men.Hair care - Men do not need to spend a lot of time managing their hair as women do, but that doesn't mean they can get all complacent about them. Try and wash and shampoo your hair at least twice in a week. You could use natural or artificial conditioners in the hair to make it soft. Get a trim every month or else they can become too long to manage. The suave and debonair look, along with the above indicated personal care methods; one important pointer is to take care of one's facial hair. Agreed that the rough and rugged look is good with some clothes and skin colors, but try and avoid it as 'a regular' and get a good shave. You can either keep a clean shaven look or keep a beard which is well trimmed. This will give you an urbane and classy look. Clothes cabana - An important factor for your looks is your clothes as well. One needs to understand that there are particular kinds of clothes which shall look good on them and there is a section which they should never try. Once you understand this thin line, you can do wonders with your clothes. Try to understand which shades look good on you. The bright colors or pastel shades. After this, you need to choose your formal and casual wears as well. Try and understand what kind of clothes make you look good and what are the options you can always try. The must have checklist is given below - A pair of good dark blue jeans. A white shirt. A colored T-shirt. Jacket and waist coat. Dinner jacket or tuxedo (whichever suits you). Pair of black trousers. Sweatshirts. A full pastel shade sweater. Accessorize your look - Along with good clothes you need a few more embellishments:Shoes - Get two different pairs - one leather and the other sports for formal and informal occasions. The shoes should be buffed with shoe wax regularly and you can wash off the dirt on your sports shoes once every couple of weeks.Belts and Tie - A good and well-fitting tie and a sober choice in belts always adds to the look of the "complete man."Watches - A good analog watch is a "must have" on every guy's wrist for that added attraction. Work out regimens - Now workout does not only mean joining a gym or keeping a personal trainer. You need to just keep your body fit, which can be done by jogging, yoga, or even a morning and evening walk. Try to be active, which in turn will help you stay in shape. You can even pick up a sport for that matter. When your body is fit, you will have a relaxed mind and soul too. Eat healthy - Having a hamburger everyday will make you only lethargic and fat and certainly far from handsome. Try to follow a diet regimen which nowhere means you need to have nightmarish boiled vegetables only. You just need to avoid eating outside which means no junk or oily food. This shall not only help you look good, but will let you be young and fit. Try to have more leafy vegetables and fish in your daily diet rather than red meat and spices. Once in a week you can dig into your favorite foods and pig out. Say no to cigarettes and alcohol - Working out or eating healthy and getting the best clothes and accessories will never help you get in good shape until you say no to all the habits which shall prove deadly for you in the future. Try and quit smoking and drinking as they affect your health and stamina in the most adverse ways possible. Along with that they also have a very bad effect on your mental health as they become an addiction and hamper your concentration and thinking abilities as well. Million dollar smile - Wearing good clothes do not have a prerequisite of behaving like a supermodel anywhere. Try to wear a good and sweet smile which shall give you a nice and attractive look at the same time. A straight face might end up making you look unapproachable and arrogant, so remember smiling always to complete your attire and style. Good stance - Wearing all the best outfits and looking a million bucks might go all in vain if you have a bad body posture. Try and walk and sit straight. Having an erect stance always makes you look more confident, attractive, and masculine, so always have that poise in your posture which shall make you look awesome. Wear your confidence and attitude - Last but not the least is this most important pointer and that is - be comfortable and confident with whatever you wear and however you look. Being confident makes you win half your battle, always. So, have that debonair attitude and head to the floor, you will always be the head turner of the show. So what are you waiting for? Start your preparations, as being handsome does not require any occasion!        
