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Fairness scream: The new male obsession"Mirror, Mirror on the wall, who's the fairest one of all?" The words at once evoke images of the evil queen as she strikes a vain pose at the looking glass. However, these days one needs to be more accommodating and make way for a preening gent to put forth the above query. All these days, fairness would be a quality an Indian male would look for in his wife. Just see the Fair & Lovely ads to know what we mean. But today, this very obsession has turned on itself. More and more men are being just as exacting about their own skin color, complexion and tone as their female counterparts. Just take a look at all those TV commercials where celebrity endorsements dangle the bait of fairness creams, lotions and body wash specially designed for teenagers and young men seeking to take them to the promised land of social and sexual success. But before you rush to buy that cream, here's what that fairness is all about Fairness is skin cell deep Fair, ruddy, dark or wheatish is all determined primarily by the melanin content in our skin cells. Some races like the Africans have a high melanin content thereby giving them a dark colour while Europeans are of a lighter skin colour due to low melanin content. So whether you use an expensive fairness cream or go in for beauty treatments at luxurious beauty spas, genetics will have a final say on the matter. How fairness creams work...or do they? Fairness creams contain chemicals which block the production of melanin in the skin and thus enable a lighter skin tone and a fairer complexion. Mostly melanin production in men is more than females, which is why women's fairness creams don't have so much of an effect on men. The cosmetic industry recognized this factor and thus developed products designed for the male skin. However, some of these "men's only" fairness brands are glorified sunblock creams which block the harmful ultra violet radiation of the sun which blackens the skin. The dark side of fair Some of the beauty treatments and fairness creams contain chemicals like hydroquinone, mercury, and even steroids, which could do more harm than good. If you are obsessed about fairness, the least you could do is use a branded product (though that is no guarantee of its efficacy!). First sample it to check of it suits your skin. If a rash breaks out, consult a skin specialist immediately. Finally, it is the health of the skin which is more important than colour. So exercise regularly or use natural skin treatments like orange peels, cucumber patches to enhance your skin tone. Don't give in to peer pressure. The obsession for fairness can lead to low self-esteem and needless rivalry. Cosmetologists and marketers of fairness products are the only ones who will laugh their way to the bank at your cost. So, if you have a darker skin colour you don't have to go in for expensive remedies just because men in your age group find it cool. Self-acceptance is much better remedy than any beauty treatment in the world.  
Inspiring fitness goals for womenBeing fit comes with the benefit of enhanced mood and lowered hormonal rages. Coupled with right proportion of sleep, hydration, and a job you love, you will be nearing towards a perfect body. Goal 1: WorkOut Your Body to A Song! Make a playlist of all the songs you love and choose to execute your regime through it. Goal 2: "Be Yourself" Challenge Holistically develop your body by acknowledging what you love to do. Choose a sport that you love and join a group. If you love animals, then walk your dog which will let you lose weight and enjoy the company of pets. If painting or photography interests you, then trekking along landscapes of beauty should be your weekend getaway. Goal 3: Become the Hourglass with 1-Month Workout Regime Evaluate your body type and create a month-long regime to gradually progress towards animpeccable body shape and continue it beyond the initial 1 month. Start with small steps and do not go in for crash diets. Choose healthier snacks. Add a bit ofsleep to your daily dose in case you tend to sleep less. Begin with 15minutes of workout containing exercises recommended by your trainer to suit your body. Goal 4: Be the Health-Smart Mom! Lose the extra pounds you brought on during pregnancy and set a role model for your children. Go to the park with your children and play games with them. Pick up sports that you all can share and do together! Goal 5: The Yoga Guru Pick up yoga and start from the first step. Did you know that the initiation of anyone into the system of Yoga occurs through stage of Yama? Yama refers to the ethical principles that will guide your life while you move towards taking control of your life. The five Yamasin yoga are non-violence, truthfulness, non-stealing, celibacy, and non-possessiveness. They form the ground for your body to start on a healthy path. Move yourself towards following these principles and pick up the following asanas (body-postures) to lose weight: setu band (the bridge pose), bhekasana, dhanurasana, shalabhasana, chakki chalan, nauka chalan, and sarvangasana. A healthy lifestyle is the framework for any fitness goal. Do not go for unrealistic or transient goals. Start by making preparatory changes in your lifestyle: Lower your junk food intake, sleep adequately, drink at least two liters of water daily and hydrate your body sufficiently. Goal 6: Going Back to Nature Plan a trekking trip to your dream destination and walk your fat away. Bring back home a healthier body and a more peaceful mind. Goal 7: Master Your Body Make a journal of all activities you do in a day. The intention is to become aware of your habits that might be hurting your body unknowingly. Trace habits like binging on a snack while watching TV, sitting in a bad posture while on the desk and reading a book at a dimly lit place may be few pointers. This is a long-term challenge (4 months) to bring your body under your control through self-awareness. Goal 8: Green Regime Go for a diet which involves vegetables, fruits, and grains. Detoxify your body by being off junk food for at least two months. Goal 9: Bony to Healthy Increase your weight to become the inspiration for underweight people and guide them towards a healthy body. Goal 10: Run for the World Join marathons and runs for different social causes. Commonly known as 'Run for a Cause,' be the torchbearer to a certain cause by joining organizations that work on the same and initiating a run or marathon. This will not only prepare your body and move it towards healthy living; you will also be doing your part for the others.
