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Absent father, violent kids!When children are growing up, they undergo a lot of hormonal changes and have varying emotional requirements. If these requirements are not fulfilled by the presence of both parents, they can develop into violent adults. Single parenting for a mother, is extremely difficult; it is simply impossible for her to fill the void left behind by an absent father. When a couple cannot live under the same roof due to major differences, they separate or get divorced. However, the requirements of the children remains the same; they still need the care and love of their mother and the support and guidance of their father, to grow up without any complications or insecurities. Children usually look up to their father as a symbol of strength and security and in his absence, they might not receive the same support and may feel inadequate and insecure. If during their childhood kids do not get the support and security that only a father can provide, they might bottle up the feelings inside; and these feelings usually explode when they grow into violent adults. A Father's Absence is Critical Due to whatever reasons, if the father is not present in the family during the most important growing periods of the kids, they have more chances of turning to crime and drugs, than the children who have a father by their side. According to a research conducted by the Research Institute of the McGill University Health Center located in Quebec, a father's absence, especially during the child's prime growing period, can lead to behavioral problems when they grow into adults. The research was carried out on mice raised only by their mothers and showed that the mice that were brought up in the absence of their fathers, were  abnormal and aggressive in their social interactions. Gabriella Gobbi, who is an author and a senior associate professor at the McGill University - Faculty of Medicine, says that even though the experiment was carried out on mice, the findings are highly relevant to the behavior of humans, under similar circumstances. Role of Fathers and Fatherhood Another research carried out by Dr. David Popenoe, a renowned sociologist, throws light on the role of fatherhood and fathers. According to Popenoe, fathers should not be treated as mere second adults in the family. Fathers, who are more involved in their family, have a certain positive impact on the children, which no other person is capable of. Fatherhood is an important responsibility and the presence of fathers in a family, directly influences the well-being of the growing children. In the absence of fathers, mothers may try their level best to provide their children with the right kind of upbringing and education. However, they might fail to give the kids the support and strength that only a father can provide. Due to this, children fail to face the challenges of life head on and are unable to handle their problems with an open mind. When a lot of emotions get bottled up inside, in most cases, they find their release in the form of violence. Sometimes, children also lack the right kind of guidance in their growing years and mothers fail to handle their changing emotional requirements, due to which these kids become increasingly frustrated and violent as they grow up.  
Hairy tale: Hirsutism in womenThe condition is called Hirsutism where women grow coarse hair just like males on the face, chest or elsewhere. The primary cause for Hirsutism is hormonal imbalances by the over stimulation or excess production of male hormones (present in minute quantities in females too). The thickness of hair that grows largely depends on our genes and at times Hirsutism in women may be just a hereditary trait rather than an imbalance. Self care and medication can take of it in such a case. Idiopathic Hirsutism is a type of this condition where there is no possible cause for the male type hair growth. These women have regular menstrual cycles and no Androgen excesses, yet they have Hisrutism. Hirsutism with excessive bodily and facial hair, usually in a male pattern, in women may be present in normal adults as an expression of an ethnic characteristic or may develop in children or adults as the result of androgen excess due to tumors, or of non-androgenetic or other drugs. Hirsutism can make its appearance at menopause or soon after as there are a lot of hormonal changes that occur in the female body, and in certain cases women grow hair even on the lip, nipples, abdomen and upper shoulders. And just as men go bald there can also be a receding hairline and baldness in women accompanied by a deepening of the voice and enlargement of the clitoris. If the hair growth occurs at puberty then a doctor's evaluation is most essential as it could be more than just Hirsutism.