Leg toning exercises for womenFor those women who will leave 'no stone unturned', here are a few great exercises which work superbly on the legs and whole body. For those who have always wanted a great pair of legs, don't change your jeans brand. Just change your brand of exercise. Here are great leg toning exercises that can make your legs attention grabbers. Well-shaped legs are what every woman desires especially as it signifies 'movement', 'mobility' and 'strength'. When we say legs we mainly mean the thighs, the calves and the feet. To get more precise the quadriceps of the thighs the hamstrings and the hip adductors are the prime targets of most exercises. A complete leg work out would also include the 'Tibialis Anteriors' or the shin muscles. Exercising the legs can be quite a frustrating thing especially if the leg muscles don't show any cosmetic improvement. Here is an exercise regimen which will ensure that you will get those attention-grabbing legs along with the strength, flexibility and tone which you have always desired. The stand This is probably the most undermined exercise of them all since it doesn't involve lugging heavy weights around or running for miles or squatting! It is a foundation exercise for the legs.  Choose your favorite spot on the floor and just stand erect with both feet together and toes pointing forward. Hold the hands straight at the elbows and keep the shoulders square. Tuck the chin in and do not bend your knees. Feel the ground under the feet. Now flex your thigh muscles and keep your feet firmly on the ground. Direct your attention towards the back of your thighs and keep your knees taut. Stand firm for about 3-5 minutes initially and gradually extend to five minutes or more. This exercise is simpler than it actually is as it keeps the thighs taut and firm. The entire leg gets a marvelous stretch and any faulty standing or postural habits create unnecessary tension and uneven hip alignment. The standing pose will be your first step towards trim and well-sculpted legs. The One Leg Extension After you perfect the stand, here is another great leg exerciser - The one leg extension Perform a stand as in the previous exercise for about 30 seconds. Once you get your grounding and feel your foundations beneath the feet, take a deep breath. Now flex your thigh muscles and keep the kneecaps taut without feeling any strain. Bend the left leg at the knee and raise it without bending at the right leg. Now catch hold of the big toe with the left hand and hold the pose for a few breaths. You will initially struggle for balance as you have to keep the other leg straight. Now that you have caught the big toe of the flexed leg gradually straighten the leg out without letting go of your grip. This is a challenging pose especially for the hamstrings, the hip flexors and the calves since the leg muscles are going to be a little tight especially around the hips and the hamstrings. With regular practice, the pain will ease and then you can even try and take the toe towards as high as you can with the aid of your left hand. Repeat with other leg following the same sequence. One Legged Squat The one legged squat is a superior exercise to the two legged variety is that it doesn't require many repetitions as it is quite a strenuous exercise even for advanced exercisers. Stand with the back of a chair within easy reach initially. Extend the right leg out first and squat down to your heel with your left. Once you have reached the end of the squat try not to touch extended leg as there comes the difficult part - getting up to standing position without touching the floor with your hands for support. Raise yourself to standing position and repeat with other leg. You can do about 3-4 sets with the same leg or alternate legs using the back of a chair for hand support as you squat deeply. The single legged squat exercises the gluteus, the knees and the entire hip joint and also gives lower back strength. Initially your knees might hurt so don't try this without support of a chair or a partner. Stop in case of intense pain. Step Training If plain jogging doesn't do the trick for shapely legs for you, try using stadium stairs or any gradient which is at 30 degrees and comprises even steps. Your regular apartment stairwell or even a pedestrian over bridge can do the trick. First set only walk up one step at a time. Second set do alternate stairs. For the third set you can sprint up as fast as you can the entire flight of stairs or halt for exactly ten seconds when tired and start again. You have the option of stopping as many times you wish as long as you start again after ten seconds. This can work up quite a sweat and regular step training works out and touches muscle groups that even normal running or squats cannot reach.
Yoga to strengthen women's lifeEveryone expects from a women for all their necessities. The husband needs to go to office and she has to prepare for this, the son or daughter needs to go to school, tiffin needs to be packed, and the in-laws need her attention for the morning tea and breakfast. Along with this she has to rush to office on time. Then while returning, she has buy vegetables and other things for household, then go home and cook, and sleep late after all the chores are done. For such a multi-tasking working-women, the time available is very less to replenish the energy she uses to do such work. Multitasking leads to stress and tension and causes headaches, stiff neck, tight shoulders, poor posture, shortness of breath, clenched teeth and fatigue. What is the solution for this? The only solution is YOGA.  We all know that yoga has many positive effects on ones well-being; it brings about both physiological and psychological benefits. It is beneficial for body, mind, and spirit. It needs only 10 minutes. Yoga helps to relieve your stress and tension. Yoga in Sanskrit means 'YOG' that is to join or unite. It is the union of mind, body, spirit, and breath with our surroundings and our universe. One should start yoga gradually with a comfortable speed and limits. Breathing exercises are excellent way to reduce stress and tension. It can be done along with asanas. For this you have to sit comfortably with relaxed shoulders and with your chin level at the floor. Inhale through the nose expanding your abdomen, rib cage, then expand your chest, then begin to exhale by contracting your abdomen, ribs and then lastly relax your chest. Now continue to breath in this fashion, this improves the quality and quantity of oxygen that enters our body and helps to relieve the shortness of breath and relieves the tension. The yoga mudra is helpful to relieve the stress, for this sit down crossed legged on the mat and keep the back straight, then take the arms behind your back and hold the left wrist with the right hand. Then by exhaling, bend forward to touch your left knee, while doing this focus on the feeling of surrendering to God, which protects you all the time, then while inhaling come back to the normal position and repeat this on the right side. Then finally, complete this pose by touching the forehead to the ground in front in the centre, while doing this exhale, then when you feel like inhaling come back to the normal position. This posture increases the energy and stimulates your respiration, improves your digestion calms your nerves. But this should be avoided by pregnant women, hernia patients, and patients with retinal disorder. The shavasana also helps you to relax your body before you get to work. In this you have to lie down on your back on the mat. Keep your arms a foot away from your body and your feet separated two feet apart.  Then close your eyes and focus on your breathing and feel free of thoughts and tension. Breathe normally and focus on your body parts, toes, legs, abdomen, head and finally the scalp and try to relax each muscle group. It improves your breathing, concentration, gives inner peace. You should avoid this if you are suffering from low blood pressure.  