Honeymoon cystitisHoneymoon cystitis is a term for urinary tract infections that occur commonly during early marriage. Sexual intercourse is the primary reason for developing this infection. The infection occurs when the E. coli bacteria that are normally present in the bowel are introduced into the urethra. This may happen through sexual intercourse, inserting unclean fingers or objects into the vagina. Women who wash their private parts from the back to front also have an increased chance of developing infection. Symptoms of honeymoon cystitis may include a burning or painful sensation during urination, the urge to urinate frequently, cloudy urine, blood-tinged urine, and/or pain above the pubic bone. Any of these is enough o play a spoilsport and dampen your honeymoon mood! Symptoms of honeymoon cystitis generally emerge within a day or two after bacteria are introduced into the urethra. A physician can confirm the diagnosis of infection through a simple urine test. The treatment usually involves antibiotics and pain-killers. What care should you take to avoid honeymoon cystitis from recurring? Use water based lubricant during sexual intercourse Urinate before and immediately after intercourse to flush out the bacteria from the urethra. Drink plenty of water to keep the urine normal Avoid coffee, tea and aerated drinks See a gynaecologist or a urologist if the problem recurs.  Urinary tract infections are extremely common in women and are the leading cause for visits to the doctor.
Your bundle of joy comes with bundles of fascinating facts Blue-eyed wonder: Most babies are born blue-eyed. The melanin pigment that decides the color of the eyes is not developed at the time of birth. So the babies are born with blue/light eyes irrespective of the genetic makeup. By the time the baby is 6-7 months old, the pigments start developing and the baby's eye colour changes as per the genetic makeup of the parents. Marked for life: One in every three infant is born with a birthmark! No tears: That is true! New born babies do not shed any tears. The lacrimal duct and the tear glands are well developed but they produce just enough tears for lubrication. Actual tears start appearing after one month of age. Crawling wonders: New research has found that babies can crawl almost as soon as they are born. When left to themselves, they are quite capable of using their limbs and find their way to food i.e. the mother's breast.And we thought that they are tiny helpless creatures! Temperature sensitivity: Babies are much more sensitive to temperature changes and body heat.Though the baby can't throw off the clothes to cool down, it is smart enough to do other things. When the baby is cold, it will move around more and if it is too hot it may just lie still as if sunbathing. Touch therapy: Touch is the most highly developed sensation in babies, even in premature ones. The touch sensation develops from head to toe with the mouth being the most sensitive. No wonder they tend to put everything in their mouths. Short-sighted: Babies are short sighted at birth. Their vision is set to a limit of 8-to-12 inches. They can see people and objects clearly only if they are within this range. Brain size: The brain grows at such a rate in newborns that by the end of the first year,the brain is double the birth size and half its final size! Palmar Grasp: New born babies have a strong grip, as strong as a monkey's. The grip is so strong that if you dangle them on one hand, they can support their own weight. This probably originated from the primitive survival instinct. This strong grasp reduces after a couple of months. Taste buds: Babies have more than 10,000 taste buds situated all over the tongue and even at the roof and sides. As they grow, these extra taste buds disappear.