Just how sporty is your sports bra?Very few women in the world really know the right size of their bra and end up using wrong size bra all their life. A study shows that all over the world only 2 women out of 10 wear the right sized bra due to which they can never get the look they want. Since there is lot of difference in sports bra of different brands, you need time and patience to find out the most suitable one for you. You should keep on measuring yourself every year, and especially if you have added weight or lost weight. It is also necessary to check your bra-size after pregnancy.  On an average, the size of sports bra range from A to H and most women find a comfortable fit among either of this size. A good sports bra should always offer three things- support, comfort and breathability to the breasts. Choosing a Bra with a Good Fit Most of the elite bra shops offer good range of different sports bra. But it is important to know which one suits you or is of your size. A well fitting bra gives you the liberty to exercise or move with confidence and comfort. One thing you should keep in mind while purchasing a sports bra is your life style and preferences. Some like it padded, some like it embroidered, while some may like it simple. So apart from correct measurements, your style should be given preference while buying a sports bra. Moreover, you also should take into consideration the dress you are wearing on this bra. Here are some tips that can help you in selecting the right bra when you will go to the lingerie shop. Support   A good bra should offer your breast complete support, irrespective of whether they are small, medium or even big. If you have breasts ranging in between A to C cup, you should choose a compression bra that offers more comfort and support. If you are looking for a bra that also encapsulates and gives proper shape to your breasts then you should choose a bra accordingly. These bras offer more support than the compression bra. For getting both comfort and support, you can choose a compression bra that also encapsulates your breasts properly. Comfort You should feel comfortable when you wear a bra. It should stay in place and should not chafe. If possible, try one of the samples in the changing room and check whether the straps dig into your shoulders or whether the bands provide comfortable support to the breasts. The bra should hold the breasts comfortably without being restrictive. A good bra is one that holds your breasts in place even when you are performing all the jumping, running and swinging acts. Breathability The fabric of the sports bra should be good enough to wick away the sweat from the skin so that it dries quickly and allows the skin to breathe properly. The bra should allow excess heat and perspiration to pass through the fabric keeping you dry and cool during summer &  warm and dry during winter.  
Your bundle of joy comes with bundles of fascinating facts Blue-eyed wonder: Most babies are born blue-eyed. The melanin pigment that decides the color of the eyes is not developed at the time of birth. So the babies are born with blue/light eyes irrespective of the genetic makeup. By the time the baby is 6-7 months old, the pigments start developing and the baby's eye colour changes as per the genetic makeup of the parents. Marked for life: One in every three infant is born with a birthmark! No tears: That is true! New born babies do not shed any tears. The lacrimal duct and the tear glands are well developed but they produce just enough tears for lubrication. Actual tears start appearing after one month of age. Crawling wonders: New research has found that babies can crawl almost as soon as they are born. When left to themselves, they are quite capable of using their limbs and find their way to food i.e. the mother's breast.And we thought that they are tiny helpless creatures! Temperature sensitivity: Babies are much more sensitive to temperature changes and body heat.Though the baby can't throw off the clothes to cool down, it is smart enough to do other things. When the baby is cold, it will move around more and if it is too hot it may just lie still as if sunbathing. Touch therapy: Touch is the most highly developed sensation in babies, even in premature ones. The touch sensation develops from head to toe with the mouth being the most sensitive. No wonder they tend to put everything in their mouths. Short-sighted: Babies are short sighted at birth. Their vision is set to a limit of 8-to-12 inches. They can see people and objects clearly only if they are within this range. Brain size: The brain grows at such a rate in newborns that by the end of the first year,the brain is double the birth size and half its final size! Palmar Grasp: New born babies have a strong grip, as strong as a monkey's. The grip is so strong that if you dangle them on one hand, they can support their own weight. This probably originated from the primitive survival instinct. This strong grasp reduces after a couple of months. Taste buds: Babies have more than 10,000 taste buds situated all over the tongue and even at the roof and sides. As they grow, these extra taste buds disappear.
Be positive. Here's howAs someone so very rightly said, "We are the sum total of our thoughts". So the more positive thoughts you have, or are capable of thinking, the more positive will be the outcome of your life journey. Here are a few tips to think more positively and empower yourself: Have a daily positive thinking routine. Generally the time when you are just waking up, i.e., the half awake state, is best for you to start feeding positive thoughts about yourself. The mind is more accepting of suggestion at that time. You can just feed your brain with happy and positive thoughts about your situation and what you hope to achieve for yourself and your family. Creative positive visualization is another great method of positive thinking. At a set time, just picture your life in the way you want it to go. This is different from daydreaming. Creative visualization gears you up for action while daydreaming remains just wishful thinking. If you have difficulty in certain areas of your life, say at work or with your relationship, visualize a positive outcome. This will engage your mind in thinking of various action plans to get about that positive result. Positive affirmations are a great way of reminding yourself that all is well. Have patience with yourself as your mind will probably not even believe half the things that you are affirming. That's what affirmations are all about.They are statements that you feed your mind about what you are and what you can achieve. Positive affirmations can help you reprogram your mind to what your heart really desires. Let go. Feel that delicious sense of surrender as you just indulge in mentally letting go of things. As a busy person you probably end up trying to control the outcomes of every situation and feel bad when things don't go the way you expect them to. Remember things can go wrong from time to time. Like you, life is also not perfect, so why expect perfection from others? Learn to let go of that emotional baggage that you are carrying. The weight of the world needn't rest on your shoulders. Collective consciousness is where you should try to tap into. Think of situations where things can go horribly wrong for someone else. Send out a silent prayer for those unfortunate people in this world. Chances are that your prayers just might help some stranger badly in need of a prayer or two. This can only come back to you manifold. Help someone else become a positive person. This can only reaffirm your faith in positive thinking. Positive energy is what everyone naturally seeks and we can for sometime blame our friends or family for being a negative influence on our lives. This line of thinking will get you nowhere. Instead think what's the next best option? Think of how you can convert negative energy or experiences into positive ones. Initially you might meet with resistance, but remember if you are positive then positivity is yours for keeps.
