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Career advice for menGetting a job these days is extremely difficult. What is even more difficult is sticking around long enough at the job. No one is indispensable, and if you don't perform well, there are hundreds more waiting to get the job! Being the bread winner, men have to face this pressure more. Here are some tips that would do you good, if followed: Cracking The Interview: The golden rule here is to be honest. The interviewers do not want to hear what will please them; So, do not try to butter them up. They are also put off by boasting . Therefore, be honest about your views and opinions. Age:wise Attitude- When you are young, and have just entered the company, it is highly advisable to observe and learn as much as you can. Find yourself a professional mentor who can guide you. Try and build on your professional presence. Be active, spend more time with your boss, be helpful to your juniors. The golden advice for all, irrespective of seniority, is to stay clear of office gossip and politics. Keep a check on the attitude: There is no need to be arrogant, and a know-it-all. Be friendly, confident, and genuine. Learn to say no: You need to have a pleasing personality. But, avoid trying to please all. Try and learn the art of saying no firmly. Too much of 'yes' will make people take you for granted, and you will find yourself overloaded with a lot of work. Do not under price yourself: If you feel that you deserve a raise, go ahead and ask for it. Do not be afraid to ask for your worth. Often at interviews, employers cancel out candidates who under price themselves, as it shows that they will probably not perform to the expected levels. Blow your trumpet: With all humility make sure you take what is rightfully yours. If you don't take credit for the work, no one will give it to you. Worse, someone else may take it! Create boundaries: Keep your work at office. Do not bring work home. Often at the outset, to please bosses, one ends up working overtime or worse, working at home. It is important to keep both the parts of your lives separate. Keep fit too: Don't let your job take a toll on your health. Working late, sitting at the same place for hours, can be harmful for the heart. Learn to unwind periodically. Setting goals is easy. What is needed is the determination to follow the rules you have set for yourself. The way to success at work is taking the ladder, one step at a time. There is no elevator here.
The moody man - Mood swings in menMen, such jokes on a woman's monthly mood swings are passe. Recent research proves that men are equally prone to have mood swings. Have you experienced a myriad of emotions? Angry, irritated, feeling helpless, self-pity, an irrational urge to throw things and cry and be depressed all at the same time? These are signs of mood swings. And the point of interest here is that you don't have to be a woman to experience mood swings. Men face their share of mood swings too! Men undergo hormonal influence too. And like women this causes them too to be irritable and cranky. The difference here is that the hormonal fluctuations are not as severe in men as in women. So the mood change lasts for a lesser time compared to a woman. Men's moods are also affected by psychological and physiological stressors. So a man who has to work against time to meet a deadline will be very irritable. A man who is deprived of sleep will end up snapping at you for no apparent reason. The myth that men don't cry, is something that men take to heart. Men are emotional beings and it is okay to show some of the emotions. The male stereotypical image is such that if a man is expressive of his emotional side, he isn't considered macho enough. Hence men tend to internalize their emotions and feelings. Often this leads to chronic depression. Taming the mood swings. Any form of physical exercise helps keep the mood in balance. This helps in keeping the aggressiveness under check. Sex is also a great way to release the stress and feel better, rather than snapping and using profanities. Another helpful way is to ask yourself 'why'. Whenever you feel that you are doing something irrational or out of character, ask yourself why. The answer you get from yourself will help clear the situation and you will end up handling it in a mature fashion. The irritable male syndrome. This is the male equivalent of the female menopause - The Andropause. It covers the symptoms seen in middle-aged men that occur due to the drop in testosterone levels. Like women, men show mood changes, bouts of irritability, grumpiness, hypersensitivity, anxiety and frustration. The recent research on men having mood swings and the society's acceptance of these findings is very encouraging. It helps stress in the fact that men are emotional too. There is nothing anti-macho about a man crying his heart out at times. It only shows he is human, after all.