Are you there for your teenage children?You must be there for your adolescent children so that they know who to turn to when they are confused. Being there does not necessarily mean your physical presence, but even the rules, boundaries, and standards of behavior you might have set should be able to guide them. When the teenager comes under peer pressure, then these rules may help them make the right choices. Teenagers live in fear They are frightened of their teachers, their friends; they are frightened of being mocked at or not being able to cope. They are dealing with a lot of issues, so when they come home, show them you care. They don't need parents screaming and shouting at them about their conduct or studies. The moment they come in, you should greet them with a smile, no matter what your feelings are otherwise. Don't expect your teenage children to be adults because they are still growing. Family is always important Most people think that teenagers no longer need the love, warmth, and support of the family. Your child might be a teenager,not a child to hold hands and show them the way, but they do need your support. A family works like an anchor that can pull back a teenager from being drifted away. Engage them.Speak to them regarding their likes and dislikes, the pressures they feel at studies, among other things. This could help them from the intense emotional turmoil they may be going through. Equation changes As a child you could cuddle your children, scold them, nurture and guide them, but as teenagers the equation might change. You may not cuddle your teenage child, but a warm hug now and then or a pat on the shoulder is enough to let them know that you love them just the same. Listen to them when they share an opinion. They want to prove themselves so follow their advice if it's reasonable so they feel they are an important part of the family and their opinions do matter. Don't treat your teenage children with suspicion.It will drive them away!! Moody If your teenage child is moody and uncommunicative, it does not mean that they don't need their family. It's just that friends might have taken precedence in their lives. Just the feeling that they have your support may encourage them to take their independent decisions. Information It is important to inform your teenage child regarding alcohol, drugs, and sex. However, you must also know they could experiment. So tell them about the dangers, and if they still make a mistake, then be there and do not abandon them. Help them get through the crisis. Teenage behavior Sometimes teenagers can behave erratically. It could be difficult to know if this is teenage moodiness or something more serious. As a parent you need to watch out for this and find out indirectly about what is troubling them. They might not open up immediately, but if you are around when they feel like chatting, they could let you know what is troubling them.