Cranky kids in a diner? dealing with them made a bit easy!This has happened to many a parent. They make a reservation at a fine dining restaurant, perhaps with friends and relatives. But their kid screams, and cries,disturbing the entire restaurant, and spoiling the general mood. For this reason, many parents avoid going out altogether, especially to fancy places. But there are ways in which you can handle the toddler when you are at a restaurant. We will show you how. Carry toys Restaurant may be boring at times for toddlers. That's why they turn peevish and may start playing with forks, spoons or knife. So carry some toys, crayons, notebooks, or even a story book, which will keep them busy and you can have a good time. Order something yummy and healthy for the kid A hungry kid is an angry kid. So, order something which is your kid's favorite and also healthy at the same time. Or you can carry something along with you like fruits breads, cherries or other nutritious treats. Keep responding to what kid says The best way to keep childrenwell behavedis to talk to them and respond whenever the child speaks. Don't avoid them or get too engrossed with other people. They get cranky when they don't get a response from you. Take a round with your kid When the kid becomes difficult to handle, just pick him in your arms and take a mini tour of the restaurant or walk outside. This will distract him and relieve his boredom. Don't tolerate any bad behavior If the bad behavior of the kids is intolerable, then firmly tell them that they need to adopt good manners if they want to visit restaurants again. Disturbing other diners is not acceptable. But it doesn't mean that you punish them.You just have to remove them to a place where they don't bother anyone. Make your outing relaxed and enjoyable Above all, don't forget to have fun and make it an enjoyable evening. Don't get too carried away disciplining the kid. You can afford to be a bit silly and enjoy the time with your child.
CryophobiaCold or hot can be a very subjective term as every person's tolerance for either heat or cold can vary. When some of us react in an extreme manner to all things cold, then it could be a case of cryophobia - the fear of catching cold or the fear of cold weather. Derived from the Greek "kryos" + phobos gives us cryophobia, which is a mental aberration where the mind develops a nagging and persistent fear of all things cold - be it cold weather, ice-cream, or maybe even a cold shoulder! Jokes apart, a person suffering from this condition could really experience 'hot weather' in his relationships as he will completely avoid any contact with anything cold. If the weather is a bit nippy then that's a veritable disaster for Mr. 'Avoid De Cold' as he will do everything in his power to stay indoors, for instance - turn on the central heating and wrap himself up until the mercury rises to an agreeable level. Though it is decidedly different from your run-of-the mill phobias, cryophobia could be of various types. There are some who are only afraid of cold in the 'weather' sense and are otherwise cool about touching cold objects or even having an ice-cream. While there are some who would probably break out into, if you will excuse the term, 'cold sweat,' even while watching floating icebergs on a Nat-Geo documentary. So, the sensation of cold is quite subjective, and hence the various strains of cryophobia. Generally, this fear would manifest quite logically for those who have occasioned to be trapped under ice accidently or maybe those who have suffered frost bite from exposure to cold weather during a skiing holiday. Under such circumstances, avoidance, though irrational, could be perfectly logical. If you monitor weather reports constantly and experience discomfort even in moderate climates, then you should get yourself checked for cryophobia, as chances are that soon you will be restricting yourself indoors and cutting yourself off from the rest of the world. Some people might just overcome fear or anxiety by wearing an extra layer of the woolens or turning up the central heating. For deep seated fears, it may require long-term counseling or medication. Some people might just have this morbid fear of developing pneumonia from a common cold and hence may take elaborate measures to avoid going out during cold days. This too can be quite normal since most of us don't want to call a day off from work due to a nasty cold. But despite adequate protection if you are still afraid of venturing out to work or are avoiding social contact just because of an irrational fear of catching cold when the weather outside is made for the beach and you are in the middle of summer! Then the catchphrase is - You have cryophobia!