A guide to resolving commitment phobiaCommitment phobia could impact both men and women. The age-old idea of only men being commitment phobic has fallen to ground and such a fear is shared by both the genders today. The main issue of this psychological condition is that the partner involved is also traumatically affected. The initial stages of the relationship involve making the partner feel secure about the relationship by assurances and verbal confessions about future needs of a long-term companionship. This makes the person involved with the commitment phobic trusting the latter, only to be taken aback and hurt when she/he walks out at the time, to seriously and sincerely declare their relationship. One who is afraid of commitment would often have many failed emotional relationships in the past with the justification of never having found the right person. Even though you might just be the perfect match, it is possible that they would find something wrong with your lifestyle in order to justify his/her fear. There would be consistent contradiction in their declaring of love for you and the actions which might hurt or injure the trust built on basis of the verbal assurances. Cause of Commitment Phobia: The root of the fear is the need to feel in control. A commitment phobic will feel that after a point of time there is a need to withdraw from their lover in order to have an 'upper hand' in the relationship and feel in control. Such a feeling might not be conscious. While the commitment phobic is pursuing their partner, they are also keeping in mind the way to get out of the relationship. Thus, any compliment given is empty flattery, for it presupposes their exit when the time comes. They are also afraid of facing the truth of their emotions. Coming from unstable backgrounds, commitment phobic people are very lonely and afraid of pain. The parents might have had a loveless and emotionally numb relationship. There could also be instances of physical and sexual abuse apart from the mental trauma the patient goes through as a child. Bailing out is their defence against being hurt any time in the future. Thus, the only thing they are doing in the relationship is to make sure they have the power in their hands (via complimenting and making you believe in them) and to make you depend on them. Once you are dependent and look for a solid assurance of their existence in your life, they will walk out.  Due to the fear of getting hurt, no amount of emotional intimacy and efforts seem to be sufficient for them to believe in you. However, remember that it is possible to cure the condition with proper psychological and emotional support. Contrary to popular belief, both men and women suffer from commitment phobia. The root of this fear is sown during the early years of the patient's childhood and a vicious cycle arises in which the patient withholds from forming a full-fledged relationship with anyone, blaming the failures on incapacities of the partner involved. This cycle can end only with the individual effort and support of companions and lover. Treatment of Commitment Phobia: The main aim in treatment of commitment phobia is to change the way the patient thinks about relationships. If you know someone who is a commitment phobic or if you are afraid of commitment, then here are five ways to deal with it: Way 1- Accept YourselfYou are looking for a perfect partner in an ideal context. You want a long-term loving relationship, but you have experienced throughyour life that such relationships are filled with pain and assume that eventually all relationships are only bundles of pain. This is manifested by your tendency to obsessively find something wrong with your partner. You know that your partner is loving and doing everything they can to make the relationship work, even then you find something wrong with them. When you think about commitment, you feel suffocated, bored, or at danger because it would require you to let your guards down to a person, thus becoming open to being in pain again. Accept yourself. Don't distort who you are. Write down all you feel about relationships and accept it. Think about the past relationships you have had and admit that your fear has led to breaking up of many emotional relationships in the past. Way 2- Understanding Your ConditionBecome aware of what is mentally happening when you are running away from commitment. By knowing what is exactly happening when you are walking out of a relationship, you will be able to handle and help yourself well. Way 3- Find The Root of Your FearsExplore the sources for what you feel about relationships and commitment. Discover incidents in childhood which slowly disillusioned the image of loving relationships. Consider your ex-partners and admit their merits as well. By finding the root of your fears, you will be able to become aware of it when you are in the act of bailing out on a great relationship. Way 4- HypnotherapyThrough hypnotherapy, you will get to know the root of your fear. The process also involves creation of an unconscious transformation in the patient in the form of thoughts, feelings, and attitude. Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) and Lifespan Integration are also helpful ways to treat commitment phobia. Way 5- Consciously Think About The Pros As WellThink about the loving relationships you have wanted and understand that relationships are filled with ups and downs. Every person is guarded naturally against pain and you do not have to excessively fortify your emotions. Write down all the good things about your lover. Also note down the things you find faulty about them. Then, ask yourself if your act of complaining is much like the desires your parents or closed ones might have imposed on you. Know that every person has a set of incapacities, and as long as it does not affect their love towards you, you should not be worried by it. Way 6- Imagine The UltimateIf you are not going to work on the commitment phobia, realize that you will never be able to establish the loving relationship you have always wanted. To make sure that you do not end up missing out on the wonderful experience, you have to weigh the relationship wholly. As mentioned earlier, write down both the pros and cons. Weigh your fears and decide what you feel. Way 7- Control Your Urges to Walk OutYou might be urged to leave the moment you find an imperfection in the other. Assure yourself to understand your partner. Take your time, but do not walk out. Learn to stay and work on the issues that the other might have. Way 8- CommunicateOne of the main problems that commitment phobic people have is that they do not talk about their problems, as they believe to open up about their emotions would mean to be vulnerable and to lose their power in the relationship. If your partner loves and cares about you, then open up to him/her. Let him/her know how you feel. This would prepare the other for any tough situations in the future, and you would also learn to judge and trust the other. Way 9- The Time Is NowYou might think about all the bad things in your current relationship and talk it out. However, remember that you might just be missing out on a beautiful experience because of your fear. If you want to work on your commitment issues, the time is now. Learn about your partner more and judge your relationship objectively. Be aware of any fears that arise and their source. Answer the fears rationally and do not suppress them. Slowly, talk to your partner and deal with the phobia. Way 10- Love Yourself And Build Strong RelationshipsThe first step to treating any phobia is to accept oneself and begin the process of being compassionate to oneself. Love yourself. Often, there is a fertile ground of low self-esteem boiling under the over-confidence about demerits of the other. Accept your incapacities as well as merits. Build your relationship with honesty and gradually let open the doors of your love. You do not have to suppress any of your fears. You have to confront and answer them. By communicating with your partner and remembering to receive their love without complaint, you will be able to overcome your fears completely.
Fruit diet can be dangerousFruits are healthy and provide lots of nutrition, vitamins, antioxidants, carbohydrates, fibre and bioflavanoids to the body.These things together protect your body from different health conditions and heart disease. However if you only eat fruit, you miss many other essential nutrients such as fats and protein. This can upset your stomach and lead to indigestion. Hence it is very important to take a well-balanced diet to remain healthy. Check out why you should not rely solely on fruits for living. Fruits do not provide protein Protein is highly important for your growth and development. By eating only fruits, you are restricting your intake of proteins that can stop your overall development process. Your body requires calories and energy on a regular basis. Each cell of your body contains protein. To keep your body cells in top working condition it is important that you include protein-rich foods such as lentils, soy products,  nuts and beans in your regular diet. You can also consume low-fat dairy, lean meat, fish and skinless poultry to provide required amount of protein to your body. Fruits do not provide fat Although excess of fat is not good for health, it is essential that your body requires on daily basis to ensure smooth functioning of your immune system and also to help your body absorb various minerals and vitamins provided by other foods like fruit. If you continue being a fruitarian for long duration, the chances of stroke due to brain haemorrhage increases. According to health experts, you should get around 20 to 35 percent of your daily calories from fat. To provide your body with good fats you should include soybean, sunflower, olive or canola oil in your diet. Fish and poultry also provide good amount of healthy fats to the body. Too much of fruits can lead to digestive problems Fruits provide fibres to the body in large amounts. Although your body needs fibre as it is one of the essential nutrients, getting too much of fibre can lead to side effects. Fibre works as broom to clear of your abdomen and aid in the digestion process. However, too much of fibre leads to stomach problems and cause symptoms such as gas, cramps and bloating. Sometimes it may also lead to chronic diarrhoea, dehydration and loose stools. On a regular basis, a woman requires only 22 to 28 gm of fiber per day and a man needs 34 to 38 gm. Apart from fruits, seeds, vegetables and whole grains also provide fibre to the body. Other considerations If you limit your intake to fruits, you may not get enough calories required for producing the required amount of energy. Consuming calories less than 1100 per day can lead to lot of side-effects such as intolerance to cold, gallstones, hair loss and fatigue. So although fruits taste wonderful and are very tempting, being a fruitarian is not the best thing for your health. Your body needs all the nutrients for carrying out its different activities and hence you should include variety of foods in your diet.  