Building self confidence by improving body languageSo what have they told you? That only physically attractive people have the right to self-confidence? That you either have it in you or you don't? Let's face it, confidence is the key to anything and everything. Right from driving a car to handling work to dating, confidence is what separates the proverbial wheat from the chaff. What you need to remember is that the mind speaks the body language. Conversely if you change your body language, then it has an impact on the mind as well. Mr.Hunched Over This guy is the classic example of a person who just doesn't like himself. The world is a mighty dangerous place for him. Just look at the way he walks. Shoulders all hunched over, head down as he shuffles rather than walk. Mr. Hunched Over generally finds it difficult to look people in the eye as he speaks and he last is handshake is as limp as his mind. He crosses his arms tightly, touches his nose all the time to see if it has grown since he lied through it. Mr. Walk the Walk and Talk the Talk This chap is diametrically the opposite of the first kind. He exudes an air of confidence in his walk, manner and speech. He has a confident stride which is helped by the fact that he stands to his height with his head held high, chin tucked in and shoulders squared back. This is what gives him the confidence as this posture is designed for efficiency. Mind you, he isn't ram rod straight, just straight enough so that his ears are in line with his shoulders and hips. The chest is also out since the shoulders are drawn back towards the hip. This facilitates deep, even and diaphragmatic breathing which prevents anxiety. His hand shake is firm. As he offers his hand, he exerts just the right pressure on the other person's hand to indicate a strong grip. This is no wrestling bout, so the confident man always exerts just the right kind of pressure in a hand shake.  He maintains eye contact with the person he is talking to; not a staring about, but normal eye contact, one which won't make the other person conscious of being stared at. He looks away from time to time to give his eyeballs a rest. This is why he comes across as genuine and not shift eyed and restless. To be Mr.-Or- Ms. Walk the Walk Always square your shoulders and keep your head held high when you walk. You might seem imperious or high handed at first, but then it will work wonders on your self-esteem and you will begin to feel differently about yourself. You needn't even be a tall person to come across as cool and confident-just stand up to your own height and see the miracle. Breathe slowly steadily and deeply. Use your abdominal muscles to draw in your breath rather than engaging your neck muscles which end up making you a shallow breather and plus you also tend to hunch easily if you don't feel your rib cage and stomach expand as you breathe in. Practice standing and speaking in front of the mirror. It will show you exactly how you appear to others. Practice your walk in front of a video camera and keep a record of your metamorphosis.
Expression forbidden! - Human emotionsSome people have a perpetual 'bee in their bonnets'! They maintain a demeanor and a mask which is virtually impenetrable. They are generally highly competent and efficient and occupy high positions of authority. They believe in living life set to a routine, and the worst part is that they expect others to adhere to it as well! God help those who have a boss like that, as their immediate liberty is at stake, and unless they are honing to be perfectionists, life is going to be a series of disasters with Captain Ice around! Nothing wrong with perfectionism per se, but when someone is a hard task master then he could well earn himself the epithet of being "a crashing bore," especially if he doesn't allow others to express themselves properly. Take a more intimate scenario - Mr. Bright Harry meets tepid Sally. The sparks fly only on Harry's side with Sally stonewalling his every effort to get to know her mind, body, and soul. A tough ask for poor Harry, as he is yet to touch first base with Sally. Know what? They have been married 5 years and she seems to be fond of him, yet has never as much admitted it to him. Quite frankly, the two could pass off for siblings rather than 'man and wife.' Why are some people such rotten spoilsports, especially where emotions are concerned?  It may well be a natural mindset for some to have an emotional guard up and emote, or have an emotional connect only with certain types of people. Fair enough and good show, we say! After all one can't be wearing one's emotions on a sleeve or you end up been taken advantage of. That's a mask that most 'tough guys with soft centre' wear anyway. Nowadays with the rules being somewhat relaxed with men been given liberty and allowances to display their gentler feminine emotional side, we find men going over the top with the sheer display of emotional expression. One is at sea wondering which one was worse off-the tough, cynical cop look or the "let me weep my heart out for you" kind of contrived emotion. That apart, it is bad enough for us having to contend with a person who has difficulty with expressing himself properly. We don't mean articulation or even well-developed linguistic ability - we mean being able to be spontaneous and congenial and a little forthcoming and nice to be with sort of an emotional person. So, unless someone has a romantic angle towards this guy (there are weirdoes all over the world, who go asking for it!) or girl, he is going to be feared, hated, despised, unloved, and uninvited by everybody. So why do people behave like they are going to be flogged for even attempting a ghost of a smile or a cheerful greeting to a fellow co-worker? Why do some people find it difficult even to open up on a psychiatrist's couch? The Mask The most common reason for Mr. or Ms. Grumpy is that they have probably been emotionally brutalized in their formative years by an authoritative parent and this has caused them to lock themselves up double quick in a shell and throw away the key. Now, that can be tough and extremely painful. It is a prison of their own making through which nobody can see that once bright-n-chirpy personality frozen, much like the curse of the wicked witch in those fairy tales we read. The person is dying to let his emotions out and let people see who he is, but since very little light escapes out due to the tough mask and veneer, that it is an uphill task. Then the sheer anger at not being understood, subconsciously plays havoc and then he gets to be the more demanding boss at work or that sullen wife or lone stranger staring in to nothingness on the park bench. These are the people that have a series of relationship disasters as their defence mechanisms are too solid to be penetrated. Some people may be naturally distant, and for them the finer and higher emotions probably don't register as much as they do in the average person. These guys are cut out for careers ranging from lighthouse keepers to morgue attendants to hangmen, where being emotional has no place. There are still others who swing the other extreme by showing so much of emotion that it is scary for others to take them on. Their emotional side is so overwhelming and demanding that it is actually a clever subterfuge on their part to drive people away as they subconsciously do not want people to get to know their real side. They generally don a mask of humor and good cheer and are great fun to be with. In reality, they are alone and scared and perhaps hurt emotionally. So, they feel safe to display emotions to masses rather than individuals. These people make good evangelists and rock stars as they can safely display and get an emotional discharge without running the risk of a one-on-one emotional exchange where they are afraid they would be hurt. If you encounter such a person who looks askance at you displaying your emotions, then it is better for you to talk things out and maybe put things in perspective. Of course, this all depends on whether you are emotional enough to maybe give someone a chance by understanding what drives them to do the things they do. Let me assure you the ice will thaw if the intention is genuine and well meant.