Crossing the smoke screenWhy should someone quit smoking? Smoking is probably the worst sedentary lifestyle habit that we pick up. Quitting smoking changes everything right from the way you feel, taste and smell, your breath smells better and even your cough goes away. Quitting smoking cuts down the risk of cancer, stroke, neuropathy, heart disease and breathing disorders like bronchitis, pneumonia, and emphysema. Not just that, quitting saves money too... just one of the many financial rewards of quitting. Quit Smoking Tips Write down the reasons you want to quit for, and how it will benefit you: for e.g. live longer, feel better, family safety, save money, smell better, find a soul mate easily, etc. You know what's bad about smoking and you know what you'll get by quitting. Read the list daily. Ask for help from your family and friends. Help and support of family and friends without being judgmental helps a lot. You need their support when you become irritable and even irrational while you withdraw from your smoking habit. Set a Deadline. Set a quit date when you will extinguish forever. Prepare a plan. Talk with doctor and take his support and guidance. Exercise. Exercise helps relieve stress and recovers body from damage caused due to cigarettes. Start slow and increase up to 30 to 40 minutes. Begin to breathe. Daily deep breathing for 5-15 minutes will help cleanse the respiratory system and provide more oxygen repairing the damage caused to respiratory system and help cope with withdrawal symptoms. Do not quit abruptly. Cut down on cigarettes gradually. Plan everything about number of cigarettes you will smoke each day till the quit date, reduce the number each day. Buy single cigarette at a time. This helps a great deal to limit smoking. Change brands. This way you won't enjoy smoking as much. Undertake social commitment. Keep your packet of cigarettes with someone else, so that you have to ask for them each time you want to smoke. This way you'll feel guilty about asking and hence smoking; hence lowering the number of times you smoke. Find a mate who is trying to quit. This will boost the morale and keep up the positivity. Try finding a quitting chat room. Learn what triggers desire to smoke - like stress, the end of a meal, arrival at work, entering a bar, etc. Avoid these triggers or if that's impossible, plan alternative ways to deal with the triggers. Now, after you have read this, sit down and write your own list suitable to your personality and way of doing things and create your own plan for quitting.  
21 foods for a healthy heartFollowing is a list of heart-healthy food substances: Garlic: Did you ever think that the commonly available garlic in your kitchen can be heart healthy? It may be smelly for some, but for the heart it is a soothing substance. Garlic is known to control blood pressure, serum triglyceride level & cholesterol level. Carrot: Carrots, though taste sweet, have the ability to control blood sugar levels because of high level of antioxidants in them. So include carrots in your diet, especially in salads. Orange: This juicy fruit has cholesterol-lowering ability because of fibre pectin in it and also helps control blood pressure. Almonds: Though all nuts are believed to be nutritious, almonds are considered to be heart healthy. Almonds are rich in vitamin E, calcium, plant sterols, fibre and antioxidants. Almonds help in lowering LDL cholesterol and reducing risk of diabetes. Walnuts: Walnuts are rich in omega 3 fatty acids, monounsaturated fats which help in lowering cholesterol levels.  Oatmeal: Oats are very healthy & help in lowering the bad LDL cholesterol. You can have one bowl of oatmeal mixed in milk along with nuts as breakfast. Flaxseed: This honey coloured shiny seeds contain substances which are heart healthy, such as lignans, ALA and omega 3 fatty acids. It helps in lowering cholesterol level and controlling diabetes. Tofu: It is a type of soybean protein which can be replaced with paneer. Tofu is rich in fibre and polyunsaturated fats which prevent clogging of arteries.  Barley: The fibre in barley is believed to lower cholesterol and blood glucose levels.  Tuna fish: Tuna fish is rich in omega 3 fatty acids which helps in lowering cholesterol levels.  Salmon: It is very good for heart as it is rich in omega 3, EPA and DHA. It lowers and reduces the risk of inflammation in arteries. It is also believed to maintain the ratio of good cholesterol to bad cholesterol. Red wine: Red wine contains catechins and resveratrol, good for heart health.  Black beans: They are a rich source of magnesium which helps in lowering blood pressure. It also contains folate, antioxidants and fibre which is helpful in controlling blood sugar and cholesterol levels. Fresh herbs: If you are hypertensive and want to control your salt intake then try using fresh herbs as a substitute for salt. It also contains antioxidants which are good for heart. Herbs include rosemary, sage, oregano and thyme. Extra virgin olive oil: This is rich in heart-healthy polyphenols & monounsaturated fats. As it's very costly you can use it as a topping for bread or salad. Sweet potatoes: White potatoes are believed to increase glycemic index so you can replace them with sweet potatoes. It is heart healthy as it has low glycemic index and also contains fibre, vitamin A and lycopene. Low fat yoghurt: You can include this in your breakfast safely as it contains calcium & potassium which helps in lowering blood pressure. Dried cherries: They are rich in anthocyanins and antioxidants which help in neutralizing the action of enzymes which cause plaque formation. In winter you should opt for strawberries, blueberries for a healthy heart. Cayenne chili pepper: Your blood sugar normally increases post a meal. By sprinkling cayenne chili pepper over your food can help preventing insulin level spike post meals. Hot cocoa: Coffee helps in patients with type 2 diabetes. Hot cocoa contains antioxidants helpful for heart. Kosher salt:  This is very beneficial for heart patients as it contains half the amount of sodium as compared to table salt and thus helps in controlling high blood pressure.