How to say 'Bye' to split ends? Check out these 10 tips!One of the main reasons for split ends is the use of curling irons and other heat-induced styling treatments. When you go for hair products like hair colors or perms, the shield over your hair's shaft that protects it can get stripped off, thus making your hair liable to split ends. You could also be mechanically stressing your hair by pulling them too much while combing or combing repeatedly. Remember that rubbing your hair up towards the direction of the scalp does not lead to split ends. While there is no remedy to treat split ends, there are ways in which you can keep them away. Did you know that a medical research showed that the only way to keep split ends away is to put a stop on the excessive use of chemical on it? Hairdresser, Holly Kensen, says that split ends are the results of pushing out the natural process and pulling in too many chemicals. It is best to stay away from the styling products and embrace your natural hair! TIP 1 : Get hold of a piece of rosemary (fresh ones are the best!) and immerse them in a cup of hot water for 30 minutes. Once the temperature of the water is back to normal, whisk an egg into it. Mix this blend onto your hair. Rinse after 15 minutes using a light shampoo. TIP 2 : Bring home a ripe papaya and cut it into halves. Choose the part which you believe will be sufficient for your hair. Take off the skin and seeds. Mash it until it becomes a paste. Then, drop a cup of yogurt and stir them into a smooth paste. Apply it on your hair and let it hold for about 30 minutes. Use cold water to rinse it off. TIP 3 : Condition your hair with castor oil. Mix equal amounts of castor, almond, and olive oil and apply it on your hair generously. Wrap your hair in a towel and let it stay for 30 minutes. Then, shampoo your hair. TIP 4 : After you have shampooed your hair, apply a mix of cream and milk on them for about 20 minutes. Focus especially on the ends. Rinse your hair with cold water. TIP 5 :If you decide to trim your hair on your own, then don't use the paper scissors! They are called 'paper' scissors for a reason. Get hold of hair shears which will not leave your ends damaged. TIP 6 : Trim your hair every six to eight weeks at least up to ¼ to 1 inch. Due to our environment, it is natural for the hair to get damaged in a few weeks. It is important to remove the split ends and let them grow healthy. TIP 7 : Do not trust products which say that they can 'cure' your split ends. Split ends are not curable. They are preventable. The only thing that these products do is to seal up the splits which only makes your hair unhealthy. TIP 8 : Try to stay away from chemicals as much as you can. Chemicals only tamper with your natural hair and ruin their texture. If you really have to use it then make sure you condition them regularly. TIP 9 : Use coconut oil to fix your split ends. Buy an extra-virgin and organic coconut oil. Before washing your hair, apply about 2 spoons of the oil on your dry hair. Emphasize on the hair ends. If you want, you can steam your hair for some time (about 20 minutes). Then, wash your hair with a light shampoo and condition them. TIP 10 :This is one of the best ways to help your split ends stay away: Get hold of chamomile tea and brew it on a pot. Then pre-rinse your hair with it. After you have rinsed them, wash and condition your hair normally.