Aerobics: dancing your way to healthAerobic exercise is any comprehensive activity that makes you breathe hard while exercising your large muscle groups at a standard, even pace. The body uses stored carbohydrates and fats for energy. What is aerobics? Aerobic literally means having or providing oxygen or an activity that takes place only in the presence of oxygen. What is aerobic exercise? Aerobic exercise is any comprehensive activity that makes you breathe hard while exercising your large muscle groups at a standard, even pace. The body burns stored carbohydrates and fats for energy. Thus aerobic exercises help the body to utilize oxygen efficiently with increase in respiration and heart rate. What are the best ways to do aerobic exercises? There are number of ways by which you can exercise aerobically. Some easy and best ways are: walking, running, biking, using stationary bike, using stair stepper, elliptical machines or rowing machines, or joining an aerobic exercise class Benefits of aerobic exercises Fat reduction: Aerobics burns calories and body fats directly while using oxygen to produce energy. So this is the healthiest way to get rid of extra fat.  Strong heart: Aerobic exercises not only use your larger muscle groups like hamstrings, but also strengthen the heart muscles. This improves heart function resulting in improvement of blood and oxygen supply to all body parts, which provides healthy nourishment to body cell and removes toxins. Improves breathing: Exercises improve your lung capacity and function,which improves oxygenation, or competence of respiratory system to deliver oxygen to all body parts. It also improves overall health of the respiratory system. Cholesterol control: LDL cholesterol is bad cholesterol mostly responsible for clogging of arteries and HDL is good cholesterol. Aerobic exercises invariable increase the amount of HDL and lower LDL cholesterol thus preventing fat deposition and plaque formation and maintaining optimal blood supply to heart. Other benefits: Aerobics is the best exercise when it comes to prevention of various diseases like hypertension, diabetes, stroke and arthritis and osteoporosis. It helps to keep mood elevated and cures depression and boosts immunity. Make sure to incorporate some form of aerobic exercise in your daily routine.  
Beating the weight loss plateauThere comes a stage when you stop losing any weight in spite of strict exercise and diet regimen. This is called as weight loss plateau. When calorie intake is reduced along with exercise, the energy required is obtained from stored fat which eventually leads to weight loss. This rate of weight loss slows down and eventually stops once body reaches its set point of metabolism. This set point varies from person to person. So what can you do next? Here are some easy ways to get the weighing scale budging: Modify diet pattern: Metabolism slows down with lowering calorie intake. To reset metabolism, you need to have an adequate amount of calories. This can be done by including fruits and vegetables, whole grains, and proteins in diet. More energy is needed to burn proteins than carbohydrates or fats. Eat within half an hour or hour after exercising. Add proteins and carbohydrates to diet. Sip water: Increase total water intake in a day. Drink water before, during and after exercise and throughout the day. Change the workout: Change the exercises you do daily. Muscles get accustomed to a routine workout. Switching exercises and continually challenging helps burn more fat and build lean tissue. Change the type and time or duration of exercise. Try cycling instead of running if you have been doing it for long. Running, swimming, dancing, and Pilates too are good options. Skipping and brisk walking help in burning calories too and break the plateau. In the gym, change the exercise or number of repetitions. If you have been working on machines for long, try weight training or floor exercises. Take rest: Adequate rest is essential for the body to rejuvenate. Muscles, tendons, and ligaments get slight internal and external injuries which can be healed by rest. Proper rest helps repair and regenerate the tissue and makes them strong. Make these changes and get the needle on that weighing scale to budge.