Ageing gracefully and happilyEverywhere we look there are constant reminders that we are growing old each passing day. There are creams that tell us that will make our wrinkles vanish and make us look younger. There are hair care products dyes that claim to cover our grey hair so that we can look and feel young. Our doctors tell us about how we have to take care of all our body parts to keep several diseases at bay in the old age! It is a rare and difficult attainment to grow old happily and gracefully. Is there anything good about old age? It doesn't seem so, going by the look of things. Here we give you 5 reasons that will make you look forward to old age! Old age is the happiest time in life: You are constantly living life to the fullest when you are young. Survival is your prime priority. You work hard to keep yourself and your family happy and financially stable. Too many responsibilities bog you down. Old age is the time when there is nothing of this sort. You are retired, free from all responsibilities. You have passed the baton to the younger lot. Now is the time to sit back and enjoy. Now is the time to relax and do the thing you always wanted to do. Imagine living with not a care in the world? That is old age for you. Old age is when the brain functions the best: It is a proven fact now. It was believed that we lose more brain cells as we age. Now it has been proven that our cognitive functions peak between the ages of 48 to 60. Old people make the wisest and toughest decisions quickly. People may call them worldly wise. Have you ever given a thought to how all the judges are old men? And how when someone says the word 'wise' the picture formed is usually of an old man with a beard? No more fashion policing: When you are young, there is a lot of stereotyping involved! Going to a board meeting, wear formals? Going for a lunch meeting, wear something that is suitable keeping in mind the place. Are you at a certain position in life? Dress accordingly! So many restrictions! Old age comes with none of this. You can wear what you please and no one will really mind! Only when you actually get to do it will you realize how much f a relief it is! Relationships improve: According to a 2011 study; married oldies are more satisfied and positive about their marriages than young couples are. Arguments involve less anger, and senior spouses show more positive emotions and affection than middle-aged couples. It's not only marriages, however, that benefit in older age. Seniors also seem to be happier with their other social relationships too. They have a smaller but closer circle of friends and gain more benefits from these close, emotional bonds. Old Age makes you feel better on the whole: You have lived life to its fullest, your kids have now flown the coop and you have seen it all. As you age, you start feeling better about things in general. You look at things more positively and make the fullest of every situation presented to you. You live in the moment and are not worried about future repercussions. Old age is a happy place to be. Look forward to aging positively.
Activities to help your toddler talkWe understand how eager parents are to talk to their kid. They want to hear their soft voice and babble talks. So start teaching them as soon as possible to help them to speak fast and clear. Here are some activities which will help you to teach your kid to talk. The playful ways: The best way of teaching your kid to speak is to, well,play. Most of the learning is done through playing. Be a child with your child. Act playfully foolish --kids enjoy that a lot. And when the kid is happy and in playful mood, they try to talk. Building vocabulary: Use a word in more than one sentence to make them understand the meaning of the word. For example, 'The color of leaves is green' and 'Your father is wearing a green colored shirt.' If the kids hear a word used often in different sentences, it becomes a permanent part of their vocabulary. Give them practical examples: Teach them the names of the things they see around. Or get actual objects and be descriptive to teach them the name of the object and talk about the object's features. Use a toy phone: You must have seen kids trying to talk over phone to their dads or friends. They try to copy you the way you talk over phone. It can be a great way to teach them to speak. Pretend that you are talking to the kid's dad or grandparents, and pass over the phone to the kid and encourage them to chitchat over the phone. Story telling: Kids listen to the stories very carefully. Show them the pictures in the storybook and describe them with the story. Then repeat the same story the next day. Ask your child if she/he remembers what was there in the story by showing them the picture. Help them if they get stuck. Sing together with the child: Music is another amusing way to teach the child to speak. Listen to a song, sing and dance along. Encourage the child to dance and sing with you. Children are great at learning lyrics of a song. Reward the child on completing a task: When you reward the child with his/her favourite toy or snack, they understand the benefit of performing the task. And they take effort to get the reward. Ask your child to recite a poem for you, or speak a certain word or sentence and entice the child by showing him the reward he will get on completing the task.  