10 Makeup myths bustedMyth 1: You do not need Primers if you have evenly applied foundation and moisturized your skin well. Fact: Primers are basically used to fill your fine lines, reduce the visibility of your pores and keep your foundation looking fresh and radiant, for longer. With age, your skin develops its natural flaws and the use of primers becomes mandatory. For best results, use your primer after moisturizing your facial skin and before applying your foundation. Myth 2: Red Lipstick does not look good on everyone. Fact: Generally, red can look good on everyone. The trick is to find the right shade of red that suits  your particular skin tone. However, to play it safe you may start using red lip colors with blue undertones, as they look good almost on everyone. But remember, learning to apply lipstick the right way, is just as important for the right effect. With just a little patience and practice, you can surely achieve those red hot lips, you've always dreamt of. Myth 3: Foundation should match your cheek, hand, neck or forehead. Fact: Getting the perfect shade of foundation is one of the toughest tasks, while choosing your makeup products. Your facial skin is much lighter than your hands; yet at the same time, it's a tad bit darker on the sides and forehead. Hence, the best way to select a foundation is to check the stripes on your jawline. But, always remember to step out into the natural light while making this crucial decision. Myth 4: You can change the lip-size using lip plumper. Fact: Ok Ladies, a lip plumper will definitely not change the size of your lips. The way they work is that they give your lips a swollen appearance, by stimulating the blood flow and irritating the lips. The main ingredients in a lip plumper are hot pepper, menthol, caffeine and cinnamon which results in the temporary pronounced pout, which soon wears off. Myth 5: Pumping the Mascara eliminates Clumps. Fact: If you pump your mascara tube, you're actually pumping in more air, due to which the mascara solution dries out quickly and allows germs to breed in your mascara. The best way to eliminate clumps is to rotate the brush inside the mascara tube and then wipe it down with a tissue, before application. Myth 6: Never wear an eye shadow matching the color of your eyes. Fact: It is true that if you use contrasting colors, your eyes will pop and look bolder. However, this does not mean that if you have brown eyes, you avoid your favorite brown eye shadow. Myth 7: Choose a concealer that is lighter than the foundation. Fact: Every woman has a different skin tone and depending upon your skin tone, you might need more or less, foundation coverage. So, it is always better to choose a concealer that comes closest to the shade of your foundation. Myth 8: Always choose a foundation that is lighter in color compared to your skin tone. Fact: If you choose a shade of foundation lighter than your skin tone, after a while your face will start showing two different skin shades. Always, test the foundation on your jaw line and if it blends in seamlessly with your skin tone, that's definitely the right shade for you. Myth 9:  Makeup leads to acne. Fact: No research, until date, has conclusively proved that makeup causes acne. Poor hygiene, sleeping with your makeup on, not cleaning your makeup brushes regularly, and using the products beyond their date of expiry is what leads to breakouts on the skin. New products may also cause skin irritation; which is why, it is better to test them on your elbow, before using them directly on your facial skin. Myth 10: Tingling makeup products are perfectly fine. Fact: Makeup products that make your skin tingle are sure to damage your skin and cause injury. It may also lead to bacterial infections and pimples, so you should certainly avoid such products. You should never compromise on the quality of makeup products, or else your skin may have to suffer the side effects.
Bile block - Understanding gallbladder problemsRavi was a young intern working the night shifts in a government hospital when he was asked to examine a patient who had just been brought in. The patient was a 45-year-old, a fat man, who was complaining of pain in the right side of the abdomen along with nausea and vomiting. On inquiry it was revealed that he had eaten a very heavy fat-laden dinner. Remembering what his surgery professor had taught him about cholelithiaisis, Ravi immediately guessed what the diagnosis could be. He, however, sent the patient for a blood test and an abdominal scan. The reports confirmed Ravi’s suspicions- cholelithiasis, gallstones. The gallbladder is a tiny pear shaped organ that lies just below the liver. It is responsible for storing the bile that is produced by the liver for digesting food. It ensures the smooth outflow of the bile from the bile ducts. When the bile components aggregate in the gallbladder, they build up to form gallstones, similar to kidney stones. The gallstones are usually small enough to pass on to the intestines and be eliminated without causing too much trouble. At times, these stones may be big enough to block the outflow of the bile and give rise to a variety of symptoms depending on the size of the stone and severity of the block. The symptoms include -  Intermittent colic. A bloated sensation with constant nausea. Inability to tolerate fats. Vomiting.  Fever with chills if the stone becomes infected. Gall stones though found in both sexes, is more common in females. The risk factors for developing gallstones include - Diabetes. Organ transplant. Diseases like hemolytic anemia, sickle cell anemia. Liver cirrhosis. Failure of the gallbladder to empty properly, e.g., during pregnancy. Rapid weight and nutrition loss due to any reason. Gallstones are confirmed by a blood test to check the liver function and by an abdominal scan. Medications to dissolve the stones, and surgery in case of large stones that do not dissolve with medications, are the treatment options.