10 simple ways to get rid of hiccupsHiccups are simply a sudden involuntary contraction of the diaphragm. Diaphragm is the muscle on which the lungs rest and it is above the stomach. The contractions happen several times within a minute and goes on for several minutes. Every contraction is followed by the sound 'hic'. And hence the name - hiccups. Sometimes hiccups can occur in the most awkward situations - just before an important interview, just as you lie down on the bed to sleep, or even during a meeting. Hiccups in difficult situation can be a big problem. Some simple tricks could help you get rid of them. It helps to know different techniques you can use to stop hiccups, for only one may not always work. Hold your breath: Inhale deep and long, and then hold on to the breath. This may help the diaphragm to relax and hiccups will stop. Drink warm water: Take about ten or more big gulps of water, with quick swallowing. This will help the irritation of diaphragm to go away. Close your ears: Use a thick small roll of cotton or use your fingers to plug your ears and close it. Do this for about 30 seconds. Alternatively, you can also firmly press upon the soft tissue of the ears from behind, next to the ear lobes. This helps to relax a nerve which then relaxes the diaphragm. Take your tongue out: Pull out your tongue, as out as you can and keep it that way for a few seconds. This helps in better breathing, relaxing any spasms that may be causing the hiccups. Breathe with mouth covered: Press both your palms over your mouth to close it and continue breathing only through the nose. This intends to create a discomfort that will cause some distraction for the nerves and the hiccups will stop. Breathe in a paper bag: Breathe deeply into a paper bag. Do not cover your whole face with the paper bag, just the nose and mouth. Hug yourself: Pull your knees up, close to the chest and wrap your arms around. Hug yourself tight for a couple of minutes. The pressure also helps to relax the diaphragm. Have some sugar: Have a spoonful of plain grainy sugar and keep it in the mouth. Swallow slowly. Lemon at your service: Pick a piece of lemon, put it in your mouth, and let it be there. Do not chew; just suck it slowly for a few minutes. This will also help the hiccups go away. Just wait:  Nine out of ten times, the hiccups will go away on their own, after giving you a little trouble, of course. If you are not too uncomfortable with hiccups, be patient and give them a few minutes. Most likely, they will pass off as spontaneously as they had come. "I think hiccup cures were really invented for the amusement of the patient's friends." - Bill Watterson
Is sex linked to self esteem?Man is a curious creature, full of quirks and contradictions. Sexual intercourse, something that most people consider an intimate and private experience, is spoken about in hushed tones and often, with some discomfort. We don't reveal or talk about our sexual desires, as readily we discuss our salary packages or food habits. This is quite ironic seeing how sex is an important gauge for a person's self esteem and also an indicator of his/her social desirability. The very thing that we do under covers, we somehow choose to "keep under cover". The Link between Sex and Self Esteem: Self esteem is an important factor that determines the mental & physical well-being of an individual. All of us have a craving to be understood, liked and appreciated; and these form the equivalent of our basic needs on the inverted pyramid- Food, clothing and shelter. For a human being to flourish and prosper, consumable food, without the mental food of appreciation, is not enough; and sexual intercourse or an intimacy with the opposite sex, is one way of validating that need. Sex therefore, ceases to be just a physical need instilled by nature for the perpetuation of the species, but goes into the larger emotional cum psychological dimension of self actualization and realization. Though some of us might be embarrassed to broach the topic of 'whether or not we are getting enough', the truth is that every human seeks to achieve his sexual potential, even while he or she might, not be aware of it. Most of us have the ability to get the foods matching our taste preferences onto our plates, but with sex, this could be a little difficult, since sex, is a complex subject with a lot of social, moral and religious links. The truth is evident in the number of marriages (the very cornerstones of civil society) that fail on the basis of sexual compatibility, either by setting unrealistic sexual expectations or by not owning up to, or even identifying, one's sexual needs. This has repercussions on the psyche and self-esteem of a person, and this is especially true in the case of men in particular, as they may feel completely inferior for not being able to attract a sexual partner matching his desires. In some people, this also leads to a case of self-loathing, for having sexual needs which a partner doesn't understand, or much worse, needs which are considered taboo and sinful (Homosexuality, Anal Sex, Group Sex, Fetishes, etc.) These complex emotions can wreak  havoc on a person's self-esteem, by creating severe internal conflicts and serious self-doubts. Now socially, sex can either liberate a person, or hold him prisoner. At times, the unfulfilled needs may get repressed and banished to the shadows, only to be played out later, in the form of sexual adventurism and crime. Just one look at the sexual crimes