Faking illnesses - An illness in itself?In 2008, a 28 years old woman in the US shared some shocking news with her friends. She had been detected with cancer. She posted updates on social networking sites and wrote blogs on her illness. Sympathy poured in from all corners. Some even sent in monetary help to cover her expenses. The saddest part of the incident though was not her cancer; it was the fact that she had faked it! Police investigations revealed her little trick when no evidences or records were found at the hospitals! Apparently, this isn't a unique case;  faking illnesses or malingering is a very common occurrence. All of us have done it at some point in our lives. While we may have done it to escape a school punishment or to take undue advantage of the office 'sick leaves' for personal purposes, it is usually done on a harmless level. But faking illness can be a chronic disorder too and  medical professionals even have a name for it-; Munchausen's Syndrome. People suffering from this syndrome fake illnesses that they don't actually have, to gain sympathy or simply to be the center of attention. Usually gaining sympathy is the main reason why people fake illnesses. It gives them a chance to be in the spotlight. Everyone calls and visits, expresses concern and fusses over them. Lots of love is showered upon them. Another common reason for faking illnesses, is money and at times, the monetary benefits are higher than the emotional ones. No one hesitates to fulfill the last wish of a dying person, however expensive it may be. Often there are mixed motivations and the person faking an illness has many reasons to keep up the pretense of being sick, for as long as possible. Some people really do have a disease — a mental illness known as a factitious disorder. People with this disorder pretend to have an illness, which is usually a terminal one and often go to great lengths to maintain their hoax. Munchausen syndrome by proxy, is another form of faking illness. People with this disorder, fake illnesses of people under their care; and they usually do this, for monetary benefits. Children are the most common victims in this disease. When you tell someone that your child has cancer, you will receive a great amount of sympathy and all the money you want, no questions asked! People with these disorders are extremely cunning. They go to great extents to maintain their lies. They will build grand stories, complain of fake pains and aches, get admitted to hospitals and undergo a battery of tests, numerous times. Interestingly, they never allow and frequently discourage medical professionals, from talking to any of their family members. Since they know they are faking the illness, they will refuse to undergo treatment, for obvious reasons. . If you think a loved one may be exaggerating or faking their health issues, attempt a gentle conversation, voicing your concerns. Avoid anger, judgment or confrontation, while offering support and care and if possible, help them in finding a treatment. Treatment includes empathy, helping in identifying feelings and issues that led to the development of the disorder and finding  alternative healthy ways to deal with those feelings and issues.
Where does your happiness lie? - Importance of emotional well-beingAn emotionally well person is characterized by ability to handle and adapt to changes, to efficiently deal with stress, has a positive self-image and can take decisions independently to cater to his needs. Striving forward with a sense of purpose, an emotionally strong person has the capacity to build and sustain fruitful relationships without over-dependence. Being emotionally well does not imply that you do not experience pain and suffering. Pain and suffering is an essential part of every person's life. The strength of your emotional well-being is determined by how you look at and react to them. Those who are emotionally well can treat their adversities as opportunities to change and move ahead with greater strength. Signs of an emotionally ill person include stress, frustration, discomfort with changes, negativity in thoughts, and unreasonable paranoia about the intention of other's actions, discontent, and depression. There is also the feeling of guilt over inability to hold relationships and of not being able to keep others happy. You may also find yourself unworthy and feel that you do not deserve to be happy. Such sensation of low self-worth fuels the need to look for other ways to feel relaxed - thus, resulting in substance dependence. In cases of severe emotional ill-being, one could experience sleeplessness, hopelessness, suicidal, and uncontrollable negative thoughts. Relation between emotional and physical well-being: Emotional well-being is closely related to your physical body. They share a symbiotic relation with one another.By taking care of your body, you allow balanced production of hormones and smooth functioning of the other body parts - allowing them to respond efficiently during tough situations and also assisting the body to cope with physically challenging conditions. By being emotionally strong, you will also contribute towards faster and effective treatment of your body from illnesses. Your emotional well-being is determined by the following factors: family background, companionships, past history of relationships, sensitivity to nature and genetic dispositions. Those who come from troubled family background find it harder to associate in a healthy way with others during their adulthood. In many cases genetically, a person has greater propensity towards being emotionally weak - though this can be controlled and molded into strength by one's own actions. Depending on the type of educational institutions you attended, your companionships could be those which built your self-image positively or which hindered your capacity to take care of yourself (due to instances of bullying and teasing). Past romantic relationships also determine how you deal