Advantage of the average - Automated continuous blood pressure monitoring technologyAlthough mercury sphygmomanometers (though a deadline is set for them to be phased out due to environmental concerns) are still considered the gold standards, the Aneroid and Digital counterparts represent the future of blood pressure monitoring. The need of long-term blood pressure monitoring arises with disorders and health conditions that demand more attention from the medical teams. Experts say that the fluctuations in BP in conditions like cardiovascular diseases, pregnancy, etc., if tracked at regular intervals, can reduce 22% of risks due to delay and no treatment. This necessity pushed the invention of invasive arterial blood pressure to be used during surgical procedures and further a continuous noninvasive arterial pressure measurement (CNAP) system. There have been multiple researches to overcome some of the roadblocks in measuring the arterial blood pressure in the noninvasive and external approach. Among these developments, the need for measurement of mean blood pressure was felt and the 24-hour BP variation in the patient was taken into account. The 24-hour model eliminates the errors in readings taken during clinic visits due to factors such as fluctuations as a result of white coat fear or after-effects of some stress or exertion. Trendsetting New-age Technology : In 2004, the medical world received the BpTRU non-invasive automatic blood pressure monitoring device. BpTRU devices proved to be a superior and more precise alternative when compared to other manual BP assessment techniques and even other 24-hour ABPM alternatives. The automated oscillometric devices precision and accuracy of assessed BP and heart rate is earmarked with a unique automatic technique - the device records 6 consecutive BP readings of the patient, discards the earliest, and the rest of the five values are put to average function and instantly the resultant mean BP reading flashes on the screen. Compatible with guidelines of American National Standard/Association for the Advancement of Medical Instrumentation (ANSI/AAMI EC13:2002) this is a time-saving, portable, and user-friendly device. A compact and automatic wrist cuff BP monitor, the smart blood pressure monitor that can be synchronized with with Apple’s iOS devices and a Bluetooth connectable and Android compatible blood pressure monitor marks the revolution of CNAP in modern times.
Reasons for skipping sexThe most important satisfaction brick in a marriage's foundation, sex is where we show the greatest trust, most openly express intimacy and make ourselves most vulnerable. It is the most personal and private area of our relationship. It is the one area that separates this relationship from all others. Yet, there are times for both husbands and wives when sex becomes a burden and not a blessing, an inconvenience instead of intimacy, and a job instead of jubilee. Curious as to why people might be skipping sex? This is only a partial list and far from exhaustive. Reasons related to your body: I have a migraine. I have a stomachache. My body is too tired. My breasts are too sore. I am too sleepy. I can't keep my eyes open. I just need to take a little nap first. Okay, but I have a rash. Okay, but I have several weird looking cold sores. Reasons related to your emotions: I am depressed. I am worried. I am sad. Cry Reasons related to your kids: The kids are still up. We might wake up the kids. I just had a baby. This baby is wearing me out. Reasons related to your experts: My therapist said I need to give myself some time. My counselor said I should create some boundaries. I have to see my Gynecologist tomorrow. The Doctor gave me these sleeping pills for stress and I just took one. Reasons related to your spouse: Who was that girl / guy you were talking to on the phone? Sex, Sex, Sex All you ever want is sex! Why can't you just hold me? You should have asked in a more romantic way! Why do you have to use such crude language? Reasons related to your weather: It's just too hot. It's just too cold. It's too humid. Reasons related to your economy: When the economy improves. When the interest rates go down. When inflation goes down Reasons related to your special circumstances: We just got back from vacation! When I lose 20 kgs. Reasons related to your friends: I need to make a call first. My friend said they only do it once a month. Reasons related to your pets: The dog can see us. The cat is on the bed. Reasons related to your finances: Okay, but first we need to talk about the bills. Why did you charge this hotel room on our credit card? Reasons related to your job or boss: I have to get up early tomorrow. I was up all night last night. I had a long day at work today. The boss just gave me a new project and I have a lot of work to do Reasons related to your religion: Doesn't the Bible warn against having too much sex. I am sorry, but I just took a vow. I am giving up sex for Lent. Reasons related to your in-laws: We are in your parent's house. I have not been able to concentrate since your mother Your parents will hear us. Offer an alternative: Can I just take care of you in the shower? Okay, but you have to drive the kids to school in the morning. Use evasive tactics: Sneak in and go to sleep early. Okay, but let's watch this movie first. It's just too late. I'll be there in a minute. (Take an hour) Can we just cuddle? I just need you to hold me. Ask a sensitive question: Did you go to the bank and make our deposit today? Have you seen the kid's report cards? Wait for your spouse to tease you and then say coldly, well, you just lost whatever you were going to get tonight.