in our society today, and we can clearly understand just how healthy our collective self esteem is! The very society that frowns upon prostitution, is actually responsible for creating it, though everybody would like to pretend otherwise. The crux of the matter is that "sex" and "self esteem" are closely related; and one should not shy away from addressing any issues one might face regarding one's sexuality. Physical love is necessary for the survival of a relationship and one needs to make time and efforts to successfully create one's own sexual space. The positive effects of a good sex life can be seen in an increased work productivity, fewer illnesses and an increase in one's overall efficiency. Some people are haunted by sexual guilt and confusion and when they keep it all locked up, they suffer from unexplained physical pains and feel 'down in the dumps' mentally. Another problem with appreciation from the opposite sex, is the addiction to  external validation. Some people feel utterly worthless until they receive positive feedback about their looks or abilities on a regular basis. This can be downright devastating, as in these cases, there is a great dependence on external factors for one to feel good. While no one denies the "feel good factor" of sexual appreciation, it is up to each one of us, to decide just how much of control one must be giving to external factors, to determine our personal self-esteem. The appreciation may be theirs, but the esteem is entirely of the self and only the self can decide how much of appreciation and sex is enough.
Internet and sex : Decoding virtual pornographyPornography is broadly categorized as softcore or hardcore. While hardcore contains intensive and highly graphic forms of sexual content, softcore constitutes less intensive form of sexual content. Genres of pornography are determined on the basis of the type of content and the status of the participants. The common sub-genres are ethnic, fetish, reality, group, and amateur. There are also sexual content specially created for different sexual orientations: heterosexual, homosexual, and bisexual. While sexual needs are natural and part of our biological set-up, the use of pornography is widely criticized for putting forward a partial portrayal of who a human being is. Majority of the pornographic material express a human only in sexual terms- as being someone looking for sexual endeavors- without paying attention to and inclusion of the person's emotional and mental state. The explication of human beings as purely sexual beings closes the eyes of the viewers many a times to the emotional and mental aspect of sexual intercourse, thus perverting the way they look at sexual intercourse in their relationships. Since sex is not holistically discussed on public platform as part of a healthy relationship and one only has access to understanding sexual practice through pornography which portrays a certain mechanistic and physically-induced aspect of sexual acts, viewing of pornography comes with the risk of sex addiction. Moreover, since pornography generally engages participants whose possess bodies which are conventionally considered sexually appealing, the viewers could implicitly get dissatisfied with their sex lives due to non-duplication of the same form of bodies in real life. Medical researches have also found that apart from having unreal expectations from one's partners, the viewer might find themselves lowly in sexual matters due to the sexual practices performed on the pornographic content that can be difficult to duplicate or are disliked. The portrayal of women in pornography is generally of persons who have no issues with being dominated over and who find such domination also sexually arousing. However, such a view is overwhelmingly false and a viewer on a regular fodder of such pornography could end up with deeply flawed perspective on women. Lastly, pornography also expresses various types of perverse forms of sex which are harmful to society, especially vulnerable groups. These include child sex, office-related sexual content, rough and rape sex, and public sexual acts. While pornography is a sure avenue to possibility of sexual perversion, healthy ways of satisfying one's sexual needs must be acknowledged and taken up. Moreover, it is integral that socially, sexual intercourse is recognized as a healthy part of emotional relationship. It needs not only absorbed as a purely physical act which is morally judged and shunned- the latter approach only increases the probability of pornography being seen as a last resort to learn about sex. In talking about sex as a natural process between mutually approving adults and as part of emotional relationship, we reduce the chances of sex being seen as a non-emotional activity and allow for there to be holistic understanding of sexual intercourse. For adolescents who are entering the age of sexual maturation, it is integral to introduce the physical relation between persons as being a result of emotional relationships, with understanding of the body holistically - as a harmony between physical and mental states. In the case of non-presence of holistic guidance, the chances of teenagers falling prey to pornography to understand sexual intercourse is high and as has been earlier explored, such an understanding of sex as activity between solely sexually-charged beings could result in perverted view of emotional relationships as well.
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