with your emotions in the present. Those who are sensitive to nature have been found to have greater consideration for human beings as well as non-human beings around them. Every factor is a condition which can be shaped by the efforts of the individual. Emotional well-being is primarily built on the belief that you can create your own reality by choosing your actions. How to promote your emotional well-being? Be optimistic :  Emotional and mental well-being is majorly decided by how you look at your life. Even though you have many sufferings, are you able to accept them and find ways to get through them, knowing that the good is yet to come? Flip through the inspiring stories of people around you to motivate optimism. Find your beauty : Listen to the needs of your body and do not impose your mental ideas of beauty on it. Beauty of each person is determined by their unique characteristics. Do not let the conventional standards of beauty pull you down. Know that you are unique and beauty is not necessarily an external but an inner state of mind. Stay with those who care for you : You might see the need to sacrifice your happiness for others in some instances. However, if you find yourself doing that 8 out of 10 times in any relationship, it is time to seriously reconsider how you wish to live. Is your happiness being taken for granted? Are you running this relationship because you are afraid of being alone, knowing that it is going nowhere in the future? Those who care for you will show it through their actions. The best way to love yourself is by being able to see yourself through their eyes. Take care of your body :  Get adequate sleep daily and make sure your body gets lots of nutritious food. Don't let the advertisements decide the needs of your body. Try out different cuisines and let your body tell you which one it feels is most suitable. Exercise moderately everyday by taking a walk in a green area with your loved one (Remember that the point of exercising is not only to lose weight, but to sweat away your stress daily in fun ways!) Follow your heart : Do what you love. There is nothing that could harm your emotional well-being more than doing something which you know is not right and which you do not want to do. Confucius has dropped us a fortune cookie of happiness when he said that in choosing a job you love, you will never have to work a single day of your life. Get a pet companion :  Adopt an animal and take care of it. In taking care of the pet, you will realize and gradually get in touch with yourself, becoming aware of who you are as a human being. This could be the starting point of discovering your true potentials. Volunteer at social services : Let your creativity and emotions flow by connecting to those around you. Depending on your interests, choose a type of social service - old age home, orphanage, animal shelter, being with terminally ill people, and so on. Such activities will help to positively channelize your emotions.
Fruit diet can be dangerousFruits are healthy and provide lots of nutrition, vitamins, antioxidants, carbohydrates, fibre and bioflavanoids to the body.These things together protect your body from different health conditions and heart disease. However if you only eat fruit, you miss many other essential nutrients such as fats and protein. This can upset your stomach and lead to indigestion. Hence it is very important to take a well-balanced diet to remain healthy. Check out why you should not rely solely on fruits for living. Fruits do not provide protein Protein is highly important for your growth and development. By eating only fruits, you are restricting your intake of proteins that can stop your overall development process. Your body requires calories and energy on a regular basis. Each cell of your body contains protein. To keep your body cells in top working condition it is important that you include protein-rich foods such as lentils, soy products,  nuts and beans in your regular diet. You can also consume low-fat dairy, lean meat, fish and skinless poultry to provide required amount of protein to your body. Fruits do not provide fat Although excess of fat is not good for health, it is essential that your body requires on daily basis to ensure smooth functioning of your immune system and also to help your body absorb various minerals and vitamins provided by other foods like fruit. If you continue being a fruitarian for long duration, the chances of stroke due to brain haemorrhage increases. According to health experts, you should get around 20 to 35 percent of your daily calories from fat. To provide your body with good fats you should include soybean, sunflower, olive or canola oil in your diet. Fish and poultry also provide good amount of healthy fats to the body. Too much of fruits can lead to digestive problems Fruits provide fibres to the body in large amounts. Although your body needs fibre as it is one of the essential nutrients, getting too much of fibre can lead to side effects. Fibre works as broom to clear of your abdomen and aid in the digestion process. However, too much of fibre leads to stomach problems and cause symptoms such as gas, cramps and bloating. Sometimes it may also lead to chronic diarrhoea, dehydration and loose stools. On a regular basis, a woman requires only 22 to 28 gm of fiber per day and a man needs 34 to 38 gm. Apart from fruits, seeds, vegetables and whole grains also provide fibre to the body. Other considerations If you limit your intake to fruits, you may not get enough calories required for producing the required amount of energy. Consuming calories less than 1100 per day can lead to lot of side-effects such as intolerance to cold, gallstones, hair loss and fatigue. So although fruits taste wonderful and are very tempting, being a fruitarian is not the best thing for your health. Your body needs all the nutrients for carrying out its different activities and hence you should include variety of foods in your diet.  