The earlier yearsSexual concerns experienced during the drastic body changes and feelings of adolescence are often carried into adulthood. Sexual desires are powerful and frequently go beyond the earlier popular forms of sexual expression - kissing, hugging and petting without being aware of the consequences. Anxiety the commonest case of erectile dysfunction is compounded by the present life style - get-togethers, parties, with alcohol and drugs, visits to sex workers or massage parlours which offer other sexual services leading to unplanned, unprotected sex. Consequently seen are unwanted pregnancy, abortions, drug addiction, sexually transmitted diseases, anxiety and depression leading sometimes to suicide. Males seem to have more concerns then females. A common concern is nocturnal emission (night fall, Swapana Dosh) of semen and length of penis. Nocturnal emission of spermatic fluid is falsely believed to weaken a person. Really all that's happening is that excess of sperms is being thrown out to make place for the new ones. The length of the penis troubles many. Young people fall prey to advertisements that claim to lengthen it. The fact of the matter is that a penis an erection of 2.5 wide (10cms) is enough for a sexual intercourse for a person who knows the art to satisfy a partner. Ignorance about masturbation is widely prevalent among males of all ages leading to guilt, anxiety, depression and at times to suicide. Older men erroneously think their cause of erectile dysfunction or premature ejaculation is masturbation. Masturbation is a highly pleasurable act in males. It does not harm the body or exhaust the sperms. In fact it is a safe way to satisfy. Females also masturbate but the percentage to men is much less. They also seem more comfortable with the activity. Masturbation has gone through years of superstition fear of ill effects, considered as a unhealthy practice and considered sin by some religions. Fifty or more years ago doctors and activities thought it caused harm to the body. It is said that corn flakes, the popular breakfast cereal was specifically formulated by Mr. Keleog to help a person not to masturbate. Today thinking has changed. It is now thought that it is an activity that does not cause any harm to the body. It does not finish all the vital sperms over the years so that it will not hinder having children in future. Its wide misuse is common. Persons use it indiscriminatingly when they cannot sleep, when they are tense for e.g. before an examination, some do it more than four to six times a day, which only indicates their immaturity. When done to satisfy a natural sexual urge it is a healthy activity. It keeps the person safe from infection and is said to teach the person skill for sexual intercourse. Technology has helped in many ways but sometimes it creates problems. A person hooked on to porno sites to arouse his desire is found to cause a loss of self confidence conflict with the partner sexual intimacy and intercourse. Before marriage or a partnership both male and female have concerns. Females if they have a previous partner but are getting married to another worry about the husband finding out of their loss of virginity, others worry about the size of their breasts, excessive hair on body or excessive fear of pain at intercourse. Men worry about whether their penis is long enough whether their long standing masturbation will hinder intercourse or prevent them of being a father. The absent hymen a false notion for virginity can be congenitally absent, split by exercise like swimming, cycling etc. or most commonly by masturbation. The hymen therefore is no proof of virginity. Learning to do with what they have making full use of their points and feeling comfortable and proud of their bodies help a lot to overcome the concern. Adopting a safe sex policy is best achieved by masturbation; avoiding sex with an unknown person and multiple partners; during intercourse with sex workers not using condoms every time and being careful of oral sex. Satisfying each other by caressing, hugging, kissing etc. with clothes on is safe; without clothes extra vaginal sex by mutual masturbation is safe with a trusted partner and finally not so safe is vaginal intercourse unless done with a condom correctly worn.
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