7 Pains you should not ignoreWhen the body cries out in pain, most of the times, you know what is bringing that pain, and you do what will help relieve the pain. For example, a serious workout may cause sore aching muscles, for which you will rest a day or two, or take a painkiller. What does one do to know why a body part is paining? One needs to sit up and take notice! The pain could be anything, from a heart attack, to an aneurysm, and could cost you your life! Pain in the head: Headaches are the most frequent pains that we suffer from. Headache could be due to a migraine, due to staying too long in the sun, due to a cold, or simply due to working too long without a break. However, in case you have a headache, and are not able to pinpoint to an obvious cause, rush to the emergency room. Headaches with no apparent cause may be due to a brain hemorrhage, a tumor in the brain, or an aneurysm in the brain arteries! Get yourself checked as soon as possible, if you keep getting headaches for no apparent reason. Pain in the jaw: This could be due to a caries ridden tooth. But most often it is due to an impending heart attack. The classical left sided chest pain radiating to the left little finger is not always seen in all cases of heart attacks. Pains to the jaw and the back are reported very frequently. Often, people tend to take the pain in the jaw lightly, and brush it off to a tooth problem. This may be potentially life threatening, as you never know the severity of the attack! Tingling, numbness and burning of the feet: Diabetes mellitus is a silent killer. Peripheral neuropathy is often the first complication of diabetes. Tingling numbness, and burning in the feet may be attributed to wearing tight shoes and to keeping your feet suffocated in socks all day long. Dipping your feet in a tub of cold water will give you a good night's sleep. But do not let it go at that. Get your blood sugar levels checked before it is too late! Pain in the calves: Do you get nightly pain in your calves that get better with putting your feet up? This is due to long standing hours at workplace, you may say. True, it is due to that. But, it is not something to be left unattended. Calf pains are due to deep vein thrombosis that occurs when the stagnated blood in the veins starts to form clots. The danger here is that the clot could break off and travel to your lungs causing pulmonary thromboembolism that is fatal! Take a break regularly and put up your feet frequently. Let the blood flow and not stagnate! Pain in the back: Most commonly, back pain is caused due to arthritis, and improper sitting postures. But if you suffer from high blood pressure, and are an alcoholic and smoker too, do not take your back pain lightly. It could be due to a heart attack or an aortic dissection! Pain in the abdomen: You may attribute this pain to gases, over eating or indigestion. While these may be occasional causes, persistent pains need to be checked. It could be anything from a gall stone, to gastric ulcers, to a swollen liver, or maybe even pancreatic cancer! Vague, medically inexplicable pains: When you have a recurrent headache or a stomach ache or a backache and you come out with a 'perfectly healthy' report after visiting all the specialists, it is perhaps time to seek the help of a psychiatrist or a counsellor. Your pains could actually be a symptom of depression. Psychosomatic pains are on the rise. The stresses we face in our lives everyday get pushed to our subconscious, and eventually are pushed up bodily in the form of unexplained aches and pains!
Winter - When your heart feels the cold too!As per a study in America, 193.6 people of every 10000 people die of a heart disease every year. 53% of the heart attacks occur in the winter months. Heart diseases have a seasonal trend as found by medical research recently. A team of medical researchers recently conducted a survey which saw 10,000 participants between the ages 35 to 80 from around seven European countries. The study was conducted to see if there is any seasonal variation in the presentation of heart diseases. The participants were measured on the parameters of blood pressure, waist circumference, body mass index, blood glucose levels and blood lipid levels. The parameters were later adjusted for sex, age and smoking. The results revealed that the incidence of heart disease shows an upward trend in the winter month [Jan to Feb] as compared to the summer months [June-Aug]. The researchers accept that there is no logical explanation to these findings. A plausible cause being the fact that the eating habits change in winter. One tends to eat more which in turn increases the cholesterol levels leading to heart diseases. Several other theories are being put forth. According to one, during the winter months the body undergoes hormonal imbalance. The day and night variation in the hormone levels, especially that of cortisol varies. This results in a lower threshold for heart attacks. Yet another theory says that the cold temperature tends to constrict the arteries narrowing the blood flow to the heart tissue and this result in a heart attack. On the basis of this study, scientists advise that more attention is to be paid to heart health during the winters.