Good and bad calories-How do they affect weight loss?Not all calories are bad calories. Surprisingly very few people are aware that good calories are quintessential for burning fat and can rather help you in losing weight. So, it's very important to know how to differentiate between good calories and the bad ones. What is a Calorie? In scientific terms, one calorie equals to one unit of energy. When the term calorie is being used in relation to nutrition, it means consumption of energy through what you drink and eat and use of energy for carrying physical activity. Many people think that in nutritional terminology, calories are only associated with drink and food; but the truth of the matter is that everything has energy is calories. For example, since coal provides you energy it contains calories. 7,004,684,512 calories are equal to energy produced by 1-ton of coal. Coming back to weight loss, 100 calories of fiber and protein is not similar to 100 calories of a cake. This is because there are good and bad calories and much like us humans all calories are not equal. Calories are the measuring units of energy that are produced by the food once it reaches your body. This energy works on the law of physics and hence less energy intake leads to weight loss and vice versa. Varying types of Calories Different types of food provide varying calories or energy amount to the body. The analysis of a tightly scrutinized weight loss experiment has revealed that when people of two different groups were fed the same measure of calories albeit from varying food sources, the weight loss was almost similar. However, the effects of weight loss were variable; like uncontrolled emotions, cravings, hunger and more. This happened for the same reason that some calories are good and some calories are bad. Good and bad calories Sugar is a powerhouse of energy. But if you keep on eating only sugar all day long it will be suicidal. This is because; the calories present in the sugar are devoid of any nutrients and your body cannot function without the right balance of different minerals, nutrients and vitamins. Most food not only carry calories but they also constitute a complex mixture of additives, fiber and nutrients. These mixtures of varying components directly affect the leptin hormone that controls the hunger trigger in your body. These hormones tell the body to either burn the fat or store it. The process of weight loss is made complicated by the fact that biologically our body is programmed to protect the fat stores so that they can be utilized during starvation. So, the question remain, which calories should you eat to lose weight but still keep on getting the required amount of energy? Eating lean protein, healthy fats and unrefined and unprocessed carbohydrates such as fruits, beans and vegetables are the best for losing weight. Calories with more nutrients are the best The foods that do not store fat and make us eat again and again, are the ones you should eat as good calorie food. Choosing them is simple. These are the same food that humans used to eat before processed food was invented. For example; avoid using the processed whole grains and switch over to brown rice instead of the polished white rice. Also, stone-ground whole wheat, oats or quinoa bread is much better than the white bread. Replace the processed carbohydrates from your platter with whole grains and vegetables to lose weight, control hypertension and blood sugar. Use fats derived from plant sources such as olive oil or nut oil. Eat lean protein more such as chicken and fish.
Is sex linked to self esteem?Man is a curious creature, full of quirks and contradictions. Sexual intercourse, something that most people consider an intimate and private experience, is spoken about in hushed tones and often, with some discomfort. We don't reveal or talk about our sexual desires, as readily we discuss our salary packages or food habits. This is quite ironic seeing how sex is an important gauge for a person's self esteem and also an indicator of his/her social desirability. The very thing that we do under covers, we somehow choose to "keep under cover". The Link between Sex and Self Esteem: Self esteem is an important factor that determines the mental & physical well-being of an individual. All of us have a craving to be understood, liked and appreciated; and these form the equivalent of our basic needs on the inverted pyramid- Food, clothing and shelter. For a human being to flourish and prosper, consumable food, without the mental food of appreciation, is not enough; and sexual intercourse or an intimacy with the opposite sex, is one way of validating that need. Sex therefore, ceases to be just a physical need instilled by nature for the perpetuation of the species, but goes into the larger emotional cum psychological dimension of self actualization and realization. Though some of us might be embarrassed to broach the topic of 'whether or not we are getting enough', the truth is that every human seeks to achieve his sexual potential, even while he or she might, not be aware of it. Most of us have the ability to get the foods matching our taste preferences onto our plates, but with sex, this could be a little difficult, since sex, is a complex subject with a lot of social, moral and religious links. The truth is evident in the number of marriages (the very cornerstones of civil society) that fail on the basis of sexual compatibility, either by setting unrealistic sexual expectations or by not owning up to, or even identifying, one's sexual needs. This has repercussions on the psyche and self-esteem of a person, and this is especially true in the case of men in particular, as they may feel completely inferior for not being able to attract a sexual partner matching his desires. In some people, this also leads to a case of self-loathing, for having sexual needs which a partner doesn't understand, or much worse, needs which are considered taboo and sinful (Homosexuality, Anal Sex, Group Sex, Fetishes, etc.) These complex emotions can wreak  havoc on a person's self-esteem, by creating severe internal conflicts and serious self-doubts. Now socially, sex can either liberate a person, or hold him prisoner. At times, the unfulfilled needs may get repressed and banished to the shadows, only to be played out later, in the form of sexual adventurism and crime. Just one look at the sexual crimes in our society today, and we can clearly understand just how healthy our collective self esteem is! The very society that frowns upon prostitution, is actually responsible for creating it, though everybody would like to pretend otherwise. The crux of the matter is that "sex" and "self esteem" are closely related; and one should not shy away from addressing any issues one might face regarding one's sexuality. Physical love is necessary for the survival of a relationship and one needs to make time and efforts to successfully create one's own sexual space. The positive effects of a good sex life can be seen in an increased work productivity, fewer illnesses and an increase in one's overall efficiency. Some people are haunted by sexual guilt and confusion and when they keep it all locked up, they suffer from unexplained physical pains and feel 'down in the dumps' mentally. Another problem with appreciation from the opposite sex, is the addiction to  external validation. Some people feel utterly worthless until they receive positive feedback about their looks or abilities on a regular basis. This can be downright devastating, as in these cases, there is a great dependence on external factors for one to feel good. While no one denies the "feel good factor" of sexual appreciation, it is up to each one of us, to decide just how much of control one must be giving to external factors, to determine our personal self-esteem. The appreciation may be theirs, but the esteem is entirely of the self and only the self can decide how much of appreciation and sex is enough.
Busting misconceptions about homosexualityIn the past few years, homosexuality has become a subject of public discourse in India. Thanks to gay pride marches and the Delhi High Court's historic ruling decriminalizing same-sex intercourse in 2009, more people today are willing to accept homosexuality as normal. However, there are still a large number of people who are still confused about whether homosexuality is normal. Homosexuals are people who get attracted to people of the same gender. Gay is a term used for both male and female homosexuals, but some prefer the term 'lesbian' when it comes to women homosexuals. Some misinformed people consider homosexuality as a purely decadent western phenomenon which is far from the truth. Homosexuality finds its place in recorded history throughout the world. So is homosexuality abnormal? A few decades ago a gay person would have ended up on a psychiatrist's couch where attempts would have been made to re-orient him/her towards the heterosexuality. However, as the American Psychology Association notes, "No, lesbian, gay, and bisexual orientations are not disorders. Research has found no inherent association between any of these sexual orientations and psychopathology. Both heterosexual behavior and homosexual behavior are normal aspects of human sexuality." Some scientists are trying to find a genetic link to homosexuality. Results so far have not established a definite link. A whole lot of factors could play a role in deciding sexual orientation - genetic, hormonal, developmental, social, and cultural. One cannot safely conclude that being "gay" is in one's genes and is therefore, hereditary. Legalizing gay marriages Same-sex marriage is legally recognized in several jurisdictions within the United States. As of April 2013, nine states—Connecticut, Iowa, Maine, Maryland, Massachusetts, New Hampshire, New York, Vermont, and Washington—as well as the District of Columbia and three Native American tribes[1]—have legalized same-sex marriage, representing 15.7% of the US population.
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