Impact of sexual dissatisfaction on mental healthIn an idyllic world, this may sound all "sugar and spice and everything nice," but in reality the matter of having sex is considered to be a taboo, something that is looked down upon - not just in third world countries, but in some parts of the  developed world as well. Add to that the effects of being sexually dissatisfied, which is also looked down upon and frowned upon. When a couple finally decides to take the plunge, there are the normal worries such as sexual compatibility, satisfaction, frequency, taboos, etc. What if your spouse/partner is dissatisfied? What if he/she doesn't consider it a pleasurable experience? These questions often arise in any relationship and it is only natural, but what happens when these worries often turn into realities? The dissatisfaction takes a toll on your mental health. Yes, your mental health suffers thanks to your sexual dissatisfaction. Every partner has some amount of expectations as far as sex is concerned, and when those expectations are not matched, dissatisfaction begins to set in. Generally speaking, when a person is sexually satisfied, he or she is always in a better frame of mind, but when they are not, their behavior around people goes downhill. Not just that, but their frustration and angst builds up, taking a toll on their mental health and their relationships as well. Many a times when the couple is incompatible, they decide to keep quiet rather than talk about it. This takes a toll on their mental health, which then turns into stress and its build up can lead to depression, or worse. Even the memories of past transgressions and the guilt after can lead to sexual dissatisfaction, which can either make or break any relationship. There are multiple reasons as to why a person is dissatisfied sexually, be it due to sexual dysfunctions, lower stamina, sexual orientation, or so forth! Rather than accepting that there is a problem, people usually turn to drugs, alcohol, or even someone else for dependency, which also causes mental as well as hormonal imbalance. Most people when asked about sexual dissatisfaction shy away than deal with it, as they are ashamed of it and are afraid to talk to about it. However, what they don't realize is that not talking about it will only lead to problems such as depression, anxiety, dependency, and bouts of sudden outburst which can lead to a severed relationship, not just with your spouse or partner, but also with your family and friends. Sexual dissatisfaction is often the primary cause of depression, which, if not treated, can lead to a host of other problems. So if you are suffering from sexual dissatisfaction and are under great amount of mental strain, it is always better to be open about it to your partner or consult a therapist. Prevention is always better than a cure! Talking about it to someone can lead to you releasing your mental strain and the end result will be your personal satisfaction.
How to talk about STDsThese are dangerous times that we live in. Just the sheer number of people affected by sex related problems, diseases and conditions all over the world is simply terrifying. AIDS, venereal infections like syphilis and gonorrhea, herpes, HPV etc. are rampant and it calls for some responsible sexual behavior. However, that's a utopian world where humans will be monogamous and will behave responsibly. Even single people might get exposed to these diseases through indulging in risky sexual contact. Imagine doling out $750,000, as a woman in the US got from her husband because he gave her herpes. Even if you are not held legally accountable, what about moral responsibility to own up and discuss a possible STD infection with your partner! Take the case of Jack a happily married man for ten years who had casual sex when out of town on an official trip. He showed no obvious symptoms of any infection but in a month, his wife showed signs of herpes and his marriage crumbled as his wife struggled to come to terms with her husband's obvious infidelity and his callous manner in exposing her to a serious sexual infection. Call it ignorance but sometimes a person might engage in sexual intercourse and contract a disease which he might even not be aware of until the symptoms start appearing. (Refer article on Syphilis on www.topdoctorsonline.com) By then, he might have, in all probability, passed it on to his regular sexual partner or spouse. Or perhaps, there is another possibility that the person knows that he has contracted a sexual infection but doesn't know how to break the news to his partner.  If a person is aware of his infection, yet exposes another person knowingly, it is akin to premeditated murder. Yes, it is going to be a difficult thing to tell your partner which might even signal the end of the relationship or cause severe strain on it. So, if you are caught in a situation like this, what would you do? The option would be to visit a sex therapist and confide in him and then take an appointment for both and let the professional break it to the partner. That is of course if you are in a stable relationship. For those who both party to casual sex, the infected person generally won't be that open about his infection and may even choose not to care particularly if the other person is a complete stranger. A report in MedlinePlus news reveals some more shocking statistics: Many people said they occasionally, rarely or never got tested before having sex with casual partners (50 percent) or long-term partners (39 percent). Of the people who did discuss STD testing, very few discussed concurrent sexual partners or when partners' testing occurred in relation to their last sex act. Only half explained what types of STDs their partner had been tested for. These issues are important components of assessing STD risk, the researchers said. About one-third of participants reported telling a partner they didn't have an STD even though they hadn't been tested since their last sexual partner. One U.S. woman was awarded $750,000 in court from her ex-husband because he gave her herpes, and the legal trend is to make people accountable. (http://www.dummies.com/how-to/content/how-to-talk-to-a-partner-about-stds.html) Remember even wearing a condom is not a 100% guarantee that the infection won't pass on to the other person but that's the least that you can do if you don't have the courage to spill the beans about your condition. If you feel that your partner may be indulging in sexual activity with multiple partners and if you feel he might be infected, then you are well within your rights to decline to have sex with him until he/she gets tested. If you notice sores around the genitals do not indulge in oral or anal sex or any kind of sex and insist on a condom always; it could save your life.
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